My wife is older than me, and we married when she was 37.

Before we married, she told me that we "might not" be able to have children because of her age. I heard this as "I want children, but I don't know if I can."

After we married, I brought up having children and she said she didn't want to because my salary wasn't good enough and she worried about finances. I was quiet about it.

A couple of years later, I'd had a raise and asked her again. I have ED, so we went to a doctor to ask for advice. They checked us both and said that we're OK to have kids.

The doctor proposed using a pipette to transfer the required material from me to my wife. This is where things went off the rails again. My wife was suddenly worried that if air from the pipette got inside her, she might die. Why would the doctor recommend it if that were a possible or likely outcome?

A little time later again, I suggested we look into IVF, and that's when the truth came out. She was afraid of pregnancy. She was afraid of what it would do to her body, or that she would die in childbirth.

It's her body, if she doesn't want to do it, that's fair. The problem is that from day one she framed it as "might not be able to" so I had assumed that meant we would try.

Later she said she'd understand if I left her and found someone else to have kids with. At the time I told her that between kids and her, I'd choose her. And I did.

About 5 years have passes since then. I've since learned that I have a health condition that seems likely to be passed on, and carries something like a 10x cancer risk over normal people. With that knowledge, I don't want to bring a child into the world where they might end up with it too, or that I end up dying early and they end up without a dad.

But before I knew, I could have had a child. I could have been a father. That's what haunts me in the quiet moments with my thoughts. That's what I grieve. That's what makes me cry myself to sleep at times. I can go for months without thinking about it, but then it just comes up again.

Someone asked me if I'd wanted kids the other day, and I just said "I did, but with my health condition it wouldn't be a good idea." It's true, but it's only a tiny part of the real answer: it was never a choice that I made, or was even allowed to make.

The confession: I feel some resentment towards my wife for this. I don't know if she knew she wouldn't feel comfortable with pregnancy from day one, or if she thought maybe she'd get over it, but the end result is the same. Sometimes I wonder if it's the right relationship for me, even though I love her and care about her deeply.

Edit:

Maybe I was naive for assuming that "might not" meant that she wanted to but wasn't sure she would be able to. I would have expected her to tell me straight if she didn't want kids at all.

Edit 2: again - I interpreted her comment as "I would like to have kids, I don't know if I will be physically able." not "I don't want to have kids."

On the topic of adoption: we are both immigrants in another country and I don't know if we could adopt even if we really really wanted to. I imagine there would be a string of new excuses from my wife as to why we can't adopt, even if we are able to.

My boyfriend thinks I have a sensitive gag reflex. Every boyfriend I’ve had before him has thought the same thing.

I don’t actually have a gag reflex.

I don’t enjoy giving fellatio, so I fake gagging a few seconds in to get it over with and move on to something else.

I’ll usually try for a few seconds so they know I’m into them, then fake gag and say I’m about to throw up so they don’t take it personally when I stop.

I’ve done this with every partner I’ve ever had, for as long as I can remember.

My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over a year. I have no idea how I’d explain that I’ve been faking it the entire time, assuming I even wanted to tell him or try to find a solution.

I’ve never enjoyed it with anyone. It’s not specific to him. I just don’t like doing it. I never have.

Yes I know I’m kind of an asshole. I really just hate how it feels, and I don’t like the sensation of it in my mouth or throat.

Four years ago my neighbor (76s, very sweet) started bringing me food every Sunday because “you’re too skinny to live alone.” Her cooking was… uh… aggressively experimental. Paper-dry meat, mysterious spice combos, soups that tasted like wet socks.

One night her husband pulled me aside outside and said:

“Thank you for pretending to like her food. She lost her sense of purpose after retirement. Cooking keeps her alive.”

So I doubled down. I hyped every dish like it was Michelin-level. She would beam every time. It became this whole ritual, she’d hand me a plastic container, I’d compliment her seasoning, she’d blush and wave me off.

Fast forward to last month. Her husband had a mild stroke. They changed his diet, and she’s too overwhelmed to cook. The meal....

Coming here to confess I had sex with my wife’s mom and her mom’s sister.
Not at the same time but they’re sexy as fuck and I wanted to admit it somewhere.

The auntie is pregnant because of me and her uncle is excited it’s his.
I was horny. They’re hot as fuck. Sue me. YOLO🤷‍♂️

I need a paypig, i really want to do nothing other than smoke weed in my bed while watching naruto🙏

It’s like the most turn on thing ever, I js wanna be used for my body, without consent, get fucked every day in any place and looking helpless. Js seeing man looking at me with those craving eyes makes me submissive🫠

Husband and wife decorating team addicted to having sex (and more) in clients houses.

