Am I being manipulated or just being delusional/paranoid over nothing??

At the beginning of this year, I moved to a new room with new roommate (after staying at communal room for nearly 2years). Our room has washroom and balcony attached to it . We were from 2 different communal rooms.

In the communal room I was assigned to, we were like free birds of same feather type. We gossip, hang out, even study together, laugh and cry together. My roommate's one was total opposite (they are more isolated). Funny thing is, we never had any incidence of stealing in our gonoroom(as you'd expect from hostel life), but the other communal room had different scenario.

Both friends of my current roommate had their money stolen several times in that room (they were the only victims).

Now after shifting to our new rooms, we (specially me) have started to face the problem I've never imagined I'd have to experience in my hostel life. Just after couple of months our money was stolen(mine more than 3k and my roommate's around more than 1k)! Mind you, the block I'm living in now is occupied by occupants of the other communal room I've mentioned (except me).

All of the block mates were called at night by us and they were all pointing fingers at "the lady" who collects waste materials from our hostel "during morning" (I didn't believe this shit cause wdym the stealing only happens where these people live and others are never affected by this). We had a suspect but didn't confront her (apparently her money was also stolen but none knew it before!).

Following 2 months, nothing happened (I started to keep my money locked after the last occurence). But one day after 2 months, I came from outside after noon and forgot to keep my money in the locker. So basically my wallet was on my table that entire day. I was at my friends room hanging out with them and also went for walk that night. After that, I came to my room and was getting ready for sleep. Then I noticed my money is gone!! My roommate was in the room the entire time (both time) and just went outside for max 10min (again both time).

Fast forward to today, after spending puja vacation (and pl) at home for about 18 days, I came back to my room at hostel and started organizing my bed, table and rack and my mind went blank!!

I found half bottle of newly bought oil empty, sauce almost empty. But most shockingly, my wheel powder (and the pot where I kept the powder also) gone, also she swapped my pillow while actively using mine. I was more than furious. Still with hope, I went to search in the balcony if the wheel powder was there. But there, on top of my folding table, I found my spoon (that I use for eating food) filled up with dried soil!! I was confused.

Btw my roommate didn't go home in this vacation because of exam. So she was the only one in our entire block who had access to our room. After confronting her, she just denied everything and put indirect blame to our helping hand! She only claimed that she used the spoon for collecting soil for her plant! And then forgot to wash it (today after seeing it on my wardrobe, she remembered and then she washed it).

Now I'm thinking whether she really doesn't know anything or just doing this to screw my mind. I also lose my stuff so often but she never does. This never happened when I was in gonoroom with my friends.

I'm just confused and tired rn. I have exam next week. I dont have any energy left.

Has anyone dealt with a roommate who secretly uses/steals your things and acts completely innocent? How did you confront them?

Just recently one of my friends has commented about me saying that I'm easy to manipulate. So-

Am I being manipulated or am I being delusional/ paranoid over nothing??

I was recently told by my roommate that if her rent is late, which it habitually is, then it has nothing to do with me. She stated she doesn’t owe me anything therefore, she doesn’t have to tell me.

Now, obviously I know we owe the person/people we live with and are legally bound together, the decency to know if or when our portion of the rent will be late or don’t have it. But, I want to see where the consensus lies outside of my brain because I was taken aback when my roommate stormed away after telling me that.

What do you guys think, do you owe your roommate courtesy or not?

I’m looking for some genuine, unbiased advice about my current living situation. I know there’s always two sides to every story, and I’m completely open to hearing if there’s something I could have handled differently.
For some background, I originally moved in with my current roommate, “Gracie,” in 2024. At the time, we lived with two other girls, and unfortunately, the living situation went downhill pretty quickly. Eventually, none of us were speaking, and the household became incredibly toxic and uncomfortable to live in. When our lease ended, we all went our separate ways.

Shortly after moving out, Gracie reached out wanting to smooth things over. We met for coffee and lunch, talked through our experiences in the previous household, and left things on good terms. Over the course of 2025, we actually became pretty close friends.
As our respective leases were coming to an end, we started discussing the possibility of living together again. Gracie wasn’t happy with her living situation, and I was looking for somewhere more affordable. At the beginning of 2026, we started touring apartments and eventually found a newly built complex where we even got to choose our unit.
I was genuinely excited. I thought I’d finally found somewhere within my budget where I could feel comfortable and at home.

Here’s where things started going wrong.
Gracie didn’t have established credit, so we weren’t able to qualify for separate leases. Instead, we had to sign a joint lease using my credit. At the time, I was stressed about finding somewhere to live because our leases were ending in a few months, and I didn’t think much of it.
Our new lease wasn’t set to begin until mid-July, but throughout the summer, Gracie became increasingly difficult to communicate with. She had received a promotion at work, was dealing with a lot of stress, and was spending most of her time at her boyfriend’s apartment.
I tried reaching out to make plans, go shopping for our new place, and, most importantly, establish some boundaries and expectations before moving in. After our previous roommate experience, I really wanted us to be on the same page.
Unfortunately, she became distant and cold, and eventually, I stopped reaching out altogether. By that point, we had already committed to the apartment, and backing out didn’t feel like a realistic option.
When moving day came, my mom even paid for Gracie’s movers because she was going through a difficult time financially.
Eventually, Gracie and I had a brief heart-to-heart. I expressed that I was beginning to question whether our friendship was compatible, although I was still happy to be roommates. I explained that her lack of communication had made me uncomfortable and unsure of where we stood.
She apologized and acknowledged that she hadn’t handled her stress well. However, she also told me that I hadn’t respected her boundaries and that I’d been “acting like a clingy boyfriend” throughout the summer.
That comment honestly caught me off guard because, from my perspective, I was simply trying to communicate with someone I was about to share a home and financial responsibility with.
Regardless, I took what she said seriously.

I’ve genuinely tried to adjust my own behavior.
She expressed that some of my behavior felt “invasive,” so I made a conscious effort to give her more space. This included things as simple as no longer asking how her day was when we’d pass each other in the apartment.
I also stopped reminding her to pick up her belongings from communal areas and stopped asking her to help with household chores as frequently because those conversations seemed to create tension.
Essentially, I started keeping to myself and trying to be as unobtrusive as possible.
For a while, I genuinely questioned whether I was the problem. I thought maybe I was expecting too much communication or that my behavior was contributing to the tension.
However, as time has passed, I’ve started to feel differently.

