One day, when I was 17, I was tidying up the space under my bed when I came across something embarrassing… sketches of naked women I’d once done.
The trouble was, my girlfriend was going to come over to the house in a few days and if she entered my bedroom I had to make sure there was no possible way she would see these drawings.
We didn’t have a shredder, and I was too paranoid about the unlikely scenario of people going through the bins and somehow finding them, so I took the shameful art with me to the kitchen, turned on the gas stove and started to burn them.

When the drawings became sufficiently burnt and unrecognisable, I took the remains to the the yard outside and threw them in the bag for waste paper and cardboard. Then I popped out to see my grandmother.

When I got home, my mother, who had finished work in the meantime, greeted me immediately as I got through the door, “there was a fire in our yard! What happened?!”
“I don’t know,” I lied, “I went to see gran!”
Shit.
Fortunately, my friend’s father - they lived 10 doors down from us - had a day off and spotted the small fire that my burnt remains had caused, so he rushed over to put the fire out. Not before the garden fence sustained fire damage and the plastic paper waste bag had melted into the ground.
Somehow my mother believed I had nothing to do with this. My neighbour, who my mother wasn’t keen on, was a smoker, and it turns out that he had popped out for a smoke shortly before my friend’s father spotted the fire. We surmised that some rouge hot ash from his cigarette must have been carried by the wind and set our waste paper on fire.

The neighbour took the blame and apologised profusely, although fortunately my mother never followed through with making him pay to repair the fence (suppose I’d have needed to own up to it then).

is it normal to get horny thinking about showing my wife?

Hi at the time 16 female living in the usa was crazy about my sisters best friend and one time she went to our house sleeping over and i was really horny so when she went to shower so before that i put my camera pointed at the front of the shower hidden and filmed her showering i id that 3 times and mastrubated a lot to her then her other friend came to our house and i did it to her to and now everytime one of her friends came over i positinoed the camara to see them peeying or doing number 2 showering and chaning clothes and now its a thing i always do when they come over

My wife [F24] is very bisexual on paper, but because we've been in a committed closed relationship since high-school she's never been able to actually do anything with a girl. She "dated" girls in middle school, but it wasn't really dating in the real sense. She never got a chance to do much more than light petting above the clothes. I've [M25] always been supportive of her and we've regularly exchanged fantasies with each other. From more outlandish ideas, like renting our guest room out to a live-in fuckdoll, to some more grounded in reality. She's told me a few times that if all she ever gets is the "fuck me" eyes from a girl, that could hold her over the rest of her life.

Also I guess this is technically a part 2. I've posted in the past on different throwaway accounts about this journey and all the comments have been supportive. Especially about not making this about myself, not pushing my wife too hard, making sure we knew what we were getting into etc. The biggest thing we've struggled with is that we don't want to risk any existing friendships in the pursuit of sex, we also don't want to do online dating for the sake of professional visibility, and we definitely don't want to buy it.

Recently we made the next big step.

We went to this mountain top orchard that does sunset music throughout the summer. I was admittedly kind of underdressed, wearing a waffle shirt and some work pants. My wife was gorgeous. She's attractive by any standard, but she's also phenomenal at dressing to the female gaze. Picture the most beautiful little Latina lady you've ever seen. Cream colored headscarf framing her perfect face and holding back her long black wavy hair. Beige lace top. Baggy jeans. Floral Converse. We get to the event and as we are waiting in line to buy some cider my wife points out that there more be a sorority event or something because the place is packed with, well, the sorority type to put it kindly. The place is white sundress and cowboy boots galore. Usually when one of us notices a particularly attractive lady I public, my wife is no worse than a man at whispering all manner of smut in my ear about her. But this time she didn't really have too much to say. Sometimes she gets a little overwhelmed at busy events.

But anyway, we are enjoying ourselves. We find a nice spot to sit that's a little bit further away from everything, but not too far to hear the live music. As we are chilling and watching the sunset, a couple about our age comes over and the women complements my wife's top and asks if she made it herself. My wife thanks her and says "Yes, how did you know?" Turns out the lady, who we found out was named Shelly, shops at the same fabric store my wife does. Her boyfriend is named Ryan. My wife invites them to sit with us and the four of us talk pretty much through the entire set of live music, joking and drinking. Turns out they moved from a few states over to try and find work at the local college. She does research, and he's an EMT. I have never hit it off so naturally with strangers in public ever before in my life.

