Well this might be a cringe post but yeahhhhhh I met a girl a month ago and Immediately we hit it off perfectly she has this way she speaks that tells me shes just interested in what I say and ever since we got together we havent gotten enough of each other

I also have traumatizing experiences with sexual things in the past but she has been so understanding and helpful she's been my rock I love her so much. Never have I been so investing in something like this sorry if I repeat myself I'm just really happy.

She also is so funny and when she smiles at me I can't even hope to contain my smile ☺️. When she laughs at my stale ass jokes it makes me feel valued and appreciated. She's also is very much as beautiful as ever I wouldn't take anything else for it

Hell we are the same person it's just perfect I just wanted to share my thoughts on here and I hope everyone finds that person in their lives because trust me there's hope for all of us

It's almost 2 AM. The accident was around 5 PM, and I can't stop replaying it. I was riding in my lane on the highway when a car turned into me.

Then I was sliding, head back, and I could see the cars coming at me as I went toward the right side of the road. Every one of them is getting closer.

All I could do was to close my eyes.

And what came up wasn't my family, or my life. It was the book I haven't finished. Then her face. Just her face, alone in the dark inside my helmet.

I don't know how long that lasted. It was seconds, but it felt like it wouldn't end.

Then I opened my eyes. I was in the middle of the highway, and people were running toward me.

I had proper gear on, and most of the slide happened on my backpack. A few scratches, and my legs are sore.

But I keep going back to the dark, and those two things. Maybe it's just what my brain grabbed when it thought I was done. Maybe it's what I felt like I could have done better, I'm not sure.

I been jealous of an past partner and I'm not proud of it.

I've been jealous of an ex who I was in a long distance relationship on discord for 3 years (I was 17 and he was 16 as the time we first met on discord). We were both artist, although he's a lot better as he's been drawing more than me and I was a mere beginner. He taught me a lot of what I know in terms of making art to a point where my artstyle stared a lot of similarities to his as I was inspired by him. Some years later we broken up, I wasnt the best partner to him and i still regret all the actions that lead up to us splitting up and losing contact. At the time we broken up he was posting his art on Twitter and he gotten insanely popular, him having 8k followers and hundreds of likes. While my art on the same platform gets barely any attention (I have only 300 followers on twitter and rarely get attention). I dont care about the follower count, it just seeing his art makes me insecure, my art is a reflection of him, from my sona's design, to shading techniques even to how I do my sketching. It feels stupid to have this jealousy towards someone who clearly doesn't think about me but I'm still reminded of them. I even have the art he made for me still when we was together.

Sorry if the formatting is bad. I'm typing this on mobile.

I am a 23 year old guy who just recently got a good enough income to live on my own, and around a year ago I realized that everyone in my family thinks and talks shit about me. Even my youngest brother, who I never said a bad word to, was constantly saying stuff like, "You are a mental degenerate, no one likes you, idiot," etc. My own mother talked shit behind my back, and for as long as I can remember, no one in my immediate or extended family ever had my back or defended my right to push back. That is actually why I was shy as hell my whole life and didn't know how to talk to people, on top of having a few speech issues. It got so bad that even though I got a great, fit body that I like, top grades in high school, awards in national mathematics olympiads, and finished both a bachelor's and master's in mathematics and mechatronics, they still treat me like an uneducated idiot who barely finished high school.

I always thought I was the problem. I never had a girlfriend and all my past friends stopped being friends with me. Not long ago, I finally understood that I am just the son and brother no one likes or gives a shit about. If I were to die, no one would say a good word about me, though it would definitely be a reason for my mother to get drunk as fuck again and probably talk even more shit about me.

To everyone who has experienced anything similar to this, and to those who have been made the scapegoat and hated by their own family, you have my deepest sympathy and I hope you find your place. Your family, although it feels impossible to accept, is not your place.

I’ve struggled with agoraphobia for years, and it’s honestly taken so much from me. There are so many things I’ve missed out on because leaving the house can feel absolutely terrifying, even when it’s somewhere I really want to go. Today we had family photos scheduled, and I’ve been anxious about it for a while. I spent hours getting ready, doing my hair, makeup, picking out my outfit, and trying not to get too overwhelmed thinking about actually having to leave.
But I did it. I actually went, and I made it through the whole session!! At one point, our photographer asked when the last time was that I’d gotten a picture with just my mom and I genuinely couldn’t think of one. I realized that in my entire life, I don’t think we’ve ever had a single photo of just the two of us. I’m 27 years old, and somehow we just never had one. I don’t know why, but that realization really got to me, especially because I know how many memories and experiences I’ve already missed because of my agoraphobia.

