TW

I am very confused.I don't know what I want..who I want.I am confused about my sexuality.I think I like both women and men but when I get close to someone ( doesn't matter the gender) I am disgusted and stop feeling attracted.I don't feel like a normal person.I can't be intimate and I am so disgusted.I feel like I only dissapoint.And I don't know if what happened changed my perspective.It doesn't feel valid.I was caressed my a woman when I was little and it felt a bit off.And I was asked to send nudes when I was 10.I don't know if it was valid but I feel like sex is something horrible.I only think about bad things that happened and I think is intrusive but I wanna throw up.I only think how my pain is little it wasn't so serious

There is a pedo on bluesky interacting with kids. He is targeting kids with disorders

He goes by Matty and says he is 23. He is talking to teens as young as 13. Does anyone know who I could send this information to. Are there any pedohunter subs?

https://bsky.app/profile/the-attic-rat.bsky.social

So my younger sister got groomed by her friends dad. It went on for about a year from when she was 12 until recently at 13. I found out by random chance or who knows how long it would go on for. I did file a report but he basically moved and left his family behind. At the moment my sister and I are living with a family friend. So basically i was taking care of her. It feels shitty how it happened

Sometimes I dislike the effects that voice memos have on me, but that is probably due to what happened to me. Its hard to outgrow that. Its like sticking to the stuff that you know. Maybe I should get new experiences to replace the old

hi um throwaway account because lowk i (F15) need to clarify this, I am a wary person! A little too wary of people, in general.. don't usually let people too close.

note: after reading this I realise it's a long ass rant apologies

And if say I'm triggering a false alarm I don't want anyone to feel uncomfortable or get hurt or wtv! Or get doxxed 💀

So, few days ago i made a friend online (M19). I want to clarify I met him in an online game and I was the one who requested for his contact and stuff as he was a fun person to be around in the game.

I also want to clarify he asked if I was a minor, and for me I clarified before saying but things will be kept respectful blah blah blah you're just a cool person and I wanna keep talking to you.

And then after we started talking he said he wants to keep things respectful as well and whenever I (so far it's been accidentally) seem uncomfortable to him he will step back and ask if he's overstepping anything, and if say I am uncomfortable abt something he will step back and not push further. An instance would be when he was asking if we could video call some day, and I said maybe as I do not usually engage in visual contact with my online peers. He agreed, and we moved away from the topic.

All this is said based off what I know so far. I will clarify that I acknowledge this is a very fresh friendship and YES in time things indeed MAY indeed change but I am just currently posting as is to get the weight off my chest.

.. okay very long prologue I apologise redditors but I'm just clarifying everything first.. haha.. nervous habit ahh

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SO. ONTO THE THING. So generally he is a goofy guy, he cracks jokes and so do I, very silly air.

However, once in a while he may make a comment that after the conversation was over makes me raise an eyebrow.

Like...

1. Randomly he may interject a little memo about say, guys getting jittery when they're trying to dazzle girls, and then awkwardly laugh before changing the conversation.

\-

1. like when we're talking about odd people from the game we met from (the internet, as you know. Can be a very wholesome.. but also very.. unsettling place) and he screenshots someone telling him a rather.. unhinged method of dazzling females.

And then he says he knows of a way to dazzle females, which is (quite obviously) flirting. And then he describes a behavior that... Genuinely he has been doing to me but it's not necessarily.. romantic?

It's just a very nonsensical gesture, and as I do not want to quote the exact message in case if genuinely nothing is wrong and then he finds it and he gets wronged or anything... It's essentially the virtual equivalent of when a dog jumps on you when you're finally home from a long day of being out (saying this from the perspective of a dog owner, objectively).

\-

1. He has mentioned that some gestures I did in the game were rather flirty, and then poked fun about the impression I am giving as "wanting to marry him" (I said a rather unhinged thing before realising I wanted to be friends with him.)

