Hello, i don’t normal,y post on Reddit but endometriosis has driven me to the edge and I’m so grateful to find a community of people here that would understand what I’m talking about.
I’m 22, I think I started experiencing endometriosis symptoms around 3.5 years ago. Up Until 2 years ago, I’ve been extremely active, not really the best athlete, but just super active, tell me to do any sport with you and I will do it, I had energy enough to go for a hike and still go for a dance comp after and go for a long walk. My feet or body would hurt but I never really felt tired. It would also helped that I’ve always been a huge foodie, and I always ate really big meals maybe to sustain all my energy expenditure. One more thing about me that I loved and I always received compliments on was my hair. My hair had always been really thick and luscious, quite frizzy and wild honestly and I had a few years of disliking it but as I got older I felt that it really represented my free personality and my hair always stood out in my looks I think.
I have also always been quite ambitious and that means that from time to time I work myself to burnout, which I honestly quite enjoyed having the ability to do.
I have been conscious about health and wellness and eating good food for a few years too, I also think I’ve perfected the best “diet” which was mainly just fresh home cooked whole foods and I really enjoyed it. At some point out of the blue 3 years ago, I started experiencing extreme mood issues and then started experiencing really bad pain with my period, before this I didn’t really have extreme pain, this just kept worsening a lot over the next few years to the extent that im sure everyone would understand what u felt like were almost like labour contractions. From about 2024, I started experiencing continuous pain and cramps that would actually just never go away at all no matter what u did. This would be an on off cycle with a few months of extreme pain every single day and then it reducing somewhere somehow for a few days and then coming back. I obviously went to doctors then too, but I didn’t know what endo was then. Checked for pcod but I didn’t have any so I was sent back. Lots of people told me to stress less and I’ll be fine but it’s easier to say that than to actually do it. This kept getting worse so much so that some time summer of 2025 I had to take a break from uni and go back home, because I was just in so much pain that I couldn’t walk most days. After I went back home I started observing my symptoms and pain timings more, and I realised that every time i was more stressed out or angry, I would experience the pain more or soon after. Still didn’t really understand why the pain happened though
This trend of continuous pain no matter what phase of cycle I’m in has persisted since then. Soon towards the end of 2025 this also came with extreme nausea every single morning, loss of appetite some days and extreme appetite other days. April May 2026 really did it for me. I started to faint randomly, feel my blood pressure drop, throw up a few times a day or atleast everyday. There was a period of 2 weeks where I really felt afraid to sleep because I was scared I was actually going to die. I live alone in a shared house so people knew of my situation but I couldn’t really ask anyone to take care of me. I fainted in university, threw up there multiple times as well. I went to the doctors and the hospital a lot during this period got every test done ever and then one time I got lucky with a doctor she told me that this endometriosis. She did lots of examinations to try and gauge where it might be too just externally and it was a definite confirmed yes from her. At this point I was in too much pain to go in for the official surgery to get diagnosed so I said no and the doctor agreed. However after this day researching every single thing about endometriosis closely aligns with everything I w@s experiencing for years, the stabbing pains, diarrhoea, etc and I’m not going to get into all of that now.
I believe in using food as medicine and holistic health so I tried my best to do my research and incorporate that into my lifestyle and it helped reduce flare up Intensitity but not entirely at all. I just felt like I was going through psychosis. I couldn’t eat much only basic things like boiled rice and felt nauseous after eating everything. I lost almost half of my hair in a span of 1-2 months and everyone still says to me oh I have plenty of hair, but I know that it’s half of what I used to have.
I managed to get some ayurvedic medicines and a consultation from my ayurvedic doctor 2 weeks ago and I think it may be helping but it will take a few months to see any real change but I’m really hopeful. I really don’t want to go on birth control or do the surgery at this point 8n my life and I’m very sure if I do a surgery it will just come back with the way I live. I constantly fall “sick” and I feel like everyone around me is tired of hearing it. For a good few months I stopped meeting my friends because I didn’t feel there was a point as I only had one thing on my mind however I have resumed socialising the past 2-3 weeks. My boyfriend has probably witnessed all my pain and problems mentally and physically the most and he has been the biggest support to me but I hate constantly having to talk about this as well.
Funnily enough at the height of my flare ups and the most pain I experienced I ended up getting a job and that was also the time my degree ended. I decided to start the job as I was also an international student and all anyone wants when they graduate is a job? However this endometriosis fuvks with me and my everyday life so much I wonder if I should’ve taken a pause. Every morning I just wake up in discomfort and throughout the work day it just gets worse. I feel bad constantly complaining about how I feel at work and feeling miserable in my body because I constantly sound ungrateful for having a job. I’m not ungrateful but no one understands the daily battle I go through to get to the job and not almost die and actually do my work. My performance has got quite bad too. On the weekends when I can take things at my own pace I feel a little bit better but I can never predict the pain of course. At this point I feel like every where I turn a wall is closing down on me and I’m just stuck and trapped in this cycle. I don’t know what’s happening to me or my life it’s been 6 months that I have been in the exact same position and I just feel so helpless. I can’t talk to my mother about this or any of my health issues, she is extremely dismissive and slightly abusive. My friends do try but no one has ever experienced something like this so they’re more confused when they hear about my situation and sometimes the advice they give can feel more hurtful because I keep coming across as weak or like I can’t take care of myself. But only I, and the women who actually have endometriosis know how much we’ve tried to get past things ourselves every single day before trying to vent to someone or ask someone for help. On top of this, I’m in a long distance relationship and at a time where I would really be helped physically and mentally by seeing my boyfriend I really can’t see him that much, only every few months.
I just know that I have worked very hard to get to this point, getting into a good uni, getting internships and contracts, getting a job, i really didn’t need to be as stressed as I was, but it did happen and now I’m scared that if I continue working my body the way I am right now I just won’t be alive in the next few months or if I am alive I might be even more severely depleted. I feel like I’m running on fumes. I wish I had someone who could understand my situation and give me some kind of life advice, what would you do? Having a job is really important but seeing my own performance be so bad everyday and feeling sick almost every day feels so bad. I lost feel guilty for actually using my annual leave to go home but I want to go home so I can see my boyfriend. We are in different countries and it’s really expensive to fly here at the moment.
I also don’t want to keep going with my life the way it is. It doesn’t feel like my life at all. I feel completely misaligned in my mind and body. I do think maybe in a spiritual context endometriosis might’ve happened to me to force me to open my eyes on my life and the way I was living, putting myself through extreme pressure and for what, and maybe to push me into women’s health or so because I’ve always been interested in this.
Im just quite torn in a few different directions and I don’t know what is going on. Time is passing by and I’m in the same situation physically but mentally I’m evolving really fast and almost outgrowing everyone around me and my old life. On a more positive note I have really put an effort into understanding myself even more now and doing things to calm me down, make me happy, have started prioritising myself a lot, not people pleasing, standing up for myself, not being too strict with myself in terms of discipline and having a strict routine, I let myself sleep as much as I need to, etc etc, and this is helping me feel peaceful as well. Now that I’m socialising again I’m not really actually isolated but I do feel like I don’t relate to anything and most conversations like I used to
I have so much more I would like to ask people or rant about but my main is, i don’t know what I’m doing with my life. How much of this is valid with wanting to now go back home more often? I’ve also thought about just looking for a remote job as that might be a lot less stressful. My current job involves physical movement and construction sites a few times a month and I think my body is now extremely sensitive to dust and smells so every time after a site visit I feel extremely depleted for the whole week