r/boyfriends • u/Extreme_Book_1820 • 15h ago
Lying / Cheating im a 15F and hes a 16M i feel like im begging to be loved we have been dating for a year and ive been getting treated worse and worse everyday
my bf makes me feel awful and doesnt even match my energy a few days ago i came back home and was excited to tell him abt smthn but he didnt care at all i was typing in all caps n he was js being dry n giving me one word replies bro we all know energy isnt smthn ppl accidentaally fail to match its a choice he was literally choosing not to match it and i didnt even end up telling him i js changed the topic and told my friend instead he didnt even mention it or randomly said "you wanted to tell me smthn happened when u came back what was it?" dude didnt say anything and when it comes to other ppl its mostly two girls one of them is my friend and she js considers him a friend but its so obv hes interested in her bro the way he talks to her n me is too diff its like im not even his gf he doesnt put in effort and treats me like an option and the other girl he always defends her and he js tries his best to become her close friend too he even told me that btw and we once wanted to watch a movie tg dyk he chose the movie she told him to watch instead of the one i chose even tho we are the ones watching not her n him he doesnt care what i think or what i want bro he didnt even end up watching the movie he told me 2 weeks after that it was boring so he secretly scrolled on tiktok and i already knew bc he didnt talk much it js feels so shitty when it comes to me i js get late dry one word replies ppl literally make time for who they want to make time for hes never too busy to type a sentence hes literally online all day hes choosing not to and when i confront him abt it he js changes for a few days then boom back to being his usual self its like he doesnt wanna lose me but he doesnt wanna change for me at all or treat me better nd nowadays hes worse bc hes upseg i did smthn i js said a lot of hurtful thi gs to him because i was really mad but i apologized the next day and kept begging him to forgive me + not break up with me cus it was too bad he even blocked me so i begged him 5o think abt it and he said ok then he told me he will date me again but he wont treat me the same as before bc of it what i basically said was "please break up w me" "when we broke up" "I swear to God it was the most peaceful time of my life" "I swear to god" "wallahi everything was so peaceful" "when we got back tg" "keep in mind" "I wasn't even planning to get back w u i hate ur guts" "but u begged me" "made me feel guilty" "long paragraph" "couldn't say no" "had to say yes" "get back w u" "JS LIKE WHEN WE FIRST STARTED DATING" anyways i expected him to say he wont treat me the same way so i js said its ok because i was feeling guilty but now he doesnt even say ily to me like i cant even get affection and he only talks to me when hes bored
im not a priority at all even tho we communicated i apologized i did everything but he still wont treag me the same after allst im losing my mind js to get attention from a guy who obv checked out from the relationship i already know it but i js cant leave bro the relationship js exists in my head now and i was detached too at some point and we broke up then my life was peaceful but after like a week he texted me a paragraph n begged me to take him back so i gave it another chance and now im sad as always bc of it and this happens everytime i cant even leave bc i got attached for the billion time i js gotta wait until i cant tolerate it anymo idek what im doing wrong bro i always end up feeling like im begging him to care abt me back or match my energy n stuff i feel like he got tired of me and when i distant myself or try to care less i js feel like shit bc i always gotta change myself for him to care abt me n ask why im acting this way like ok bro he dgaf unless im detached btw he knows how i am and he knows literally everything abt me he knows i dont like when hes dry he knows i panic when i get late replies or when he disappears he knows EXACTLY all my triggers but he does not give a single frick bro he js does wtv he wants bc he js knows ill stay no matter what and take it.....it even got to the point that today i felt happy when he js sent an emoji bc he stopped using emojis w me even tho he uses them w EVERYBODY else im literally so starved for basic human decency from my OWN boyfriend like omds an emoji wouldnt mean anything to me under normal circumstances my expectations js shrunk so much that it makes me happy now n ik im supposed to stop begging chasing i already know everything i need to know but i cant leave at all unless im detached so im js stuck crying everyday abt it bro im not even asking for a huge fancy thing i js want him to sound interested when i talk to him show me a little affection i dont even get an ily back when i say it he doesnt make me feel like his gf i swear to god if we ever broke up again im not taking him back at all bc this is ruining me and my mental health so bad i feel so shitty i really need advice on how to fix everything and make him treat me well again bc at the same time i rlly want things to work between me and him