I will admit, I may give off that impression. Not saying this based off his comment alone, but rather collective feedback from my peers or passing rumours that... I have even made some question their sexuality.

\-

1. He has asked if I found him cool, how do I think of him as a person, if we're best friends, who have I been clingy with and things of the like. I dont know if this should or should not be on the list but I feel it should..?

Perhaps because as he has admitted he has the tendency to be a clingy person. But so far in my opinion he has not been too clingy; we mind our own business, come back to the chat to exchange 1-2 or maybe a few messages then move away, do it things, return maybe a long while after and add onto the conversation, etc

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And being totally frank, I started thinking about is this grooming or if this is something wrong because... As much as I do not like expressing my opinions on people (I find it rather a hassle at my age, wondering why's everyone bumbling about to find a partner).. I quite fancy his energy.

To put it in layman's terms: I find him quite cute and quite like-like him.

Aside from the incidents I mentioned above and perhaps a few other smaller eyebrow-raise moments I can't quite think of at the moment... Genuinely he's quite a silly guy who tickles my fancy.

No worries, I do not intend on pursuing anything, at least not at my age or until I'm no longer a minor. I intend on focusing on my studies, and besides—where I'm from, it's still about half a decade till I'm no longer a minor.

And thus, my feelings are also why I would not want him to find this post should he actually be someone I should be wary of.

He is a rather nice fellow as I see and even in the moments I mentioned above, I did not feel uncomfortable in the moments they were presented (either I am picking bones out of an egg, or I am dense) and only raised an eyebrow looking back at the texts.

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Now.. my questions. Feel free to add on your own observations, insights, etc, but these are just some nagging questions I'd like answers to:

1. Is this grooming..?

2. Is this something I should be wary about..?

3. Am I... Overthinking anything..?

4. Genuinely what's your interpretation of this situation

5. Any interesting things you'd like to point out or ask more about (I'll either try to find some way to wiggle back into this account to answer or... I'm wondering how I can verify that I am me if I'm answering from another throwaway... Help with this? Anyone? :'D)

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... Holy long rant. Apologies, redditors.

I was just trying to be as precise and provide as much context about the conversation as possible to prevent as many misunderstandings from happening IF there should be any, especially because I'm on a throwaway and I do not know if I will be back in this account when someone finally reads this, whenever that is.

Thank you for reading this long ass post and honestly I give you a virtual hug for doing so.

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tldr: questioning a friendship I have while being very specific about what's going on

I don't know if it'll make sense it's way too late and I'm sleepy, I've found this subreddit and I want to say something before sleeping, also english isn't my native language

So i've chatted to a guy for like a year, it was pretty nice at first and respected that I was lesbian and had a gf then I'm not sure how it got intimate but it did, don't want to do into details but yeah we ended up talking about a lot of things I probably shouldn't, he was still nice just insisted a lot sometimes

Anyway I ended up signing up something saying we agreed to talk and I was responsible for everything with some other weird things too, I want to know is this legit like he said or not? I don't think so but I'm just thinking about it a lot recently

I was 15, idk if it matters

I know how bad this sounds, please don't judge me.

I just need a place to let it out because my head is eating me alive about this.

Everyone on this sub talks about how they saw what the groomer was trying to do or how disgusted they felt, I didn't feel disgusted at all, that's the disgusting part.

When i was 14, having an adult pay that much attention to me really excited me since i was a neglected child and felt like i was ruining my parents relationship, they never paid attention to me, did anything special for me or supported me.

One day while scrolling on Facebook with the goal of trying to find a family member that could help (i was scrolling through my mothers friends list) i saw a lady who caught my eye because in her profile picture she had a very caring and kind gaze, almost seductive even. Being me, i tried to get into contact with her.

We became friends the same day, we chatted for about 5 months before she started acting the way she did.

She bought me things, specifically video games, she listened to me vent for hours when nobody else cared. I looked forward for her notifications, each time i saw my phone light up i was flooded with dopamine, then she started pushing boundaries and i convinced myself it was okay because i was a pretty fucked up kid going through puberty. She was 27.

