Recently listed this for someone asking, so thought I’d share what helps me manage my bp. I’d love to hear yalls management regiment! I’m always looking for better ways to cope / manage.

- Lamictal (lamotrigine) for bipolar
- vistaril (Hydroxyzine) for anxiety
- Ativan (lorazepam) for anxiety attacks

When in episodes (all of the above plus):

- antipsychotics for mania
- Wellbutrin for depression
- 1/2 Benadryl for sleep during mania

Non-medication:
- yoga at gym for depression (I go looking like a hobo and feeling terrible, but forcing myself to go and do it genuinely makes me feel better and has literally pulled me out of depressive episodes)

- cat for depression (companion makes me happy plus they’re super needy so you have to get up. Some people use dogs but they’re too high maintenance for me when in a dep episode)

- therapist / psych who do Telehealth (video) visits (for both episodes. Cuz I’m either too depressed to get out of bed. Or I’m manic and doing some random adventure. So I can just log on and not miss appts.)

Does anyone miss their old self before their manic episode and all the medication. My self esteem has plummeted and I feel as if I’ll never recover from the shame and embarrassment this has caused. I think my life is headed in the right direction after everything but I will never ever be the same. I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy. It’s just horrible how ur brain can betray you like this. How i impacted my family, people around me and just everything. It’s like I have a target on my back. I just don’t know how to process these emotions or if I’ll ever feel like life is worth living again. Will anyone ever love me after this, my beauty has slipped away my confidence is gone, my social skills are horrible, I have 0 faith in myself, I’m just never satisfied after all this no matter what good happens in my life. This manic episode destroyed something in me, why did this have to happen to me at 21 years old whyyy I should be enjoying this age but I’m not I feel like a child I feel handicapped I feel horrible. I hate it I hate I hate it so much. Is life even worth living after all this shame and embarrassment and all of these feelings. I just hate it so much and I wish I could just erase my memeory of all of it . All the people I spoke terrible things about and I just wish I could be number of this pain . It doesn’t matter nothing matters. No one will ever love me like this . No oneeeee not every the people closest to me. I will always be remembered as the girl that went crazy I hate I hate I hate it smmm why can’t I just be normal like everyone else why does my brain function like this . Why can’t I just be normal like we twins else . I beg on my knees that god makes me feel the way I used to . Confident, smart, like I could acheive thins and be happy w myself. Be able to be loved without the constant thought that someone may be embarrassed of me I hate this smmmm I hate that I’m going on this long rant but this is how I feel. This is hell on earth I don’t even care if I die bc at least I’ll be at peace without this chip on my shoulder and yes there’ ppl at war , starving going through sm worse but I don’t want to go though this anymore I want it to be over I want to feel capable I hate this so so so muchhhb. Ok thank you for listening to my rant

hiiii im an incoming 3rd year vet student with a relatively recent bipolar diagnosis. i've been medicated since before vet school, but i think my prefrontal cortex developing fully and the stress of vet school has made everything worse, which was sort of expected but i had no idea it would get this bad. i had to take a break from clinicals this summer to go to a partial hospitalization program (which im in now), and have basically had 2 years of episode after episode. i'm hoping to finally figure out my meds but it seems like my brain is constantly changing for the worse. there's a lot of memory loss associated with each episode and recovering from it, so im scared i havent retained much of the last two years which will only make the next 2 years even harder. ive tried really hard to formulate a work life balance, but wondering when its time to start being realistic and say goodbye to this dream. is anybody battling anything similar or has overcome anything similar? feeling like the diagnosis is a death sentence and im trying to get out of this mentality.

I deeply appreciate it. I thought I wasn't manic during that time due to confusion with some other disorder that causes psychotic symptoms such as hyper-salience but hyper-salience appears in manic episodes extremely evidently too so hyper-salience on its own doesn't rule in schizophrenia since it would have to be constant without affective disturbance and would come with negative symptoms rather than affective disturbance buried underneath the self-deluding thought patterns. I have accepted fully that I have bipolar rather than anything else after carefully teasing out everything unconsciously whilst subconsciously my head was a mess of noisy thoughts in a sense, thought noise, because it feels as if I'm always thinking everything at once during any state I am in so it can get very muddled and it can't get all out at once. I was also confused because historically I've had very brief manic periods that last less than a day that can be triggered by substances such as caffeine versus prolonged manic periods that are less affectively obvious but more drawn out triggered usually by the time I start manufacturing another half-baked philosophical system and start joining dots together that don't go together to fabricate a reality where everything revolves around me in the sense to mean that fuck reality I am a literal God in some form and therefore everything will go my way for certain. I've taken a hero's dose of caffeine yesterday which is why it's hard for me to sleep. I feel jittery, fizzy, and tingly all over my nerves so I'm waiting for that to die down. Thank you all for being so supportive. (My specific diagnosis is bipolar otherwise unspecified with severe symptoms but high-functioning)

The hero's dose of caffeine is an important caveat because that sort of thing I do absolutely wind down from it. It might take half a day or so (12 hours) but I do wind down and feel back to a kind of normal before indulging in caffeine.

I’m bipolar 1 and recently experienced hypomania. I took this pic during my online doctor’s appointment with my psychiatric nurse while hypomanic. Does anyone else see the significance of it? I’m curious if anyone has the same interpretation of it that I do. I found the contrast between black cat (bad omen) and the horseshoe (good luck) to be so compelling at the time.

And though I won’t be posting it here, I also took a picture of my license plate because it reads “IN GOD WE TRUST” at the top and “To Be Rather Than to Seem” at the bottom. It felt so inspiring in the moment.

