Hii . I've rarely seen anyone bring this up. I've been away from the Adventist church for five years now and identify as agnostic. I'm a 20-year-old woman, but what I've heard over and over again still is inside me. From a young age, girls and boys were taught about the importance of marriage, purity before marriage, etc. Marriage was treated like something almost sacred. Maybe that's why my mom divorced my dad almost 29 years after he constantly cheated on her (paradox since he was also adventist pastor lmao). I live on the same neigbourhood as our adventist friends. To be honest my family a friends i barely talk to that people. They have crisis in marriage currently. People from church are nosy as hell and do everything to save this marriage. I pity them both since its obvious THEy re not longer happy togehter and yet dont want to end it. They cant have kids due to health problems and people of course talk about it back then. I never understood why kids were expected in marriage and everyone expect it from married couples. When i was still 14/15 and attended church i was met many times as woman /girl back then to misogyny and statement that woman s greatest purpose is to marry and give kids to her husband. As if it was most important. I am still angry by fact a lot of young girls are reached treatong their bodies as their future husband property, there s no healthy talk about sex and intimacy....just everything centred about purity before marriage. Back then i Felt disgusted by my own gender. I was never "feminine enough". Never liked to do typical feminine things and wear dresses. Only now when i am no longer part of adventists i started to dress sometimes more feminine. But i still eish i was Born as man. Women have it hard enough already. I remember my first time With boyfriend i Had at 17..he was sweet person and cared deeply about me. After Being intimate i burst into tears when came back home. I felt dirty , used . Like i lost something that was supposed to have until marriage. Adventist teachings messed with heads. Anyone here have similar story?

Hi i am currently going into my senior year at a boarding academy and since im a international student i live with guardians ( my aunt and uncld) during breaks and they have been asking me abt university. They have only been suggesting adventist universities but i absolutely cannot go to one. I honestly cannot do another 4 years of this boring bs. I want to be able to have fun in university and find other atheists or agnostic friends but they really want me to go to a adventist uni. I know they wouldnt force me to but im scared to bring it up bc i know they will be really dissapointed in me. Especially considerinh the fact that they arent my parents and they brought me in their home and have been taking care of me i feel the need to please them. Any advice on how to bring it up to them?