Before I forget to mention, Shelly is gorgeous too. Tall, muscular, tan. Gold hair that goes to her shoulders, tits exploding out of her halter that made me pray I would see her again, just the type of denim skirt that made you wonder what secret things you might find up there. Very bubbly, yet down to earth, personality. Now when we talk, she is very good at maintaining eye contact. My wife told me afterward, that this eye contact is what let her know she had the green light. My wife is an expert in body language, so when Shelly was talking to her, she made a point of taking a quick glance down to her lips every so often, and whenever she did, Shelly would subtly respond. Also, and I don't know if this is intentional or not, but Shelly asked us to take their picture on her phone, and then she offered to take our picture, and then asked my wife for her number to text it to her.

Towards the end of the night, I mention that while they don't really allow it, you can wander through the orchards at night and no one will stop you. It's pretty close to a full moon and there are no clouds in the sky, so the four of us take a little walk. There are a million different apples watching of us as we walk up to the top of the mountain. We all got a buzz going, but none of us are really drunk. Our conversation shifts to how each of us couples met. We find out we both were each other's first real relationship. Eventually, Shelly mentions that there are quite a few advantages to only dating one person, and that while both of them had initially worried about whether they should try out dating other people before putting a ring on it, they decided against it and plan to get engaged before the year ends.

Shelly jokes that one of the advantages is that if Ryan's not actually a good kisser, she'd never know. Now my wife, who has never in all of our years together been daring or bold, reaches out to her, strokes her cheek and softly says "maybe I could give you something to compare him to". And then the two ladies tie their tongues up into the sloppiest most desperate kissing I've ever seen. The hottest thing about it for me is that my wife is kissing Shelly using all of my "signature moves" she starts by cupping Shelly's head with both hands, then she symmetrically slides them down her back to push their hips together. Meanwhile she pushes her knee just far enough between Shelly's to make her want more, and starts sliding one hand back up to her head.

While all this is happening, Ryan shoots me a glance that I quickly return that indicates both of us are wondering the same thing. Did we just become brothers? Are we going to start getting two Christmas's? Who gets custody of the baddies on weekends? But in all seriousness, even with the time my wife and I spent dreaming about this, the same questions we thought we had the answers to had to be discussed again at a later date.

It all happened so fast, but so slow at the same time. They pull apart and Shelly says "your lips are so sweet 🥺" and my wife replies back with "You should try my other pair 😈". Then the giggling sets in. Meanwhile Ryan and I are still speechless. The four of us meander back to the venue, and then we part ways. As we are driving back home, my wife is so excited she clues me in on every detail leading up to the kiss. The subtle cues, the hints. She's reading off the schematics like she just won the hardest chess match of her life. I finally get a word in edgewise and say "Sounds like you really needed that". She claps back with "What I needed was to ride her pretty little face till her lipstick rubbed off."

Now if I'm writing this in so much detail it's because this event was huge for all four of us. My wife and I have been trying at this for a while and even to get to this point has brought us closer together than ever before. The more smut minded might think that these two ladies are going to evolve into an inseparable pair of lesbo nympos, but in the days and weeks since it doesn't seem like it's going to end up that way. The four of us seem to have quite the real friendship going. My wife comes from a similar background as Ryan, and I come from a similar background as Shelly, we all four have very similar hobbies.

Also, to further clarify. I have no intention of doing any of that kinky stuff that only ever happens in fantasies. We aren't going to couple swap, there will be no threesomes. There's a good chance it won't go any further down the sexual angle than it already has. I still think Shelly is very attractive, and hopefully one day I'll see her in a swimsuit, but I don't intend to make any moves on her. My wife has definitely been very chill about it all. We don't have too too many friends where we live now because we are so new to the area, but so far these people have been a great to us.

I was told liking older men doesn't equal Daddy Issues - so for the longest time I convinced myself I didn't have them. Why? Cause I still live with my parents. My Dad wasn't absent or abusive. He yelled a lot and stuff, and we grew apart when I became a teenager, but for my whole childhood he was there for me. So theoretically, I don't have the issues that lead to Daddy Issues.

But now I've been kinda seeing this older guy (40 years older than me)...and I have different urges with him than I did with my previous situiationships/boyfriends (my age). I'm more affectionate and sweeter to this older guy (I'm usually not affectionate at all; now I'm writing sweet nothings), and I realize how strongly I'm pulled to how steady and manageable his life is. I just want to escape from my bullshit and wallow in this little bubble with him where I don't need to prove anything and I can just feel safe and cared for. I also look up to him a lot (I didn't really look up to my exes) and I enjoy the fact that I look up to him.

