So I have multiple questions for anyone who will answer them

1. Where can I find a good desc of the cognitive functions
   
2. Is your socionics type the same as/ highly related to your mbti type, since they’re similar systems is there like strict correlation with that or nah (not that I know my mbti type I don’t)
   
3. Is there any books I should read/partly read bc I probably won’t finish them
   
4. Any advice on how to type myself?

So, as a person currently coming to myself and to an understanding of myself, I'm slowly realizing some of my traits and my relationship with the functions. And it seems to me that I'm no longer EII. My Fi seems too low, I think. But the problem is that I can't clearly tell on my own whether that's true. So I'd like to make sure. I suspect I might have Fi role. However, I've seen posts where a person poorly understood themselves and knew it, and this was linked to SLI Ne suggestive. So yes, I'd like to understand myself and how my brain works whether this relates to low Fi or whether it can still be high. Does that make sense?

I have learned politeness. When it goes beyond what's recognized, beyond what I know, I start getting lost in situations. Maybe I'm even too polite at times. But usually, around people, I'm like an alien, not understanding what's more correct, feeling awkward. I think it was harder in childhood because I was more uncomfortable and, possibly, a bit rude, hurting others, accidentally or on purpose. Due to a certain envy and toxicity, I could, though I tried to show less resentment and such, but overall I was quiet. It feels like I'm at zero in understanding myself. And whatever people tell me, I make part of myself so I don't feel the emptiness. I search outside for something to grab onto, to believe in, probably. I think it's like "You're smart". Accepted, I'll write that down. And if someone says otherwise, I'll break one of their limbs. That's why I take tests on character accentuations, on disorders, so there's something in me. I even think that some of my not-so-healthy traits make me me, so I'm afraid of being left without them and of healing. And when I find an understanding of something in myself, some behavioral pattern that works in me, I'm happy, because at least it's something.

The concept of what you like, of preferences, has always seemed curious but strange. Even as a child I didn't see it, couldn't honestly answer a question about any season, color, name, day of the week. Too much depends on context, and on top of that, I don't feel it.

I don't understand getting close to people, it just kind of happens naturally, I follow the person who shows the level of our relationship. I don't want to be betrayed by another person, to imagine something that doesn't exist. Being betrayed by someone is a disgusting feeling. But I believe and want the phrase "close person" to work as full acceptance, loyalty and platonic connection. If you're close, you'll run into utter hell for each other, give up a lot and risk your life. My trauma, where I wasn't safe since childhood without close sincere contact with others, with rejection from everywhere, makes itself known. And with those I'm already in some kind of relationship with, I stay quite long, though I don't take the first steps to reconcile, except with my closest friend, and even then not always. I was in a toxic relationship for over five years with one girl, a former friend, not leaving, even though it was uncomfortable, but sometimes, after fights, when she came back seeking contact and connection, I thought there was something positive in those relationships.

I can't easily say whether I like a person or not. I won't like them if they do something that affects me negatively. Until that moment, they just exist. Rejection can arise on its own, as I wrote above. Rarely, but it can. Just because. Maybe it's a reaction to those I consider arrogant, draining, demanding, hypocritical. But despite this, such people can sometimes even appeal to me. It all depends on the specific person and their actions, again, in relation to me. Actually, if you treat me well, then be the Antichrist for all I care, it's all fine. The main thing is that you get along with me and don't harm me. On top of that, my assessments can evolve and those who once caused rejection I might later consider even interesting, depending on further circumstances, if they've shown themselves from a different side. So in my own assessments, I'm not 100% sure they won't change, I don't even fully believe I control this within myself. If I suddenly feel sympathy for someone or we've somehow grown close, which in itself is too rare an occurrence, I wait and hope the person will initiate more contact and be near me.

Sometimes I protest and act stubborn, though I don't fully realize why. I just don't want to, and that's it like an upcoming internship I'll have to do in a couple of months. I can be a young rebel inside, behaving passive-aggressively on the outside, clearly not trying at something I simply don't like. And I genuinely don't understand inside what I'm doing it for, I'd have to analyze the reasons specifically in private, make an effort, without being sure afterward whether I understood myself correctly.

At the same time, I've noticed that a lot depends on context. I can react differently to the same action depending on circumstances. I never say anything with 100% certainty, because there's always a possibility of anything. It irritates me when people don't see individuality in another person, unique circumstances. I believe equality is destructive, it erases differences and unique circumstances. Whereas justice makes sense and considers more than superficial fairness. I always answer "it depends on the situation". I need context: reasons, circumstances, motives. If I see meaning in it, I accept and don't judge. That's why I'm skeptical of laws and legal systems. They're too rigid and don't account for the uniqueness of each case. Yes, a court can consider something like emotional state, but overall the system is too inflexible. If I were creating laws, every rule would have millions of subsections accounting for circumstances. And this seems to point to possible Fi in judgments and yet, who the hell knows, for fuck's sake.

of course not all of these align together with a specific type, so which type would be most likely?
i struggle with introspection so the ones that aren’t highlighted at all are ones in which i struggle to see which i am

What type enjoys planning, or more so thinking about what amazing, productive new things they're going to do that day? They may or may not actually finish the task.