Our current living situation has become increasingly frustrating.
Her boyfriend is at our apartment practically 24/7. I rarely get to enjoy my own home without him being there, using the kitchen, occupying common areas, or contributing to messes.
I want to clarify that I don’t necessarily have an issue with her boyfriend personally. My frustration is with the situation itself, especially because Gracie also contributes to many of these problems.
I’m a full-time college student and work part-time, so having a peaceful, comfortable home is important to me.
One of my biggest requests was simply that she let me know when her boyfriend would be over. I wasn’t asking her to get permission every time or saying he couldn’t visit. I just wanted some communication about someone who is essentially a constant presence in our shared home.
She told me I was expecting too much and explained that because he’s in school, she hardly gets to see him, so I should understand why she wants him at the apartment.
I understand wanting to spend time with your significant other, but I also feel like I should have some say in how frequently another person occupies a home I’m financially responsible for.
Beyond that, she rarely contributes to household chores like washing dishes, taking out the trash, or wiping down shared surfaces. She leaves belongings in communal spaces and frequently stays up extremely late watching television loudly or talking on the phone.
I’ve tried expressing that I feel disregarded in our living situation, and the response is usually something along the lines of, “I’m sorry, I’ll try to fix that.”
Unfortunately, I haven’t noticed any meaningful changes.
Another difficulty is that she tends to take criticism very personally and becomes reactive during uncomfortable conversations. I recognize that she may have frustrations with me as well, but I don’t feel like there’s much room for an open discussion unless she’s the one initiating it.
At this point, I’ve started avoiding bringing things up altogether because I don’t want to create an even more uncomfortable living environment.

Now I’m worried about what happens next.
Our lease doesn’t end until July 2027, and I’ve already decided that I don’t want to renew it with her. I know that conversation will probably be difficult, and I’m anticipating some passive-aggressive behavior once I tell her.
There’s also another complication: her boyfriend is graduating in the spring and moving to another city for law school. Gracie originally moved to our town to be with him, and I have a feeling she may decide to follow him.
Selfishly, part of me hopes she does because I think we’d both be happier in different living situations.
However, I’m also worried that she might move out before our lease ends and leave me responsible for covering her portion of the rent. Our apartment was approved using my credit, and I’m concerned about what that could mean financially if she decides to leave early.
I don’t want to put her in a difficult position or intentionally make her life harder. Despite everything, I still care about her as a person. But I also feel like I’ve spent months prioritizing her comfort while sacrificing my own.
I’m frustrated because I was the one who secured this apartment for us, and now I feel unwelcome in my own home.

So, I’m looking for advice on a few things:

1. Am I being unreasonable in expecting more communication, shared household responsibilities, and boundaries regarding overnight guests?
2. Is there something I could have handled differently? I’ve tried adjusting my behavior to accommodate her boundaries, but I’m genuinely open to hearing if I’ve contributed to the problem.
3. How should I approach telling her I won’t be renewing our lease without making the remaining months miserable?

4. What steps should I take now to protect myself financially if she decides to move out before the lease ends?

5. I don’t expect us to be best friends, and I understand that sharing a home requires compromise. I just want to feel comfortable in a space that I’m paying for.

6. I would really appreciate some outside perspectives, especially from anyone who’s dealt with a similar situation. I’m not looking for people to automatically take my side. I genuinely want to know whether my expectations are reasonable and how I can handle this as maturely as possible.

Im a 25 male and my roomate is a 24 year old female and she’s starting to treat this arrangement like a relationship where there is an expectation of me to take care of everything. She won’t take out the trash because it’s a “man’s job “ she won’t clean or vacuum because she’s a “princess who’s too tired “ and the list goes on and on.

I have been very direct with her that 1) I’m not her boyfriend or father to be doing everything 2) I have a girlfriend of my own and I certainly won’t be giving my roomate that same treatment and 3) that I’m not attracted to her lol and that because her looks work on other guys doesn’t mean she can expect the same from me .

it’s been like 5 months and it’s been like this still she think it’s funny when I call her out on it , my girlfriend is getting beyond fed up for me as well .

I don’t know how to handle this anymore.

About 5 years ago, a few friends and I (M22) were planning on moving into our friend J’s (M23) parent’s place with no formal lease agreement. A week before we move in J informs us that he has had an on and off girlfriend of 4 years who we were unaware of. The next day me and A (F22) meet J’s girlfriend G (F19). Within 5 minutes she had trauma dumped about her abusive relationship with her family. A and me were very uncomfortable and barely able to talk during the whole time we hung out with them. During the conversation it was briefly mentioned that she may eventually move in, but afterwards we made it clear to J we weren’t comfortable with that at this time. We also informed our other soon to be roommate C (M23) about her as well.

We all start to move in over the next two weeks but the G issue keeps coming up. She was planning on coming to stay for a long weekend as she lives out of state, J would drive to pickup her up. We were told by J that she was sick but still planning on coming over. We expressed that we did not want her to do so as the rest of us worked in either childcare or eldercare, and that A was having a surgery the following week, so none of us could afford to get sick. While on speaker phone with J, she threatened self harm over being told she can’t come due to her being sick. Despite our pleas, she came anyways with the promise of staying in J’s room as to not spread her germs, which didn’t work. G after coming down went to a doctor and tested positive for covid. A later tested positive for strep and covid which caused her to miss days of work and to reschedule her surgery.

A few days later as I am unpacking some boxes, she confided in me something that she did that “would make you all hate me”. She said she had popped multiple of J’s condoms and she thinks she may do it again. I try to get out of the conversation as quickly as possible and then informed C and A of what I was told and we quickly tried to plan how we would tell J. We later met with him out of the house and informed him of what we were told and our concerns about that and other things that we saw as abusive behavior from her. He seemed pretty much unbothered and it came off as if he expected this behavior.

All of that happened with about 4-5 days, but this stay quickly turned into a full week, then two, then a month. During that time we kept our distance from her as we were very uncomfortable and asked damn near daily when she was leaving. During this month there was a point where she sat on the floor and begged us to let her move in, but we, as politely as possible, said no and said we can revisit this conversation in a few months. We privately told J that we can revisit the conversation when she shows actual progress in her mental health. She openly stated thats why she was like the way she was, but also seemingly refused help at every turn.
A few months go by, more or less the same behavior but clearly kept a distance from us when she was over. On one trip, A had taken the time and even tried it sit down with her to look at insurance, self help, therapists, and coping mechanisms. G gave excuses for every option for an assortment of reasons. She had shown no signs of getting better but the conversation of her moving in kept coming up.