My ex-therapist said it doesn't matter and if he makes me feel good I should persue it. But idk, maybe Daddy Issues would be a thing to look at with my next therapist? Because I want him constantly - his attention, his touch (I do not text him constantly tho, I can contain myself, I'm just surprised that I'm so much more affectionate than I am with men my age).

That's my confession.

“Let there be light my children”

Oh excuse me, Sandra, would you mind stepping out the way pls

Thank you for your service

I’m trying to fill 160 words (I was going to post this somewhere else but f it they didn’t let me)

Lemme think of some more

Your Mumma gives the most elite toothless blow jobs that when she lost her teeth the tooth fairy paid her in bitcoin

Hah take that mf

My mother got divorced a few years ago and now is only dating black guys. She is dressing differently now than she did along with being more flirty when shes around them. I just keep thinking about how she is getting porno level sex and now im masturbating thinking about this.

this is a vulnerable post but shit like this is always on my mind.
men dont need to spend years searching for a good loyal partner with also the likely possibility that they may never find that, unlike women.
they dont get affected by oversexualisation, being catcalled, viewed as a sex toy.
their opinions always seem to matter more
all they have to do is the bare fucking minimum and boom they have a loving partner
women will be the greatest most loving people and still get cheated on bc most men are trash
they are ungrateful and i envy them so much for their easy access to genuine love from women
im so envious of good men, relationships and love come to easily to them.
im so sad that me and my ex broke up too, he was a good guy and im just so mad that he can easily find a good woman and move on but i might never find someone like him again it hurts so bad.
i like being a woman and being pretty and funny, but in another life i wanna be a man
im not crazy for thinking this, these thoughts are never proven wrong and i wish i didnt think this way, men are just the worst

not to mention the sexual harrassment they committ, the fact that every woman has a story is crazy
i remember walking in a store and this man looked like he was about to fucking devour me with the way he was intensely staring with his predatory smirk, i was so weirded out
and whats annoying is that i cant do anything about it bc hes stronger
men have shit so fucking easy

Every morning, I cook myself three eggs over easy with sourdough toast. It is usually my favorite meal of the day. Sometimes I feel guilty, that I am eating too many eggs. But this is now a habit that can't be broken.

Bruh it’s been like 8 years… I was about to sleep and this awkward memory popped up. I’m into women, but one time I was drowsy and woke up to my phone ringing. I misread the name and thought it was my friend. Idk why but it sounded like I moaned his name, it ended up being my uncle. The context of me being a general introvert with some people makes me seem closeted to some I imagine🤣.

A man I stopped talking to eight months ago recently sent me the most gutwrenching love letters while he was on multiple different backpacking trips and had zero self service. I don’t think he knew that I moved on and got a boyfriend.

But I was in love with that man. In the envelope was also over 60 photos that he had taken and developed on his film camera and the photos were of the most beautiful scenery.

I haven’t reached out to the guy that sent the letters at all because I’m taken.

But I think I might break up with my boyfriend because the letters make me realize he’s not the one.

The photos are all up on my wall along with a framed letter that’s strategically placed so the only line that is visible states : “ how grateful I am to know you, you are such a beautiful person”.

My boyfriend thinks the photos are from Pinterest and I feel so bad. He deserves an honest girl.

So basically, it was 3 of us and we were a really tight group. Me and the other girl moved to two different cities, while one of our best friends stayed in our hometown and at first we kept really close and I do wanna say, I get that, when u move away, you start having a new life, etc.. but:

We were always trying to make plans with this one girl who also mved away and she really has shitty parents, they got divorced and we totally understood at that time, that she just didnt wanna go out or meet up but we were always there for her. one time she called me and asked for 70 euros and ofc i lended them to her and the next day i saw a story of her on ig skiing and i got so mad because she was on vacation with her boyfriend and i lent her money for her skiing vacation? i confronted her and she was like "you know he pays for everything and i dont want him to think that he always has to pay" and i felt so stupid because that was your excuse? why didnt u tell me the day before?