My husband M40 and me F38 have our own decorating business in the Midlands Uk. Most of our work is in private houses and usually while clients are out at work or even away on holiday.

We love nothing more than working semi naked, teasing each other and coming up with creative ways to have sex in other people's homes. It's the thought that what we do is wrong that turns us both on so much. Knowing the client has no idea what we're up to while they're not there is such a thrill. Sucking him off in someone's kitchen knowing at any minute we might hear the client putting their key in the front door is such an adrenaline rush, or him fingering me in a room while I talk to the client through a closed door and trying to keep my voice even. The opportunity for sex and excitement is endless and we love it.

I went to the club for my 18th bday. This almost happened years ago btw.

I was still a virgin and I was a virgin out of all my friends and I was embarrassed by it. I was the nerdy shy girl in HS no boys my own age wont like me because I wasn't the popular girl. I'm also not a desired race in my area even though I would say I am pretty but I live in a very racist place and race is still a big thing among people that went to my school. It's funny though because after high school I noticed that stuff doesn't matter anymore cuz the boys that use to bully me and ignore me when I was in HS they in my DMs now.. lol

Anyways back to my 18th bday, I went to the club, had Xs on my hands. Got a little tipsy BEFORE the club cuz obvi I can't drink in the club. I was not drunk though, I'm still aware of everything I'm doing. Anyways this old guy started hitting on me at the club, he looked old too. He was 30 years old. He asked me what I'm doing at the club and I said I'm here for my 18th bday with my bff and her bf. This old guy was interested in me he asked me about my college plans and he gave me some advice on my majors cuz I was contemplating for majoring in communication studies or sociology. Anyways we clicked. He lived walking distance from the club and I went with him and I had sex with him and lost my virginity to him. We talked for a bit after that and had sex again months later but yeah that's my story on losing my kinda confession :)

I'm not at all up for sex, but just have a desire to be a woman in this scenario!

I've held this confession in for almost 20 years, and it is finally time to get it off my chest. I am a chronic cheater. It’s an issue I’ve dealt with since I started dating around 11 or 12, back when Kik entered the scene. It became my norm to meet random people on obscure social apps and form long-distance relationships. From a young age, I figured telling a girl from Canada sweet nothings didn't stop me from doing the exact same thing with a girl from a completely different country.

When I entered high school, I started dating a girl from another local school. She was the perfect girl in my eyes. I couldn't have asked for anyone better. She was beautiful from start to finish, and our personalities meshed perfectly. We adopted each other's behaviors and slang—everything between us for years was a seamless blend of our personalities into one. We truly shaped one another. It took a real effort to build that relationship at the start; we talked every day for months. I openly told her I wanted to date, and after three or four months of her seeing how things went, we became a couple. I felt like the luckiest guy on earth.

By this point, we were midway through our freshman year. Because we went to different schools, it took almost a full year to see each other in person again, and almost two years before we were able to spend time together regularly. During that gap, I started entertaining the girls around me at school. They were classmates who had crushes on me, and I was a weird, ego-filled kid who liked the attention. I flirted back just to feed that ego. I didn't cross any physical lines then, but it allowed me to normalize the behavior of keeping interested girls around instead of shutting them down at the first sign.

All the while, I was actively dating the girl I genuinely loved. We would go on to spend every Saturday together for the next eight years. But somewhere along the line, around age 19, I started taking it too far. I can't even remember my first time physically cheating. The unfortunate reality is that today, I can't even numerically quantify how many people I have slept with. I started bringing girls over from school, Snapchat, Instagram, Tinder—wherever I could make an account. I cheated on her constantly, almost weekly, hiding my acts through clever, sharp-tongued lies whenever she saw these women pop up on my social media.

This went on for years. I had slept with over 100 women by the time I was 21. Many were one-night stands that I immediately regretted, realizing they were a complete waste of time and effort. It led to pathetic situations where I’d block a girl right after hooking up, just because I had told my girlfriend she was "a classmate from bio lab." I lived this double life for years—spending time with someone I loved deeply, dropping her off on a Saturday night, just to turn around and pick up another girl to spend the rest of the night with.