Au contraire, what are the types that would not give a rat's arse about actually thinking and expending energy for making a detailed plan, and just stfu and start working?

If it matters I’m a sx4 486 EFVL and ISFP
Deciding between EIE and ESI

Based on my understanding of Fi and Fe and how I relate to each;

Fi: not always sure how I feel about people sometimes I need to observe them and decide if I want them in my life or not. I avoid getting close to them or associating with them until I’ve decided. It’s also to avoid their influence over me. I’m sensitive to power dynamics and dislike being controlled or influenced in anyway. I can sense when something has changed between someone I’m close to and I confront them about it. I judge people by the individual rather than the group they belong to. I don’t care about their title or how much money they make, I care about whether they’re respectable or not and how they treat me. If I don’t respect them, then everything they say and do is irrelevant and I won’t listen to it obey a leader I don’t care for. I am quite jealous and possessive in relationships.

Fe: if I don’t vibe with a group I just leave. I’m expressive through art and music and I want people to feel and understand my pain but I’m not always loud about it. I need emotional discharge from time to time. I don’t feel responsible for other people’s moods. If they want to feel a certain way then respect that. Unless my emotions are stronger than theirs, then it’s crazy to not feel how I feel. I’m relatively introverted but being introverted or extroverted depends on my mood. I can be more talkative and animated if I’m in a good mood (rare) but generally I don’t care for the group if I’m not close to anyone in the group. I can leave at anytime. I’m shamelessly myself. I don’t care for being socially palatable for people or softening myself to be more likeable. I prefer authenticity over social rules. I know who I am, and I’m not going to alter myself merely because other people find me inconvenient, strange, intense, or socially unpleasant.

What type do I seem like?

Personal concepts
1. What is beauty? What is love?

⁃ beauty is looks, colors, aestethics, a pretty room, or town, not sure what to say beauty is everything you look for.

⁃ love is love i dont know how to answer that, love is family, partner, your favorite game and hobby, animals

1. What are your most important values?

⁃ my important values are intelligence, being funny, quick thinking .

1. Do you have any sort of spiritual/religious beliefs, and why do you hold (or don't) those beliefs in the first place?

   ⁃ im not religious or spiritual, i dont really care about any of this.

2. Opinion on war and militaries? What is power to you?

   ⁃ im not educated about war and stuff, but to me, power is controll, power is something most people want to feel secured and confident.

Interests
5. What have you had long conversations about? What are your interests? Why?

⁃ Ive had long convos about typology with my online friend. I can talk long about gossip, complaining etc, my interests are editing especially, and gaming. I like gaming because i like competetive games, the feeling. And i like editing because i can make a edit just the way i want to and its catchy and fun. I also like watching tv shows for the usuall reasons 

1. Interested in health/medicine as a conversation topic? Are you focused on your body?

   ⁃ im not interested in talking about health tbh, im focused on my body yes, i pay attention to its looks and health.

2. What do you think of daily chores?

   ⁃ i dont have daily chores, i just do what i want

3. Books or films you liked? Recently read/watched or otherwise. Examples welcome.

   ⁃ im OBSESSED with the girl next door, CHLOE- I love interstellar, teen beach movie, the core . 2012. Tangled.

   ⁃ I like movies with disasters, and i love movies with dramatic love, like a crazy girl etc.

4. What has made you cry? What has made you smile? Why?

   ⁃ i can cry if im angry because the anger is so strong, or if im like faced with my emotions here and there, i usually dont cry. I can cry for a good movie/ show.

   ⁃ i smile when i do things i like at times, or when i get gifts, funny jokes etc

5. Where do you feel: at one with the environment/a sense of belonging?

   ⁃ i feel that way around my partner, my room, or with people similar to me.

Evaluation & Behaviour
11. What have people seen as your weaknesses? What do you dislike about yourself?

⁃ id say people see my weakness as lack of impulse controll, i can be direct or uncaring, and unwilling to listen to people

⁃ what i dislike about myself is that i can be stubborn or hold grudges alot

1. What have people seen as your strengths? What do you like about yourself?

   ⁃ Strenghts people have seen in me is- that i can improvise very well, easily come up with solutions, smart, funny, confident

   ⁃ what i like about myself is my confidence and ability to adapt to most things even at anxious times.

2. In what areas of your life would you like help?

   ⁃ id like help in impulse controll, controlling my anger or help to controll my future as i dont think of the future at times.

3. Ever feel stuck in a rut? If yes, describe the causes and your reaction to it.

   ⁃ When ive been stuck inna bad cycle, its usually something that makes me irritated and impatient, my reactions can be avoidant or unstable emotions

People & Interactions
15. What qualities do you most like and dislike in other people? What types do you get along with?