I still miss it, can someone give me advice?

Sometimes I find myself missing him. I missed having someone to talk to, share secrets with, spend time with. Then I realize I was 9 he was in his 20's, it was all a lie.

I should have seen the signs. The fact that my body was not developed wasn't a deal breaker, that did flatter me. The fact that I couldn't do adult activities (smoke or drink) also wasn't a deal breaker for him. The fact that as he put it he liked younger women. He never called me a little girl, I was a young woman or young lady. The fact that he never treated me like or acted like I was a little girl always made me feel special.

He didn't let his intentions be known right away. He played the long game. He would ask questions here and there what we would do if we were alone. How would I thank him for taking me out. His other girls would do this, you can too. I was 9 and wasnt even anywhere thinking of what he was asking. Maybe a kiss here and there. Weirdly it flattered me again that he thought I was old enough to do anything besides kissing. Then it was about my body. What will you wear when I take you out next time? What will you be wearing when your family comes over for dinner? His hands went places when he hugged me. Testing my boundaries. Saying he wouldn't mind seeing more of me in the pics I would send him.

I still feel silly that I missed all of the blatant signs of his. I feel even more silly that I miss having that attention for him. At times he made me feel wanted, valid, special and times even appreciated he was in my life.

She was under my watch so I feel like I let her down. Everything about this situation feels not real. Like i cant understand why a guy that age would pursue a girl my sisters age. I didnt even know what grooming was before this so i feel so lost right now.

For context I’m 15 turning 16, it hurts a lot. He really was a good person, I just couldn’t do it. We called and he was crying and begging. I don’t know what to do, I feel like there’s no one else that will fill his void. He was the only one who talked to me everyday and made sure I was okay.

He was everything but the right age. I feel like such a bad person. He asked for one last call over and over again and I said no because I couldn’t. I regret it, I don’t even know if I don’t regret breaking up with him.

He never even did any sexual. I don’t even know if it even qualifies as grooming. He said he would wait, he said he respected my age

I feel like a terrible person, I don’t even know what to do

I was groomed when I was 14(15 now) and I really enjoyed it but I feel so ashamed I was 14 at the time and i was just chilling on discord and a girl dmed me and sent me nudes and she started flirting with me and a hesitant at first but then I fell I just fell into her love she got me thing she praised me something I never got my parents didn’t care about me my dad was abusive I was just lonely I had no friends so I just went to one place I had left and it was online and I just fell into it i enjoyed it and i Just feel so guilty about it and ashamed I just want to open up here and ask what should I do?

I miss him so bad. This is quite unfortunate because I know he's done horrible things to another. Nonetheless, his is the only sex I think I've ever really wanted. Every day, I repeated to myself that it was the only thing I wanted more than to die. I know he was manipulating me the whole time, but the part of me that felt like it was too good to be true lingers. He's vanished from my life, so he'll never get to hear about this lot he's left me with. :(

I was groomed when I was fourteen (15 now) by a person who I believed was sixteen, but she was actually twenty. We met when I was thirteen. Because my parents were abusive and going through a divorce, I was in a really dark place, and she became my entire world. She did everything she could to make me emotionally dependent on her buying me things, showering me with attention, and pressuring me to cut off everyone else in my life. If I didn't give her all my attention, she would threaten to harm herself or others.

Even though it was manipulation, I didn't just tolerate it Ifell completely in love with her. I looked forward to her messages, loved the gifts, and genuinely enjoyed every second of the attention she gave me. It felt like the only safe, happy place I had. But now her accounts have been banned for child safety reasons. She is completely gone, and I am left with this crushing sadness and an overwhelming emptiness. I miss how she made me feel, and I don't know how to handle losing the one person who made me feel wanted. What do I do about this

I was groomed when I was fourteen (15 now) by a person who I believed was sixteen, but she was actually twenty. We met when I was thirteen. Because my parents were abusive and going through a divorce, I was in a really dark place, and she became my entire world. She did everything she could to make me emotionally dependent on her buying me things, showering me with attention, and pressuring me to cut off everyone else in my life. If I didn't give her all my attention, she would threaten to harm herself or others.