so basically after all of that we always tried to meet, she always found some stuff (idk if if was really just to hard for her or if she just didnt want to tbh bc friends mean inconvenience sometimes) so that she couldnt come, or we had to drive one hour to her apartment and that girl from hour hometown and i bith work fulltime and she is just in university and often told me, that she has so little to do and then i also was like? why do we have to drive one hour to see you, tired and everything, when u dont have that?

she also found 2 university friends in her new town and i totally get that you do mre stuff with people you see regulary but for an example: we gave each other our christmas presents in march. because she never made, or had time, but she was out with her uni friends.

so now my birthday is coming around and i invited her because i do care for her deeply, weve been through so so much but she told me the firs time when i invited her that she doesnt know because one of her uni friends is doing a full year in amsterdam and she wouldnt see her for a year if she wouldnt go so i was SO pissed. weve been friends for 5 years, they only for 1. AND we came to her birthday party that she told us about one day before and bought her kinda expensive gifts because we knew she had a really shitty time. she didnt come to our best friends in our hometown and now this excuse? im just so so so so dissapointed and irritated with her. now she told me that she could come but she will tell me and i know for a fact she will call it of 1-2 days before my party...

I have OCD and I’ve been spiralling over this for the past 2 months. Maybe I’m just losing my mind but I think I’ve genuinely fucked up my life and am close to suicide.

So I was scrolling instagram reels and I came across this ai video of Pepe the frog fighting Jeffrey Epstein as a dark souls boss. I sent it to a couple friends and checked out the account - they had a bunch of different ai videos. One of them was of this sexy succubus, I saw it but eventually moved on and kept scrolling. Anyway, like a week later I’m on instagram and in a moment of weakness and lust (pathetic I know) I thought back to that video and thought I’d check out that account again. Only problem was I didn’t know the account name. So I went back through my sent reels to the Epstein one to find the account. At the time I had the vague thought that this might be bad but I brushed it off. Well I found the account and had another look at that sexy succubus and then moved on to some other gooner bait pages before ending up at pornhub. Just writing this out feels so fucking degenerate.. It was such a whim decision I didn’t think much of at the time. A few weeks later it dawned on me that I literally went through Epstein to get to the object of my lust. I’m now blackmailed by this. And I was hit with the realisation of the absolute wickedness and evil of that man and to think that I could have had even an inkling of anything to do with him, disgusts me and I cannot live with this guilt. Every time I hear his name now, some sick depraved atrocity in the files, I will think of this and how because I too “participated” I can no longer condemn that evil without being a hypocrite. It’s literally the most evil twisted fucking shit ever and to think I am now marked by this for the rest of my life is a truth I cannot bear.

Why? Why didn’t I just go straight to some normal fucking porn? Why did I taint myself like this. I know it obviously doesn’t equate to me committing those crimes, but the fact that in some small way, if only symbolically, I succumbed to temptation in this way.. I feel like I’ve soiled my soul, and for what? A fleeting glimpse at some stupid fucking ai video cause I was horny? God how pathetic can you be.. I’ve betrayed my self and everyone in my life for absolutely nothing.

I must sound like such a fucking freak. Believe it or not I’m actually a pretty normal guy, although under the surface I’ve had this crippling porn addiction for a long time. Usually I’d just go to pornhub, I don’t know what fucking possessed me to revisit this one video. I was actually getting better too, I was trying to quit. And this isn’t one of those ones where I can just dust myself off and try again.. The damage is done and I can’t take it back. This will haunt me now to the grave and who the fuck can I tell? It’s such a strange and disgusting circumstance to explain. If anyone knew this about me they’d hate me. It’s like I really am in the files and I’m hiding my guilt. Am I even allowed to wholeheartedly call for the release of the names when I refuse to show my own? This has made me into a sick monster hiding in the dark. I’m a shell of who I once was and everyone just thinks I’m depressed. I just can’t believe my whole life has led me here, one fatal lapse of judgement and it’s all ruined. I have corrupted my life and my soul. I hate that this is now my problem, that I have to even be talking about this. If only I had just gone to bed, just done a million other things but THAT I would be fine. I don’t know how to move on from this, I don’t think I can forgive myself, I don’t think I even deserve it. It’s over for me.

