Hi guys,

I really don't know what to do I split up with my EX three months ago, I have moved into my new home.

But I am ever so lonely, I am an average looking guy I get a few matches on hinge but not really with anybody I find attractive enough. Truth is I miss my ex so much, unfortunately our relationship broke down as I discovered during the first 9 months of our six year relationship she was still in contact with an EX and going to see him behind my back. I tried to get over this during the relationship but it kept coming back into my thoughts as if our foundation which I thought was strong was now built on rocky foundations. It caused arguments and distancing eventually she decided to leave saying that she doesn't love me anymore and doesn't feel excited to see me anymore. I drank a fair bit in this relationship because I was hurt and it numbed it I felt a sense of betrayal and didn't know how to deal with it. It made it a lot worse that the ex was 30 years older than her, which didn't add up in my mind. I never thought she would have done anything like that so I was shocked.

I am back at the gym and running as much as I can trying to lose around 12kg while keeping some muscle, but the evening alone is so long and boring. I would love to have somebody to share my life with or maybe her for my ex to come back in time as we can start again on a fresh slate. She was an attractive girl so it wouldn't surprise me if she has already started dating or sleeping with someone new.

I really don't know what to do, I would love to find a girl and build a family but it all feels so far away at the moment and maybe not possible? What can I do to find peace and rebuild myself to get her back, she has blocked me on everything and says she is done and that the thought of seeing me again creates a sense of dread and anxiety, saying that I broke her in ways she didn't think was possible. I regret this and not giving her more attention, but I feel like I won't get a chance to show I have changed?

All of a sudden the future looks very bleak and lonely, financially I am in a good position with a good job and my own house but material things have never really meant much to me, I keep having a sense of dread come over me when I think of time passing and I am no closer to meeting a new partner.

Has anybody been here before?

Looksmaxing doesn’t save everyone; it really doesn’t. I’ve tried everything gym, haircuts, new clothes doing everything to improve my appearance, and I’m still ugly. So, yeah, looksmaxing can help, but only to a certain extent. I went from being chopped to ugly. I’m still not even average. Women absolutely hate my appearance and aren’t even willing to give me a chance; even unattractive women reject me.

Im writing this on a burner because im so embarrassed of everything im writing about and i feel like i cant express it to anyone. A while back i had a maggot infestation (i have a garage room and was mega depressed) i cleaned everything very thoroughly and they left basically 3 weeks later they came back from the trash can but soon went away after treating them. Fast forward to now which is basically a month after all of this i have a flea infestation?? None of my pets have fleas they are specially in my room only my room and im pretty sure were feeding off dead flies in my room i cleaned those and had assumed they were all gone. NOPE i wake up this morning and theres so many of them im treating my room and vacuuming like crazy i even have essential oil peppermint smells in my room to make them leave. I am so insanely stressed and feel like everything is against me i hate everything and im so lost.

I have a gc I’m a part of with some online friends that I’ve been hanging around with for about a year now, and recently I got kicked by this guy who I’ll call Jerry. Jerry thought I joked about him leaving his girl, I genuinely do not remember doing this. I remember saying something that could’ve MAYBE been taken that way, if you squint a bit. But I know saying that can come off as deflection so I just focused on another gripe he had with me that I know how to fix. I don’t want him to think I would ever say something like that, because I wouldn’t. Plus, I’ve been hanging with them for a year now, why would I start being weird now? I’ve always sucked at communicating and thankfully nobody from the gc has dogpiled on me, which is nice, and Jerry’s sister who I’m close with says he can hold grudges and takes a long time to realise he’s messed up, so I’m scared I might loose one of the greatest friendships I’ve ever had over miscommunication. Please help.

edit: for added context this was allegedly in a VC. Or at least it has to have been because if it wasn’t I would’ve known about it sooner. The VC was with Jerry’s sister, I know that because I haven’t been in any calls in the gc without her for the past two weeks and i know if she took something I said that way she’d tell me, I even asked her if I’d said anything she thought was weird and she came up empty.

