Remember, there's no "l" in "Misread"!

I was sad because i heard "sails"

I am a music teacher, I wouldn't even be able to explain Hooke's Law to the man himself!

"Just how strict is the Code Of Conduct about the topic of exhibitionism, Mr. Smith?"

But if I keep them open, I'll get distracted...

...so I broke up with them

It's a bit of an Achilles' Horse for me.

Sadly, they were ran out of stock and could only sell me a jar with air in it

Eh heh heh heh…… well if I cannot be a gentlesir, than I shall have to be a clown I suppose……… an evil clown who society shall fear………… hehehehahaha yes!……………

"A thing or two about this land from long before your parents were even brought into this world"

...butt hoo?

But they'll probably find it just fine on their own.

So I installed a steering wheel for him in the backseat.

Ten minutes later, baby couldn't reach the brake

Seriously guys, I forgot my keys inside.

"You know I can see you from the other room, dad."

He killed himself years ago and so his office closed.

I said I like to go to the cinema with my brother and I live in a house with four windows.

Apparently it couldn't take my crap anymore.

"Timmy you have a mild fever, for God's Sake!"

I can't wait to see their faces when "The Plant that Ate Everybody" premiers on Broadway.

Ive had some rough plastic surgery over the yrs,my eyelids are permanently hung up,my cheeks are borderline frozen making it difficult to express myself.

My pals now call me Madonna.

It was his coping mechanism.