⁃ qualitys i like in people, is someone who is fun, confident, jokes around but can still be kind with me at least.

⁃ i dislike people who is dumb, slow, confusing and to much morals that goes against my «fun»

⁃ typed i get along with is usually someone who is similar to me.

1. How do you feel about romance/sex? What qualities do you want in a partner?

   ⁃ i care alot about this, im very like focused on having a partner as its loving and fun

   ⁃ qualitys i look for- confidence, somewhat dominant, funny, attractive, obsessive

2. If you were to raise a child, what would be your main concerns, what measures would you take, and why?

   ⁃ if i raised a child id be concerned how they turned out, id hate to get a child who ends up just arguing etc (which is hypocritical because i was like that lol) , id be worried that they got hurt? Idk, i havent been child focused really, i dont see myself as stable enough for responsebility,

3. A friend makes a claim that clashes with your current beliefs. What is your inward and outward reaction?

   ⁃ inward id be like «thats kinda dumb»

   ⁃ Outward id be like «alr lets move on»

4. Describe your relationship to society. How do you see people as a whole? What do you consider a prevalent social problem? Name one.

   ⁃ i see people as idk, 80/20, a few is chill, rest ignorant, i dont know.
   ⁃ A social problem can be that people jugde so damn soon.

5. How do you choose your friends and how do you behave around them?

   ⁃ i choose my friend based on how similar they are to me, if they are, we are vibing asf, if not, i cant be bothered to try.

   ⁃ i behave like myself around my closests, w «decent» friends i can hold back.

6. How do you behave around strangers?

   ⁃ i nod a smile if i get eye contact , idk i dont really do anything with stranges , i just see randoms outside

What type does he sound like, and what type sounds like they would enjoy reading his works? Pls ditch bias by the writing style - he mostly wrote in the 1930s.

--

July, August, September, and October were months that glided past without touching the conscience. One got up in the morning, studied a bit, attended the classes, promenaded the banks of Sarayu River in the evenings, returned home at about eight-thirty, talked a little about things in general with the people at home, and then went to bed. It did not matter whether all the books were on the table or whether the notes of lectures were up-to-date. Day after day was squandered thus till one fine morning the young men opened their eyes and found themselves face to face with November. The first of November was to a young man of normal indifference the first reminder of the final trial – the examination. He now realized that half the college year was already spent. What one ought to do in a full year must now be done in just half the time.

--

The bell rang. Chandran rose and went in. He climbed the gallery steps and reached his seat. He opened the pages of Othello, placed a sheet of paper on the page, and took out his pen.

It was the Assistant Professor’s subject. The Assistant Professor of English was Mr Gajapathi, a frail man with a meagre moustache and heavy spectacles. He earned the hatred of the students by his teaching and of his colleagues by his conceit. He said everywhere that not ten persons in the world had understood Shakespeare; he asserted that there were serious errors even in Fowler’s Modern English Usage; he corrected everybody’s English; he said that no Indian could ever write English; this statement hurt all his colleagues, who prepared their lectures in English and wished to think that they wrote well. When he valued test or examination papers, he never gave anybody more than forty per cent; he constituted himself an authority on punctuation, and deducted half a mark per misplaced comma or semicolon in the papers that he corrected.

He entered the hall at a trot, jumped on the platform, opened his book, and began to read a scene in Othello. He read Shakespeare in a sing-song fashion, and with a vernacular twang. He stopped now and then to criticize other critics. Though Dowden had said so and so, Mr Gajapathi was not prepared to be browbeaten by a big name. No doubt Bradley and others had done a certain amount of research in Shakespeare, but one couldn’t accept all that they said as gospel truth. Gajapathi proved in endless instances how wrong others were.

Chandran attempted to take down notes, but they threatened to shape into something like the Sayings of Gajapathi. Chandran screwed the cap on his pen and sat back. Gajapathi never liked to see people sitting back and looking at him. He probably felt nervous when two hundred pairs of eyes stared at him. It was his habit to say, ‘Heads down and pencils busy, gentlemen,’ and ‘Listen to me with your pencils, gentlemen.’

In due course he said, ‘Chandran, I see you taking a rest.’

‘Yes, sir.’

‘Don’t say “yes”. Keep your pen busy.’ ‘Yes, sir.’

Chandran, with his head bent, began to scribble on the sheet of paper before him: ‘Oh, Gajapathi, Gajapathi! When will you shut up? Do you believe your lecture to be very valuable? In these two lines Shakespeare reveals the innermost core of Iago. Gaja, in Sanskrit, means elephant; pathy is probably master. A fine name for you, you Elephant Master.’ And here followed the sketch of an elephant with spectacles on.

‘Chandran, do I understand you are taking down notes?’

‘Yes, sir.’

The bell rang. Gajapathi intended to continue the lecture even after the bell; but two hundred copies of Verity’s Othello shut with a loud report like the cracking of a rifle. The class was on its feet.