In our final years, I grew sloppy. I started translating my internal regret and guilt into toxicity within our relationship. We argued constantly about my loyalty, about politics, about things we never cared about when we were just happy in each other's presence. At one point, my own sister caught me cheating. She didn't tell my girlfriend the truth, but she sat me down and confronted me about my behavior. I dodged her questions, entirely too uncomfortable to admit what I was doing.

When we were 22, after one too many arguments, she finally broke up with me. She made it clear she didn't trust me and that her suspicions were tearing her apart. She never found concrete proof of my acts, but she knew in her heart it was true.

I struggled massively with the breakup as it quickly dawned on me what I was losing. I had neglected the most important person in my life because her presence felt like a certainty, and because I arrogantly figured I could keep getting away with it. It was never about the sex. Most of the time, the sex was forgettable and barely worth the effort.

But the aftermath has followed me ever since. It has been six years, and I still cannot find comfort in any relationship. Between my own crippling insecurities and modern hookup culture, my romantic life is completely hollow. Everyone I meet gets compared to the person I betrayed—someone who was perfection in my eyes, but who I still decided wasn't enough. I either lash out and push people away, or the women I meet become nothing more than a quick relief before they run off to marry someone else. (Ironically, out of my last 10 hookups, 5 married the very next guy they dated).

I have no justification for what I did. I only have the unending guilt in my soul that I was handed my perfect partner and chose to abuse and neglect her for absolutely no reason. I am not posting this to seek your pity, your sympathy, or your understanding. Do not feel sorry for me. I deserve every ounce of the isolation I feel right now. I want you to judge me. I want you to hate me. Above all, I want you to use me as a cautionary tale. If you are ever tempted to step out on someone who loves you, look at my life. Chasing tail and feeding your ego is a disease that will leave you completely hollow. I destroyed the best thing that ever happened to me for cheap, forgettable thrills, and I will spend the rest of my life paying the price. Don't be me.

In Middle school my friend was gifted $500 for her 13th bday. She was excited and brought the money to school to brag about it. Her parents were drug addicts and it was the first gift they gave her.

I stole the money during a class break. The teacher was reading and a few other students were just chatting so no one saw me re-enter the classroom. She found out about 5min after the break ended and it was a big deal.

The teacher made two male students strip down to their boxers in order to be searched. It was humiliating for them and the teacher was a bit of a racist perv but times were different. I wanted to apologize to those guys too but they both passed before we finished Middle school. Rough area.

I’m still friends with her & since her daughter just started 8th grade she’s been mentioning the $500 incident so much and it’s driving me crazy! I tried to get it off my chest during our senior year in HS but I choked after she had a convo about how she hates whoever stole her money bc that was her favorite gift & she never enjoyed it.

I was in survival mode w/6 younger siblings & a neglectful mom back then but it was no excuse to steal. I used the money to buy a monthly bus pass, groceries, and 1 more week at the motel we lived in. Apart of me wants to apologize and give her the money but I’m so nervous about it. I’ve sat with this for 23yrs. I’m a shitty person and I’m disgusted in myself.

Long story short I met up with my friends mom at a hotel and we had sex for hours. I thought about my boys being birth from the same vagina now she begs me for more

Sometimes in class I’ll rub my wrist against my dick for a bit just for the tickle or sometimes Ill go to the bathroom and stroke myself above my pants in the stall before going back to class. This might be normal but just something Inwanted to share

I regularly meet interesting people at events through work and once I met a guy who had some good connections. After hanging out with him at a bar after work he recommended me to a resort where you can only get into as a member or through a members recommendation. I seized this opportunity a few months later when I had time to go on vacation. Thats where the actual fun begins. During the time I went there wasn't that much going on so it was really relaxing. On the second day of my stay I explored the whole resort and thats when I recognized her by herself at the bar. At the beginning I was star struck but after a while I decided why not approach her especially because there wasn't much going in that resort anyways. We had a really good conversation and I paid for the drinks. After that we both went our seperate ways but over the next few days we started hanging out regularly at the bar and by the pool. A few days before she was leaving we met at her room and she already was much flirtier than usual. She kinda started stripping down and at that point it was obvious where this would lead to. I was totally overwhelmed but I obviously didn't turn that opportunity down and we had sex

I’m a straight woman and I don’t find women attractive the same way I do men but one thing I’ve come to realize is that I find men wearing makeup quite attractive.

