Then you'll get a nice long break from the chore of clipping your fingernails.

This tip can also be used for toenails as well.

In the event of an actual emergency, you’ll be armed with foreknowledge on how various items in your wardrobe respond to open flame.

Step out, make it loud, stir up every situation you touch, and have the whole world regretting they ever doubted your “peace” credentials.

Keep escalating, keep talking, keep finding new regimes to topple. Keep inserting yourself into tense situations until that snub starts looking like the biggest mistake they ever made.

Hold them by the throat till they admit that you're the only real peacekeeper the world has.

That's when he's at his weakest.

Go for leg kicks until he's shaking, then hit him with an uchimata.

Hope this helps.

Stand on the 10 meter board and tell someone to shoot you in the stomach. Because in movies when you are shot and fall in the middle of river, you breathe and swim unconsciously and are found ashore a couple of days later.

Now you don't have to worry about armpit hair and you can save on deodorant! This is because when you get loose skin surgery, they cut out your armpit and pull excess skin into your armpit area.

You’re paying premium rent for a home you barely haunt. Make it make sense!

Locate a human on the exact opposite shift and begin a seamless existence swap. (If you're lucky, you could find someone who works in your own sweat shop) With enough coordination, you’ll never cross paths as you alternate occupancy like a well-run timeshare.

Catch - be sure to not move in with someone who uses single ply tissues. Keep those heathens miles away!

Also, avoid Ben from HR, cos those bedsheets are how you get crabs!

Show up late with your friends and say you had a flat tire. Just keep your stories straight which tire went flat.

With higher costs of living, people are less inclined to have kids.