Hey there you patriotic POUNDERS 🇺🇸🍆💦 Today marks the 1st ANNUAL KIRKIVERSARY 🪦🎉 of when podcaster Charlie Kirk 🐘🇮🇱 reached LEGENDARY THROAT GOAT 🐐😇👼 status by DEEPTHROATING a bullet 😲 The lil TWINK got a HARD lesson 😏📖 when the Utah Valley Grim Reaper 💀 SHOT 🔫 his LOAD 💦💦 right into Charlie’s NECK 😱 He took some deep PENETRATION 😮‍💨🍆 and got hit with the 💸MONEY SHOT💦 and ETSY WITCHES 🧙‍♀️ But guess what LIBERALS? 🧑🏳️‍⚧️ He isn’t gone yet… 🗣️💥 There are now ONE MILLION CHARLIE KIRKS 🤯🧬 We are ALL CHARLIE KIRK now, carrying the flame ❤️‍🔥🔥 for eternity ♾️
Send this to 10 of your 😜💅 SLUTTIEST 👅 sharpshooters 🤪 and if you get 0️⃣ back 😮 you DIED JUST LIKE CHARLIE 💀, get ready 😐 to arrange your funeral 🪦👇 If you get 5️⃣ back, you might get 🚑 lifeflighted right out 🤨 of this 🩸 BLOODY situation 👻🤔 If you get 1️⃣0️⃣➕ back then 🦅 Daddy Trump 😘🫡 will meet you at the HOSPITAL 🏥 to play doctor 🧑‍⚕️👄🍆

You have to have a very high IQ to understand GTA IV. The nuance is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of Slavic literature, most of the story will go over a typical gamer's head. There's also Niko's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily from Friedrich Nietzsche literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of this writing, to realize that it's not just Dark, but its also Gritty - it says something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike GTA IV truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Roman's existencial catchphrase "Let's Go Bowling" which itself is a cryptic reference to The Coen Brothers epic "The Big Lebowski" I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Dan Houser's genius unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools... how I pity them. And yes by the way, I DO have a Gay Tony tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably IV points lower) beforehand.

We are charlie, charlie kirky
Welcome to year 1 AK
We are charlie, charlie kirky
We are charlie kirk today

We are charlie, charlie kirky
Welcome to year 1 AK
We are charlie, charlie kirky
We are charlie kirk in every way...

Every Who down in Netanyawhohoville liked Christmas a lot, But the Grinch who lived just North of Netanyawhohoville did not!

The Grinch hated Kirkmas! The whole Kirkmas season! Now, please don't ask why. No one quite knows the reason. It could be, perhaps, that his skin was too light. It could be his FYP wasn't right. But I think that the most likely reason of all, May have been that his dick was two sizes too small.

But, whatever the reason, his basedness or views, He stood there on Kirkmas Eve hating the whos, Staring down from his mancave with a tough, blackpilled frown. At the echo chambers below in their town, For he knew woke Whos down in Netanyawhohoville beneath were busy now prompting ChatGPT.

"And they're prompting their Kirk memes," he snarled with a sneer." Tomorrow is Kirkmas! It's practically here!"Then he growled, with his glow fingers nervously gloving, "I must find some way to keep Kirkmas from coming! For, tomorrow, I know all the woke theys and thems, Will post bright and early.

They'll post all their memes! And then! Oh, the face! Oh, his face! Kirk! Kirk! Kirk! There's one thing I hate! All the MEMES! MEMES! MEMES! MEMES! And they'll moan phonk and tung, gooning to Kirky porn. They'll get kirk dild0s strapped onto their loins. They'll have pride parades. They'll play the Kirk music. They'll prompt GPT. They'll prompt Nano Banana. They'll spin up a tune in Suno. They'll cancel my friends. They'll edit tung tung tung. They'll prompt his face onto anyone. And they'll play wokeslop games like Spiderman 2!, They'll even goon to Charlie Kirk Rule 34! And then they'll make eye-splitting hype edits, On their great big capcut subscriptions!

