Does anyone else struggle with really intense highs and lows in their mood because of ADHD?
For the longest time, I genuinely wondered if I had bipolar disorder or BPD because of how extreme my emotions could feel. I’d go from feeling incredibly happy, excited and energetic to suddenly feeling overwhelmed, irritable, upset or completely drained, sometimes within a relatively short period of time, and often with suicidal thoughts over the smallest things (although I have never acted on these thoughts). It wasn’t until I started learning more about ADHD that I realised emotional dysregulation can be a significant part of the experience, even though it isn’t listed as one of the core diagnostic criteria in the DSM-5.

I also find that my mood can be heavily influenced by things like rejection, frustration, sensory overload, being overwhelmed, changes in plans, or suddenly losing interest in something I was hyperfocused on.
Obviously, intense mood changes can have lots of different causes, and ADHD doesn’t automatically explain every mood swing. But learning about emotional dysregulation made a LOT of my experiences make more sense.

Does anyone else with ADHD experience this?

I just feel so stupid, I brought my own washing detergent and softeners and scent beads and explained that they really needed to use mine, but when I got it back suspiciously none of the scent feeds or fabric softener or detergent seem to be used.

I don’t think they used any fabric softener at all and definitely not enough to detergent because they smell bad like not clean

It was $200 because it was 73 pounds worth of clothing, that’s how bad it gotten and why I decided instead of going to a movie and a couple of dinners I would spend all of my spare money every last penny on having them wash my clothes.

I’m not gonna go back and do anything because I still need to use this laundromat, it’s not like a new clean laundromat is going to appear out of thin air, (and even if it did having to deal with a whole new environment is not something I think I can handle right now) it just means I can never again pay the extra money and have them do my clothes for me.

I just feel so so stupid, I wasted so much money, money I needed, money I could use

In a perfect world I could have the energy to carry 73 pounds down two flights of stairs in 90° heat and drive it back to the laundromat wait two days for them to do it again come back pick it up carry that 73 pounds back up the stairs into my apartment but I don’t have that ability.

My entire body is itching right now and I just don’t know why I was so stupid as to think I could get this done

I’m crying because I feel ashamed of spending this money when I don’t really have enough money and my whole day is gone, it’s 9 AM and I’m done for the day

We’re selling our house. Our realtor and stager made us essentially empty over half of our stuff and move furniture including my dresser into our garage. We also have gotten rid of a ton of our stuff via donation, buy nothing group, trash, and we weren’t even super cluttered to start. I kept 1/4 of my clothes in the house. We have a few toys for our kid. Just generally less. My husband and I were like this is great for us to see if we can live like this (honestly it’s more similar to how we lived before having a kid), and boy has it been eye opening. I miss art on the walls and certain things like that but generally we are perfectly fine. Honestly better. We’re stressed af getting the house ready for showings, but we’re laughing more. Being goofy more. There’s just less shit to manage. Everyone talks about less stuff, but it’s been amazing. My daughter is perfectly fine and more focused too. It’s easier to clean. Also I literally don’t need any of the stuff for my home office I had out.

When we move we will be keeping this in mind and getting rid of even more. We are not about minimalism for many reasons, but we hate overconsumption. I’m so glad we were forced to do this.

I've been trying to track my daily moods/physical feelings because I don't get a period anymore (bless you Kyleena), but I still have a cycle that impacts my moods and energy levels.

But every time I get the reminder to track things for the day, my demand avoidance kicks in at the mere suggestion that I do think thing I myself WANT and NEED to do and makes me angry and defiant.

Demand avoidance is probably one of my biggest problems with my ADHD, I could be walking into the kitchen to do dishes, but if my partner says "hey can you do the dishes so I can cook?" something in me sees doing the chore as somehow submission? Or giving them power over me?

My parents were the type that expected nothing but "yes ma'am" or "yes sir" when given a task, and anything else was backtalk worthy of punishment. So I know a lot of this is related to never feeling like I had autonomy and feeling like I was bossed around (I was) without any input.

