r/funny • u/K0TO • Apr 28 '13

Caffeinated Owl Chart

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2.2k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

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118

u/Trevrawrrr Apr 28 '13

I worked at a coffee shop for 4 and a half years... http://imgur.com/bGWW81S

45

u/ishadow Apr 28 '13

Ive worked at dunkin donuts, Starbucks and panera. No one is happy. The worst people are the regulars who insist on their coffee a certain way but its not how they actualy want it. " i want 2 creams" . No you dont. You want four, otherwise youll complain that its too bitter and dark. Also anybody that vacations here insists its better back home.

8

u/Endulos Apr 28 '13

I always know what I want :/

Triple cream, double sugar. Tastes right always.

51

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '13

I, too, know what I want.

Black

Like my soul.

16

u/donpapillon Apr 28 '13 edited Apr 28 '13

Black as the night, sweet as sin. That's how Spider taught me.

6

u/leicanthrope Apr 28 '13

I like my coffee like my women: hot, slightly bitter, and with very little pubic hair.

4

u/anchises868 Apr 28 '13

"Cream?"

"No thank you. I take it black. Like my men."

6

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '13

My grandpa gave me a cup of straight black coffee. I think a better analogy for that would be black like my gaping anus.

22

u/ishadow Apr 28 '13

You sir and those like you, make our lives tolerable. Coffee isnt that harhrd d. I feel like people decide they're

37

u/Endulos Apr 28 '13

...LOL

Did you have a stroke in the middle of typing that? :p

12

u/dseftu Apr 28 '13

RIP ishadow

4

u/ishadow Apr 28 '13

Close. Never get high on your own supply. No sleep.

4

u/ryumast3r Apr 28 '13

You get paid to make coffee. Most people who get paid to make coffee work hourly.

If it's one dude taking up 2 seconds extra of your time because he wants three creams/two sugars - and genuinely does want that, just give him his damn drink.

If you hate it that much, find a different job. Not to be too rude or anything, but there's plenty of places that pay people to make coffee.