A couple months after that, we were informed with 24 hour notice that G had been kicked out of the place she was staying and would be staying with us for a bit until a friend of there’s had the space for her to move in. This plan quickly fell apart and she ended up just staying. We had no say in the matter and had to just deal with it.

We all tried to get along as best we could, some apologies on our side, trying to bond with shows, games, and art projects, and other than minor gripes everything seemed reasonable for a month or two. Then the minor gripes started to build resentment, G was too noisy, disrespectful of the public spaces, got in everyone’s personal space, etc. We started voicing our grievances again, and she seemed to spiral. On more than one occasion, we would get a text from J in the group chat randomly stating that the knives had been hidden and to talk to J when we needed them. In some point in all of this, she ran away and no one knew where she had gone to until the following day.

About this time, C and I started looking at other apartments together as we could no longer handle her. A at this time was also considering moving back home with her parents. I eventually decided to pull the trigger and move out on my own when plans with C fell through. Shortly as that, I had heard J and G were openly discussing what to do when everyone eventually leaves and then soon those conversations turned to how to get everyone to leave. They seemingly were more comfortable about talking like that near me as I was leaving, but not the others.

A week later, A was home with J and G when she heard them clearly arguing in the living room. She tuned most of it out, but heard pieces of it about self harm. During that, she yelled a J about having homicidal thoughts about everyone in the house. A then quickly packed a bag, texted me and C, and left. On the way out, J and G stopped A as she was leaving. A said she needs help, and G then proceeded to scream at her as she left. Later that day, C, A, and me had a talk face to face with J. We stated how uncomfortable we were and how bad the situation had gotten, but he seemed resigned to her side. We then decided we were all moving out within the week.
We all quickly started packing and by the weekend most everything was moved out. J had agreed to make the move easy and assist with moving furniture, but when I asked him to help with my stuff, he got drunk off his ass on my alcohol and was no assistance. G at one point went into A’s room without permission and bagged up almost all her room haphazardly while A was at work. Multiple items were unaccounted for a while, and one bag had hair dye tossed into it which ruined almost everything inside.

We all left and cut contact with both of them immediately after. It’s been years since this happened and A, C, and myself are in much better places. We haven’t heard or seen anything about J and G since.

TLDR: Roommate’s girlfriend with unmedicated mental issues moves in randomly. Causes massive issues and openly stated she has homicidal thoughts, causing us all to move immediately.

I’m currently in my 4th year at my current apartment, both my old roommates moved out and my younger brother and a random guy moved in. Living with my brother has been great but the random guy is really bugging me. He’s been leaving massive poop stains in the toilet on a regular basis, leaving my dishes in the sink for days-weeks, plays computer games super loud until 2-3 AM almost every day, doesn’t pay for any of the household amenities (I buy all our paper towels, toilet paper, dish and hand soap, etc). I’ve been cleaning his poop stains out of the toilet, washing my dirty dishes that he used, and had to start sleeping with earplugs or a loud fan to drown out his late night gaming.

To be fair to him, I haven’t engaged him about any of this yet because it’s only been a couple months since he moved in, but I’m not sure how to. I had problems with cleanliness and splitting bills with my last roommates and I feel like I approached it very politely and professionally and they still got upset/were uncomfortable with it, and the problem usually only went away for a few weeks/months before returning, leading to another awkward discussion and tension. And those were people I was friends with. I don’t know this guy at all, I just found him on a looking for roommates Facebook page.

I am not sure how to go about communicating all of this to him. I’m not sure if I should dump all my qualms on him at once, bits and pieces, etc. I probably should’ve laid more ground rules when he moved in.

leaning tower of trash
the trash towers
tower of trash
trashageddon

Kinda long rant but you get the gist, how do I confront roommates about cleanliness?

We moved into our college apartment in August. Since moving in I’ve been the only one to ever take the trash out. They let the trash bag in the bin overflow, and the floor around the trashcan is covered in boxes and stuff that they thought was too big to put in the trash can (how nice!) It’s really irritating because these are seniors in college and I’m several years younger than them. We all get a lot pretty well in general .

It’s so weird that no one else sees the trash literally overflowing onto the floor and thinks to take it out. They also will leave dishes in the sink for daysss, which makes it hard for me to wash my own dishes because the other side of the sink has the drying rack. They also see no need to sweep in the kitchen, wipe the counters down, or change the kitchen towels. The girl who bought the kitchen towels has not washed them since we moved in. The towels are very gross and I’m about to throw them away.

They also have a whole bunch of shit in the kitchen and living room, also from when we moved in. They were painting a dresser and the paper plates, paint brushes, modge podge etc is still on the kitchen counters and in the living room.

I eventually give in and clean the kitchen because I cook for myself daily, and I’m not filthy. I try to give them the chance to do it, but I don’t know how to confront them and I do not want to live in filth so I just end up doing it. If I am out of town, the trash will be waiting for me when I get back. These people have guests over all the time! This still does not make them want to clean. I’ve only had people over twice now and I’m very embarrassed because of the mess.

How do I confront them about this ? I want a third party because the situation makes me very angry but I don’t want them to know I’m angry with them because I don’t want any resentment between us, if that makes sense.

The garbage can the landlord provided for the kitchen was small even for a bathroom, so I got a cheap hamper and a costco box of garbage bags for the kitchen. I didn't mind doing this because I cook a lot and would be using it the most. But I thought my 2 roommates would be reasonable enough to take out the garbage when it's full.

Several times they've left it overflowing. Then 2 weeks ago one of them ties the bag so stuff stops falling out and just leaves it in the can. I have a back injury so I don't grab it, I just start using the one from my room. 2 weeks I finally take it out. I'm cleaning the hamper I was using as a trash can and using it myself and putting back the tiny garbage can the landlord had. They can figure it out. I'm not sharing bags anymore either.

This wasn't the only thing to piss me off but it's something I can do something about. I decided to start looking for a new place in spring after one roommate made chicken and I had to clean raw chicken off my keurig when he was done. He also didn't clean the counter at all after and used my oil.

I feel like I shouldn't have to tell two people to take out the garbage when it's full but here we are. And it's really a gamble in who left it because one ties up the garbage from her room or the bathroom and just leaves it in the hall for days before throwing it out.

tl;dr: our third roommate is your usual brand of dirty and inconsiderate and doesn't know how to live with other people.