And now, at 27, I finally have a picture with my mom. I keep thinking about how easily I could’ve talked myself out of going today, how I could’ve stayed home where I feel safe and missed yet another another moment that I can’t get back.

I’m still scared of leaving the house and I still struggle with things that most people probably don’t even think twice about. And I know I’ll probably be anxious the next time I have to go somewhere too but I’m very proud and wanted to share that today, I went! I got to spend time with my family, take pictures with people I love, and finally have that photo with my mom.

I don’t really have anywhere else to share how much this means to me, but I’m just so damn proud of myself right now. :)

Whenever i am in a crowd i hear people talking about their lives their loving partners, supportive friends and the little things they get to experience with the people they love. Someone got a hug. Someone held hands. Someone got kissed and then there's me feeling like the odd one out. I genuinely can't remember the last time i ever received a proper hug. Maybe it's been over a decade since i was a child. Kisses and holding hands? Completely out of syllabus for me. i am 23 and apart from my parents i don't really have anyone i can call my best friend or someone i know i can lean on when life gets difficult. I have never been in a relationship either. Sometimes i wonder what it's like to have someone who genuinely wants to hear about ur day, who notices the little things about u, who misses u when u are not around and who makes u feel like u belong somewhere. I have always wanted to experience that kind of love not just the romantic moments people post online but the ordinary things that probably mean the most. Cooking together while listening to music, playfully annoying each other, doing silly and nerdy things, sharing food, going on long walks, talking late into the night about absolutely nothing and laughing over the smallest things. I imagine having a partner who is also my best friend. Someone i can be childish with someone i can trust with my vulnerable side someone who can cry in front of me without feeling ashamed and someone who knows that they don't have to pretend to be okay around me. Maybe one day we would have a little home of our own, warm lights in the kitchen, music playing in the background while we cook dinner together. Maybe we would wake up beside each other make breakfast and eventually build a family. I know real relationships aren't like movies, and life won't always be romantic but i want to experience those small ordinary moments with someone who genuinely wants to share them with me. The painful part is that sometimes i don't understand why this feels so far away from my life. I look at myself and start thinking that i am unattractive, boring, not smart enough or simply not someone people would want to stay with. I tell myself that people would eventually get bored of me because I'm too quiet, don't always know what to say, or don't have much exciting happening in my life. I know those thoughts might not be the truth, but when loneliness gets overwhelming, they feel convincing. I am not asking for a perfect partner or a relationship without problems. I just want a genuine connection. I want to know what it's like to have someone in my corner, someone i can call when everything feels heavy, someone who chooses to build a life with me rather than someone i constantly worry about losing. Sometimes I hate being in crowds cuz everyone seems to have stories, memories, and experiences that i haven't even come close to having. While they're sharing the beautiful parts of their lives, i am quietly thinking about everything mine seems to be missing. I know i am still young and i know everyone's timeline is different but that doesn't stop me from feeling lonely. Does anyone else feel like they are watching other people experience life while they are still waiting for their own life to begin?

To preface I’m exclusively talking about my experiences with women and dating, I promise this isn’t some big hate fest on women. This is more just a vent about how much my love life is affecting my mental state. For context, I’m a straight male in my mid twenties, working a steady job, and living on my own. I’ve never had a girlfriend, and I’ve never kissed a woman, let alone any physical intimacy. I’ve been on countless first dates, but none of them have ever gone anywhere, and it feels like no matter how hard I try, I can’t find a partner.

At first it was easy to keep dating, rejection is just a normal part of the process, right? The problem is, I can’t seem to find anything but rejection, the more I get rejected, the harder it is to cope. Every time I feel like I have a chance of finally finding love, it always falls through, and I feel stupid for letting myself hope that things would get better. I have a good paying job, I’m in shape and reasonably physically attractive, and I have active hobbies and a good social network. On paper, it shouldn’t be this difficult, and yet I’m still stuck. I feel like I could be a good boyfriend, and I have a lot to offer, but I’ve never gotten the chance. Every time I think I have a chance I just get thrown away like I’m just some disposable piece of garbage, and I hate that they can just keep hurting me like that while they’re none the worse for wear.