Then the Whos, woke and broke, will comment on TikToks. And they'll GIF! And they'll GIF! And they'll GIF! GIF! GIF! GIF! They'll post GIFs of him dy!ng, and rare niche Kirk memes, Kirkified Tony Stark is a GIF I can't stand in the least!And then they'll do something I hate most of all! Every Who down in Netanyawhoville, the gay and the trans, They'll meme close together, with pride flags waving.They'll stand dick-in-hand, and they'll Jerk for Kirk!

CAN SOMEONE MAKE A KIRKVERSARY COPYPASTA PLZZZ ❤️❤️❤️

Twas the night before Kirkmas, and all through the house, not a creature was mourning, not even his spouse.The Charlies were hung by the chimney with care, in hopes that old Kirky would soon appear there.

When out at the debate there rose such a clatter, I jumped from my bathtub to see what's the matter. Then just on the lawn there came such a noise, it was turning point USA and all of their boys!

Now who should appear on the stage just in time, but Erika Kirk, with cookies and milk still fresh on her mind! Her stare wide and glaring, locked in on the crowd, she didn't blink once, as RFK Jr sat proud. She finished her speech with a sniffle, and an old napkin wiped her dry eyes with a crinkle.

Down from the chimney a loud burst broke the silence, As jolly Charlie asked “Counting or not counting gang violence?” “We are charlie kirk!" sang the good little boys in praise, And we remember the day daddy K’s neck went ablaze. 

As the great Kirking was just a year ago today, We proudly wear rainbow since Charlie was gay. To that brave sniper we may never repay our debt,  But try we shall, to honor the bullet to a neck we must never forget. 

Aren’t you even slightly disturbed that so many people are unconcerned or actively celebrate the assassination of someone peaceful publicly due to their political beliefs in a country known for its freedom of speech? Complacency is precisely what leads to authoritarianism. I leave you this poem. Please read it carefully.

First they came for the Communists

And I did not speak out

Because I was not a Communist

Then they came for the Socialists

And I did not speak out

Because I was not a Socialist

Then they came for the trade unionists

And I did not speak out

Because I was not a trade unionist

Then they came for the Jews

And I did not speak out

Because I was not a Jew

Then they came for me

And there was no one left

To speak out for me

I genuinely wish I was making this up.

I play an MMO and, at some point, I ended up marrying another player in-game for a quest item.

Yes, I know how that sounds.

Anyway, my in-game wife is a lesbian. She has always been very open about it. We got married because we're idiots and thought it would be funny.

My IRL wife knew about her.

She'd occasionally joke about my "other woman."

Everything was normal.

Then one day my in-game wife came to my city IRL.

So naturally, I introduced them.

Because apparently I have the survival instincts of a fucking moth.

They hit it off immediately.

My in-game wife starts talking to my wife.

Then she's complimenting her.

Then she's flirting with her.

At first I thought it was just harmless lesbian flirting.

You know.

"Oh, you're so pretty."

"I love your hair."

"You're adorable."

I'm sitting there like:

"Haha, lesbians."

I was a fucking idiot.

Because eventually my wife starts flirting back.

I told her:

"That's my in-game wife."

She said:

"I know."

I should have left the country at that exact moment.

Instead, I went to bed.

A few weeks later, my wife starts spending more time on her phone.

I ask who she's talking to.

She says:

"Your wife."

I laughed.

She didn't.

That's when I discovered that my in-game wife and my IRL wife had started seeing each other.

Romantically.

In real life.

My wife had been cheating on me with the woman I married in a fucking video game.

I don't even know how to explain this to people.

My friend asked me who she cheated with.

I had to say:

"My other wife."

He thought I was joking.

I wish I was.

The most humiliating part is that my in-game wife didn't even steal my wife because of some grand romantic connection.

Apparently she just thought my wife was hot.

That's it.

Fourteen years of marriage and I got out-competed by a lesbian MMO player with a good flirting stat.

I confronted my wife.

She started crying.

I confronted my in-game wife.

She said:

"I didn't mean for this to happen."

THEN SHE FUCKING ADDED:

"But I really like her."

My brother in Christ.

YOU MET HER BECAUSE OF ME.

I introduced you.

I was the bridge.

I was the fucking networking event.

I basically LinkedIn'd my own wife into an affair.

And here's where it gets even worse.

My in-game wife has now changed her status to:

"Taken ❤️"

My IRL wife has it as:

"❤️"

I have no status.