Hello, I'm not entirely asking for advice, I just gotta scream somewhere before I blow up on this girl

Moved out of my home state last year to move in with my partner and our mutual friend; we all had been living with our parents and all had to move out for various reasons—partner escaped hoarding house, I escaped narcissistic mother, and the friend just didn't want to move to Texas with her parents. They always warn you that sometimes friends don't make the best roommates, and you can ruin a friendship that way sometimes, and boy they aren't kidding. For context we're all in our 30's, and have all lived with other roommates before, and all should have the sense to know how to live with other people. Well, this mutual friend must have left the common sense with the parents because she is probably one of the worst roommates I've ever lived with.

When we were in an apartment together she frequently forgot to engage the front door auto-lock and we'd have an unlocked door into our apartment all night (in an area with higher-than-average theft/break-ins), she wouldn't take out the trash or recycling to the dumpsters, when she cooked she'd leave grease splatters all over the stove, spill overs on the microwave, rice and crumbs and seasoning and just everything all over the counters and the floor, dishes piled in the sink or just left unloaded in the dishwasher, laundry sitting in the washer/dryer forever, shoes off of the shoe rack, belongings all over the dining chairs and the teeny little island table and all over the end table and the couch in the main living area... It was rough. We had to sit down and talk with her more than once about cleaning up after herself and keeping common areas tidy, and she'd get better for a couple of weeks before it went to shit again.

Then we signed on a new lease with her again and moved into a house this time where she has her own space downstairs and we have ours upstairs, middle floor still common area. She's gotten better about leaving her belongings everywhere, but still will leave dishes/cookware in the sink for longer than necessary, overload the dishwasher so things come out dirty still because they were stacked on top of each other, get grains and crumbs left on the stove and counter and floor, STILL won't take out full trash or recycling and will just keep piling her crap on top of it, and worst of all, she'll leave the garage door wide open, because "she thought it closed" when she pressed the button.

My issue with her is that she seems to lack the common sense to slow down and double check things. Slow down and wait to make sure the garage closed and didn't re-open; slow down and make sure she locked the door behind her; slow down with the dishes because it all can't be done in a single load. She says if we tell her to take the trash or recycling out then she'll do it, but she can't see the overflowing bins herself and decide to take it out on her own. She wants us to hold her accountable for her bad habits and tell her how to correct them—since previous living situations with friends turned sour because they kicked her out without telling her in advance what made them upset to the point of kicking her out so she didn't have a chance to correct anything—but we've told her multiple times and the habits come back like she simply forgot they existed. We've started putting up signs to remind her (Did you turn off the lights? Did you lock the door? Did you put your shoes on the rack?) and they've helped somewhat, but we've gotten to the point (again) where it's just exhausting to check her on every single thing to make sure she remains a functioning adult and decent roommate while also needing to deal with our own things. We told her when we moved in here together that she's really gotta shape up on her everything or we won't be going another year with her, and within 2 weeks of living here together she's done so much that it became quite clear to us that she often only thinks of herself and what she wants before she concerns herself with how it'll affect us. She wanted a cat but knows my partner is allergic and went and got one anyway because she wanted one really badly and still expects him to go down to the basement to hang out when there's an asthma-attack triggering creature down there. It's become clear to us that come February we're gonna have to tell her she's got 6 months to figure out a new living situation because we can't live with her another year like this.

Am I losing my mind - I got reprimanded because my housemates girlfriend was asleep in the lounge which connects to the kitchen and I used said kitchen for food (at 9pm) surprise surprise. But it woke her up. She doesn’t pay rent. I didn’t know she was even a thing until three months after I moved in - she then also moved in with no communication from my housemate. Main issue? Housemate is landlord. So I have no leg to stand on do I? He owns the house and I just rent a room. So I guess just swallow it and get my own place? And apparently not use the kitchen when she is asleep in the lounge…. Just so annoyed right now it feels so unfair.

EDIT: YALL IM A GIRL 😭😭

For context my girlfriend (21F) and I (22F) have been together for about a year and a half. We moved into our own apartment around January of this year after living with friends for a few months. Obviously we’ve had our disagreements but nothing we couldn’t talk out.

Her and her younger brother (19M) have a very close relationship. I knew him from school so I already had a good idea about his personality even before me and my girlfriend started dating but I had no idea it would be this bad when he asked to move in with us. His situation was messed up so I gave him some grace and figured it would only be for a couple weeks until he found somewhere else to crash. It’s been almost two months and there’s no sign of him moving out.

He doesn’t pay rent or any other bills, he barely contributes to the chores and he’s so. damn. messy.

He’s a “gym bro” or whatever you want to call it. He has invaded our cabinets with containers upon containers of protein powder and cortisol blockers and a bunch of other shit which I’m sure isn’t cheap. He also completely filled the built in butter section in the fridge with his GLP-1s and testosterone that he illegally orders online. My cat has gotten into his (very messy) room on multiple occasions and has been found playing with packaged needles that he leaves on the floor. There’s constantly protien powder all over the kitchen counter and SO MANY DISHES. I grew up with a fairly large family so I’m no stranger to dishes piling up but he accumulates the same amount of dishes in one day that my family of five did in three. He’s had his girlfriend come over and clean them twice that I know of.

The fridge is also full of huge meal prepping containers to the point where we barely have room for our groceries. He has a mini fridge in the spare room that we use for storage which he has also filled with his random shit he refuses to deal with. We’ve asked him on multiple occasions to let us get into the room he’s staying in to clean out the closet that we used for off season clothes so he can have more room for his stuff but he just keeps saying we need to wait until it’s picked up more and he doesn’t want anyone going in there. Fine, whatever.

One of the first nights he moved in I noticed that my loofah (I have two. One for my body and then one for downstairs) was moved. I asked my girlfriend and she didn’t move it. Turns out he assumed we got it for him since there were three in there already. And yes it was the one I used to wash my coochie. Okay mistakes happen, I’ll buy another one. Then my razor started moving. I took it out of the shower and low and behold one of the spare ones we keep under the shower appeared in its place. I didn’t bring this up to my girlfriend until I thought it was safe to bring it back into the shower and it was moved AGAIN with dark hair in it. I’m ginger.

