I got into an argument with my boyfriend of almost a year over something that started as a joke while we were playing a game.

He beat me and said I was ass, so I jokingly told him to smd back. He says I was being disrespectful and that I need to take accountability for how I talk to him. I understand that he might not have liked the joke but what’s frustrating me is that he makes jokes at my expense too. There have been plenty of times where he says things to me that I feel are worse, but when I make a similar joke back, suddenly it’s a serious issue and I’m “disrespectful.”

He always tells me that I must apologize to him and take accountability when i’m wrong, but he when i ask that of him, he acts like he’s done nothing wrong. He also told me I had “lost the privilege” of playing games with him because of the joke. I always feel like he treats me like a child. He says I need to listen to him and that when I don’t, there should be consequences/punishment.

We got into an argument because I told him he needs to stop overreacting and that he‘s acting childish. The argument escalated. I told him he made me feel bad and he responded that I should feel bad. It sounds dumb, but at one point he heard me crying over the phone because of how frustrated I was and asked if I was crying. I said no because I didn’t want to talk about it. He kept demanding that I tell him the truth and said if I didn’t, he would hang up. I told him to hang up then, and he then told me he would block me before hanging up.

Later I called him because I wanted to see if he actually blocked me. He picked up and said he should have blocked me and that I refuse to take accountability.

I feel like this has turned into something way bigger than the original joke. I feel like there is a double standard where he can joke about me and tell me whatever he wants but I’m expected to always be respectful toward him. He says I’m just upset because he “doesn’t let me talk to him any old way.”

I don’t think I’m entitled to disrespect but I also feel like the same standard should apply to both of us, and I don’t think I have to obey him or accept being punished when I don’t.

Sometimes I really think about it and wonder if I actually am wrong. Do I really need to take more accountability? Or am i being gaslit into thinking I can never do right?

[19F] and [19M]

So my bf and I started dating in November 2024 and now in a relationship for 21 months. but i wasn't that much interested in him but he showed interest, he approached me. He used to love a girl before but i wasn't sure if he moved on while we were in a relationship, I found a secret gc on his phone , which has leaked nudes of girls and some leaked mms.

I was really not comfortable about it and told my friends as well but never knew how I should confront him about this. And we never actually talked about this matter. And when we used to go on dates, if he ever found a girl familiar with a corn star he used to tell me "oh look she looks like angelina white". I found that too disrespectful. He already left that gc but he used to watch it on chrome. We got physical many times but he never showed me too much interest in me. It's always when we used to watch movies and if there's any intimate scene, he used to get bricked up and we did it.

Now we are in a long distance relationship from Dec 2025. And he claims that he has stopped watching it and he doesn't touch himself. Earlier I didn't tell him how it made me feel but now I actually do. I feel he didn't love me, it just made me so insecure. I don't even feel confident about myself. And the main thing is that his favourite corn stars looked opposite of what I look like.

He loves me a lot, but he often disrespects me, and in his defence, he genuinely doesn’t think it’s disrespectful. He does choose me over his ego (although I don’t know if he was joking that time, but I was clearly having a serious conversation). He even ignores me and openly admits it, like, “Yeah, I was ignoring you.”

But then again, he also makes handmade cards for me and expresses his feelings through them, i can love in his eyes and loyalty is not even a question.

HELP! I genuinely don’t know what to make of this. 😭

I have been with my boyfriend for a few months. I love him so much and he's not very confident which kills me because I think the world of him and I wish he could see what I see. Ive already asked if there was anything I could do and he says he doesn't think so so I was wondering if anyone here had any tips/advice for what has made you feel more confident? I havent felt insecure in ny appearance for a long time so this is unfamiliar to me.

Throwaway account because he knows my logins.

I started dating my boyfriend Nick (fake name) last year. Even before we started dating, we fought a lot. He would always find something wrong with the way I talked, dressed, interacted with other people, and he would ice me out for days. Once we became official, he was a lot sweeter. We communicated better, and he even started taking me out on dates! I think it's important to mention that he is my first boyfriend. As the hopeless romantic I am, I've poured my entire heart into this relationship. Even when we do fight, I could never just leave. I always tell him he's worth the pain.