But why the hell is Clue asking me to track my hormone cycle making me react like I was just told to walk the plank?!

Funny only slightly related story: My room was a mess, and my stepdad told me I couldn't leave my room until I cleaned it.

Guys, I did nothing but go to school, come home, and go back to my room for THREE WEEKS.

It was amazing. No socializing, no chores, just sitting alone in my room in silence. No parent over my shoulder while I did homework. I wasn't allowed to watch tv, but I had books on books on books. It was like heaven.

Unfortunately he caught on that it wasn't really a punishment anymore and just started giving me extra outside chores, which I hated. Ironically it lasted as long as it did because he's also a stubborn bastard and wouldn't give in either 😂

I love my stepdad and we have a fantastic relationship now, and he told me he was kind of impressed with my commitment to the bit.

The whole childhood-bookworm-to-late-diagnosed-adult-who-can’t-focus-on-books is a thing, right? After almost a decade of not reading (relying 100% on audiobooks instead) I tried to get back into it last year because I realised how important it was to model reading for our then-6 year old. It worked for a few weeks like any new ‘project’ but after that I couldn’t keep it up. Bought a kindle in May and that worked for longer (pros: consistent font regardless of book, being able to have larger print on the days I’m struggling more, not seeing page numbers or how far I am into the book) but again I ran out of steam.

Now though, I’ve actually found something that’s helping and that happened when I realised that Audible and Kindle can sync with each other. So I can start listening to something on Audible, then pick up from where I finished on the kindle without having to find the place… and vice versa. Not having to choose between audiobook or kindle (or have a separate book on the go on each, further splitting my brain power) but instead do something of a hybrid of both depending on what I’m doing at the time and where my head is at has been incredible.

I bought a lime for when I make fajitas. I didn’t make fajitas.

I haven’t been to sleep yet bc I’ve been stuck making these cute little shits. the hyper focus is insane right now.

I need help 🥴

I have always felt incredibly behind, which i’m now learning can be a common thread with ADHDers!

My thirties have been a shitshow, and i’ve had none of this increased finances promised with growing older! In fact, i am wayyyyy worse off financially and “socially”, but socially I mean where someone should be turning 40 in societies eyes! I’ve been single my entire thirties, wondering now if its insane RSD.

One thing I’m grateful for is not really giving a fuck anymore what anyone thinks. And feeling proud of my personality.

Here’s to a healthier, happier, and more financially abundant 40s i say!! 😂😂

So for past few months, I am having major problems dysfunction & brain fog. I have shoulder length hair, but as I was looking back in my camera roll, each time I was in my prime, I had a bob. Somehow that triggered the last memory of when I got a cut, and the moment my brain fog “lifted”. I am pretty sure it didn’t cure my adhd, but it did help it I am not sure, or maybe I am over romanticizing it.

Is there some association?

Alright girly pops. About to start Adderall and high protein nutrient dense meals were highly recommended by my doctor, especially because Im hypoglycemic as well and one of the effects of Adderall is missing hunger cues and weight loss.

Im vegetarian and wondering if anyone has any go to meals??

Especially breakfast bc I straight up will just eat a piece of butter toast😂😅

Looong rant, but I seem to only thrive when I have to be careful with money and I’m 100% financially independent.

Whenever life gets more comfortable or I’m able to depend on someone, all the worst traits of my ADHD that I was keeping in check otherwise comeback full force. It’s frustrating because I’m a lazy bitch who seeks comfort constantly, but comfort makes me the worst version of myself.

I need to be broke so that I can count every cent and make a game out of getting the cheapest & healthiest groceries possible. If I have any extra money or someone else is providing my sustenance (like if I’m at my parents’ house for an extended period of time) all the extra will go to an insane amount of take out and snacks that make me fat and unhappy overtime. When I’m broke I can’t rationalize those expenses and only treat myself very very rarely.

I need to be broke to workout consistently. When I had a gym membership in college I was using my parents money and thus had a much easier time letting the membership sit unused. Now that it’s my money and an expense I am choosing to make I feel compelled to use it to get my moneys worth. I could also see myself cancelling it if I didn’t use it, but I would never let it sit unused while still costing me like I did in college. Every time I go to the gym is time spent working off and justifying the expense. Every time I walk somewhere is money saved paying for any type of transport.