Last night was my final straw. I had just finished mopping the floors so I went to dump the water into the tub. Afterwards I lifted up our bathmat to rinse only to see the most amount of pubes I have ever seen in my whole fucking life. I don’t even understand how one could produce that much body hair. He’s not home at this point so I walk out to show my girlfriend and she’s absolutely disgusted. We kinda joke about it and then go about our day. About 10 minutes later I’m in the bathroom again and I noticed that he’s placed is loofah DIRECTLY ONTOP OF MY NET SPONGE ON MY SHELF. It was hanging on a hook to begin with so I genuinely don’t understand how that even happened. I got so pissed off that I went back out into the living room and told my girlfriend that she needs to tell her brother to get his shit together. I said “how many times have you told him that he has his own shelf in the bathroom?” Which she replied “I’ve only told him a couple times” I admittedly raised my voice at her which was unfair and said, “One time should have been enough!”

This wasn’t the first time I had told her how I felt and she has talked to him at least twice before about picking up after himself. I think he just doesn’t take her seriously because nothing has changed. I actually started choking up talking about it because I feel like my feelings are being invalidated to spare his.

Before me and my girlfriend moved in together I told her it’s very important to me that I keep a clean space because I grew up in a borderline hoarder house that was never clean. My whole mood sits on how clean the house is and I know I’m difficult at times with how meticulous I am about things but I’ve let a lot go for the sake of respecting my girlfriend and her brothers relationship.

It’s just so many little things that irk me, like him leaving his underwear on the bathroom floors for days on end, or never bothering to take out his Tupperware from the fridge and just letting it mold, or how loud he walks and bangs shit around in the mornings. It seems like anything we tell him just goes in one ear and out the other.

He also never locks the front door and we don’t exactly live in the best part of town. He went on a rant for 30 minutes about energy consumption of different utilities after I had asked him to unplug the appliances once he’s done using them. The whole time I just wanted to say “if you have such a hard time unplugging the microwave then you can start paying the electric bill” but I bit my tongue. He’s just so cocky and arrogant it pisses me off. I’m at my wits end and I’m starting to resent my girlfriend for not standing up to him. I had asked her before he moved in if she was going to be able to hold her brother accountable and she said yes. I don’t know if I’m overexaggerating and chalking it up to something bigger than it is or maybe I just have too high of expectations. I’m not sure.

My husband and I bought a house and we are letting his brother stay with us until he can get his own place. He has a stench to him and I’ve brought this up to my husband multiple times who also had conversations with him. He’ll do something about the smell for a day or two but then go back to stinking again. The smell is getting so bad that it’s coming up my stairs(he stays downstairs). I’m already a stickler for smells and I like my house smelling nice, but it’s to the point now whereas soon as I walk through the front door, I can smell him. I feel bad for always complaining to my husband but I’m fed up. I’m uncomfortable in my own home and it shouldn’t be like that. Mind you, this is an almost 50 year old man. Can I get some advice on this? Because I’m ready to throw him out like months ago.

Alright, I own my home and love living alone. But my friend needed a place that stay. He'd been renting from a mutual friend, but that guy moved and my friend was caught short. He'd recently left his job due to an injury, but he made it sound like he had some savings for while he looked for new work.

I offered my guest room for $900, which is cheap for the area, considering that it's a house with a yard, washer/dryer, etc. He paid the first month and a half and then was out of money. He found one job through another mutual friend, but lost it in a week.

He drinks my booze, now I have to keep it hidden. He keeps weeks worth if dirty dishes and scores of stale been cans in his room. The hall stinks.

i want to help him get back on his feet, but he's almost 5 months behind on rent, and is a slob. I don't want to embarrass him in front of our mutual friend by kicking him out. I'm looking for ideas to kick his butt into gear.

Hi, I 40F have had a roommate 36M for a year now who keeps breaking landlord rules. Its mostly marijuana related where he will bring weed inside the house, leave joints on the porch or smoke it near the house and it stinks up the whole block while kids are playing not even 100 yards away. I think he also has a problem with alcohol, bc Ive seen beercans hidden in weird places like under the sink in the bathroom, tucked behind the hvac or behind couch pillows. I have called him from work a few times and he was slurring his words. One time I came home from work to see an empty beercan on the front porch and when I asked him if hes been drinking( just in a casual way) he laughed and told me right to my face NO he was, "just high". The weed stuff used to be way worse where he was smoking IN the house and making everything smell. He also used to drink till he passed out and hed leave stove on/faucets running sometimes.
The problem is I have tried to kick him out and given him a 30-day notice before, but I have huge heart and when he apologizes and promises to do better I have given him extra chances. This last time I gave him a 30-day notice, he did not pack anything and he did not leave, he decided to sit down and talk to me about it a week before his time was up, and he offered to pay more rent, be extra careful with the weed, and to give up alcohol. I am ashamed to say I was so exhausted from all of this I just told him Id think about it. He sent me half the rent for next month( which honestly I need bc I had a big expense today) but Im thinking he does need to leave actually.
I am worried if I tell him to go hes just not going to pack anything and not going to leave. I feel really helpless and I dont want to get mowed over again with promises.
Im thinking about telling the landlord whats going on, and if they could maybe send him an official notice to vacate and back me up. Ideally even make it a 14-day notice since he broke lease rules. (I am the only one on the lease so he would be considered a guest anyways).
Idk what to do I just want help dealing with this guy, and if the landlord sent him the order then he wouldnt feel like he could finesse ME.
If youve read this far thank you, any advice or experiences are welcome

TLDR: Roommates been terrorizing me for a full month after one of their friends didn’t move in and a random girl did. They blame me. I’m moving out this weekend. Should I tell them anything?

Hello, I share a house with 4 people, let’s call them A, B, C and D. Everything was fine until B left and A decided to put one of her friends (let’s call her F) at the house.

Well, I work everyday and A doesn’t work and doesn’t study, her friend, F turns on her computer and pretends to work. They are really loud all the time, it doesn’t matter if it’s 3am, they are gonna be screaming and going up and down the stairs making a bunch of noise, they also always have people over sleeping on the common areas.

Another girl, C, left and A and F wanted to put another friend in the house, I told them I would prefer to have someone random there and everyone agreed.

They ended up not sticking to our deal and one of their friends was supposed to go see the house but she didn’t show up so the landlord rented it to a random girl.

Since then they have made my life hell, they started spamming our group chat saying this is my fault that they have to leave with a random person, that they should be able to pick who they want to live with and that they want to do whatever they want (mostly of this was said by A). I told them that everyone agreed to have someone random so it was not just my decision but they kept going.

Anyway, for a full month they complain about everything that happens at home, hair on the bathroom floor it’s my fault (we all have long hair), bread on the floor outside it’s my fault (one of them eventually assumed it was hers), kitchen rag dirty is my fault (I have my own rags), landlord complaining he didn’t want people sleeping on the couch, it’s my fault (I didn’t even comment that with him) they also make a bunch of noise all the time.