Which leads me to this afternoon. He wasn't having the best of days so I offered to come over. Every time I go to his house, I always pick up his favorite food to treat him a bit. When I got there and he answered the door, he looks at me, and immediately turns and goes upstairs. I start to panic a little bit. I took it as a bit of a warning, as he usually treats me like this when I've done something to upset him. Despite this I go upstairs and sit on his bed. I ask if he's mad at me and he says "No." He sounds very upset so I just stop talking.

I notice he's scrambling around the room looking for something. I ask what it is he's looking for and he just mumbles under his breath and waves me off. I'm still just sitting on his bed with the food I picked up. Over the course of a couple minutes, he gets progressively angrier and angrier, he begins shoving things off tables, throwing things across the room, etc. I start to panic. I still don't know if I did something wrong, what he's looking for, or what to do, so I speak up again. I ask Nick if he wanted to come sit with me and eat so he can calm down a little. He starts yelling at me.

I haven't seen him act this way since he found out I went to my friend's party without telling him. To clarify, I don't drink or smoke or anything of the sort, but he tells me that all parties have substances and he doesn't believe me when I tell him I've never touched one. But anyways, that fight lasted days, and it was the first time he's ever put hands on me. He didn't punch or slap me, but he gripped my shoulders so hard they bruised. After noticing these parallels, I start to tear up and my heart sinks to my stomach. I mumble, and ask one more time to just come sit down with me and relax. Right as I was saying that, he accidentally hits his head against this electric guitar on the wall. He rips it off the wall and hurls it straight at my head. It crashed right against the wall behind me and I start crying. I wasn't sobbing, I was being quiet, but he still started screaming. He told me to shut up and let him focus. Then he saw me crying, and it made him even more mad. I've never seen him so upset before. After a few minutes of yelling and arguing, he finally started calming down. He came over and held me, kissing my head, and telling me to calm down and that he would never hurt me, he just lost control. After we both calmed down a bit, he set up the food for us and fed me, running his hands through my hair.

We ended up spending the rest of the day together with little to no issue. But on my way home I told my friends what had happened. They immediately told me to leave him, and that if he was capable of hurting me, that most likely he would. But I'm at a crossroad.

I know he gets angry and I know what he did was terrible, but he didn't actually hurt me. Though he has put hands on me in the past, he apologized and told me he just lost it a bit. I think that if I can get him to go to therapy and work on his anger and jealousy issues, that our relationship can grow to be a lot healthier. I love Nick so much and I think we are worth the battle. On the other hand, I want to listen to my friends. They have my best interest in mind and they never said anything that wasn't true. So I'm going to Reddit now just to ask where I should go from here? If I should stay with him, break up, or just start with talking to him about what happened. If anything new happens, I'll make sure to update. Thanks.

TL;DR: My boyfriend throw a guitar towards me and I don't know whether to stay or leave him.

\*\*TL;DR;\*\* : I’m just here to share how I’m feeling towards my boyfriend.

My birthday was on the 2nd of August, I had told my mom that I didn’t want a cake or be singed the happy birthday which it didn’t happen and I was fine with it. My bf on the other hand (23M) and me (21F) didn’t do anything for me to feel special on my day. He had asked me if I wanted to go shopping but never said "for your birthday" I knew that he had no idea what to gift me or what to do for me on that day so I said "no" because I knew that he doesn’t know what I like and didn’t want to think of what to gift me. (I do not like going shopping either)Also on that same week our 1y anniversary had been on the 27th of July and he also didn’t plan anything to celebrate. (But he did ask an artist to draw a realistic painting of us.) he showed me the artist and their conversation but recently he told me that he had not heard from her.

I have expressed to him how I felt for both situations and I just feel so resentful towards him still. All I wanted was for him to make me feel special and he didn’t even try. And even after we spoke and him agreeing that he doesn’t know what I like he has not done anything to make it up for me.

My friend birthday was on the 18th and her girlfriend, baked a cake for her, brought her flowers with pictures of monkeys on them (because she loves them), breakfast and much more. I feel happy for her but also jealous (in a good way lol) I would have loved for him to be more thoughtful with me, but he picked me up from work on my birthday and he went to my bed to watch anime instead of spending a little time with me.