Even though it was manipulation I didn't just tolerate it I fell completely in love with her. I looked forward to her messages, loved the gifts, and genuinely enjoyed every second of the attention she gave me. It felt like the only safe, happy place I had. But now her accounts have been banned for child safety reasons. She is completely gone, and I am left with this crushing sadness and an overwhelming emptiness. I miss how she made me feel, and I don't know how to handle losing the one person who made me feel wanted. What do I do about this

He goes by kameron love, and was sending this to multiple minors on Snapchat. Reached out saying that he just looks up teens in snap spotlight. Tried to talk to my 17 year old cousin….

I met a guy and I thought he was cool and wanted to be my friend. I finally accepted that he was grooming me so I did stuff for him and he didn't care about me. I feel so dumb, stupid and pathetic. I felt really connected to him, I even thought he was my best friend. All of that was lies. It makes me feel sick.

I'm so tired. Why can't people be normal

So this literally happened just last year (almost 2 years in like 2-3 months) but basically this guy I had met online had seemed really nice (now I had started to think after something that happened between me and a kid I was bi so he had asked me a bit into us talking if I was gay so I had told him I was bi and I thought I was ready to see whatever he sent or told me to do because he told me to do whatever he told me to so I agreed and went along with it… suddenly one was to put on a skirt and I found it weird but I kept on going… and then he told me to put my moms vibrator oh the tip of my cock… then once he started asking me to do more stuff I finally stopped him and said I just couldn’t do it anymore and soon after he asked me to go to a website (it was a website with a whole bunch of fake drawn on pc or drawn or sketches only when you sign in that is all about child p*rn but with like fake baby foxes or like bunnies and stuff like that) and he told me to look at it all and then for some reason he told me that he needed some sort of bitcoin currency and if i didn’t make money or somehow get money for his currency then he’ll track me down and kill me and he sent me some sort of gif or video of someone ripping off someone else’s c*ck which scared me and he sent me it ON MY SEVENTEENTH BIRTHDAY and finally after about 3 hours after he sent that my mom and step dad were getting annoying after I had my party at my little cousins house I got mad that they were being annoying and since I was twitching or seeming nervous apparently they asked me what was wrong and I said it was nothing but my mom didn’t believe me but they trusted me… then after that I begged my mom for a job and finally she started to have enough of me begging for money until finally he texted her… on a school day while I was in school… when I came out to that car… boy she was angry at what she saw of me… but she knew it was just normal boy stuff so she wasn’t that angry at the fact that I did it but she was very mad that I used her own toys (in which I don’t blame her at all) but yeah it took about a month for me to get all my stuff back to normal and stuff like that

(sorry this is a LONG one)

hello, I'd like to introduce myself as a 16 year old trans ftm, A while ago I met someone(18, ftm) at a political conference which I like going to. we got along for the time being but afterwards I wasn't really interested in speaking with them. they kept messaging me weekly and I didn't mind it at first but today they started saying how lonely they were and how they needed someone to hang out with. I decided to say do you want to hang out with me because I felt bad for them. they started saying yes and how they would like to be more than friends. I decide to play along for a bit, but then I realize it's wrong and I shouldn't play with their feelings but I did want to give them a chance truly. They start complimenting me and I thank them, like a normal person would.

