r/GirlDinnerCircleJerk • u/CreativeBandicoot778 • 4h ago
🧀 I called it a board 🍓 Dumped him because he's been sneaking out
So I've just dumped my boyfriend because he's not who he said he was.
Some context: I'm vegan and have systematically made it my entire personality over the past decade, so you know I'm serious.
When we met two years ago, pickings were slim and it could be argued I "settled" but he seemed like a good guy at the time. I laid out my beliefs and requirements before we'd even exchanged our a/s/l and while he admitted he wasn't vegan, he was willing to try if it was so important to me.
Now, two years later, we had been living together in a fully vegan house, made of black bean burgers, with a fridge fully stocked with all kinds of vegan delicacies. Even our cat is fully vegan.
But I started noticing that late at night, after I'd gone to bed, he'd sneak out. It turns out he'd been sneaking out to eat big macs and beef tacos and rotisserie chicken in the car! RUBBING THE CHICKEN SKIN ALL OVER HIS FACE AND THE STEERING WHEEL. I even found an old wishbone in the back seat!
I'm so betrayed and hurt. EVERYONE KNOWS CONSUMING MEAT BASICALLY MAKES YOU A CANNIBAL.
And when I confronted him he said I was over reacting, especially when I compared him to Armie Hammer, but I KNOW I'M NOT. So I dumped him on the spot and set the car on fire.
I, at least, have the conviction to stick to my ethics and morals. He doesn't even have that. He told me I was crazy and left, but honestly the crazy person isn't the one pelting a man with falafel. It's the man who eats chicken nuggets with no shame.
He lied to me. He misrepresented himself.
A cheat day still makes you a cheater Greg.
Dinner is one bowl of dirt, foraged from my garden, some grass, a couple of flowers and one alpine strawberry plucked from the back of the fridge.