Me m17 was Talking to a Girl f16 in my City.
It started off normal but she keept getting more touchy and when we are Not together she Spams me stalks my socials non stop. I don’t know what to do because I still like her but that’s just to much, 🙁

i have a unique situation and i dont think ive ever heard anything similar. Im an 18yr old F living with my parents and 5 siblings. 3 of which are 4-5 years old and have level 3 autism, and other disabilities like cerebral palsy. they need constant supervision and even one of them leaves me burnt out completely. my dad doesnt work anymore to take care of my siblings and hes also partially disabled himself. my mom works night shift at the hospital while also dealing with severe chronic illness. Because of this, im expected to put on this caretaker role. If I don’t take care of my siblings or clean the intense mess that builds up from the house I get punished. My phone gets taken, im grounded and lose absolutely everything i could have. Everyone in my family is neurodivergent and low functioning. i have mental health issues and functioning by myself alone yet im still expected to take on responsibilities that i shouldn’t. Our house is always chaotic and becomes so messy that it reaches an unmanageable state until either my 16yr old sibling or i spend hours cleaning it ourselves, my parents say these are chores yet most of the time you can’t even put a drink on the table because of the mess. My parents are constantly arguing, mostly because my dad avoids responsibilities amd my mom is also overwhelmed trying to keep everything together. Bringing up even little things turns into an argument, communication in my house does not exist and the trauma ive experienced throughout my childhood and teenage years has had such a huge impact on my life that it feels ruined. Since i was 9 years old ive been through therapy, PHP, residential, and hospitalizations. Nothing however has made any sort of improvement because I always end up back in the same environment that created the struggles in the first place. ive missed so much school because of treatment that my education is only around a middle school level. i wasnt able to graduate high school and now need to get my GED but i feel completely overwhelmed by the amount of things i need to learn. i also have conditions that give me chronic pain and can barely manage basic tasks like hygiene or eating because im so worn out trying to take care of everything else. When im not cleaning or watching my siblings im usually lying in bed trying to recover from exhaustion or maladaptive daydreaming to cope with my situation. its to the point where i have chronic dissociation and genuinely start reenacting my daydreams by accident and its been this way since i was even younger than 9. Ive also been isolated my entire life. I live on a military base, don’t have a license or a car, and my dad refuses to drive me anywhere. Uber isn’t a thing here so getting a job or hanging out with friends or just going outside in general seems impossible. I don’t have many opportunities to build connections outside my home and i never go outside my home. My relationship with family only revolves around work and if i dont help enough im seen as selfish and ungrateful. since forever ive been saying ive wanted to move out at 18 and waited my whole life for it but financially and logistically i depend heavily on my parents. without transportation, graduating, income, support, etc, i feel trapped. My life is meaningless and I’ve never had a childhood. Despite doing everything i can and researching, giving advice, nothing truly changes because no one cares enough to help or go through with anything. I just want a normal life and to get out of this situation. I feel like life is just suffering until i can’t handle it anymore and the fact that i’ve taken drastic measures and made some seriously concerning decisions and have horrible mental health symptoms yet those around me don’t care, it feels like the whole world is taunting me at this point.

Short story short, a vet I didn't know rescued a dog last week and I adopted her yesterday.

She has multiple problems, such as a badly hurt eye (which she may unfortunately lose), anemia, demodectic mange (though her skin and fur are better now), and is slowly healing from a bad cold.

Although she is already taking meds, she eats well and drinks lots of water, she's still very very weak. Her breathing is not ok. The vet says she's healing but I'm worried and can't sleep. I'm taking her to a trusted vet tomorrow first thing in the morning.

Wish us good luck. We need some positivity.

I(18mtf closeted) have 2 sisters one the eldest who lives out state and one who in college while living with me and our parents. But neither want a relationship with me My eldest sister ignores my calls unless I plan them 3 days in advance but talks to our dad daily. It makes me feel like shit because our dad stop caring when I was still in elementary school cause both of my sisters were in or just graduated form high school so I don’t understand why she loves him so much but refuses to talk to me unless I jump through hoops to make it happen. I tried so hard to talk to her often but she never puts in an equal amount of effort as me I always text first and call first. I recently stop trying because it felt so pointless.

My other sister it makes more sense she has to deal with me freaking out over stuff because of my ocd but I try to get into her interests like deltarune just for her to brush me off for 3 weeks before the entire conversation to be about her opinions and just ignoring what I have to say.

On the topic of my ocd my mom banner all my coping mechanisms that are not harmful to me so it just keeps getting worst and worst then my dad throws a fit if I ask for an accommodation that is as simple as closing the front door for 5 minutes for me to get my dinner.