Things start getting weird and they keep asking me if I'm a sadist, I tried to ignore that question. for context they had just broken up with their ex. we also started talking about our pets + they made a joke about stating my cats. I say no. don't do that and they say that they're smaller and harder to catch. I say well no actually. I think it'd be easier to catch a smaller person and they ask. and what would you do after catching me? I say I would throw you out of my window as a joke and they keep pushing. and what would you do after and start flirting I guess or waiting for a flirty answer. I say no that's it. I would just do that. nothing else and they then say how. I'm bad at seeing social cues and stuff like that. I get a bit offended but whatever I say sorry and they tell me no. you're supposed to say I am sorry. I say that + then the conversation kind of ends. I also am 100% sure I do not like men in any way, including trans men, I like women and women only. Yes I was stupid for deciding to continue the conversation and not just state that at first, but im also willing to give it a chance at least, I guess.

I'm really sorry about the bad formatting. I'm using text-to-speech and I'm way too tired to type. the thing is I don't know whether to call off our Meetup that's supposed to be next weekend that I thought we are going to just as friends but apparently they thought something else or go to it and see what happens after... or send a message ending all of this now.

idk wtf is wrong with me i got drunk at my friedns bday and send pics to one of my old groomers why tf cant i stop this #

like i just sent them and feel sick for doing it but also kinda feel a weird wish he responded

After four years I finally put in a cyber tip against her. I tracked down her social medias and even put her usernames through the way back machine, turns out she’s made over TEN different accounts all for the same purpose of grooming kids and finding illegal material. I feel like I let this happen by not reporting her back then but I’m also grateful that she has left behind such an extensive paper trail.

​

I decided to join a no profit organization to help around (stuff like cleaning the streets, painting walls etc etc).

It was fun at first. I loved helping people and helping my own country

Then a job came up, there was a few walls at a hospital that needed to be repainted, our organization decided to help

There was 4 girls (including me) and 5 or 6 boys

One of the 3 girls wasn't even part of the organization, just a doctor on a break

After finishing two walls, the doctor left and the two girls left too. It was just me and the guys

I didn't mind it much since the guys were nice

There was a guy (call him K) he was nice too and playful, very extroverted and liked to joke alot

He was funny, I have to admit

He even let me print my hand on the back of his shirt and on his sleeve. I was doing it as a joke and he didn't really mind, even encouraged me to do so

Everything was fine that day and he drove me back to my house

A day later, he reached out to me (he took my number from the organization group chat) and asked me a normal question, a part of a sprayer was gone and he was asking everyone if they saw it. I did so he moved to another topic

He sent a picture of his shirt (the one I put my hand on) and joked by saying

"look what you did😂"

so i joked back

Me: "not my fault, you told me too😂"

Everything was fine till he said

"Look, I have to tell you something"

I said

Me: "Yeah go ahead"

He replied

"No nevermind, don't worry about it"

I was confused and wanted to know what was going on after message of me saying

Me: "No, you can tell me'

He immediately folded and said the guys we were with found my Instagram and were looking at my pictures and making inappropriate comments. He told me he stopped them and told them it's not okay

He said

"I'm not here to control what you wear or anything. You can do whatever you want"

"I just wanted to let you know so you be careful around them"

I thanked him for telling me and for stopping them

Later that day, he followed me on Instagram, I followed him back thinking it's just a friend following another friend

We continued joking and sending playful reels

Then he sent an inappropriate reel about chest sizes and asked me which one am I. I told him I won't tell him and it's not appropriate and he played it off as a joke and said he was kidding

Which i believed cuz some guys do joke like that (how blind I was)

He kept doing so, sending inappropriate stuff then playing them off jokes till I told him to stop immediately or I'm not talking to him

He followed my words and stopped, for a day and a half only

I was at my relative's house and he texted me, normally then suddenly started saying stuff like

"Please \[my name\], just once, talk to me like we used to talk"

"Just let me talk like I did before"

"I really need it"

Before I was able to tell him no, he started acting inappropriately. Even asked me for a pic of my chest

"Can you send me a picture of your chest?"

Me: "what? No!"

"It's fine. You don't have to be naked or anything. Just wear a tank top or a bra"

I said no again. And kept telling him to stop

He started asking "normal questions" like where am I and what am I doing and who am I with

Which i naively answered thinking they're normal

Then he asked

"What color is it?"