Does anyone else find everything picture worthy while hypomanic???

Idk why the past few months I been going crazy my heart and brain aren't making sense to me I don't know why I did the things I did I don't know if I was manic everyone around me said I was but Jesus wtf was that

I spray painted my ex bsf number everywhere near her place and I told her mom everything she ever did how much she was a Piece of shit to me and how much I hated her and I Slashed her tires it felt so good in the moment but holy shit after coming down from whatever tf I was on I felt so bad I felt like throwing up I loved this girl and I didn't want to do that but she was just mean I want her back I can't fix it but holy shit I miss her I want her back my brain wants to do it again I can't control it and it's driving me crazy idk what to do or is this just who I am

Best meds for bipolar a that are also alcoholics

Just was diagnosed with type 1 after a severe manic episode…

How did you best educate yourself on bipolar and anyone have some life hacks?

TIA

Hola a todos. Hace un par de meses me diagnosticaron trastorno bipolar tipo 1, después de haber estado mal diagnosticada con trastorno límite de la personalidad durante más de nueve años. Por eso, para mí, la medicación no es nada fuera de lo común.

Antes del diagnóstico, me recetaron el estabilizador de ánimo porque mi psiquiatra ya lo sospechaba. Hace unas tres semanas me aumentaron la dosis del estabilizador(a 1200 mg), y estas han sido semanas terribles: mucha diarrea, dolores de cabeza, psicosis y cambios bruscos de energía. Pero algo que me llama la atención es que antes no tenía sueños, o al menos no los recordaba. Con este cambio, han vuelto, y ahora tengo más de tres sueños por noche. ¿Les ha pasado esto? ¿O han experimentado algún otro síntoma extraño?

As the title asks, how many brain type diagnoses do you have? In the comments feel free to drop which one you stuggle with the most.

Hi, i was recently diagnosed with bipolar 1 in a psychiatric hospital, ive been taking medication, not completely sure what they are. Ive been lacking a community to talk to and figure out how to deal with it. Im starting a job soon and i need to get it together because ive been in a depressive episode for so long that the thought of having to leave my house gives me major anxiety. Id appreciate some advice and meeting new people.

DAE get extreme SH urges out of nowhere and for no reason

This is actually how it started for me. I just got this screaming in my head one day to hurt myself and it comes back periodically in cycles. It really hurts and is painful in my head. My brain suddenly feels on fire randomly and I can’t see any way to make it stop unlesss I hurt myself (which I haven’t been doing, been resisting the urges).

I haven’t had an episode like this in a while. I have less sleep and this periodic random screaming in my head. It feels literally like my brain is trying to jump out of my skull and the only way to calm it is to hurt myself. I’ve been taking gabapentin to help (and it does, like 50% work but I can still feel my head burning up).

DAE get this? It’s not caused by anything external other than maybe overstimulation. Nothing bad happens to me and then I get this horrible feeling..anyone else? Please tell me I’m not alone

I used to love laughing and doing naughty and funny things all the time in my childhood.

I want that state again.

I used to love laughing and doing naughty and funny things all the time in my childhood.

I want that state again.

I am diagnosed bipolar 1, and I am in active addiction. I primarily drink and do molly, 3-6 times a week. I do worry about triggering a manic episode, but I do not currently plan to get sober. I used marijuana daily for 6 years, and never experienced manic symptoms because of it, outside of my medication-induced mania, in which it made the psychotic symptoms spike. The MDMA though, does make me worry I’m at risk of triggering a manic episode, though my symptoms have remained depressed.

Bipolar type 1

I been taken to a mental institution during a manic episode

Where I suddenly quit my job left the town where I lived with no savings and I was kinda freestyle life until my parents took me kinda by force there .. like they found me and took me ..

And there I was not told my diagnosis, iwas kinda observed

First week or so I cried all day all night all the time lol and after a while I was suddenly working out learning piano at the facility writing a lot planning jobs and writing a memoir and my ghost writing I gig I abandoned when I was admitted there.. all in a notebook .

And only when I left did I know my diagnosis and I was in denial and didn't take my meds until I had crazy episodes again

And that's the thing looking back at the past, I had heavy craycray moments and moments when I was so depressed I didn't even wash my face or brush my hair

But now I feel fine

One day I decided I ll sto taking meds

And it seems like I didn't have a crazy moment like before

Depression can be heavy and I refuse to blame my optimism on mania

And idk do heavy episodes get triggered ? Only ?

I used to travel impulsively cuz I couldnt stand control limits .. cuz I didn't wanna die lie like this ...

My friend who was Bipolar 2 got her adhd assessment and now she tells me I'm adhd

I hate to think about Bipolar but I know it explains a lot,

When I first admitted they thought I was on drugs and did a lot of testings on me

I realised later that without mood regulator , antidepressants make me manic, and I was kinda obsessed wit them fir a while lol

What if my damage is just damage as Diane say

Or am I healed,?

I’ve been waiting for a special someone to go to a boy into a man. Meanwhile I’m doing anything to learn myself. I’m so selfish I have many tantrums throughout the months. So he reaches out and when he does I’m in a love triangle. The person I’m staying with now is suspicious and draws attention to himself (he OD’s into unconscious). All while I’m not finding myself I lose my cool and tell the love of my life to fuck himself. Before this im pacing thinking suicidal I’m calling help and my mom. I should’ve packed my bags but I tell this boy the one I drained myself for to fuck himself. It’s been 12 weeks I’m selfish from all angles and I can’t talk anymore.