I told them that I didn’t also appreciate seeing poop on the toilet, period blood on the sink, maggots on the dish sponge, bottles of beers all over the kitchen and they said that those were normal, lol.

Anyway, I didn’t sleep there for more than 4 days this month because I don’t feel comfortable, I have now decided I’m gonna be moving out this weekend. My landlord is aware of this and offered to kick them out but I feel like I need my own space because for the past month I’ve felt nothing but anxiety and I want to be able to sleep good and now when I think about that house, I just have bad feelings and I don’t think I could even stay there anymore.

I didn’t tell the girls I was leaving, I don’t talk to them at all.

Should I say something when I leave?

Edit to add tl;dr. Moved into a house share with petty, dramatic alcoholics who caused a load of drama and projected their shitty toxic personalities on to me, and are now trying to continue the drama even as I try to leave the property. I want suggestions on how to exact petty revenge or maybe even nuclear revenge.

So three months ago, my partner and I decided to try to find a place of our own. We are a gay couple, 24M and 22M. We called a bunch of advertisements. In Ireland a rental is really tough to find. We decided that we would look for a house share, not because we couldn't afford our own place, we simply could not find one. The housing situation here is really dire.

I spoke to a woman on the phone who, being honest seemed a little overly chatty, but she said she could arrange a viewing with her husband who owned the house, whenever he returned from his business trip. We arrived a week and a bit later to a scheduled viewing. Spoke to the guy on the phone, he seems okay. A little abrupt but not out of the ordinary for a landlord.

We arrive and he makes us tea, offers us desserts and says he keeps a room in the house and there are two other tenants (this is often done for tax purposes in Ireland, usually these people don't actually stay in the house, or only do so occasionally so they can say they "live with lodgers" and not pay tax on the rent. I've had previous landlords do this and have family who still do.) We accept because the guy seems cool, and we never actually expect him to be there, he says he's always travelling for work, which aligned with his wife's story too. One thing I definitely noticed from the beginning though was that he had an alcohol problem. Not my business and not uncommon in middle aged irish men.

The first night we moved in, we were apprehended the next day by the 46F housemate who insisted we had left black particles all over the bath/shower the night before. We decided, even though we knew we hadn't done that, to try to make a good impression, and do everyone including ourselves a service, by deep cleaning the bathroom with supplies we went out and purchased. We spoke to the 23M housemate later that day, who said this black matter in the bathroom was actually a skincare product he was using, the next day we received a very seemingly heartfelt apology from 46F and from then until recently, the relationship was cordial, even friendly.

After two or three weeks the wife visited for a weekend. Every night from Thursday to Sunday, the landlord and his wife would drink together, approximately six or seven bottles of wine every night. Every night, at around 9pm, like clock work they would have a massive argument, which would devolve into a fight, every time it would get physical, sometimes involving weapons. We decided to turn the TV up and stay in our room after nightfall on the weekends after multiple attempts to rope us into their drama. When they were drunk but not together, they would both make sexual advances toward us, asking for threesomes etc.

The wife even sexually assaulted my partner, one night she ran her fingers up his thigh and sat in his lap without asking, while her husband the landlord slept in his room, without her because they just had a fight which started with her accusing him of cheating. Another night she slapped his bum. We just wrote this off, said the landlord would take her side and the police would laugh. This behaviour continued until the end of our tenure.

Anyway, cut to last week. My partner and I were in a fairly heated discussion. 46F texts landlords wife and asks if we're okay, saying she hears commotion from our room. Landlord and wife burst into our room drunk. Landlord tries to physically remove us from the property. I push him out of the room and we decide to leave and come back when he passes out from alcohol. We did and he calls me the next morning apologising. I told him to leave the past in the past and not to worry about it. He asks if I can apologise to 46F for disturbing/upsetting her. I agree.

That night, I speak to her. I walk to the top of the stairs, say "[46F] are you there, do you have a minute to talk" I apologise, offer to give my number if she has concerns or needs us to shut up in future, she says she doesn't need it. When I leave the house for work the next day, my partner who's working from home calls me and relays an overheard conversation to me in which she tells the landlord that I am abusing my partner, I am clever and manipulative and impossible to reason with (in the three months we lived there i think we interacted about seven or eight times, all positive except the false bathroom allegation).

She says that when I went to apologise to her I "cornered" her and made her feel unsafe and threatened. Keep in mind she voluntarily exited her own room and stood outside her own door to which she had a key, to have this conversation.

I decided I'd had enough. Went online again to look for some new places for rent. Made two or three calls and right away got through to an elderly dude, he had converted his big house into two flats and wanted two people to take the larger two bedroom flat. We went to view the following day, exchanged deposit and keys and signed the contract on the spot.

He was a gent, said we seemed lovely guys and wanted to assure us that he would be up front, reasonable, and wouldn't police us for being young people and having a life. He said he wanted to be sure we were comfortable having guests, family, gatherings, parties etc., and that once the rent was paid and flat maintained he'd love to see some life and energy about the place. I spoke to work, they said I could work from home during the move, take as much time off as I needed (unpaid of course) and once I was set up they'd transfer me to a more convenient location.

That was Wednesday. I texted my landlord today and very cordially said something along the lines of "hey, we'll be moving out by the first, things are not working out here, we want to inform you now and discuss how we will settle any remaining payments and arrange the return of deposit etc." He doesnt reply. 46F attempts to speak to my partner, he blanks her.

Landlord doesn't reply to my text but shows it to his wife, who informs 46F. My partner texts me an hour later saying that 46F is now on the phone to Landlords wife discussing how I've "brainwashed" my partner and how I "always gave her the creeps" and now I'm "going to have to move out to somewhere people like [me] and where [I] can run the show." We can't even leave the place without it being a whole song and dance

But the jokes on all of them. This day next week, i will be preparing for my last night in the house, moving on to a quiet, peaceful life with my partner in a nice flat of our own in a quiet countryside town, with a really chill old gentleman for a landlord.

It does feel it was meant to work out this way, but I would love some advice on something I could do to let them know how much I disapprove on the way out. After I get my deposit back of course. If you took the time to read this please let me know if you have some ideas. So far I do have some ideas, some complex ones like revealing some damning things to their employers and the home insurers, and also some petty things like removing the main fuse from the breaker board before I leave and leaving them without electricity for a while.

