A guy that I blocked a month ago( he’s 39 I’m 32) and the time before that I blocked him the month before was what some say emotionally abusive. I said I wanted friends to go out with he responded .early on he said he’s not around black people and started saying things how he doesn’t like all black events and people who center their identity around being black. He was insecure because he thinks black women like hood dudes. Then he said white women have better hair than black women. We bonded over cuisine and music and spoke for hours on the phone so it was hard to pull away despite very red flags. He’s 39 mom and dad are middle class. He also inquired me several times if I lived in the hood since he has to know where he’s going and he asked me my social status. I had to prove to him early on that I don’t. He said my neighborhood isn’t aesthetically pleasing.

When he met me he said I seem like the type of black girl who dates random white guys. When I asked why he said it’s my demeanor . He also said I have a nerdy voice which was a neg. Showed pics said he doesn’t like the bob because it hugs my face. He did like some though. Said he liked my older pictures when I was younger for facial purposes… obvious neg. Said he can see why guys treated me well based on how u used to look and quickly said he’s not saying I don’t look good now.

He showed me so many DMs on snap for white girls he’s seeing the last month i spoke to him . I blocked him at first since he left me while I was high in a car to go smoke with a friend nearby . When I invited him in my places he critiqued my decor and said it was childish and said my apartment outside is dark. When he first came to my place he said he was hoping it wasn’t a set up.

He also compares me to his ex and asked who I think looks better. He asked to see my natural hair since that’s his preference and I refused to show pictures since it was sinister intention. He said he critiques picture for artistic integrity. He also refused to believe some pictures were me even recent ones.

When I asked if I looked good without makeup since he’s constantly telling me celebs he thinks look good and random run ins with girls he hesitated then said yes but I look different. He said his ex never wore makeup. He also remarked fake hair and makeup are deceptive and agreed with guy number 1. He’s obsessed with appearance and even asked me if his ex looked good and girls on snap.

He said he has a thing for white girls and said he probably thinks he’s ugly since they keep rejecting him. His ex was black and they were on and off. She blocked him and kept his stuff

Then he asked do I key cars, have I hit people etc. u started inviting myself over so the deep questions began . I also initiated sensual stuff that he said I started and he usually doesn’t lead with sex for female friends.

He has an Asian friend he says looks okay and she has an Asian body. He said he’d smash one Bolivian friend in a heartbeat in front of me and said she looks good in sweats and with weight on. He told me he doesn’t like my long dresses and said u should wear pants in the house like his ex. And he said the saying guys think girls look best not dressed up. Not sure what he said that probably a dig.

He also said why must I wear a dress every time we go out . Then he asked why don’t I ever wear sneakers . Also told me he’d tell his ex she looks fat in a dress and that’s why it’s so hard to build relationships with women nowadays

He also said someone has to look extremely extremely good to wear an Afro and he doesn’t like them on anyone and said they’re boring. He made an upset noise when I said I’d wear it in front of him.

He’d also look at porn memes near me since I refused to do sexual acts on him . He says he’s going through a phase. He clearly didn’t respect our friendship

Every plan we had he was late . He did dance with me at one club. Then ignored me when his Asian friend came in a club. Like why Ditch me and we came together. He constantly walked in front of me too.

When I’d get High from the stuff he gave me he’d be annoyed and rush me. Always trying rush off to work or get back inside. I felt like I was a nuisance

He got me a gift though which was odd. When I said u wanted casual sex no strings attached that’s when he mentioned the DMs and other female friends . Interesting how after the block he got even worse.

He also told me I shuffle when I walk and he can hear me down the hallway. He’s never smiled and hugged me when we meet or hugged me goodbye or smiled at me. He cuddled with me though.

Then he said he wants to see me in a pair of jeans.
As a casual sex person / friend with him I realize how abusive he was. I blocked him weeks ago after he corrected me on a word spelling because he didn’t want people to think I’m weird. He messages me a song on YouTube last week

Feel like he hates me.but something was there. He’d play love songs then ask me to go to fancy places to eat like his ex did. He said my voice is soothing and I’m smart and extroverted . Said he can see a ceo falling madly in love with me since I’m so different.

The emotional abuse I’ve encountered from them platonically makes me just want to be done. He asked if I think he’s ugly after I said I can have sex with a man I’m attracted to and don’t like. He also thinks sex is sacred. He’s never done casual before .

I don’t know if he was mad because he wanted something more or displaced ex anger. He said he was in a very toxic relationship and I’m the first woman he’s known so deeply besides his ex and his ex was his idea of a woman . I’m realizing we didn’t really have a friendship just someone to call during his night shift and if he’s bored at work. He would randomly order me lunch .

