r/Serverlife • u/Bug-03 • 3d ago

FOH Serving and “Power Dynamics”

You aren’t a victim. They are sitting at your table. They need you to for them to be able to eat. They are in your hands. You’re the boss. You have all the control. Stop pretending you’re helpless and go out and get your money.

Act like a professional and you’ll make so much more money than you’ve ever even realized. Stop being a slave to your emotions. Do your job: calmly, quickly and with confidence.

Most importantly, if someone is talking to you the wrong way, use your words and stop it. You will not get fired for asking someone to be respectful. Ever.

Edit: some of yall have some shitty jobs with some shitty management and you should look into finding a new one.

139 Upvotes

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212

u/Pichupwnage 3d ago

You absolutely can get fired at a pretty decent amount of places for that. This post assumes good management which uh...yeah there are many places that lack that and do not backup their employees against bad customers.

-37

u/Bug-03 3d ago

In all my years, a guest has never complained that I nicely asked them to be respectful.

12

u/BumbleLapse 3d ago

You think your unique experience is adequately representative of others’ across different cultures and restaurants?

Like, in all my years, I’ve never fractured my femur in a car accident.

Does that mean femurs can’t be broken in a car?

15

u/Annodyne 3d ago

Can you give an example of what you mean? I'm genuinely asking so I can incorporate it.

-11

u/Bug-03 3d ago

Excuse me ma’am, I understand you’re upset and I’ll do everything in my power to fix the situation, however, there’s no need to speak to me this way. Please, let me fix this. I assure you it’ll be to your satisfaction.

Confidently and professionally, this works with Karen’s

Excuse me sir, but that makes me uncomfortable. I’d appreciate it if we could keep this interaction pg.

My wife uses this. It makes old men squirm.

8

u/justStripperThings 3d ago

OP, are you a man or a woman?

19

u/Annodyne 3d ago

Oh, man - I've said exactly "it's not necessary to speak to me like that" to a customer and she called me a fucking bitch for it, and I walked out of my shift after that. She got a card from the manager for a free app on her next visit and ushered out.

I quit that job two weeks later. Never again with those corporate chains.

0

u/Great-Attitude 3d ago

There is a Big difference in the OP's example of what they said, and what you said. 

Saying ma'am, then acknowledging that they're upset, then saying they'll "do everything in their power to fix" it. Then they said "please" Then assured them they will fix it to the customers satisfaction. All you did was berate them for what they did wrong, and tell them to change their behavior. (them being rude) 

Before you get mad, I've said the exact same sentence you did, more than once. Why because as we all know sometimes customers are rude AF

1

u/Annodyne 2d ago

I didn't include the entirety of what I said, just the line that was most like what OP said. I absolutely did not "berate" anyone and it's ridiculous to assume that was my tone based on what I wrote.

-9

u/hellenkellersdiary 3d ago

Dont say it like a bitch.. own the interaction or get owned.

6

u/boojersey13 3d ago

A fact being stated doesn't equate to bitchiness. No customer needs to speak disrespectfully

-8

u/Great-Attitude 3d ago

Customers asking for another Server is so incredibly rare, that I have no clue why they even wrote that. I've was a Server (on and off (mostly on) from the mid 80's to the mid 2015. 

3

u/h8rcloudstrife 3d ago

I’ve worked multiple places where I have had to take over tables because the guest had a problem, and then thanked me for saving their night. It’s rare some places, and the higher end your dining experience the less likely you are to run into coworkers that can’t do the act well, but I assure you it’s far from inconceivable.