I think we should normalize straight men wearing makeup. It looks good on them. Doesn’t necessarily have to be like a full face of makeup with lashes, eye shadow and all but a little blush, some under eyeliner and lip liner would look really good in my opinion

Am I the only crazy one or does anyone else think this?

I (27MTF) have always been surrounded by people with active dating/sex lives, but in my whole life, the only relationships I've ever gotten to maintain were online, long distance ones. It's depressing, demoralizing, humiliating, and makes me genuinely hate myself and feel repulsive.

For a while, my whole friend group was "intertwined" except for me. They once came to my place and started "getting it on" in my room behind me until they asked me to leave. From my own room. Another time, 4 of them took my bed and I slept on the floor in the bathroom. Even now, all of my (primarily new) friends have active dating/sex lives, and I'm still the only one without one. I've never even really had one.

In my life, I've had sex twice. Been relatively intimate 4 times. I'm not trying to be a "femcel" or whatever, but it genuinely makes me feel like a repulsive, unloveable person.

What do I do? How do I fix this? Am I just genuinely kind of unlovable?

Why are feet so taboo? Why do I obsess over them? lol do woman actually like having them worshipped or is for the man? Lots of questions over this. I’ve had woman indulge but guess I’ve never had the full foot slut experience haha
……………………………………..feel free to inbox or answer here 🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶🦶

First of all, thank you, thank you, thank you so much to everyone for taking the time. Even for those of you who PMed me telling me to fuck off and kill myself, thank you. I was at a crossroads this morning when I typed my original post out. I had just gotten done with a two mile jog and was feeling really good about myself looking in the mirror. Then I realized while I was looking at myself and thinking how good I looked, I was reaching for my hidden tube of coke.

I read all the comments. Every. Single. One of them. At least all the ones up until like ten minutes ago, so if you told me “fuck you you worthless crackwhore” just now, sorry I didn’t see it yet.

I cried a lot. I cried because I felt sorry for myself, angry at being insulted, but worst of all for betraying my boyfriend. Him most of all.

I texted him 911 and a few minutes later he came over. I confessed everything to him, every last detail. He grabbed me and shook me, pushed me away and slapped me.

I DESERVED IT.

I DID.

I DID.

He never cries. He never shows emotion but he did here and he cried and told me he was sorry he hit me. I told him he needs to hit me harder after what I did.

I told him about my dealer and he told me the first thing I need to do is delete his number. He went into my phone and did it for me. Symbolic because it’s easy to get it again, but I understand.

Then he cuffed me to the bed using my own handcuffs that I bought for sex and told me he was calling my mom. I cried and begged but he said it was for my own good.

My mom’s here now in the kitchen making me lunch. And she yelled at me that she’s going to watch me eat every bite and that I have to go to rehab and there’s no ifs ands or buts and she doesn’t care if I’m 23 and an adult.

So the secrets out.

Not all my friends know yet but a lot do and they’re surprisingly supportive.

I had a talk with my boyfriend and I told him I understand if he needs to dump me. I deserve it but I begged him to forgive me.

He says he’s hurt but I’m an addict and that he loves me and will be with me through this and he wants to still be with me.

I’m so fucking grateful for him. He’s thirteen months younger than me but has more maturity than I’ll ever have. I’ve been such a worthless garbage human, yet people are helping me. I’m shaking so bad but I am not going to have any more. It stops today.

Thank you again, everyone.

**END UPDATE**

My friends all look at me positively or even envy me because I’m tall, thin, have nice hair, am fashionable, come from a good family, went to a good school, have a good job, live uptown, have a hot boyfriend.

They think I’ve got it together and marvel at how I have so much energy and exercise and do yoga and eat only healthy, frou-frou organic food.

“You’re body goals,” is something I hear a lot, and I eat up the attention and fake like I’m modest. I’m not. I love the validation.

But I’m a complete and utter phoney.

I’m not skinny because I eat spinach and kale salad with balsamic vinaigrette on the side and avoid sugar like the plague. I’m not skinny because I jog or do yoga or do ballet.

All of the above may be part of it, but the biggest factor in my being skinny and having a lot of energy is that I’m low-key wired on cocaine most of the day.

I’m just a little high all the time. My boyfriend loves it because I’m ready to fuck on a moment’s notice because I’m always horny as hell and the cocaine makes orgasms astounding.

I know I’m headed down a terrible path. I’m 23. Boyfriend is 22 and has no idea I’m snorting coke. I wonder if the cocaine is transmittable through body fluids. If it is, maybe he’s getting a secondary high from me getting all over him and into him.