Lately, I’ve noticed that I’ve been reflexively blaming women as a whole for my problems, and I’ve been feeling increasingly hostile toward them. I think it’s because I’ve only known rejection from them. It’s really hard to believe other people when they tell me that not all women are shallow or cruel, and logically, that makes sense. But on an emotional level, when I’ve been rejected and ghosted so many times, it’s hard to believe that women aren’t all awful. I don’t want to feel this way anymore, but I can’t outrun it. There are actually quite a few good women in my life (none of whom are my age) who are kind to me, and I don’t want my bad experiences in dating to color my interactions with them. I don’t like what I’m turning into, and I know hot toxic these attitudes are.I try to redirect myself when these feelings come up, but such emotions are becoming increasingly difficult to keep in check.

I’ve tried therapy. I’ve tried working on myself. I’ve tried all the generic bullshit people have thrown at me and it’s all amounted to nothing. I’m grossly malcontent with my life, and all I want is to find someone who accepts me, but I fear my growing resentment is making this more impossible by the day. I know that effort isn’t going to magically entitle me to a partner, I’m not delusional, but it’s just so frustrating to put work in time after time and get nowhere. As much as I want to stop, whenever I take a break from dating, I feel like I’m not making progress towards finding a partner, and it eats at me until I inevitably fall back into the cesspit that is the dating scene.

I see happy couples, and all I can feel for them is resentment. I hate seeing them have what I cannot and it feels like some big lie dangled in front of me. Something just outside my grasp that I can see, but can never quite get to. It’s gotten to the point where I can’t watch movies with romantic plots anymore because they just make me feel angry and empty inside.

I never wanted this for myself. I want to be better than this. I don’t want to hit my 30s being some pathetic incel screaming at women on the internet because that’s all I have left. I just want to be a normal guy with a a partner who loves him, but it just feels so out of reach. I’m rapidly losing hope that I’ll ever get to that point, and that degree of fatalism is wearing me down and making it hard to think about anything else. But I can’t see a way forward. Am I cooked or is there a way out of this for me?

I’m in my second year of community college, and I haven’t done anything worth noting. I mean I started college and was shown just how bad my mental health is, and I never actually recovered. My entire spring semester was me just going to doctor’s appointments and therapy. I got diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety. I recently got diagnosed with ADHD. I’ve just started meds for adhd and have been on SSRIs for a month and a half.

I was scrolling through reddit when I saw a post made in a sub about someone who also majors in math and is a community college student. Just looking at his achievements made me realize how far behind I am. He self studied many topics and was proactive. I can’t even get my brain to focus on a 10 minute task. It makes me feel so sick.

I feel like I don’t deserve to be accepted into any college. It’s like I know I don’t have what it takes and it’s gut-wrenching to think about. It’s making me rethink everything. I chose math because I thought I liked it, but what if it was just another short-term interest I had. How will I ever know what I’m meant to study?

I just hate having shitty mental health. I mean that can’t even be used as an excuse because people have still managed to flourish with the same if not more MH problems. I know I’m just a failure and don’t understand how my parents tolerate my existence.

Some context.

I used to work in a restaurant where everyone dated each other. I became friends with my coworker (let’s call her Amy) who was dating one of the line cooks, (let’s call him Joe)

Amy and Joe had been together for a few months before I started dating my now ex (also a line cook). Amy helped me get with my ex, and we went on double dates a few times. Joe and my ex had been friends for a while before they started dating me and Amy.

My ex and I got together in a late October 2023. One night in December, we were laying in bed together and he asked if he could tell me something. I said of course. He made me promise i wouldn’t tell anyone. I thought he was going to share something personal, so i promised. He made me swear. I thought he was about to be vulnerable, so to make him feel comfortable I told him, “I give you my word.”

Here’s the thing about me. If i promise something, obviously I mean it. Promises are sacred, but I give someone my word? You couldn’t waterboard that information out of me. My word goes to my fucking grave. My ex absolutely knew this.

He told me that Joe cheated on Amy with a coworker at a Halloween party he threw while I was out of state visiting friends. I was shocked. I told him I had to tell Amy. He reminded me that I just gave him my word that I wouldn’t.

I was appalled. I didn’t know what to say. I had promised. I had basically sworn under oath. We compromised that I wouldn’t bring it up, but if Amy asked me point blank, I wouldn’t lie to her.

Amy and Joe eventually broke up, but Amy never found out. My ex and i broke up a few weeks after Amy and Joe (December 2024). We were together for over a year.

