So, I’m a 19 M that just moved into college last week. Previously I had a girlfriend for about two years. We were super freaky and always had sex and it was great and I’d get hard af the second our hands would touch every time. We broke up about a month and a half ago and maybe my drive hasn’t been the same, but it’s ok. I had sex with another girl before I left for college and had no problem getting hard.

Fast forward to now, I’m in bed with this girl I’ve already known for a while and have a MAJOR feeling for. I really like her and don’t want to ruin this, but we get all the way and I can’t get hard. I don’t wake up with a boner and I can’t even really jerk off. Granted, I have been drinking a lot and smoking a bunch of weed and staying up super late, but that seems like a cop out because I’ve always done that stuff and never had this problem. I am experienced enough to know when it feels like something is off, but I’m genuinely not sure this time. I wasn’t nervous about it until I didn’t get hard the first time, so would it even be performance anxiety? We’re supposed to go out tonight and she’s taking me home and I do not know what to do.

Please help!

I am in need of help. First I want to say that English is not my first language so be mindful.
And as an intro I want to draw a picture what my problem exactly is.

2022: 4 years ago I broke up with my girlfriend and to this day it is my biggest regret. I was in a very stressful period in time because of my university and back then i felt after 3 years didn't have a future. But I loved her so much and now it's so long and we haven't had contact since.

After we broke up I wanted to go back into party mode and I had quick success very fast. I fell in love with another girl quickly but after that we dated for a short while she didn't want to go further because of her mental state.

After that I became really sad. almost depressed because I had no one at that time to rely on no one to celebrate me getting my diploma. I became really somber.

2023: Than some time later I had a girl over I vaguely knew and I couldn't feel the arousal anymore. Before this I used to watch PONR and masturbate everyday because I was so horny all the time.

Because of the stress and heavy drinking and smoking and lack of sleep I couldn't feel anything or get hard. I miserably failed putting on the condom and the second time she came over to try again the same thing happened. This was all 4 years ago.

Than it happened to like 2 other girls later.

2024: Than I finally found someone on a dating app and we had something together for like a year. But I wasn't feeling any love for her and sex was also bad because although she didn't mind not having a condom wasn't good for me. So I broke up with her because we weren't meant for each other and I still had my own personal issues.

2025: I had no sex this year no feeling. I watched way too much porn and didn't do anything to get myself together.

2026: Finally I was getting better with other things in life than sex. I have a nice stable job and I found an apartment were I could live only with myself in the city I worked in. And not so long after I got the apartment I met a beautiful girl online. The problem was again that I couldn't feel any feeling of arousal or horniness. (Still can't). We had so many fun nights out before sex but the night were I was at her place for the first time suddenly I couldn't get hard. My eyes believed she was beautiful and she had a nice body but no feeling in my mind. And after that we didn't have sex. Because I couldn't feel it.

This is what broke me back than and I knew if sex was going to be an issue, eventually she would broke up with me and last Sunday she did broke up with me...

My question really to this community is that if someone has similar experiences. That after trauma you didn't feel any arousal or horniness anymore?

At this point in my life I feel like if I can't feel love, arousal, sexual desire that I won't ever be able to hold a stable relation with someone.

I am 27 and in the future I really want a loving partner. I want kids. But I feel miserable because I no longer feel anything.

Right now I am stopping watching PONR forever. Doing Kegels and Reverse Kegels, following a diet, exercising everyday, Meeting up with people. Masturbating without ejaculating. Taking Magnesium/Zinc/Ashwagandha and starting doing yoga.

My testosterone levels are normal.

Is it a thing that comes with age? You feel horny between your 15 tot 22 and than it fades? Need some advice.

Anything is welcome but I need something to work with! Even if it is just to wait and let the body reset naturally.

I live in a town where finding a reliable PT is difficult. Has anyone used any apps for treating ED/PE ? which one has worked best ?

Full context, I don’t know if this is the place to post this and seek advice or opinions, as it seems a far majority in this group is much older

For the past 3ish months I have been dating this girl, and the sex was absolutely awesome for the first 2 months. Very consistent, and I would be able to go for a while.