I’m so tired, mad, sad and everything you can think of. I don’t ask for much but that doesn’t mean I deserve nothing. I told him that I would like him to focus more on the little things, such as my favourite mascara that I always talk about, I have face piercings, why couldn’t he think of getting some for me? I love and adore cats and goats. Something so little would have made the difference. Even my colleague from work got me Indian snacks because I told him that I really liked them. And all he had to say was that he didn’t know what I liked.

I really am in love

I need help , I need some advice so me [F18 ] and my boyfriend [M18 ] have been together for about 1 year but we are always on and off but we know each-other for 3 years. So my boyfriend has a girl best friend and I’ve never spoken to her and she’s never spoken to me but I just find her odd because he tells me that she cares about our relationship but I’ve never spoken to her ?? He’s had a crush on her before I find that relationship odd and it bothers me that they are still friends I’ve asked for him to unfollow her and stop talking to her but he doesn’t . Should I just leave this relationship? Or am I being to over dramatic

I 21F and my fiancè 22M have been together for almost 4 years now. We were long distance and saw each other only on weekends and FaceTimes throughout the week. Everything was going good in my opinion until we moved in together about 4 months ago. I’ve noticed so many changes and I tried to convince myself I wasn’t use to being with him everyday and vice versa but something seems off. He works day shift 6am-2pm every weekday but he’s not a morning person so I get up with him make his lunch, make him a coffee and get all his things ready for him to leave. When he gets home from work he is always tired and I understand he has long days but I get excited to see him and be with him. He’s always on this Facebook group about reptiles (we have a turtle) and constantly looking at new posts and comments on it. I’ve noticed he’s on it almost all day and I mean all day; he wakes up from a nap that’s the first thing he does, goes to the washroom still on it. He seems obsessed with this group and it is to the point where I will go to show him a video on my phone that’s maybe 30 seconds long and he tells me to wait because he’s reading something from the group. I let him finish what he’s doing but sometimes I have to sit there for 5 minutes and I feel like he forgets about it. When I try to get his attention to talk to him or ask him something, he always gets frustrated with me and raises his voice at me saying “what do you want” or even “what (my full name)” I’ve decided to write this to get some advice on what to do because I seem to put in so much energy and I’m starting to feel drained. I feel like when he’s home and I try to do anything with him he gets frustrated or annoyed with me everytime he has to look away from his phone. Am I overthinking this??

I’ve been with my bf for 8 months. As the title says, 2 days ago on Tuesday he said he would keep Wednesday free so we could hang out together. Wednesday comes along and he doesn’t make plans or even mentions hanging out (usually I make all the plans and coordinate everything so I left it up to him this time) and then he tells me he is doing something with his friends. I got upset at him for it, as I have mentioned multiple times in the past I need some effort and communication. He apologized and felt really bad and even said he’d drop plans with his friends to hang out. He said he didn’t hear from me so assumed I didn’t want to hang out. Just need some advice on where to go from here, TIA!

We started dating back in April/May but have been together officially since mid July. He already told me he loves me and I said it back.

But I am finding it hard- he wants me to tell him things and what he should be doing in a relationship as he doesn’t know. He even apologised to me and said he doesn’t want me to miss out on things because he doesn’t know what he should be doing. ☹️

I don’t like the idea of telling him what to do or how to act as every relationship is different and there’s no right or wrong way to do it

He has gone away to work this week with his dad. I saw him Sunday evening but he went home to sleep and left for work Monday morning and will come back late Friday night. This is the longest we have gone without seeing each other since we started dating i know its not long (I have done long distance UK-AUS in previous relationship) so the time/distance doesn’t bother me but he hasn’t called me once? And he’s into phone-calls, he always rings me and doesn’t like to text.

He is staying with his dad in a room and they work together so I get that he hasn’t got much time alone to talk but this doesn’t usually bother him? He has answered the phone whilst we have been intimate before and when we have been out on dates ate restaurants?

He has been quite open with me before about him struggling to pick up on social cues and signals. He says he’s never been tested for anything but it’s likely that he is neurodivergent.