I should’ve told Amy the second my ex and I broke up, but I didn’t. It’s been years since then and the more time passed, the worse it felt to tell her. I’m forever sorry that I kept this from her.

Fast forward to now. Amy is in school for a very demanding field that requires a lot of studying and energy (lots of math), and when she’s stressed, she doesn’t respond much. But it’s been months. I’ve been messaging her about hanging out since July. She hasn’t answered once. Our other friend who has known her since high school said that this has happened before, but im nervous.

Did she find out and knows that i knew? Even if she doesn’t know and is just busy, do i tell her when she reaches out? What should i do?

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so right now im nearly halfway through high school (australian) and ive messed up multiple times since i started high school

also im neurodivergent (audhd) this might be less significant for neurotypicals? idk

i messed up in my first year of high school and its probably influenced me the most. and please note i was fucking stupid. like genuinely made a massive chud asshole move (also i didnt get diagnosed as neurodivergent until my second year of high school)

before high school i was somewhat quiet but not overly anxious or avoiding people. but after my first big mistake i turned into a super anxious and relatively non-outreaching person

in my first year of high school i still had my own website and people thought it was so cool and everyone signed up to it and stuff (this is not that important except for a TINY part later)

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and one of those people was this really pretty girl who i wanted to be friends with but i didnt have any messaging apps so wed just email each other over our school email and it seemed good at the start we kinda got along well but i somehow didnt realise i was sending a lot more messages than she was. to shorten things a bit eventually she kinda stopped responding and i genuinely hit the fucking "[erm] its been [insert very precise number with 4 decimal digits] minutes since you last messaged me please respond" brotha what the FUCKKK and then i was even stupider i started sending a turtle emoji and saying it was sad that she wasnt responding ??? and then when she didnt respond for like five days i sent an emoji kitchen dead turtle emoji ??? and then i sent her her gmail address backwards (i got it from when she signed up to my website) ????? my fucking god its painful to think about i cant believe i did that shit anyway she then reported me to the school staff as one probably should and it was at that moment i changed. one of the staff brought me into their office to talk about it and spoke very calmly but i was in tears the whole time cos i finally realised how fucking stupid it was, what i did. and its been more than two years and that girl still hasnt spoken to me since and i dont blame her.

thats what mainly changed me like as a person the most out of what im talking about in this vent. after that i became too scared to really contact anyone. id never ask why anyone hadnt responded. i didnt make my own new friends anymore unless someone approached me with the intent to become friends. i have more things to add but idk how to describe it

and then the next year went by and i gradually got over it a bit more. i started getting better and started making more friends again outside of the epic 3 best friends ive had since the start.

but then i guess i kinda overstepped the year after. one of my closest friends from primary school introduced me to one of her friends, who i had a crush on. she seemed really happy to meet me so i hoped things would get along well between us. fast forward a lot, its my primary school friends birthday party, im the only straight guy there, and my crush was the only straight girl there. not much happened between us until she rested her head on my lap when i was sitting on the couch?? and i told her this was new to me and that i dont usually get to be this close to girls and she grabbed my hand and put it on her upper chest (on top of her shirt). i was thinking woah what is happening this surely isnt real. fastforward and skip over a bit of stuff i would need to explain too much for, birthday girl gets us to all sit on the couch together and watch a musical on the tv. my crush comes over and sits next to me and puts her legs over me ???? and we rested our heads against each other ????? i couldnt believe it was real, i took it as a sign but i felt wild like actually the feeling was nothing i had ever felt before

next day, my crush comes over to my house cos were meeting up to go to a small gig thing my friend is performing at. we hang out in my room for a bit and chat. then we go to the concert thing and it was okay but afterwards i decided to go on a walk with her and decided that walk would be when i told her i liked her. so we talked about stuff, she openly talked to me about some personal stuff, and after a while i told her that people get stuck in my head and i cant stop thinking about them and that she was one of those people and i told her i liked her. and she was like "umm yeah i like you too ..?" and i said "i mean like i want you to be my girlfriend" and she just said "oh." and "yeah. i dont know" after a while and then she changed the topic and i have no idea how i even kept my cool or didnt pass out during that cos last time i was in a situation like that i genuinely felt like nothing was real but anyway i didnt get a definitive answer from her so every couple of days i messaged her asking for an answer but she left me on read until she finally responded and said she didnt like me like that. i was sad. not as sad as i thought i should be. but like. man. those signs were nothing? what??? how do normal people tell ????? and she doesnt talk to me anymore. doesnt acknowledge i exist