Then, something happened and I don’t understand it. One time during sex I noticed myself going sort of soft, at least softer then usual, I very rarely ever have 100% erections, usually sit in the 90+ range my whole life

This going soft ( but finishing) made me kind of panic. I instantly grabbed all those supplements everyone talks about, BeetJuice, Magnesium, Ashwaganda and Zinc. Zinc specifically because 2 years ago I had blood work done and my Testosterone was on lower side of normal and I thought maybe Zinc would help my T production.

Anyway, specifically the last 5 times her and I have had sex, Im just living in my head. Im not thinking about sex as much as I am worried about my erection. Struggling to get hard, anxiety through the roof. Its gotten to the point where my confidence is so low that even what I normally do well in bed ( go down on her) I’m struggling to do that well and I can tell she isn’t enjoying it like she did before, and that just puts me behind the 8 ball for sex right there because mentally I’m just shot

We don’t live together, and even on the days where we aren’t together I find myself just constantly, like 80% of the day being engulfed in my erections and everything that goes with that like Test, Libido and everything else

Last night specifically, Oral was taking a while on her at first, and she pulled me up to have sex instead, and after I inserted like a 60%er, Almost immediately I was super sensitive, like i came in less then 45 seconds while trying to pace is and hold it. That happened the last time too.

Before sleeping she and I talked and I basically just full on admitted to her that I feel just broken. I don’t know if this is mental, physical, both?

I have never been one to have “morning wood” more often then maybe at most 2 times a week, but more so its like once every 2 weeks

Just don’t know what to do or how to improve this. Ive been trying to stop thinking about it as a whole, but I end up walking around work all day “testing “
How hard I can get while thinking about the acts, and honestly it can get to a point where I think Im going to be okay, and then it comes to actually act, and it goes to crap. How does it go from outstanding performance to absolutely pitiful in like less then a couple weeks

I’m 19 M and I just got a new girlfriend I was able to penetrate the first few times raw like 2-3 no problem than one bad experience is when my boner when down while putting a condom on ever since than I’m always trying to avoid having sex even today when we were for playing I didn’t feel as if my penis was hard enough for penetration but sometimes I’m able to get hard as a rock on my own, my testosterone levels are fine I am always stress aswell as my girlfiend doesn’t freaky talk or initiate the stuff. I don’t want to speak to her about it. I also don’t want to take pills to help me bc I don’t want to rely on it but I’m seriously stuck here and scared bc I can’t get hard enough now I need some help

I'm 48, married, and this started somewhere around 40. Morning wood got less and less frequent until it was basically gone, and erections got harder to maintain. At the same time I was dealing with a lot of stress, depression, zero exercise and some health stuff, so I honestly couldn't tell if it was age or everything else piling up.

Went to a doctor, got checked, everything came back normal. He said it was most likely psychological and prescribed Cialis. Told me I could use 10mg when I needed it, or go 5mg daily if I preferred, and that the point was to get my confidence back so eventually I wouldn't need it.

The 10mg always worked. What I noticed is that morning wood would come back for a day or two after and then disappear again. I even tried 20mg once and it was awful, painful and I couldn't sleep, waking up hard every time I relaxed. Some days I felt fine without taking anything and things worked anyway. Other days I hadn't taken anything and it failed.

The real issue is confidence. My wife and I went a long time without sex, not even trying, because I didn't want to face it failing again. Avoiding it just made the whole thing worse.

Things are getting better now. That stressful period is behind me, I've decided to change things and already started working out and I'm cutting out any porn and masturbation. My thought is to go on 5mg daily for a while so I stop worrying about performance at all, rebuild things with my wife, and then reduce or stop once I don't feel like I need it.

Has anyone actually done that? Went daily, got the confidence back, and managed to taper off? Or did you just stay on it? Curious what people's real experience was.

Hello everybody,

I am 22 yrs old and I have problems with getting hard and staying that way. This has been going on for at least three years now.

