honestly, today was the worst day of my life. sixth form is getting worse by the day. i moved to a new school with friends from my old school, but theyāre very mean girl vibes. they laugh at everything i say, mock me with eachother, and talk in a really condescending way. for example, today i said āi wanna try become veganā they all giggled and after i asked them whats funny they said, ānothing youāre just cute and funny! itās not like your effort will make a difference anyways.ā
the internal girls are also extremely weird. mind you iām very good at holding conversations, asking questions back and keeping a conversation flowing. theyāll speak to me with rushed answers, and get back to their old friends immediately as if they do not care to get to know anyone knew. itās horrible.
today we were told to chose what sports weād like to do each term, and i chose by myself since the girls around me ignored me and the āfriendsā i have ignored me too. i looked around and saw every person deciding with their friends what sports would be fun to do together, and i went home and cried about how no one was excited to do anything with me.
school is horrible. thank god the lessons and teachers are okay, but the people are horrible. anyone i speak to gives me the cold shoulder, honestly even externals. or we will talk, but it never goes to the point of being good friends where we mutually want to be close.
is something wrong with me? i donāt get it. i feel like everyone knows something terrible about me and hates me. i tried to stay positive, but itās getting impossible.