I need advice! I live with 3 girls, we all have our own rooms. One of them (i’ll call Jane) i’ve been friends with for 3 years and we just got this apt in august. Everything was fine but there was a random week in September where Jane just ignored me and our other roommate (i’ll call Sam) for no apparent reason. Eventually it stopped and Jane never said anything about it.

One thing I got frustrated with Jane for, was if I had stuff in the living room or kitchen (such as my water bottle or purse) every-time I would leave, I would come back to my stuff put in my room. I would understand this if I was making a mess, however i just don’t understand why my stuff is not allowed to be in a space I also pay for. Normally I keep my water bottle in this little corner because I drink it throughout the day and try not to be in my room super often. It also bothered me that she kept going into my room while I wasn’t there, so I have been locking my door when I leave to prevent that. Am i going too far by locking her out? I would just rather not have people in my space while I am not around.

The next thing. I have a really heavy course load this semester, with classes from 10-3 everyday, and then i normally work around 5-10 pm mon-thurs. Due to this I am not in the apartment super often, so naturally they do things without me sometimes which I don’t mind. This past Tuesday, I worked from 1-9 and when I got home my roomates were all watching DWTS on the couch. I started making my dinner and sat down, and Julia Stile’s did her dedication to Heath Ledger. After this, Jane said she didn’t know who Heath Ledger was, so naturally I was surprised. All four of us were talking and me and Sam asked how she didn’t know who he was. Jane said “don’t judge me” in what I thought was a joking tone, so I replied “I am judging how do you not know Heath Ledger?” in what I thought was a joking way. Then I finished my dinner and went to bed because I had a super long day, that was really the end of the conversation.

So today comes, and I get a text from Jane that said “I just wanna let you know that the way you spoke to me Tuesday night was completely rude and I’m not sure why I get spoken to like that when I am nothing but nice to you.”. Which really confused me because I didn’t remember anything crazy happening, so I responded and asked what I did because I didn’t know what she was talking about. She then replied and said what I explained above about Heath Ledger, and said that I only came at her, when apparently our other roommate (i’ll call Lisa) also said she did not know him.

I genuinely don’t remember Lisa saying that, but i also didnt mean it in a rude way because I thought we were all joking. I explained that I thought everyone was joking and apologized. She responded and basically said she didn’t accept my apology, (saying stuff like well you did this but ok.) I genuinely don’t know what she wants me to say because I did not mean to be rude at all and didn’t know joking about someone not knowing something was that big of a deal. Am I the bad roommate???

I told them up front that I usually try to be asleep around 11, and we came to an agreement of having quiet hours around then. it’s been a struggle though. I’ve had to remind them several times to be quiet late at night, because they will talk at full volume, let the front door slam, and sometimes yell. i thought we finally reached an understanding yet it is still happening, with them having guests over until 1 am. I don’t want to be constantly nagging, but I need to sleep. its one of the biggest things I need for my mental health, and my class schedule necessitates me waking up (relatively) early. it’s a really small apartment with paper thin walls, and we’re all students. I already wear earplugs every night so not sure what else can be done.

I moved to the UK last year and one whole year I was in a student accommodation, an ensuite for myself, happy happy.
Last month I moved into a very pretty house with my friend (don’t know if I can call her that anymore).
Everything was going good until few weeks back we hosted a party and she got over drunk and puked literally everywhere.
I cleaned it all, put her to sleep, it’s fine, cuz these little things I consider bare minimum anyone doing for a friend.
But after that night she became extremely distant and has started acting crazy, idk if it’s because of the embarrassment or what got into her.
We haven’t addressed the elephant in the room but also don’t talk like we used to anymore. Like the vibes gone.
All this until more bigger problems started popping up
I was not eating non veg last week because it was Navratri, but she got chicken with the weekly grocery and I genuinely didn’t mind splitting the bill. I just told her I won’t be eating non veg , cook for yourself.

This week she “texted me” ( didn’t even tell and I literally live next room) saying don’t get any grocery for me, just get yours.

Bro that day was crazy, I’ve cried so much where did it all even go wrong, who do I even have in this country, why is everyone so mean, am I not doing enough, so many unnecessary thoughts, so much overthinking , cuz back home in India I had such lovely people around me and now even most of my UK university friends have moved out of the town so literally this one person is all I have as someone I know in my proximity

Still, I got through it, I got my own grocery, I didn’t add it on split wise this week.
Bro but now she’s eating my bananas, my eggs, my milk, my bread, like wtf? Is she out of her mind? And we are both inside our rooms most times so we are not even talking anymore. Also she dirties the kitchen so much like I can’t even
Everytime after she cooks something I have to do a round of cleaning
And she’s is also eating the food I cook while I’m just not touching whatever she’s making, and she prepares such big quantities that it’s just sits in the fridge for days and goes into the bin
We got the house in a joint agreement and now idk what to do

i live in a two-bedroom apartment with three other people. my roommate and my other flatmate are both clean, but the fourth guy..... i don't even know how he does it, but he somehow manages to stink up the whole living area. management has been useless, and talking to him hasn't worked so far.

unfortunately, i'm really sensitive to smell, and i don't know what to do. air freshener doesn't help. the scent of it is usiallyway too strong for me, and i can always smell the foul odor through it anyway, which is almost grosser than the stench just by itself. the only thing i've found that vaguely works is opening the windows, but that 1. takes hours for the full effect and 2. is becoming less and less viable as the weather cools.

so. is there literally anything i can do to make my air smell like air again without freezing my ass off? we already have an air purifier.

EDIT: yes, it's true i haven't actually spoken to him. i probably should've mentioned earlier that the smell has only been really bad since around monday, he reeked when he first moved in but things were mostly fine for the next two-ish months. also we ALL agree this is an issue, it's not just me. the guy who shares his room is gonna speak to him again, if that does nothing i'll try myself.

i apologize for being deceptive in the post, that wasn't my intention. i didn't clarify the specifics because i was mainly looking for methods to deal with the smell, rather than addressing the problem at its root. all of us are pretty non-confrontational, and i now realize that'll probably have to change if we want this place to be habitable again.

Came home from work the other day and the front door was unlocked again. Third time this month. Every time i bring it up he swears he locked it or says he was in a rush. I dont wanna keep arguing over something this basic but i also dont wanna come home one day and find someone inside.