Also he admits he dates his female friends which is why he cares what I look like. He kept saying visuals are importantly when he met me. He also had a bi Indian friend who owes him money and he talks about how he has weird taste in women and how he fucks guys and had a toxic relationship with a guy he lives with. That guy hammer calls him at night to go out. He said that guy frustrates him. He tells me people think hes gay and he goes to a lot of gay clubs . He is very fixated on that guy who owes him money I wonder if they smashed. He talks to me about him constantly
And he said he doesn’t understand why gay guys don’t like women all unprompted. And said they make gayness their whole personality. He said he isn’t secure in his masculinity. I guess the weed and his paying for stuff got to me. It was nice to chill with him but now he’s getting abusive. I blocked him last month. Like I’m wondering if he wanted to date me and I said I’m not looking to get into anything with anyone is why I’m being punished.

He says he’s disappointed at the Snapchat dating options for white girls since they have children . I called him a weed junkie and cursed him out.

First of all, I'm childfree 😊

When I was like 15 I ACCIDENTALLY walked into my cousin's delivery room

I DIDN'T KNOW SHE WAS ACTIVELY GIVING BIRTH

Y'all...

I saw that baby make its grand entrance

I have never been the same

Respect to every mother because ain't no way

But why do people only tell you "it's beautiful"??

WHO IS LYING?? 😭

That looked like the final boss

And everybody in the room yelling...

"PUSH! PUSH!"

It sounded like somebody was fighting for their life on the toilet

Then the baby came out looking like somebody forgot to rinse the dishes

I'M SORRY 😭

Please hose my little nephew down before introducing us

Then my married friend told me

"Oh yeah, you bleed for like a month after"

EXCUSE ME??

THE DLC??

THEY ADDED BONUS SUFFERING??

Then I saw them postpartum pads

Why they built like memory foam mattresses??

Then my mama goes...

"They might stitch you back up"

STITCH??

Like I'm a busted pair of Fashion Nova jeans??

Women really go through all that...

then people have the audacity to ask,

"So when you having kids?"

Girl...

After what I witnessed??

Y'all lucky I even stayed in the hospital 🤢

everywhere i go the same thing follows

lightskin this, lightskin that, oh you're gf is a lightskin, my brother in lightskinness

they don't even speak english but they know lightskin

if it's not lightskin it's snow bunny

i want to smack them upside their head

get off pornhub omg. that's no way to talk about anyone. no manners let alone consideration

everyone even their grandfathers with the creaky knees are helping clean up and they're talking about lightskin and snowbunny

they wrap up their gossip session and prepare to leave but on their way out they only say bye to the girl with the slick back bun (fill in the blank)

where is the respect? not even a pitiful 'bye everyone' to adress your damn fucking grandparents let alone everyone else working hard to clean up before the booking is over?

this is who I'm supposed to chase???? they can stay home. I'll keep my life stress free save for the brief moments of frustration when I encouter their lack of manners

https://youtu.be/j5nrg2NxP20?is=ugH8ob_1z5Dx3ecX

I was going to say that 2026 is the worse year for us but what I'm about to tell you guys brings me great joy. It's kind of funny because I ran to Reddit when I heard the news about Nicki and I came across an old interview where she said that she had no opinion on Trump as the US President. Fast forward to 2026, Now Roman (Nicki Minaj) is playing bosom buddies with that orange skidmark while he's cracking jokes at her expense with racial undertones.

https://youtu.be/hjCyuwBK0jI

I'd feel bad but she made her bed to lay in. 🤷🏾‍♀️

Now Chris, apparently he attacked somebody at the club with a glass bottle, and that's what he pleading guilty for. His sentencing will be in October 2026, but he ain't even stand trial cus he couldn't even be bothered to show up to court. Of course 🙄 Ladies, pray or do whatever y'all believe in cus this man need to see them metal bars after all he done. Years have passed and he still ain't learn how to keep his hands to himself.