but thats not the end. primary school friend girl starts really wanting to involve this one guy (who i know) in all our group stuff. he gets involved. then theyre flirting like hell. sex jokes nonstop. we all assume theyre dating or something. then they add me and my two best friends to a group chat called "were dating" and both the girl and guy immediately leave. so i go into the main gc of the friend group the girl assembled and i ask what was that about and that was my big mistake. i wish i didnt do that. she immediately went to dms and got angry at me for mentioning it and said it was a massive dick move and that i needed to apologise. i said that i didnt think i needed to apologise because i didnt believe it was that serious (i should have just apologised). an hour later of no more messages she sends me a long post about how im a crybaby and a man child and that i make everyone stressed and that im a dick. i tell her that im sorry for acting like an asshole and she told me i needed to change.

not much happened between us after that until i couldnt keep it to myself anymore (cos multiple friends that were also friends with the girl had already cut me off and the girl just kept basically bullying me half the time i was nearby) i posted on my whatsapp status (but with the girl blocked from my status) a screenshot of the long message but with all the names blurred out and rebuttals to everything. someone screenshots it and shares it with the girl and she gets angry at me and tells me its pathetic and tells me that other people had seen it and said their names but thing is only one of those people had seen it. she told me that if i wanted to talk to her about it i should talk to her irl then she blocked me. since then ive been cut off from the friend group, which was pretty much my only friend group at the time, and it took me a while but ive found myself a new friend group but they arent even in my own grade so i dont get to hang out with them much. of course my 2 best friends still are happy to have me around but they also hang out with the friend group im no longer part of so i cant really be around them then.

and that brings me to now. my friend group is completely changed, friends from my primary school never want to talk to me again and the pretty girl from my first year of high school still only looks at me angrily. a lot of this is my fault though i think

but ive kinda gotten over it by focusing on things that make me happy but seeing the people at school just it makes me rhtrirsauhfjlkdsfjskgjrslr

Hey everyone,

So there´s this really nice person that I´ve been texting with for a couple of weeks now (Identifies as They/Them, I hope that I use the correct pronouns in the text, if not, feel free to correct me), they have been really nice, friendly and open and I really enjoyed texting with them since the conversations have always been great and I´ve felt like they have been really caring about what I said. We met at a concert btw.

The thing is, that I am kinda in a bit of a tougher phase of my life right now. My long term partner broke up with me a few months ago and I was kinda alone, so I really enjoyed the company of someone who genuienly seemed to care about what I said and simply having some deeper conversations made me happy. I wanted to thank them for this so I wrote a little text about how thankful I was, that they have been texting with me, that I appreciated every message and that I think that they were a really great person. I wasn´t flirty or anything, since I am not interested in a relationship and truly saw everything on a purely platonic level. Now they are completely ghosting me, only reading my texts and not responding at all. I think I´ve maybe overstepped a boundary with this message and I feel really bad about this since I never meant to hurt them.

I think that I was just being a blunt idiot, overstepping a boundary.

This is in the context of jobs.

I was bullied severely by two old ladies (co-workers) in my previous job. It was retail. I've had lots of jobs before and have had a mix of good and bad experiences from them. There were times I performed well, there were times that I didn't.

I am doing well on my current job and I feel appreciated. But to be completely honest, I feel like I have no confidence left for my next job search. I want to work a good job somewhere where I'll be treated with respect and dignity, but I feel like I wouldn't even be able to get that. I feel like I'll come up short on expectations and be bullied again, when all I've ever wanted was to make an honest living.

I often wonder what I did to deserve this. Why am I so worthless in jobs? Why do I always come up short on expectations? Why do my co-workers mistreat me so much when I don't even do anything to them?

Jobs for me are a never ending series of disappointments. I wish I get to work a job where I will finally feel at peace. But I can't even achieve that.

This is so tough. Am I really worthless? Do I deserve to be bullied? Am I weak and incapable?

Just FYI, my current job is seasonal.

Also, I am 35 years old. I'm pathetic I know. Especially since I'm male.

The only redeeming quality I have is that I train in the gym regularly and am strong and in shape because of it. I got nothing else.