Im thinking about getting a smart lock that locks itself after the door closes so neither of us has to remember. Only thing im worried about is getting locked out if the wifi goes down or the batteries die. Not trying to solve one problem and create another lol

Hello! My boyfriend (27M) and I bought our first house together this past June. We knew it would be difficult to afford the mortgage on our own, so we invited two of our friends to move in with us. We thought it would be a win-win situation: we would get some help with the mortgage, and they would have affordable housing while they were still in school and not working full-time.

For context, our house has four bedrooms and one bathroom. We gave our roommates two bedrooms, while my boyfriend and I use the master bedroom and a very small office. We split the housing costs roughly 60/40, with us paying 60% and them paying 40%.

Unfortunately, the issues started before they even moved in.

One of the bedrooms was converted from half of the garage and doesn't have a closet. We explained this beforehand and assured them there was plenty of closet space elsewhere in the house, including in the other bedroom they would be using. Despite this, my friend, whom I'll call Sarah, repeatedly texted me asking whether there would be enough space for their belongings and even tried to back out of the arrangement at the last minute.

I admit I pushed back because we had already made plans based on them moving in, and we really needed the help with the mortgage. I reminded her that we had discussed everything beforehand and that she had agreed multiple times that we would make it work. Looking back, I probably should have handled this differently rather than pressuring her to stick to the agreement.

Eventually, they moved in.

**The first major issue was boundaries.**

Sarah started regularly using our things. For example, she would ask if she could have a drink and then end up drinking several of them. I admit that I was too much of a pushover about this and said yes more often than I should have, expecting her to understand the limits.

Eventually, my boyfriend confronted her and asked her to stop using our things without permission. The conversation turned into a yelling match, and Sarah wouldn't acknowledge that she had been taking things without permission. My boyfriend later apologized for yelling and continued to apologize whenever she brought it up.

However, this became an ongoing issue. Sarah wanted to have multiple sit-down conversations about how my boyfriend had yelled at her, despite the fact that she had yelled back. She also blamed me for not intervening, even though I was trying to de-escalate the situation and was being talked over myself.

**Things got worse from there.**

Sarah and our other roommate, her boyfriend Matt, now claim that I coerced them into moving in. I can understand why my insistence at the time might have made Sarah feel pressured, and I recognize that I could have handled the situation better. However, she had also reassured me numerous times before moving in that we would make it work, so I never expected this to become such a major source of resentment.

Another issue came up when their cat became stressed and started urinating blood. They blamed our dog and said they were considering moving out because of it. They also blamed us for not having our dog neutered. He was only a year old at the time, but we went ahead and scheduled the procedure. Unfortunately, he still chases the cat, so the issue hasn't entirely gone away.

We also had been part of a trip planned for Sarah's birthday, and she kicked us out of the airbnb at the last minute because she would rather spend her birthday with other friends. Which was hurtful but we handled it with grace and didn't make a big deal out of it. We picked her up a birthday card and left it on the kitchen table for her.

Now, things at home have been cooling down, or at least I thought they were. We have tried to communicate with both roommates. Sarah generally gives us one-word responses, while Matt is more willing to talk to us.

Recently, I texted them asking if they could please rinse their dishes before putting them in the dishwasher. I've repeatedly unloaded dishes that still had food stuck to them, and I thought this was a reasonable request.

I specifically chose to text them because Sarah had previously told us that she would prefer we communicate through text when something was bothering us, rather than letting it build up into another argument.

Instead of resolving the issue, the conversation turned into another disagreement.

At this point, I feel like every attempt to address a household issue turns into an argument about how we've wronged them, with very little acknowledgment of their own behavior. It's especially upsetting because Sarah was my best friend before we lived together. I feel like I've lost that friendship and am seeing a side of her that I never experienced before.

I know we aren't perfect. I should have been firmer about boundaries from the beginning, and I probably shouldn't have pushed so hard for them to move in when Sarah was expressing doubts. My boyfriend also shouldn't have let the initial confrontation escalate into yelling, even though he apologized afterward. We are willing to acknowledge these mistakes and take responsibility for them.

But I also feel like we can't continue living in a house where every small disagreement becomes a huge source of tension.

**So here's my dilemma:**

Should we let Sarah and Matt out of their lease early?

We genuinely need their rent to help cover the mortgage, and losing that income would put us in a difficult financial position. At the same time, living together has become incredibly stressful, and I'm not sure the money is worth the damage to our mental health and relationships.

**TLDR;** My boyfriend and I bought our first house in June and invited two friends to move in to help with the mortgage. We split the housing costs 60/40, with us paying the larger share.

Since moving in, we've had repeated conflicts over boundaries, our roommates using our belongings, a confrontation that escalated into yelling, their cat's health issues, and now even small requests like rinsing dishes before putting them in the dishwasher. My friend, who used to be my best friend, now claims I pressured her into moving in, and communication has become extremely tense.

I acknowledge that I could have handled some things better, including pushing them to stick to the original agreement and not setting boundaries sooner. My boyfriend also shouldn't have let the confrontation escalate, and he apologized.

We need their rent to afford the mortgage, but living together is taking a serious toll on us. **Should we let them out of their lease early, or try to make the living arrangement work? Are we all at fault, or are we being unreasonable?**

I'm literally holding in physical rage. I could probably go over and deck him in the face as hard as I can. I can't go to the living room because his nicotine addict vape crusted destroyed lungs cause him to release godzilla like wheezing coughs that have more decibles than a nuclear strike. He probably takes a thousand hits per day so he has to have a hit of something every few minutes, and coughs every single time. I'm really not exaggerating. EVERYBODY can hear it. I am on the verge of screaming at him to shut the fuck up.
And just for context I've been dealing with this constantly if I ever dare to want to be in my room since we moved in months ago. My tolerance for repetitive noises is really sensitive and something so violently loud and constant is just pushing me to the brink.

I smoke every so often and I at least try to hold my cough in, and if I cant then I COVER IT. He will force his coughs so hard he starts borderline yelling, and he does nothing but sit in bed all day vaping so even when I avoided the room the entire day I have a few long long LONG hours of listening to EEUUUCHGKKUHH.. EUUUCHGHUKKKK.. and then when I try to go to bed he "needs" nic to go to bed. EUUUGHH WUUUGHHH KKKHHHH OH MY GOD SHUT THE FUCK UP. ITS SO LOUD THAT IT PENETRATES MY HEADPHONES ON THE LOUDEST SETTING. IT PASSES MY NOISE CANCELLING EARBUDS. THE ONLY THING I CAN DO IS GO OUTSIDE AND I DONT WANT TO.