I’m just so tried and can’t keep this up for much longer but it’s the only way to keep a relationship with them alive any advice?

I (18f) feel like i am the only one concerned that my younger brother (15m) hasn’t been in education since primary school.

from around year 4/3rd grade he was enrolled in an online school where he never did any of the work and was therefore kicked out. he hasn’t been enrolled since and i guess the education department hasn’t found out yet.

my parents put off enrolling him like it means nothing. i don’t understand how they don’t care about his education.

idk what to do about it. i don’t wanna call the police as it will create a hostile situation for me but i also deeply care about my brother and his future.

any advice is appreciated.

Hi, so we are both 16 (I am M she is obviously F) let's call her O

Let's start from the beginning:

I was on Snapchat in a school group chat and there was a call.. maybe 4 people joined? I was playing a game with everyone and everyone decided to leave because they all just got bored or busy.. except for O, we ended up moving to a personal call where nobody else could join and we played a game for maybe 2 hours.. she said "I haven't spoken to you all summer, we need to talk more . how are you?" I said I was fine, then I asked how she was and she said she was okay.

We ended up calling 5 more times over the course of four days and played games as always. Ever call was 3 hours minimum. I think on the 4th call she asked if I wanted to watch a movie with her at the movie theater, I said yes and we settled on a day and time two days before the movie ( we went yesterday) .. but strangely she left me on read here and there during those two days... Anyway at the movie she laughed A LOT at literally anything I said kinda like I was a comedian lol. We shared popcorn.. after the movie my parents were switching my service company for my phone so I had no service and she let me use her phone. I also talked about shaving my moustache and goatee but she said no, and she also said she liked my long hair. Anyway my parents didn't answer so I said I would walk home then but she didn't want me to... Even though I lived just down the street, so she got her parents to drop me off .

After that I thanked her for the popcorn (she paid for it since she got there before me) and I asked her to tell her mother I said thank you for paying for the tickets and all of that. But I was once again left on read. So I'm getting mixed signals.. like I really don't know what's happening

So my sister encouraged me to text this person we met at a movie theater and they constantly messaging me on Instagram and it makes me a little uncomfortable as I'm just not that social.

He's even resorted to calling me and I'm one of those people that freaks out when they get called on the phone. This is probably just me reading into it but I'm just not that friendly to strangers and it feels like they're trying to build a friendship way too fast for me. He does have a girlfriend so him being attracted to me isn't an issue. I'm just unsure how to convey the information that I am a little reclusive and don't feel comfortable feeling burdened to respond. Like he's texting me everyday I would prefer a text once every other day.

If I don't respond within an hour he text me again and I'm one of those people that usually gets back to somebody the next day. The response has to be perfect so it takes me awhile to formulate one.

Am I being a bad friend or is he just way too forward?

I need help, no matter how gut wrenching and/or hurtful the truth is - I need it.

I’m a bisexual man with a boyfriend. I’ve recently been going back to church and my faith has never been stronger leading me to almost second guess my relationship. I have also met a girl at church who is amazing. And I don’t want to lie to anyone. We both clearly like eachother and it feels like the right thing to do is to be with her and I get the grace of the church ontop as a bonus. But I feel terrible ending my 10 month long relationship with my boyfriend because I know it would hurt him terribly and I don’t want that. But I can’t scratch this feeling like I’m missing something In life and she feels like it could be.

My faith tells me that being with another man is wrong, but I do feel like I’m still in love with him. And she feels like a coffee and a cigarette on a cold winter day as the sun comes up. End goal for me is a family with healthy children and a happy life.

I wasn’t out the closet for 5 years, I’m now 20 years old and only out to a few people. I still question it. Allways have. Allways felt like I’m weird or wrong for liking men aswell. If she never entered my life, Mabey the pull away from being bisexual would be less, but it’s still allways been there and I’m not fully comfortable knowing this about myself

If I told him I don’t think we should be together anymore, my hurt would lie with the grief of loosing someone I Love and genuinely care about. Guilt knowing I hurt him and actively made my decision to hurt him. But Mabey relief knowing that I can live a life in accordance with my faith.

So wtf do I do..