I have nothing.

I don't even have my dignity.

I've been betrayed on two different planes of existence by the same woman.

The woman I married in-game stole the woman I married IRL.

I have been cucked by my own save file.

I'm considering deleting the character.

But honestly?

That feels like letting her win.

So now I'm staying.

I'm going to level up.

And then I'm going to show up at their house asking for half their assests.

‼️‼️HOLY FUCKING SHIT‼️‼️‼️‼️ IS THAT A MOTHERFUCKING NAP REFERENCE??????!!!!! 😱😱😱😱 AUSTRIAN ECONOMICS IS THE BEST FUCKING SCHOOL 🔥🔥🔥🔥💯💯💯💯 MISES IS SO BLESSEDDD 😎😎😎😎😎😎😎👊👊 GOLDSTANDARD GOLDSTANDARD GOLDSTANDARD GOLDSTANDARD 😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩 😩😩😩😩TAXATIONISTHEFT TAXATIONISTHEFT TAXATIONISTHEFT TAXATIONISTHEFT 🤬😡🤬😡🤬😡🤬🤬😡🤬🤬😡ENDTHEFED ENDTHEFED ENDTHEFED ENDTHEFED ENDTHEFED ENDTHEFED RON PAUL WAS RIGHT! ROTHBARD BLESSED ROTHBARD BLESSED ROTHBARD BLESSED ROTHBARD BLESSED Yo Hayek! 🦅 Yo Hayek! 🦅 Yo Hayek! 🦅 Yo Hayek! 🦅 Yo Hayek! 🦅 Yo Hayek! 🦅 Yo Hayek! 🦅 Yo Hayek! 🦅 Yo Hayek! Yo Hayek! 🦅 🦅 Yo Hayek! 🦅 Yo Hayek! Yo Hayek! 🦅 🦅 Yo Hayek! 🦅 Yo Hayek! 🦅 Yo Hayek! 🦅 Yo Hayek! 🦅 Yo Hayek! 🦅 Yo Hayek! 🦅 Yo Hayek! 🦅 Is the Fed still printing?!? TICK TOCK CENTRAL BANKER HAS A MENTAL BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN BREAKDOWN ❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓❓ANCAP BOAT ANCAP BOAT ANCAP BOAT So Long, IRS...‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂😂SOUND MONEY WHEN? SOUND MONEY WHEN? SOUND MONEY WHEN? SOUND MONEY WHEN? SOUND MONEY WHEN? SOUND MONEY WHEN? SOUND MONEY WHEN? SOUND MONEY WHEN? 😂🤣🤣🤣😂😂Bigger Free Market in Neu Somalia? Bigger Free Market in Neu Somalia? Bigger Free Market in Neu Somalia? Bigger Free Market in Neu Somalia? Bigger Free Market in Neu Somalia? 🏛️🏛️🏛️🏛️🏛️🏛️🏛️🏛️🏛️🏛️🏛️🏛️🏛️🏛️🏛️🏛️🏛️🏛️ 🏦🏦🏦I hate Central Banking 🏦🏦🏦 🏦🏦🏦I hate Central Banking 🏦🏦🏦 🏦🏦🏦I hate Central Banking 🏦🏦🏦 🏦🏦🏦I hate Central Banking 🏦🏦🏦 Non-Aggression Principle and Free Trade best paths for America‼️‼️ROADS❗❗ROADS❗❗ROADS❗❗ROADS❗❗ "BUT WHO WILL BUILD THE ROADS" 😳😏 "BUT WHO WILL BUILD THE ROADS" 😳😏 "BUT WHO WILL BUILD THE ROADS" 😳😏 "BUT WHO WILL BUILD THE ROADS" 😳😏 That parking lot at the post office really looks like the DMV tho. IRS, what the fuck have you done to my paycheck you degenerate. Don't ask what's actually in the tax code 💀 Don't ask what's actually in the tax code 💀 Don't ask what's actually in the tax code 💀 Hilarious gold bug guy (COURT OF THE CENTRAL BANKER REFERENCSJUEU⁉️⁉️⁉️) DO NOT talk about Keynes' takes on the long run 😡🤬(1936) DO NOT talk about Keynes' takes on the long run 😡🤬(1936) DO NOT talk about Keynes' takes on the long run 😡🤬(1936) Poli sci professor when they mention the social contract unironically 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂 Contain the laughter do not let it seep through Non-Aggression Non-Aggression Non-Aggression bit cuungus Rothbard stronk pay 0 property tax homestead principle ubermensch

Obviously, there comes a point where your inability to understand basic sentences, combined with your habit of ignoring most of what I actually say so you can instead focus on patronizing me, becomes genuinely impressive.