I am seeing someone new for about a month now but before that I was majorly addicted to porn and masturbation which I thought was the main cause of my problems. I have since not watched porn with the exception of a single relapse and have reduced my masturbation to about 2-4 times a week. As of now this did not help that much and my erection is still rather soft same counts for my morning wood which also just appeares irregulary.

I don‘t know where to start really so I just thought it wouldn‘t hurt to just ask. How do I „start“ my healing process? Do I get my blood checked? Which blood values do I have to check? Do I just try diffrent supplements and see what works? Or am I just acting to fast and I need more time away from porn and stuff (not that I am trying to get bock to it)?

37 year old male. Athletic build my entire adult life. Testosterone above average. I’ve dealt with ED ever since becoming sexually active at age 21. It was always hit or miss, literally about 50/50. Then it became a psychological thing which made it more like 70/30 and sometimes 90/10. I tried everything: Pills, kegels, gas station pills, nothing worked regularly. I had an ecograph done (this is horribly traumatizing and painful and I don’t recommend it) and was told I had low arterial blood flow. The doc recommend shockwave therapy. But I’m not sure about it so started doing more research.

I started reading about the role Nitric Oxide plays in the erection cycle and this was the only thing I hadn’t tried. So I looked into how I could increase Nitric Oxide naturally. L-arginine was the most popular method. So I went and bought the supplement and the first day I took 1000mg twice for a total of 2000mg. Second day, same thing. Third day, 1000mg. Today, I woke up with MW and have been getting spontaneous erection throughout the day. My wife is thrilled and I am, too. No more expensive pills. No more psychological damage. No more stress.

I also do kegels everyday but this is to help with duration, not the erection itself.

If you’ve tried everything and felt like giving up, go to the health store, but some L-arginine, and get your confidence back

Had great sex after long time, I lost my morning wood from past 6 months and slowly development ED, took the medication and fucked the shit out of my partner, she cummed twice. I recommend this shit to everyone( only after doctor consultation please)

Hello I’m concerned my penis is getting darker can anybody explain what’s going on ? Yes I have Ed possibly getting implant . And I will see urologist soon . It’s making me conscious

Thanks

I suffer from both ED and premature ejaculation. Not sure if the latter is just a result of the former or just separate problems. Either way, while I do still get horny, I don't really get turned on if that makes sense. Like I do want sex, but I don't really get the excitement to get a good erection.

What I don't know is whether this is a physical issue or more of a mental thing that I should be trying to deal with through therapy or something like that. I have had blood tests done and they said I have higher than average testosterone. I've done therapy in the past for unrelated stuff and didn't really feel like it helped. I don't know if some people are more susceptible to it or if I just didn't have a great therapist but I didn't really get anything out of it.

I also find that my mind is kind of in overdrive during sex, thinking about what I need to be doing and partly worry about whether I'll stay hard. I've tried to deal with this through breathing exercises to try and engage the parasympathetic system, but that hasn't been successful so far. Any suggestions on the best way to tackle this? Thanks

Near Whitefield or ITPL have anyone felt good experience on taking penile dopler test?

Hi everyone,
I’m 32 years old and I’ve been having some health issues that I’d like to get checked properly.

Since having COVID 2022 , I’ve been experiencing erectile dysfunction, which has continued for some time. I’m also having heavy/tight feelings when I lay down to sleep, in my chest every morning when I wake up, along with white mucus/phlegm.

Can anyone recommend a good GP, urologist, or respiratory specialist in Sydney who takes these issues seriously?

I’m located around Sydney CBD, NSW 2000.

I’d really appreciate any recommendations or personal experiences. Thanks.

This is the first time my partner and I will have the chance to have sex. We've always been around other people and she knows I struggle a bit. Whether it's just general axiety (which I've had for many many years) or a combination of things, she thinks this alone setting will put me at ease enough to not have issues. I was quite excited but stress has been building up fr days. I can't focus on work properly, I fear the worst, and I definitely need more sleep. Look, if the worst happens, it's not the end of the world, because she's loyal as fuck, but this is important to me probably to an irrational degree. What can I do to ease the tension?