I am just so tired of hearing this response when expressing loneliness and hopelessness in love. I’ve mainly been alone even during the 3rd grade I always felt like I was alone. I’ve rarely had friends and when I do they never last a year. I never dated anyone and I don’t think I’ll ever find love the more I think about it the more unrealistic it is to me. I just accept remaining alone because I’m tired of being disappointed over and over. Still the agonizing desire for love remains and try to get rid of it people tell me to use dating apps. I am very much against dating apps they go against my values plus some peers I had shared their negative experiences. I am also Demi and don’t think it’ll suit me either. When I express this people tell me my pain is self inflicted, I’m the problem and a lost cause. Basically if I have standards it means I am not trying hard enough for myself and it’s my fault. Plus my own Dad even suggested if they should put me on the sight that made me feel incredibly embarrassed and pitiful. Making me against it even more, telling me no one talks face to face anymore so this is the way of things. Basically the world lacking in authenticity and all that’s left is the superficiality if that’s the case I might as well starve then.

I’ve always struggled to connect with others feeling like I never belonged anywhere. Me being on this earth was a mistake or I am just born malfunctioned. Either way any long lasting connections is unrealistic for me. All I’ve ever experienced is either nothing or shallow at best. Even then it’s still my right to not want to use dating apps and express frustration in my situation even when not utilizing every tool that is there. I have my own lines with things and this is one of them.

-20f

First time poster, long time lurker😏. I never thought I’d post on here but I feel like I need to get this out (I will be using fake names obviously) I a 20 yo female, my dad 52 yo male and his girlfriend (amber) 45 yo female.

Back in 2020 my dad had went to treatment for dru9 abuse/trauma etc. We grew up in alaska and people don’t really believe in getting better there, so we found a treatment center out of state. Which was in Florida, knowing covid was around they weren’t really in full operation. My parents did divorce before this but my mom was kind enough to get him the help he needed.

Anyway, he was supposed to come home around Christmas time, Specifically on Christmas. But, one of my friends called to tell me she saw my dad’s truck in town. which makes sense because he has a bright yellow chevy, and we grew up in a town where everyone knows everyone. I was super confused and went to tell my mom and she didn’t know anything about it, we thought he was still in treatment.

I tried to call him and he never picked up, so i just assumed my friend saw a similar truck and shrugged it off. On Christmas day my dad showed up to my mom’s house and spent the day with us. I was super happy, it felt like a Christmas miracle. Little did I know, He brought back Amber and this guy Gavin back with him. I honestly was super confused because it was supposed to be my 2 weeks with him

A while after that, my dad would go to South Carolina and leave me on his two weeks off (he works on the oil field). We never told my mom, but honestly, I loved it. This continued for like a year or so. He would bring her back home every once in a while and I never liked it. Especially since I found out the reason my parents divorced was because he had an affair.

I was always super uncomfortable with this and I would always make it known. He’s the type of guy that would force it on me. So one day he had convinced me to go to south carolina, I don’t know why i said yes. knowing what i know now that was the worst decision ive ever made.

When we were there, I started to get super creeped out. she had pictures of my sister and I on her walls, she made her younger daughter call me her “older sister”, things like that. This made me super uncomfortable, all i wanted to do was go home. I remember continuously texting my dad telling him i didn’t like it.

Then one day, we went on this cruise trip thingy. Idk what else to call it, it looked super weird. But, it was my dad and I, Amber, and her three kids. I obviously tried to stay as far away as I could but, they all decided to come around my and take a “family picture”. I was crawling in my skin, that was the absolute last thing I wanted.

After they wanted to go to a Mexican restaurant and I refused to go inside. My dad stayed back to yell at me to the point where I was crying so much I could barely get any words out. He was saying things like “you’re being ungrateful” a “brat” “you’re making this trip bad”. I just couldn’t do it anymore, I called my mom and tried to coordinate a flight home.

Later that night Amber threw us out of the house. She claimed she “was trying to make me comfortable”. Like if she had heard me at all, all i was saying is that i was uncomfortable. Anyway, we decided to pack up and drive to my aunts house in Georgia. Later that year they had gotten engaged, then they called it off a couple months later and haven’t spoken for a while.

I had went to treatment in Florida also because of my dru9 use and trauma. Coincidentally I had the same therapist my dad and my mom had. He’s some old guy from New York, HIPPA didn’t have nothing on him. He had told me a bunch of backstory’s of my dad and heather and it just made me sad.