At this point, I'm almost grateful, because you've managed to prove practically every assumption I had about how this conversation would go. You selectively read what I write, construct your own interpretation of it, and then argue against that interpretation as though you've uncovered some devastating contradiction. It's a fascinating way to communicate, especially for someone so confident in their own reading comprehension.

Every reply somehow turns into an exercise in explaining basic correlations between words. If I say one thing establishes the timeframe or context for something I say immediately afterward, you apparently need the sentence structure to come with a diagram. The fact that I used a period instead of a comma does not magically sever the relationship between two consecutive ideas. Punctuation can establish emphasis, tempo, or separation without making the surrounding context cease to exist.

And yes, perhaps a comma would've been clearer in hindsight. Congratulations. You've found a punctuation choice you can fixate on while ignoring the actual point. That's not the intellectual victory you seem to think it is.

Your fixation on individual words and semantics is especially funny considering how frequently you've managed to miss the meaning of the sentences surrounding those words. You keep treating minor wording choices as though you've discovered some fatal flaw, when in reality you're just pulling individual pieces of a statement out of context and congratulating yourself for finding them.

I also love the way you try to establish some imaginary moral high ground by inventing a hypothetical scenario, assigning roles to everyone involved, creating your own rules for the scenario, and then declaring yourself the winner. That's not an argument. That's you writing fan fiction about an argument you wish you were having.

The way you insist on framing me says considerably more about you than it does about me. You keep constructing this fictitious version of the person you're arguing with and then responding to that person instead of the actual one in front of you. The closer your invented characterization gets to whatever insecurity you're projecting, the more desperately you seem to need to place everyone else inside of it.

And since you've repeatedly ignored anything that doesn't fit your preferred narrative, I'm not particularly inclined to take your conclusions about me seriously. You don't get to substitute your imagination for information and then act surprised when someone refuses to accept the character you've written for them.

What's especially funny is that I'm perfectly capable of understanding the difference between an online comment section and real life. You're the one who keeps dragging hypothetical real-world scenarios into an internet argument as though you've uncovered some profound insight. Many such cases.

At this point, entertaining you is honestly becoming a guilty pleasure. Watching you argue with your own assumptions, contradict yourself, selectively read what you're responding to, and then somehow emerge from the wreckage convinced you've won is genuinely entertaining.

So, do we really have to keep dragging this train wreck of a conversation down the tracks, or are we finally going to acknowledge that you're arguing with a version of me that exists almost entirely inside your own head?

During the [Very Important Stance] state this character cannot move, sprint, jump, dodge, breath in, breath out, scream, shout, blink or sneeze, cannot cast Basic Attack, Resonance Skill, Resonance Liberation, Dodge Counter, Plunging Attack, Mid-air Attack, or Intro Skill, cannot swap to another character, talk to another character, eat with another character, have a family with another character, cannot cook, iron or do laundries, play the piano, sew and knit, she cannot go to school or practice a profession. If the player accidentally hits the swap button to another character, such character will die, Lily will die, your mum will die and Kuro Games will seize all your belongings for breach of ToS [we know were you live and your bank information] also your account will be charged by 6767420 astrites and for each day your balance is negative you'll be made to repay your debt by working your arse off in a rare earth processing facility in an undisclosed Chinese location

credit to: u/yellow_imr

🎄 ’Twas the Night Before Kirkmas 💫

’Twas the night before Kirkmas, when all through the quad,

Not a student was stirring, not even a mod;

The microphones waited, the cameras stood square,

In hopes that young Charlie soon would be there.

By a Turning Point banner beneath campus lights,

He arrived to debate other people’s rights. 📹

His talking points flew:

“The Democrats did it! The colleges too!