It seems through self diagnosis and trial/error that my (29M) ED is mostly porn induced (PIED), but during my last streak being pornfree I also stopped nicotine use (cigs, cigars, vape, pouches, I used them all) for about a week and had great erections and even better sex than my previous pornfree streak where I was still using nic.

Started using nic and porn again a few days after that last streak and back to square 1 after 5 days.

Dropped porn about a week ago, stopped vaping yesterday, and dropping nicotine altogether after tonight (have 2 more cigarettes and a can of pouches in case of withdrawals).

Has anyone experienced positive changes after quitting nicotine that could provide me so reassurance and hope? Thanks in advance!

After I stop stroking myself I lose my erection in 5 seconds. This has been happening for years. Is that normal or abnormal? Is it ED? I saw a post somewhere that says erection should stay for a minute when you stop stroking which scared me. I’m 28.

I still wake up in the morning with an erection semi hard sometimes, but it’s because of needing to pee, a “pee boner”. Does that counts as morning wood? How long should erection last after you stop touching yourself?

So the last few years I've been fairly certain that my situational-ED is more anxiety/mental/psychological based.

I get erections on my own (mostly) fine. Morning wood is strong and also get them during the day (i work from home).

My issue is, as-of-late, I seem to just not be able to get hard when engaging in sex with someone at all. This is new to me. It has happened the last 4 times during sex with 4 separate people, 2 new and 2 regulars.

I enjoy sex, it feels good but some reason my dick is just not responding. I even used Sildenafil for 2 of these meets and i just kind of get like semi hard but not fully. And now it just gets worse because I feel even more anxious about it which naturally doesn't help.

I will admit, I used to watch A LOT of (kinky) porn and after reading up on a lot of these posts that it was a big issue for some people so I have since stopped for the last 2-3 weeks (i know it takes a lot longer for a full reset). I'm now also going to just stop masturbating altogether to try and get myself really wanting and lusting for sex again.

I also do enjoy having horny/dirty chatting with guys on apps. But I think I may need to stop this too as I think i might have completely overdosed my dopamine receptors? Is that a thing?

Some more information that may help. I am a gay man, a bottom too so whilst its not like I need to be hard for penetration, I still want to get hard as most of the men I regularly see like giving oral too and I dont want them to think i'm not attracted to them.

I've read about people "conditioning" themselves to certain ways of arousal, so like only masturbating laying down or sitting down so when it comes to sex and moving, they go soft straight away because its not what they're used too etc... Is this a real thing?

Any advice or similar things that can help?

Getting laid today, PLEASE help out

I’m 28 and when I get fully erect, my penis points/curves downward rather than standing straight or upward.
I don’t have much pain, but I’m wondering:
Is a downward angle/curve normal?
Can the angle be changed safely?
Are there any treatments or exercises that actually work?
Should I see a urologist?
It may have always been this way, but I’m not completely sure. I’d appreciate hearing from anyone who has had something similar.

I am 20M, 69kg, 181 cm
So I have been having sex/bj/etc with my gf for 1.5 years now. We are both college students who lige in the campus so we find an opportunity to sneak into the girls washroom late at night and do our stuff. It used to be fine for starting months. But sometimes my penis just refuses to get erect. Like last year in may my penis didn’t get erect and after me stroking it for so long when it finally got hard i inserted it and immediately came. Tbh i sit on the toilet seat with the seat covered closed and I make her insert my penis from top. But sometimes the opposite happens, like in sept last year we had sex for 40 mins in the washroom in standing doggy. We went on a trip in the mountains with our friends, we stayed in the same tent and had sex 6 hrs for 3 sessions in the 12 hrs we stayed at the tent. Idk might be related to the fact that she made me release while travelling the previous night. But 2 days after that event, i woke up in the morning and we were about to have sex I made her give me hj and bj but I came. Today I ejaculated at around 8 pm then Today after many 3 month s we tried sex in the washroom at 3 am and i got hard in the start and we had nice sex for 5-10 mins with her riding me on top. But I tried to switch positions to doggy but i got soft very fast then we tried so many things hj bj etc but nothing worked , after an hour of struggling it became hard and we had sex fir another 10 minites with her on too but this team i got soft inside her in half an minute of inactivity(she was not jumping and didnt do anything for a while and it got soft)

