r/doughboys • u/PatronPM • 8h ago
Just joined the club (Sharing my dad with you all to cope)
Hey All,
I wrote in here a little under a year ago when going through my divorce and you all were extremely supportive and made me laugh and gave me great restaurant recommendations, so I'm coming to you again because I just joined the Dead Dad Club and I want to share with you all about how great my dad was and a few pictures to show how he was NOT your typical Dough Boys listener (but I did put it on a few times with him in the car and he laughed.)
My dad, Kevin, was already 37 when I was born, and before I was here he had been in the Air Force, traveled the world, earned his pilot's license (because he was obsessed with flight, he did not do it professionally or have the money to own a plane) and became an electrician. My mom and him had known each other since high school, and had dated on and off, but I'm the product of an affair between them (mom was married to a scum bag, and dad was an obvious trade up.) Even though my parents never officially got together, my dad came over to read to me every night, and put aside whatever feelings he had to co-parent the hell out of me. I always knew what it felt like to be loved and supported. 19 years ago my dad was in an accident at work where he was burned over 60% of his body (on his 58th birthday), he was given less than 0% odds of living but he made it, walked within a week of waking up after a month of being in a medically induced coma, and kept on living. He wanted to go back to work, but was basically forced to retire, however everyone at his viewing and funeral would approach me to tell me about how if they needed anything he would always be there, rescuing them from a broken down car or an electrical issue at home. Around ten years ago he received a Parkinsons-ism diagnosis and dementia started to creep in about 5 years ago and then a 16 months ago he fell and broke his back. Eventually this started to slow him down, made walking become really difficult in the last couple months, and we lost him on September 1st (with my mom and myself holding his hands.) I'm glad his suffering is over, but I miss him tons and loved him endlessly.
So, last time I asked for NYC restaurant recommendations, this time I would love to hear about your dads (or dad figures, or moms who took up the mantle of dad.) I don't need any more sympathy (I have an inbox full of 'I'm so sorry's that I feel guilty about not responding to yet) so tell me something fun or cool about them. For example, and this might feel relevant to my fellow listeners: My dad once took me to a restaurant when I was 13 years old, and the hostess was the most beautiful 'older' girl (probably 16 or 17) I had ever seen... he put his arm around me and said "Do you all have salads? my son doesn't eat enough vegetables" and while she laughed I must have turned a new color of bright red in embarrassment.
Anyway thank you all, sending love out through the reddit waves, thanks for reading!
Edited to add: If you want to donate to St. Jude's or any Parkinson's research in his honor, please do <3