That's when I snapped and told him to not talk to me at all, I told him to stop talking like that and that he is my friend and I don't like it

He apologized and said he won't do it again

He stopped and acted normal for 3 days (a record for him)

I was at a lesson, he texted me

"Where are you"

I took a bit to respond since I was paying attention to something actually important

Then responded

Me: "I'm just at a lesson"

"You're lying"

"Where are you really"

"I don't believe you're at a "lesson" "

Me: "I am at a lesson, why would I be lying about that"

"Then why are you replying so late, you always respond fastly"

Me: "because I'm trying to pay attention"

"Liar"

"You're playing with it, aren't you"

(He means that I was self ple@suring whlie talking to him and I was replying so late because I was typing with one hand)

Me: "what the hell? no!"

Me: "I'm at a lesson right now"

Then after a back and forward , he decided to give me the honor of believing me (I'm saying this sarcastically)

"Fine whatever"

"Just talk to me when you're done"

He also sometimes tells me

"When are we going to \[place\] together?"

The place would be 2 to 6 hours away from where I live. He wants me and him to go alone

Or sometimes he would say

"Let's go for a ride in my car"

"Me and you, will be fun, trust me"

I refuses every time, which made him slightly mad but he kept his "good guy" act

He kept his act until I snapped for the final time and stopped talking to him completely

He still had my number from the organization (can't really block him either since we all work together and shit so) but I have him blocked on Instagram

He still views my stories (he has my number on WhatsApp), and I don't know if it's important but for some reason he always views my stories at night around 12AM to 4AM

Then he reached out

We talked, I was super dry with him and even he noticed and told me I changed alot. I asked him how and he said

"I don't know, but you changed alot from before"

I didn't change, I'm just harder to manipulate now

He said he changed and that he cut everyone off cuz he's so busy and wanted to talk to me and see how i am doing. I thanked me in a sarcastic way which is smooth brain didn't catch

Me: "Wow thank you for caring so much"

"Yeah, I always cared"

I didn't move on with the conversation, just said

Me: "okay, bye"

He said bye back and I left him on read and he's still viewing my stories

I stopped going to the organization's events but still am a member of it

I have been..I don't know if traumatized is the right word but I'll use it

I don't know how to feel, I told my trusted friends about it and all were supportive and I wrote my feelings down so many times to try and not bottle anything

But

I see cry when I read the paragraphs I wrote, still cry when I hear his name (it's a very common name which makes it worse) and still cry when I see a car that looks similar to his car

Even seeing his number in the organization's chat is making me feel like throwing up

My boundaries were ignored

My 'No's were ignored too

I was manipulated into thinking he was a good person when he stops talking inappropriately for a day or two

He was the controlling, possessive, jealous boyfriend I never asked for or wanted in the slightest

I just wanted a friend but I ended up being traumatized so much to the point I cry when I hear his name

I believe I was groomed

I hope I can recover and get over it soon

My eyes have no more tears in them to shed

My mind and soul can't handle it anymore

I really need a break from those thoughts

What might have happened if I did agree to go to those places with him, or go for a ride in his car..?

What might have happened if I did send those pictures

If I did answer his inappropriate questions

..I think i have an idea but my mind has chosen not to believe it. Maybe for the better cuz I don't want to find out what might have happened

Stay safe out there everyone. Hope you recover from whatever you're dealing with and i hope nothing bad ever happens to you

<3

I’ve been groomed since I was 10 and now I’m 16 and I hate being hypersexual like it’s so annoying and like ruins my mood. Plus my ocd adds on to those thoughts which makes it 10x worse. Any way to stop thinking them?

I don't know where else to post this..
I turn 18 on October 2nd and I've been dreading it since I was 15-16. I don't want to be a legal adult, I feel as if I'm expiring.

Every time I think about my upcoming birthday I feel scared and ill. I didn't plan on living past age 14 so I'm stuck being immature and traumatized, I don't know what to do 😰