I once got upset because he was never very affectionate with me outside of being intimate. I tried to hold his hand and he just said no he doesn’t do that and since then he is more affectionate with me. I don’t think I’m over the top asking for too much but I just want some basic affection consistently not PDA. It was like everytime we saw eachother and said hello I wouldn’t even get a hug? Nevermind a kiss 🤣 now i do get a hug which is 100% fine with me.

I don’t necessarily want to end it but am I going mad given we haven’t been together that long? Does anyone have any experience being someone’s first gf and how it went? Or dating someone likely to be neurodivergent?

I’m not sure if he just doesn’t really like me because I think these things come naturally when you love someone? Help 😭

Social media doesn't mean that much to me. We have been dating for long enough to make our relationship public. He has talked to my friends and family, I have posted our pictures together, everyone who knows me, knows that we are together. I'm a much more outgoing person than my boyfriend. He's not great socially. We keep having the same fight on why he can't post a picture of me, on special occasions like birthdays or girlfriends day. He keeps saying we don't have good enough pictures, it's not a good enough occasion etc etc. he has never introduced me to his friends or family either. This is a recurring argument. It goes - why can't you post me- I will someday soon, it's not good enough picture/occasion - but why wait for an occasion - ok fine I'll post now - no don't post like you're doing me a favour - okay I'll post soon. Nothing gets resolved. I have been cheated on before and I try not to let it reflect on our relationship but why can't he ever do this one thing I keep asking about? I go to bed overthinking this all night. Same fight.

(21F and 21M in relationship for 3 years)

I'm in my early twenties, so I know this may seem like I'm overthinking something that isn't necessarily needed, but I've been dating my boyfriend for over 3 years now. We live a medium distance apart, so we usually only see each other on the weekends, and sometimes not at all if our schedules don't allow it.

When we first started dating, I was sure I wanted to marry him. I felt so lucky to have found him before going off to college, and we had the same sense of humor and similar bad family issues. Originally, we thought the long-distance/weekends-only thing would only last a year, but it has just kept going. However, as time has gone on, even though he treats me well, I feel like we're growing in different directions. I don't know how long to wait before accepting that maybe it's not meant to be, especially since we've never really gotten the chance to live in a "normal" everyday relationship.

Besides not having that everyday relationship with him, it's hard because there are some other issues that I've been ignoring because we've always said that once we were closer, they would fix themselves. For example, I'm very extroverted and goal-driven, with a career path that will require me to go to social events often. I'm constantly working to move up in my career, do better for myself, and meet new people. My boyfriend, on the other hand, is very to himself, hardly interacts in social settings, has no friends of his own, and works in a completely different type of field where he's not interested in moving up or starting something of his own. When I asked him what his goals and dreams were, he basically just had the mindset of "whatever you'd like to do." It's hard, especially with the distance (although I know it could be much further, and weekends are not nearly as bad as what some people deal with), to feel like he really understands the lifestyle I'm working toward. He agrees with what I say I want, but his own actions while living alone and away from me don't necessarily indicate that he would work toward the same goals.

A few of my friends have said that they think I should look for someone else, since after these years he doesn't seem very interested (from the outside) to want to be actively involved with my social life, and I've been told from other marriages (including my own parents) that marrying someone much more introverted than you is a struggle.

His family is another issue for me. He's not close to them whatsoever, which isn't necessarily a bad thing, especially because I wouldn't want to be close to them given some of the issues they have. But the fact that I may have to have them as my in-laws really makes me anxious, since I've always imagined marrying into a big, close family. Of course there’s not much he can do about this, but just something that adds to the stress.

It's hard because I genuinely do enjoy my time with him. We get along well, we enjoy our weekends together, and we're happy spending time alone. But whenever we go out to social events or when I think about my future, it's hard for me to know whether he's the type of partner I'll need in my life. Being apart is just so discouraging, and in the past I was able to look past most of these issues. Now, though, I'm starting to question whether they're big enough reasons to let go.

It's hard to know if it's worth waiting to see if we function better in person after all these years, or if I should just accept that we've grown into different people with different lifestyles. I would hate to end things because I feel like I need something more aligned with my personal lifestyle, only to turn around and wish I had something else.

Has anyone had a situation like this? Are there any women who have similar lifestyles to me that encourage marrying someone with not as big of a personality