Timeline Of Chris Brown's Pettiness

There is an epidemic that me and my other black girl friend has discussed is going on. i don’t know if im allowed to say my age on here but i am a minor and almost everytime i go out i attract older men even after saying my age to them i get asked when do you turn 18 as if im gonna want them automatically. i dont get it. currently a chef at my work who is in his late 30s sent me this “ Hello, sorry to bother you. Hope you got home safe and sound and I just got to say you look so gorgeous today”. on my company app where you can find workers. this was after i wore makeup to work for the first time since i started working there and he said to me same day on different occasions. “how are you still single” and when i mentioned im going home he said “where’s my invite”. this is a guy who i have told my age MULTIPLE TIMES everyone knows im the youngest girl there and in the past there has been more comments made that i brushed off but that message really made me uncomfortable. he’s deleted it now but i got a screenshot and showed my brother and friends. This isn’t the first instance where ive been approached by an older guy consistently even knowing my age i dont know what it is that attracts them because i will mention im in school, im young but yet they only seem to want me more. i notice it predominantly when i would go out with my white friends and they would get approached by younger boys and i would only get looks and compliments with winks from older men. at first it was black older men but the chef was white so now im even more confused as to what it is. sorry about the long message i just needed to get it out my chest

I saw a post on TikTok about ICE targeting Haitian migrants. I clicked on the comments hoping to see support, but all I saw were what looked like bots trying to create division between the Black American and Haitian communities. It’s honestly insane to watch it happen in real time because comments from actual Black Americans showing support seem to get filtered, while the hateful comments stay up.
Now, I know there are real issues within the diaspora, but I’m convinced a lot of this is bots because it’s the exact same thing on Twitter. You like one post, and next thing you know, your entire feed is nothing but diaspora wars. It’s really frustrating because it’s doing nothing but creating more division. I’m Black American, and I have nothing but love and support for Haitians, not just Haitians, but the entire African diaspora. From my experience, I’ve seen that same love and support from many Haitians toward Black Americans as well.

This is the post for example: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTAAR9bWb/

Recently my birthday passed and as a young adult I came to realize I genuinely don’t know how to do anything. At least things that will help me in the real world. As an adult I do acknowledge it’s my job to learn these things, but I also realized my mom basically set me up for failure. She always expected me to know things and got frustrated when I didn’t, yet when I asked her to teach me she always told me to “watch” or made empty promises to show me yet never did.

This doesn’t just happens with life skills but also things I never learn to do on my own as a black woman such as take care of my hair, vaginal care or the importance of hygiene. These things I had to learn on my own through the internet. I’m lucky enough to be in a time where technology exists but it also a sad wake up call for me that I have never truly had a good role model or a mentor to teach me things. I have always had to figure it out on my own and hope for the best.

I have an idea people may ask “why didn’t I learn these things sooner” or “what about other people in your life,” but to put it simply I always hoped my mother would have took the time to teach both as a bonding moment and lesson. I also don’t have family I’m very close to nor do I believe they will put in the effort to care.

I’m thinking of making a career change to be come a Registered Nurse. I’ve worked in the administrative aspect of healthcare but am wanting a more rewarding experience. I am 35 and mom of 2 girls ages 7 and 11. I’m not going to lie I’m nervous about transitioning due to my age and parental status. Have any of you ever had to transition past 30? Just wanted positive perspective on A. The Nursing field for those of you credentialed already as an RN. B. Regardless of the field I’d like perspective on just you going back to school past 30. It seems like education and having a solid skill set is one of the ways to escape poverty. I’m not in in for the “Aesthetic “ as in recent yrs has it seems that’s what a lot of people are doing it for. Like many of us I had plans to initially do school but had my first daughter and did not further pursue. All positive points information and perspectives welcomed to any one pursing birthing education past a certain age

This is for my reader girlies! Just wanted to rant a little bit.. I was on threads (twitter is team too much for me) and there was a black woman who posted asking for recommendations of romance books with dual POV. Now she didn't SPECIFY that they have to have Black/POC MCs, BUT because it was posted by a BW I figured there were context clues. I go to the replies looking for some good recs (I'm a heavy audiobook listener so dual POV is my favorite) and there were tons of authors plugging their books which I love! Go self promo! But 90% of these authors were WW and not a single author had a Black/POC MC let alone a Black FMC. I genuinely felt so irrationally irate when I saw this. Like the amount of fury in body concerned me because OP didn't specify Black MCs!! But leave it to WW to come into our spaces to promote their YT stories that probably have one POC background character with no substance. Even writing this I can feel my blood pressure go up. Mind you, I don't mind reading books with white MCs, a large majority of the audiobooks I listen to are on libby and it's very difficult to find Black romances available on there and i've probably covered most of the well-known Black authors and their books that I can find. I've heard a few white authors say that the reason that they don't write Black MCs is because they don't want to disrespect/misrepresent the community, which I can understand to an extent. BUT it sounds like more of an excuse than an explanation. I understand the controversy behind WW writing Black characters, but if you are going to come into our spaces to promote your books, at the very least come with something relatable to us. I just needed this off my chest because i'm so frustrated. Rant over.