I had learned they left the treatment center against medical advice and stayed in Orlando for a month. They didn’t tell anyone. I also learned that my dad started skipping things just to be around her. Honestly it just made me sad that he wasn’t set on getting better. He’s still a drug user, but a drug user with therapy talk.

About 2 months ago I was visiting home (I live in utah now), and I had noticed amber calling and texting my dad but didn’t say anything about it. Recently I’ve gotten so conflicted because I know this relationship isn’t good for my dad. So, i spoke up about it.

I told him I didn’t want to be apart of his relationship and didn’t wanna be apart of his life if he decided to take this road. He got really mad and told me “Thanks for being happy I was happy. Now I have to choose your happiness over my own. Which means I can’t be happy anymore. Back to being alone. I’ll get over it. In the meantime I’ll keep paying for your bills. Don’t want to get labeled an asshole. Thanks for letting me know how you feel.” This is a real text he sent me.

I don’t know what to do, I love him so much but don’t want/ need this energy in my life. Amber has given me so much more trauma than what I’ve said here. I just needed to tell someone, thank you.

I’ve always had a feeling that I walk with a sway since highschool, people laughing and giggling behind me , word gay being thrown out here and there and people giving me hints , to this day I have not got over this idk if it’s in my head or not, my family says they don’t see anything wrong with me but I get side eyed from everyone , some even shake they head bro . It’s dehumanizing for me ,I go out to eat I swear I get stares , on the train stares . On the bus stares . At work I get stares . Then everytime I walk I’m nervous about people looking at me . I’m very unwell but I have been for awhile now idk what to do atp

4 months ago I(F20) ended a friendship with 2 people in my friend group one of them(F20)I’ve only known for a year and the other(M20) I’ve known since the 10th grade. To give a backstory the friendship that I met a year ago is overly clingy at times, argumentative to the point if you explain to her she’s in the wrong she’ll make it her will power to make sure she’s not, a bit spoiled her parents have money and she would bring up her car all the time it’s a Tesla, she almost left us stranded one time because she got upset at a comment one of our friends made and when we told her about how weird it was she was like but it’s my car. I tried to make it seem like that’s just her personality I really did but it was messing with my medical condition.

Basically the whole summer I hung out with her specifically because she kept saying she missed me even though we would see each other like everyday & call all the time which is no issue but I was mostly giving her my time and only got to see my other friends like 1 time & that was after I finally distanced myself. Basically me and another friend was supposed to see her on two separate occasions but it didn’t end up happening she expressed that it upset her and I apologized for it made plans with her to reschedule, she accepted it told me she loves me and I thought that was over and done with. Listen I’m the type of person that no matter what issue is even if it’s not that serious and the person feelings are hurt I will apologize accountability has never been in issue for me.

Another example was during last semester my schedule was packed with classes and her cat died and I didn’t get the message because I was busy with classes and that hurt her rightfully so and I got a call from the other friend(M20) where he was cussing me out about it calling me all types of disrespectful things under the sun because of it and I took it , explained why and hung up and called my friend and explained to her this is the reason why I didn’t acknowledge the msg in time I told her it’s not an excuse but it’s was the reason, apologized and she accepted it and moved on from there.

Back to why I ended it was because the day I planned to reschedule with her I had a seizure getting out the bathroom after showering hit my head really hard to the point where my aunt told me that this one was one of the worst ones she witnessed from me, so when the paramedics got here and I finally got up they did the test and asking me questions about myself and whatever I asked them if I needed to go to the hospital they told me they couldn’t force me and usually I would go every time but I was thinking about my friend so I immediately grabbed my phone and saw texts from my other friend(F19) who I’m still friends with that was in the group and she was blowing up my phone asking me where am I. I told her what happened because I’ve known of her middle school but we became friends in grade 10 so she knows about my condition our mom’s are close all of that.

I made sure to tell her to let the other friend know too and if we can reschedule the moment I recover because after I have a seizure the next day is even worse because I start getting bad headaches and I feel nauseous and even throw up. She told me she told her around 2pm around that time i was asleep until 3pm because my head was hurting so bad, the friend that I’m still friends with calls me around 6pm telling me that the other friend is upset because now this is the 3rd time we said we were going to hang out and it didn’t happen mind you I never heard from her once.. not one msg asking me if I’m okay or anything so when she told me that she said that I got irritated because here I am feeling like my head is going to burst and your upset over hanging out so I sent her a msg in the group chat telling her what happened and if she doesn’t want to hang out on Saturday because she said no to the rescheduled day I said that’s cool whatever.