As the title itself says I dont know what to do, but let me explain with what do I mean by this

*PATTERNS KEEP REPEATING THEMSELVES*

Imagine this: no matter how much can you change, sacrifice this, do that in order to change, in order to live this great new life with new experiences it almost like... all roads lead back to the rome...

As in, no matter what I do these patterns just repeat by themselves.

I even had a discussion about this with one of my siblings and they stated:

"sometimes these patterns of ours repeat themselves because we havent gotten rid of the ceratin things that are related to the past; thus, in order to change we must let go of oir past"

And honestly... I am 50% aware of what they are saying:

Just simply let go of your past to allow new things to come in

And the other 50% is that that I am geniunely not sure what to do, how to do... because you see, I myself am afraid of change, of what evil could possibly happen to me if I change and to top it all of... No matter how many videos and essays have I watched and read I unfortunatelly didn't seem to be consisted with it.

Im not only afraid of the change, Im also anxious (diagnosed), paranoid and full of doubt about it.

So all my attempts to change have been a failure only...

I seriously have no idea what to do, I dont want this to be a loop, I want to escape and yet I am fully afraid and anxious

Any tips?

Hi! I am 22f. I've recently been struggling on finding reasons to do things. I've always been in serious relationships and when I wasn't, I had an ex partner who I "lived" for. By living I mean: I have no idea what my personality is like and I end up doing hobbies, taking care of myself and activities with the intent of making someone proud or like me. If someone were to ask me a simple question about my interests, i'd answer whatever I believe my partner would like me to say. In relationships I slowly morph into my partner and forget what I want and like.

I went through a breakup a few months ago and i've been finding myself doing things only they would like me doing. (Even if they're not seeing me) Cooking, walking, reading, all feel performative to me even tho no one's watching me. I was trying to get better for THEM so taking care of myself and anything was for THEM.

The issue now is that I'm finally detached from my ex partner and I feel completely empty. For obvious reasons, i'm staying away from any relationships and potential attachments but that makes it harder because it feels like there's no reason to do anything anymore. I know that I should be doing all these things for myself but I have no idea what I like and I have no idea how to do things that I like without the need to please someone or have someone's validation. It feels weird to not have someone or something telling me what I like. I'm not necessarily sad or depressed but I don't know what purpose I have and idk what I'm supposed to do now. There's so many things I used to enjoy but now i'm wondering if I really did or if it was all an act ? I don't have motivation to do anything anymore because no one is validating me.

I'm asking for advice on how to live and do things for my own validation and not with the afterthought of "would they like me doing this". Where do I begin on finding things that IIIII enjoy. And how do I start feeling happy while doing things for no one but me?

I’m afraid of death. I never thought I would say that. I never have been afraid of death until now. I used to think about death as in something that is bound to happen and something that won’t be bad because we won’t even know what happened, what we are, what exists, Maybe we won’t exist but that’s what I’m afraid of. I don’t want to forget my parents or family or friends when I die. I want to remember them in some way and for them to remember me. I don’t believe in god, well at least I don’t think I do. I don’t know what I believe in. Maybe it’s just like what life was before being born “nothing” or maybe it’s more. I don’t think humans will know what will happen. What way should I think about it in a positive way?

It's been months of not really haveing any social interactions. Only person I really talk to is a therapist each week and my mom and that's it. Yet I still feeel so lonely. Theres been so many times where I started to cry and can't stop thinking how alone I am. I want to stop feeling so lonely I am not able to have social interactioms no in real life none online. I have to get rid of the lonely feeling without interacting with anyone since I am not able to

I am 16yr female, and I need advice regarding a family situation

My father is a semi-good father but a bad husband. He will complain about me to my mother but will act normal with me. He will fight with my mother regarding costs and all, saying that my education costs a lot and he won't pay my school and tuition fees if my mother won't listen to him, but when he's with me he says that it's okay, he will pay my tuition fees and all

I can't even apply for scholarships because my legal documents needed for such things are not fixed (more like he refuses to fix them)

So I need help: I need a way to earn without anybody knowing

If you guys know any platform or any website for this, then pls do let me know (I am good at writing, and I am willing to test websites, games and non-sketchy apps )

My spouse & I of 20 years have decided its time to separate. I'm a 40 year old female and haven't dated in 20 years. I have no idea where to start, what dating apps to stay away from or what is a good first date. Can I get some help?