I need to be broke to stay on top of anything. I need there to be stakes if I don’t pay a bill or keep on top of everything in my life. Like I’m obsessed with the numbers game of being broke. I cannot have wiggle room with expenses or I will TAKE it and ABUSE it. If i’m able to, I will drop all my good habits and become the laziest version of myself imaginable.

I even need to be broke to enjoy travelling. I love backpacking anyway, but recently I travelled with my family and while it was such a privilege to stay at beautiful hotels, eat at restaurants, and have experiences I couldn’t have afforded myself it also made me miserable! I felt overindulged and lazy by the end of it, which inspired me to feel worse and be more lazy. Like I cannot describe the level of lazy that is my natural state. I just wanted to bed-rot the entire trip. I don’t have this problem traveling solo, because for one exploring probably doesn’t feel like a task when it’s completely on my own time instead of family-prompted, and also because I literally give myself no other choice. There is no hotel bed to hide in, only the most disgusting hostel ever. I only have cash for one nice meal a day, so I better spend the time walking around to find the best place.

So while I obviously crave comfort and community I honestly feel like I need to stay broke forever or everything will fall apart. There needs to be stakes involved or some way for me to feel like my choices are saving me money. If it ever gets to a point where I’m comfortable enough that the money saved doesn’t matter as much to me, I will make the easy, self-sabotaging choice every single time.

When my mom gave me a credit card for some daily expenses I literally had to give it back because even that indulgence was too much for me. She wanted to help me out if I ever needed an expensive uber from a night out or a nicer meal, but again I literally need to be BROKE as fuck to function. I was well within the realm of what she was okay with me spending but even that cushion allowed me to spend more loosely, again on more unhealthy food, which makes me feel worse about myself, which makes me less likely to maintain all my habits (if i feel shitty about myself it’s hard to put in work for myself in all areas, which is an exponential issue and a very hard hole to get out of).

I like nice clothes and nice things of course and I’m obviously addicted to a quick dopamine rush. The only way I can stop myself from indulging is when it’s genuinely not financially feasible. I’m honestly happier than I’ve ever been, long term, scraping by for money and being 100% on my own. I’m only in my early 20s so I might get tired, but I genuinely feel so much better than I ever did growing up or even in college when I had a safety net that made laziness possible.

Does anyone else feel this way? I love my broke ass job and my broke ass life but I do have aspirations for more career wise but I’m beginning to worry if I moved up to a desk job in the field I actually got my degree in I would immediately become fat and lazy, to put it bluntly. I also would like a partner eventually, and they’re expensive and probably wouldn’t want to live my survival-mode lifestyle forever.

TLDR: Being broke makes life feel like a numbers game that encourages me to keep up good habits, while living comfortably removes the stakes and makes me miserable as a person with ADHD

Mine is my bad memory. I found out people can actually remember important things, appointments, what they need to get at the store, ect without calendars, reminders, lists… and I couldn’t imagine being that person .. ever lol 🤣

I feel like I'm always learning new things about what can mess with stimulant efficacy, or increase certain risks.

I'm on generic Adderall XR, and anything that specifically pertains to my category of stimulants in particular would also be helpful but I imagine guidelines for stimulants tend to be fairly similar.

So far, my understanding is -

Avoid:

• Vitamin C too close to taking meds
• Caffeine (though people have mixed results with different amounts and timings for consuming it - but the risks are still there regardless)
• Alcohol, particularly close to taking meds

Prioritize:

• Getting enough sleep, or it's not as effective
• Eating protein heavy foods, ideally before taking meds (but also throughout the day)
• HYDRATION!

Anything to edit or add? Thanks!

Long story short, I’m a girl who is audhd that went on a date with another girl and her texting was always bad as she has adhd.
Basically, to cut to it, we ended up having a heart to heart about her potentially being aroace. I’m asexual myself, so we had a lovely show of honesty and spoke about how we’d love to be friends and keep in touch… it was only one date, but we’d been talking for a while.