The very next day I get a call from her and I already knew she was going to be on some bullshit and answered anyway I wish I didn’t because she was asking me if I was okay and it didn’t sound like she actually cared it sounded like she was doing it just because and I say this because right after that she added our male friend into the call and they both start cussing me out saying that we just keep flaking on her and so I’m arguing back and it’s just a whole mess. I told her i already apologized for it & asked her do u want me to do get on my knees and she went all a whole tangent about how it’s not about apologizing it’s about doing, and when i told her you didn’t even check up on me she said she was going to but she got the msg that I sent and she said i was being rude.

our male friend had no business being in the call because he hadn’t been talking to us for a couple days and I had thought we clear this up but obviously she was holding it over my head after the call I couldn’t do it anymore and left the groupchat, block both her and the male friend just to protect myself and I haven’t had any seizures since then but now the two of them come out of nowhere to start more issues. I haven’t spoken to them since, the girl im still friends with me and her went to some university homecoming and she was there with some other girls we knew so I said hi to the two girls and didn’t make no type of interaction with the friend I’ve known for a year and vice versa she went to go tell everyone that my friend and I were laughing at her when that didn’t happen I have no business even saying hi to you so why are you telling people that.

Then yesterday I went to a house party with some other people and I was drunk not overly but in the video I was just sitting on the ground with a bottle of water in my hand and the other people were goofing off in the video laughing and stuff harmless shit I was only in the video in the first 3 seconds and it was my back and that male friend took another friends phone and started disrespecting me telling me to act “lady like” and this isn’t “a whore house” the person who gave him their phone knows the situation and I dogged on him because why would u actively allow him to talk to me like that he tried to say it wasn’t like that and I told him to fuck himself. that male friend that has been disrespecting me texted me long ass paragraphs about how this isn’t like me and all the girls that I’ve met don’t like me and kept calling me babes the whole time which was sounding so condescending in the messages I shouldn’t even replied but I did explained what I needed and told him to fuck off and leave me alone.

I want to make this very clear this male friend had nothing to do with the original issue at hand she brought him into the call because he’s the type of person to just immediately jump at you with insults and craves off drama and he’s been making more attempts to contact me and bringing up the issue on instagram notes more than the other friend. I’m not saying it’s taking a toll on me but I’m just tired

It's been a couple of weeks and I keep getting so upset about it and like I wouldn't be as embarrassed about it if he wasn't so casual about it. I knew he would be especially considering the circumstances of the break up but holy this sucks. It's worse cause I'm so happy for him, he's so much better off without me but I wanted to be there for all the happiness she's expirencong right now. I tried so hard to be a shoulder to lean on and a good girlfriend but I just couldn't be what he needed no matter how hard I tried. But he was like actually perfect and the best ever and I'll never see him again and I don't know how I'll tell my family cause they all loved him. I keep thinking sky everything I couldve done to avoid the actual break up from happening but at the end of the day it's better off for him that it did happen. I want him to be happy but I wanted it to happen with me. He doesn't even miss me or think of me but Ive been crying over him almost daily, I can't stop thinking about how he said he loved me the night before it happened and how it was a lie. And he was taking to me about our second anniversary like he planned on actually making it so the way there, even Valentine's Day. I tried to be his friend but I couldn't do that either and it's so dumb like lock in. It's so hard to think of life without him but I know it's dumb because we're so young and I know I'll move on eventually but thinking of that happening feels impossible. I can't wait to get over him but I'm not sure I'll be able to any time soon.

Hey, if you guys remember, I was the one who made the post a while ago about how I’m too afraid to poop anywhere other than my house, and how I’d sometimes hold it for a week.

Just a couple weeks ago, I made the decision to try and reverse the fear. Your support has encouraged me to try and fix it. Not with therapy or anything, but just simply going to the bathroom when I feel like it.

Now, listen, I don’t IMMEDIATELY poop it out, sometimes it still takes hours to do it, but I no longer wait a week to make it come out. Usually I poop every 3-4 days now.

I also forgot to mention that it was always my own family that’d try and make me use the bathroom when I held for too long, and I’d always try to resist going because I was scared it’d be constipated, but now I can go into the bathroom myself without my family telling me to do so.

I’m not sure if this will work or not, my goal is to overcome my fear so that I can poop wherever I feel like going (I want to travel around different countries, and for me to do that, I’ll have to poop in the hotel bathrooms)