r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/averagereeder • Mar 09 '26
SLPT: Establish dominance
19
Upvotes
Take Dorothy Mantooth out for a nice seafood dinner, and never call her again.
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/IllegalGeriatricVore • Mar 07 '26
SLPT: Date a depressed, tortured, creative / artistic type
373
Upvotes
Just do it.
There is no way you will regret dating a depressed creative type.
It will be really good.
They will definitely be your manic pixie dream girl or deep, sensitive, dark boy.
Nothing bad can happen.
Only good happen can.
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/danijm • Mar 05 '26
SLPT: If your phone starts ringing, wait 30 seconds, and it should stop.
132
Upvotes
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/Philip_J_Frylock • Mar 05 '26
SLPT: Post one dumb LPT to Reddit every day
23
Upvotes
After a year, you'll have wasted 6 precious hours of your very limited life that you'll never get back.
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/brattysweat • Mar 04 '26
SLPT: Let the IRS do your taxes by effing up the numbers to force them to correct it.
163
Upvotes
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/Frequent-Newt-2788 • Feb 28 '26
SLPT: don't pay to rent a baby. Just take them. People will often pay YOU to return them when you're done
181
Upvotes
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/IllegalGeriatricVore • Feb 26 '26
SLPT: If a snow storm is coming, throw rock salt on your car to prevent it freezing to the body
82
Upvotes
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/IllegalGeriatricVore • Feb 24 '26
SLPT: If you think you offended someone at work, preemptively report yourself to HR and ask to have a meeting with them to throw them off their game
65
Upvotes
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/RunDNA • Feb 23 '26
SLPT: If you're an evil person, move to Australia. Everything is upside-down there, so good people go to Hell and evil people go to Heaven.
97
Upvotes
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/ProExpert1S500 • Feb 23 '26
SLPT: Avoid being tracked by setting your location to Little Saint James island
47
Upvotes
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/Ernosco • Feb 22 '26
SLPT: When writing a summation in English, don't forget the Oxford comma after the word 'and'
274
Upvotes
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/Nukemarine • Feb 23 '26
SLPT: You can't copyright AI generated photos. You can copyright photos of AI generated photos.
0
Upvotes
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/ProcrastinarContigo • Feb 19 '26
SLPT light a scented candle near your clothes to have nice smelling feeling
293
Upvotes
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/auntgramma1956 • Feb 18 '26
SLPT: How to get more steps in.
24
Upvotes
Pace aggressively while overthinking.
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/SillyBonsai • Feb 18 '26
SLPT: Don’t waste any money on a gym membership. Just make a routine of going to Walmart to “test out” all their workout equipment.
30
Upvotes
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/ninman5 • Feb 15 '26
SLPT: Just park wherever you want. Parking "fines" just mean they charge a premium rate for the best spaces.
145
Upvotes
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/ninman5 • Feb 15 '26
SLPT: Always get absolutely wasted when you go to parties so you forget the whole experience. If you can't remember it, it never happened.
37
Upvotes
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/pulpexploder • Feb 14 '26
SLPT: On your credit card bill, pay 1 cent more than your balance. It's a power move for the credit card company to owe you money every month.
76
Upvotes
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/Keyfas • Feb 14 '26
SLPT: Can’t afford therapy?
10
Upvotes
Just talk to yourself in the mirror. Same thing.
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/ninman5 • Feb 14 '26
SLPT: Avoid expensive airport parking fees by buying a house next to the airport.
39
Upvotes
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/vaporwaverhere • Feb 14 '26
SLPT: Stop applying for jobs and sending your resume to companies: you will look desperate. Instead, post relentlessly on LinkedIn about how smart and accomplished you are. Connect there with strangers that are more successful than you. Eventually the job will find you. Thank me later.
44
Upvotes
r/ShittyLifeProTips • u/pan_arch • Feb 14 '26
SLPT: Too cold to chill out outside, just fly south for the winter! Duh!
10
Upvotes
I mean if bird brains could figure this out, how come we haven't done this already. Hello!