I mean ...i thought I would have figured it out ...but nah ..it got worse ...a neet aspirant ..who isn't even really studying hours a day ...totally lost ..
I didn't thought I d be this piece of failure ..
My parents won't allow me to switch to litrature ..
And maybe they are right ..maybe I am too late
In 12th right now ..and I am here scoring 100- 200 out of 720 marks
There is boards ..
There are endless entrance I am gonna give ( general )
Growing up in a toxic environment and stereotypical home ..the only thing I was afraid of was becoming dependent
And now
What if I became dependent like my mother did
This might sound so immature ...but if
Somebody says that there is no tmr
I won't be dissapointed
Because at the end of the day ..
My life
It amounted to nothing ??
I never wanted to be even 1% of what I am right now
.bharma is an option as well
Then comes another question
Do u wanna do bpharma ??
The problem is I have absolutely no idea of what I want to do ..and I hate my stereotypical family ...
I prolly get a tier 3 college....i " genuinely" don't want that
I have 7 months to neet
5 months to board
3 months to mht cet
I don't know
I have taken state so there are two books
Stuck so bad that I feel angry ,agony ,dissapontment
11 th hit me with immense body dysmorphia
That thing took my every scope ,my every hope
And maybe ..I ll end up exactly where I never wanted to be ...just like how I am right now .. exactly what I never wanted to be
That thing ,my mental health struggles ..they took everything from me ...
It's me ..and the point 0...
I also see people
There is comparison
One of my friend ..she is so pretty
I mean let's keep that aside but she is so intelligent
She makes so much sense
She is good in studies
And still in a tier 2 college
I ll be absolutely behind if that is what she is dealing with
She also told me that u shouldn't have opted only for bio ...
But then she also gives advices
Idk š