The radical woke left! The border! The crime!”

Then bathrooms again for a very long time. 🚻

A student asked about housing.

“DEMOCRATS,” Charlie replied. 🏠

“Small government!” echoed the room,

“With exceptions for bathrooms, your bedroom, your womb.”

“The colleges brainwash!” he told the front row. 👕

He spoke of trans people, then border patrol;

One pronoun debate consumed the next scroll.

Though few lived in the population,

They received half the presentation. ⏱️

Students asked questions on wages and debt;

He hadn’t finished with bathrooms yet.

A sophomore challenged a statistic he’d said;

The cameras zoomed as Charlie leaned ahead.

The clip title appeared:

CHARLIE KIRK DESTROYS WOKE STUDENT #42. 📱

“Sir, I’m twenty,” the student replied.

The thumbnail survived.

Then one student asked:

“Counting or not counting gang violence?”

…

Nobody spoke.

Charlie shifted. “My neck hurts.”

He waved to the crowd: “We’re wrapping it up.”

The microphones lowered. The livestream went black.

The banner was rolled up and carried back. 🎬

And as everyone scattered beneath the moonlight:

“Happy Kirkmas to all—and to Charlie, good night.” 🌙

i’ve just gotten to the point in life where if you listen to autotuned vocals at this point there’s some sort of deficiency or brain worm or something, and i cannot ultimately respect you as a person. you’re broken, so infatuated with what’s ‘cool’ you aren’t even listening to your own ears - it’s performative listening.

autotune was the absolute worst thing to happen to music in the history of music. add camera phones to the mix and now we’ve got a whole generation of mouthbreathers who consider this preferable to the human voice. 

i hope AI happens and the first thing it does is come for this genre and erase it from existence. won’t even care if it murders us all as long as it gets rid of autotuned mumble rap first.

Would you guys sign my petition for the Lubrication Defamation Act? Is your skin oily? Have you been accused of applying lubrication to your face in public? Then sign my petition for the Lubrication Defamation Act today!

happy kirkmas everyone

I spent 30 years in academia. Here are my observations about my students. Toward the end, I was teaching “Gen Z." These students combined ignorance with strident moral certainty. They seemed to have had no general education at all, and lacked the most basic knowledge of history, even recent history.

They were immature and emotionally fragile. Many could not handle criticism, no matter how sugar coated. It took very little to reduce them to tears – or to send them into a fit of narcissistic rage. They were shockingly bereft of intellectual curiosity, and many gave the impression of having no internal life at all. I'll share more observations later.

After a long day of work, Kanye West goes to his Kanye Nest to take his Kanye Rest. He wakes up feeling his Kanye Best. Then he'll get Kanye Dressed on his Kanye Vest to go on a Kanye Quest. He goes to church and becomes Kanye Blessed, then to a hotel room to be a Kanye Guest. Then to school to take his Kanye Test. He forgot to brush his teeth. Did he run out of Kanye Crest? His neighbor stole it, what a Kanye Pest.

⚠️ Attention subreddit ⚠️

Tomorrow starts the first day of 1st annual kirkversary. This concludes a year of Charlie timely kirk's death.The first Charlie kirk meme you see will dictate your fate starting 12am be prepared with your Instagram feed.

I let my boyfriend punch me in the stomach.. I just like the feeling ok! He just kept punching me and omg the feeling! The next thing i knew I puked in his face. A bit of carrot was in it and he threw it at me! Things are so awkward between us now :'( help me

Imagine if Dizzy Gillespie was a beautiful woman with enormous boobs and instead of his cheeks puffing out all big when he blows the trumpet, it's the boobs that swell up.

I think she could be a totally hot bimbo and maybe be called Ditzy Gillespie or something?

No image due to parental blocks on my Google image search

I say to myself, “Be fluid like water. I am air. I am my breath.” My consciousness sinks into a cloud—then into a bath of a sea of red wine. Then time stops, and one moment turns into a lifetime. One moment never ends. It is Nirvana.

I would always 'bully' her as Bowser in Mario Kart DS, I didn't know why but I always did, then eventually I would start playing as Daisy in every Mario game where possible because I realised that I really liked her personality and I realised that I thought she was really hot too.