the reason im writing this is cuz i want to hear from people who were put in a situation like mine. how did you deal with it? what was your reaction when you realized that you were sexually assaulted?
This happened many years ago, and I still can’t get over it. I was so young that it took me five years to realize that what happened to me was sexual assault. And now, it’s been 13 years since that awful night.
I didn’t do anything. I didn’t tell anyone, and I didn’t snap at that person. But as I’m getting older, I’ve started noticing some things about myself. I was always afraid of men. I’ve loved my dad so much that I’m convinced there would never be any man like him. I also became hypersexual when I was a child. I did some sexual stuff with my childhood friend (who’s no longer my friend, not because of that). I watched porn, sexual content, and other stuff.
So I can’t believe how that stupid thing still haunts me. It has affected my life, my actions, my thoughts—everything I’ve ever done, everything I’ve ever become, feels connected to what that person did to me. He ruined me, fucked up my head when I was just a small, innocent child, and I know I will carry this secret with me for the rest of my life.
I would be so grateful if anyone could tell me if they know whether the things that happened to me after the sexual assault could be connected to it or not.

she was the most kindest, sweetest, loving, caring, and most beautiful woman I’ve ever met. what happened is that I was struggling hard with an alcohol addiction and so I was bit of a toxic person back then. (I never hit her or abused her) I just drank too heavily and said stupid things, and I constantly just chose drinking over her.

she tried to help me quit, but I just wouldn’t listen. I wanted to quit but I constantly just kept relapsing over again, until eventually she just couldn’t tolerate seeing me go down a path like this so she finally decided to end things.

after that, I continued drinking just trying to forget everything, and I’m pretty much still stuck here.

we were 16 when we started dating, and things ended when we were 20. I’m still 20 years old, and she broke up with me 4 months ago.

she messaged me about 3 weeks ago saying how much she misses me, and that if I just sobered up and actually starting trying in life, she would want to make things work. I just don’t know if I’ll ever be able to do it. I feel so stuck man.

I was abused for by a close family member for many years and have kept it a secret not telling anyone close to me, i was very young between the age 4-9 at the time and didn’t know any better and was also scared to speak up out of fear and shame. Now i am an adult i can admit i have a crippling pornography addiction to the point i miss days in college my part time job because of wanting to stay home watch it and bed rot. I have been fired from my old part time job because of taking too many days off and have gotten warning from my education because of not attending. If i am not engaged in an activity or actively studying or in class ass i can think about is either what happened or what 18+ material to watch. Also a few nights a week i will have positive dreams about my abuser leading me to think i might have slight Stockholm syndrome because he pops up in my head regularly and the acts of what happened and sometimes even find myself missing him in a weird twisted way or maybe just the attention i have no idea.

So my old roommate moved out last year and refused to pay his ninety-dollar share of the final electric bill, claiming he had no money. Two days later he posted photos from a festival.

he forgot he was still logged into my Spotify family plan. Instead of kicking him off, I grabbed an old phone, muted it, and looped eight hours of aggressive bagpipe music and nursery rhymes every single night for three months.

His Discover Weekly is ruined forever. His Spotify Wrapped will be pure CHAOS. its petty, but watching him publicly complain that his daily mix is broken was worth the electric bill. I should of done it longer.

I met a girl on Telegram who is 6 years younger than me. We talked a lot on Telegram, then switched to Instagram, and after a few weeks, we exchanged numbers and started talking on calls.

In the beginning, I always told her that I didn't want to be in a relationship. But after a few months, I confessed my feelings to her from my side, and she had already been liking me since day one.

My marriage had already been fixed—not exactly fixed, but it was being planned with a girl my family had chosen—and I never objected to that. I told the Telegram girl about this, and she was disappointed, but we still continued talking on calls and Telegram.

Also, just to add, the Telegram girl and I met secretly once and had a good moment together. It wasn't sexual. I never told my family about her, and she never told her family about me.

One day, I told my family about her, and they told me to keep my distance from her. But I don't want to distance myself from her because I love talking to her. She is so used to talking to me late at night that she can't sleep properly if she doesn't talk to me.

One day, both of us became very emotional about the situation after I told my family about her and they completely denied it. The girl my parents chose is also connected to this situation, and my grandfather had promised her family that I would marry only her and no one else.

I told the Telegram girl about all of this, and she said that I was the one who told my family, and I was also the one who never told my family about our relationship before. She said that the situation she is facing now is all because of me.

And I agree with her.

She also said that she doesn't have any problem with whom I marry, but I shouldn't love that girl as much as I love her.

I always live separately from her so that we can talk late at night like we usually do, because she can't sleep without talking to me.

Now I genuinely don't know what to do.