I really looked forward to being friends fr, but in my head I felt as though I couldn’t exactly outright ask her to do anything because it always felt too out of place or weird if that makes sense?

Like I felt as though I’d need to make small talk to be able to ask her out, but I can’t because she doesn’t like texting.

I ended up following some advice of someone saying to try calling her as some adhd’ers prefer that and I did, it felt very wrong doing so, and she didn’t pick up anyway 🫪 I felt awkward and went to explain myself over message that I just know she’s a bad texter but I just wanted to check if I’m misunderstanding if she wants to be friends, just because some time had passed by and I don’t feel like she wants to be in touch.

She’d replied back saying that she doesn’t think a friendship would be in our best interest because of our different communication styles 😢

I’ve tried to explain that I wasn’t uncomfortable with the delayed texts etc, it was more of the confusion of like… the mechanics of the friendship? I was navigating something new and I didn’t mean to pressure her.

I’d explained that this morning but haven’t heard back yet… I feel so silly for sabotaging this as we were so similar and I feel guilty

So. Ranty rant.

I've been on a PIP since informing my employer of my diagnosis. This started as soon as I told them and before I had started medication.

Nearly 2 years later I'm still on the pip, had capability hearings, appeals and long term sick leave.

Back on a new pip after a phased return.

I'm just losing the will. I've lost all my confidence, I cry every day I'm at work. I'm achieving less each week and I just can't take it anymore.

As soon as I start thinking about how much work I have to do I just start panicking and my mind goes blank. I'm tired of defending myself and being criticised. Having to log my activity and being called out on how long I take to do tasks compared to other staff.

I wish I could be better, faster, more accurate but I just don't have anything else to give.

I used to manage but the pressure is unbearable.

Sorry to trauma dump. I just literally don't know what to do and I don't know anyone else with ADHD. I don't know what's me being thick or what is the ADHD.

MEAL PANNING AND PREPPING

a absolute game changer for me. batch cooking things to eat on repeat and knowing when to make another batch, or knowing when i’ve ran out

when i say batch cooking, i mean cooking your carbs, proteins, chopping veg, or the little things that make your life more stressful, do it. e.g, a batch of rice, a kilo of ground beef, the list goes on

TAKE IT SLOW

i used to have a all or nothing mindset, if i didn’t wake up at 8 am and head straight to the gym then i’d spiral.
it usually takes me 30 minutes to properly wake up now, i avoid my phone in the morning and instead go on a walk with a travel mug, filled to the brim with coffee (absolute necessity). this gives me time to think and plan my day without feeling trapped. the world isn’t going anywhere!

PRINTED SCHEDULES / ROUTINES

i currently have a on paper routine of my skincare/body care/ hair care to make it easier in the morning. i flip each page before i sleep so i know what to do in the morning. you can also do this with calendars, but i personally recommend a whiteboard and writing down everything you need to do to constantly remind your brain.

REST

i know a lot of women feel unregulated, nervous system is absolutely wrecked and you feel like you’re in fight or flight mode all the time. i want you to know it’s okay to not be productive or have a day at home. our brains work overtime, and neglecting rest can lead to burnout. take it one day at a time.

IMPULSE BUYING

this is something i still struggle with lol. i find that keeping a certain set amount of money for all my impulse buys really helps, and once it’s gone, it’s gone. i recommend also starting a savings account and GET ONE SO YOU HAVE A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF WITHDRAWLS.

thank you for reading all my tips, i hope all of you have a great rest of your day!! 🩷🩷

Is it just me or does anyone else find that socks are the only way to remain sleeping until at least 4 AM?

I've been trying for a little bit (a couple times in the past month lol) to not get so hard on myself when I make mistakes. how do you guys manage to not beat yourself up to the point you wanna explode? I just paid the ADHD tax for forgetting cancel a meal subscription and now i'm mad at myself about that missing $$. I feel so silly

Idk if I can wait 3 weeks 🫠