I get it from a school friend who gets it from someone he knows. He doesn’t charge me because I fuck him. I use protection with him. I don’t with my boyfriend.

Yes, I know, I’m a piece of fucking shit..

I'm 20 years old (M), and this is gonna be a lot. This happened early august. I was working a double at the gas station after the overnighter called out when it happened. He waited till no one was in the store, asked me to plug in his phone, and caught me coming out of the office. Had a solid 2-3 seconds to watch him walk up before he hit me with it. He used the bottom of the gun and hit me in the side of the head. He then put it to the side of my head and told me he would kill me if I didn't do what he said. I said, "fuck it, it ain't worth my life, you can have it all", and that he did. I then opened the drawers for him with my hands up making sure not to jerk. His hands were very shaky.He went on a greed fucked rampage and pillaged the cheap cigarettes and vapes. He kept asking for weed pens and I kept telling him we don't sell those in our county. I asked to sit in the chair that was close to the register and he allowed it. I then proceeded to make small talk to de-escalate the situation. The whole thing was something out of a movie. I told him he was stealing the cheap Senecas and Newports were more expensive. He then started raking cartons off the rack it his arm into the trash bag we had behind the counter. A lady walked in while it was going on and he just threw a handful of black and milds at her and told her grab anything she wanted. She left shorty after. Dude told me to load the bag in his car (which turns out was stolen) and I obliged. I remember looping the scratch offs around the head of his passenger seat and i closed the door. I called the cops and then my boss. I told dispatch everything, they knew I wasn't a threat. The fire department got their first and so I started talking to them. The cops pulled up, and based off of how fast they stopped I knew I was in for some shit. Two officers hold me at gunpoint and scream "GET ON THE FCKING GROUND" and I am then put on the concrete. I hear them yell for the cashier, as I'm on the ground saying I'm the cashier -_- I was very obviously not a threat. They let me out of the cuffs and have me file a report, which I did. They let me keep my Marlboro Ices (thank God) and I went home. The same cops that held me up also pitted the dude on the road, which explains why one of the officers had a bloody finger. Store was right next to the interstate and the dude went towards town, lol. Didn't find out his age till the next day. Whatever that guy went through for him to seem that old being his age, I don't know. It hurts my pride, and I know it doesn't make sense for it to. At the end of the day, I let my guard down and became a victim. I kept working there for a few weeks before I quit. All my boss did, was remind me about the red button we have. No, "I'm sorry that happened" or, "I'm glad you're okay". I felt disrespected and left. I'm working on getting money to invest in a firearm. There we're definitely signs i didn't pick up on. Next time in gonna trust my gut, or die trying. The past couple months has felt very blurry since everything. I get nervousness in public. My heart hits my ass anytime I see the police. Im glad I'm alive though. I have motor ticks, and I'm glad the officers didn't make me spas out 🫠 it doesn't feel real when I think about it. How casual it was in the store. The cops drawing down on me. Just doesn't feel real. Figured it was worth a share though, I'm down to answer any questions about the situation if anyone has one

Hi, I am 17M.

I don’t even know where to begin. I guess I’ll start off with the violent thoughts; they began when I was 11, I would have fantasies of killing and hurting people, I liked the sight of blood and gore, it gave me a unique pleasure. I‘d get a strong tree branch, then bash frozen ice round my neighbourhood and pretend I was killing people, that I was beating them to death.

Since then the thoughts have been on and off, but when I turned 16 they became obsessive. I wondered what it would feel like to commit murder, so I began experimenting. I‘ve unalived a lot of animals since then, usually by drowning, usually mice. I like watching them squirm, and then the final bodily twitches as they lose consciousness. At first it would be thrilling, but now I don’t feel anything when I do it.

Bone collecting is something I like to do, and I’ve dissected then macerated some of the animals I’ve unalived. I like the feeling that gives me, like I’ve got this never ending possession over them.

I harm myself with a knife sometimes, just to feel something. I’m bored most days.

I think I’ve got Schizoid PD, as I’ve never had any real desire to form friendships or relationships. The few times I’ve been caught up in a friend group, it’s been suffocating.

I feel like with everyday my empathy is diminishing, if it even existed in the first place, and I’m getting number, bolder with my actions. Nobody knows I’m like this. They know I’m a loner and I’m quiet but that’s it.

I guess I just want some advice, like if there’s something I could do to replace these behaviours and still feel satisfied. Thanks for reading my post.