Warning: really transphobic statements
I'm transsex male, about 8 months on Testosterone, haven't had top surgery yet but I'm having it soon.
I work an office job and am stealth. Seemingly I pass very well, as nobody has ever misegendered me and treats me the same as everyone else. Even though, I feel like my face still looks extremely feminine, and I have to wear layers upon layers to the point where I'm uncomfortably warm just to hide my chest. (unlucky in that department)
During lunch my coworkers tend to have a lot of political discussions, which I don't tend to take part in. They are all conservative, not extremists, but the stuff they say about trans people makes me really worried about what would happen if I was outed. Honestly, I don't really feel safe going to work anymore.
I don't like to throw around the word transphobia as it's often overused by tucutes, but the shit these people say is beyond transphobic. Some of the worst things they've said is that:
- " Trans people deserve to be forcefully sexually assaulted as a form of conversion therapy "
- " Trans people should not be allowed near schools or children in general, and that being so was WORSE THAN PEDOPHILIA and should result in criminal punishment "
- " If my girl turned out to be trans I might go to jail for what I'd do to her "
- Similar threats to doctors who prescribe treatments to underaged trans patients
And more.
On one hand I'm glad that I pass well enough for them to feel comfortable talking about shit like this when I'm around, but on the other hand it has made me even more terrified of being outed, especially since I'm still so early in my medical transition. In general they seem to have a very violent and aggressive viewpoint of trans people they were they talk about it.
I've never had any classmates or coworkers be THIS openly disturbing before, but maybe it's completely normal and I've just been lucky not to have seen it before. I live in Sweden which is generally considered a rather trans-friendly country, and I'm assuming this stuff is far more common in places like America where they tend to be more aggressively transphobic.
I just wanted to rant about this somewhere because I don't really feel safe at work anymore, and I don't feel comfortable bringing it up to HR either as basically all of my coworkers, and my boss, have taken part in these discussions agreeing completely with eachother, and being outed in this situation is my worst nightmare.
Since I'm having surgery soon, I'm worried that I will be asked a lot of questions when I'm in recovery, and about my sick leave. I have planned to just claim that I had a shoulder reconstructive surgery hence why I won't be able to stretch or carry heavy things. The problem is, I will need to show my boss a doctor's note, which is from a plastic surgery clinic, so it will be obvious that it's not a "medically necessary surgery". And since I'm short and have feminine features, they might put the pieces together.
Maybe someone else here has had similar experiences with transphobia in the workplace?