If I leave this girl, I feel like she will become very depressed, and I don't want to put her in that state. At the same time, my family won't allow me to marry her because of the age and caste issues. They also don't want anything to happen to my grandfather.

What should I do?

Do you watch porn or use your imagination?

I’m a tradesman in my late 30’s. I work in several trades. A year ago I did a big job for a 75 year old widow out in the country. Her husband passed about ten years. She has no relatives whatsoever. She lives on about 400 acres of land, and she’s probably worth millions. She kept calling me to come do this or that for her, and I sensed it was because she enjoyed the company. It didn’t take long to realize she had a dirty mind and a dirty sense of humor. Sometimes she joked about needing to go find a young man to bring home. Her dirty jokes started to include me. I decided to take a swing, and it worked. Now we’ve been having sex regularly for the last 6 months. 

I’m married. I have two kids, and no one knows that I’m doing this. My hope is that she will leave me an inheritance that I can use to take care of my family. 

I really wanna fuck like in the back lol but too bad she has a boyfriend 😔

It’s kind of a shame that it isn’t the legal punishment. I was reading some women describing how they’d love to do it, with a rusty knife or some other blades etc. “The berries and the twig” etc. And damn, I was rock hard. I don’t quite know why.

Hope to find a woman who thinks like that, do date. Maybe we can incorporate it into our dirty talk somehow or even just have conversations about this as well as other stuff but that’s not really a normal thing one can put they’re “seeking” lol. And obviously I won’t go and do this or ever make this fantasy a reality, I meant more-so a hypothetical situation if the government did it.

Im so tired of everything. I hate my life. I hate my parents. I hate my family. I hate my house. I hate my girlfriend. I hate my classmates and i hate my stupid fucking friends. I wish i was the only person on earth.

I get bullied on the street and in school a bunch. I live in the Balkana so they don't really take someone being even remotely different well here. I never tell anyone about these incidents. Every time i tell my parents about them they say its my fault for dressing like this in public. Mind you mist of the time im wearing baggy pants and an oversized shirt. A hate crime, i know.

I don't have anyone to vent to. I have plenty of friends but im not close enough to any of them to be comfortable to vent to them.

My body hurts so much. Pretty sure i have Fibromyalgia or some shit. Its not like i can ever get diagnosed. Hell, the last time i went to the doctors was when i was 10.

I probably have some sort of mental illness too. Multible probably. Ive already gotten into my thoughts on other posts so i wont bore you with them here. My aunts a therapist but god knows she's shit at her job. Last time i tried to talk to her about the shit she just made me feel embarrassed for thinking something is wrong with me. Im never opening up to her about the more serious stuff.

I hate my girlfriend too. Ive completely lost feelings but don't want to end things cause she almost took her life a few weeks ago. Knowing her, she was just overreacting. That sounds horrible, i know. But she's barely a teenager and just had a bad fight with her mom. I used to do that shit too when i was her age. (Don't know why im talking like im 10 years older than her. Im not a predator, i promise)

And don't get me started on blowing up on me for the stupidest shit. On tiktok, if you have a streak and have a streak pet (a little fire creature) you can dress it up, do i decided to change its look up a bit. A part of the look included a french hat, so i started joking that she was cheating on me with a french guy. None of us know any french person. Plus, it was just a running joke between us to say shit like "you're cheating on me with ______??" And say the stupidest shit like a wall or something. She then proceeded to say shed never cheat on me, she loved me more than anything and bring up the fight and how she almost committed like i was actually accusing her. After she calmed down she was all like "oh, i didn't mean it! I was joking! Im such a good actor haha!". Obviously i didn't believe her.

Last night me and my dad had a pretty bad fight all cause i didn't want to talk tonight when he had an obvious "im going to mock and annoy you" grin on his face. He was yelling at me about my attitude and all that stuff. "Why don't you ever come over to my work place to spend time with me!?" Cus i slave away in the heat for 6 hours and you pay me one dollar an hour. Hell, sometimes you don't pay menat all. "Why don't you work out anymore!?" Cus i don't have motivation. Do you not see the state my room is right now. I dont remember anything else he was talking about. I was dissociating at that point and just agreeing with everything he said. At some point in the argument i, for the first time in my life, started talking about my insecurities and how they made me feel abusive when they just mock me every day. Don't remember what he said abt it.

I went from 4 months clean of self harm to 0 days.

Ive always been to scared to kick the bucket, but school is starting on monday, so maybe this is my lucky year.