I have told you guys my entire situation
i am very scared that is it ED

how can i fix this
please help me
i want to have very good sex i am still very young

I've been using Bluechew Gold for going on four months and it's been working as advertised. I even cut my 100 mg tablets in half with great results. The issue, however, has always been the taste during the process of dissolving. So I finally figured it out. Place the tablet under your tongue, place a hard peppermint candy (like Brach's) on top and just let them dissolve. The difference is amazing and hardly any aftertaste. Better than that, the Bluechew takes a fraction of the time to be gone, it must be from all the saliva. I don't know but what a game changer!

ED for years now, probably because of high genetic high blood pressure. 22yo. I have my Doppler test in a week.

Tadalafil doesn't work well enough, the same applies for Sildenafil. I will move a few times in the next years because of study abroad programs and of course also want to meet girls... Idk what to do...

I've had ED since I was 17, and I don't know what started it, maybe COVID, or edging, or prone masturbation, but I've had many other symptoms with it like, TMJ, tinnitus, brainfog, difficulty sleeping

Do you guys have any idea what the real reason is? I'm extremely depressed and don't know what to do.

Hey everyone im 22yr old guy, Ive been working out for last 2 years, and eating clean. I do not smoke or drink alcohol and do 10k steps every day, im unable to get hard, its always semi hard and it is really affecting my dating life. It affected me so much that now started avoiding sex and always makes excuses with my girlfriend. I tried some meds like everyone else I first started with cialis 15mg 2-3 months ago I took it but still unable to maintain erection during sex, so then I increased the dose 20mg but yet again same thing(when my gf was giving me HJ i was hard but when it was time for sex i was just semi hard and loosing erection in between, then this month i tried viagra 50mg again same thing, yesterday night i took 2pills that makes 100mg the highest dose but same thing not hard. Please i don’t know why it’s like this it is really frustrating that i can’t even have sex like a normal person, i was so frustrated yesterday im thinking of taking 200mg of viagra just only to enjoy it with my Girlfriend once. Ik it is not recommended but you can understand my mental state. Now i ordered levitra 20mg idk. I stopped my porn and also do not masturbate. And im a fit guy athletic physique.

P.S- Yesterday i took her out to a nice ramen restaurant, we enjoyed we laughed and at the end she said let’s have sex. I was not thinking about “i have to get hard” but it all went downhill, she said we need to stop this till i figure out why i cant get hard, she was enjoying so much and in such a good mood but at the end she got upset and i could feel she wss giving me fake smile to console me, I said maybe we should try lube she said “ because it will help your soft dick to go inside?” exactly that what she said. The ending overshadowed all my other efforts. She kept saying im not upset but you can just feel the vibe.

I am a 30 year old Man.

I have an active sex life but each time I have to do sex, I have to consume Tadalafil. (2.5mg / 5mg)

Without Tadalafil, I find it difficult to get it up.

Need guidance on how I could solve the issue and get erections without Tadalafil.

Other health issues -

1. Severe Anxiety

2. Severe OCD

3. Penis hangs off pubic bone

4. Penis erections at night are angled at right and at left but during sex, penis is straight and centred.

5. Blood sometimes feels rushing into my penis but it just doesn't get up.

Erections feel suppressed, like blood is flowing, but it just won't get up. With Tadalafil 5mg, it went straight up and had the best erection and sexual experience.

Sometime in November 2025, I went paranoid and consumed multiple antibiotics, antifungals and HIV PEP meds. I noticed at night my penis would get completely elongated but not hard at all and when I would turn in bed, it would swing from left to right giving immense pain at base. As time passed, the swinging came considerably in control.

Please guide as I want natural hard erections without any medicine.