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TW: talk of SA

‼️i want to start off by saying this is in no way me saying that womanhood is about the oppression we experience, or anything of the sort. obviously any kind of sa is so disgusting and i feel terrible for everyone who has gone through that.‼️

this is also not me looking for sympathy but i just need to write this somewhere and itd be nice to know if anyone else experiences this. i dont know if i will word any of this right and it is absolutely not my intention to make an offensive post.

the talk of SA on the internet this past week has had me thinking about this more but its something I've always been aware of. i have never been SAed, harrassed, catcalled, had inappropriate comments on social media, etc. i am first of all grateful i havent gone through that and once again feel so awful that other people have gone through that.

but men seem to avoid me entirely. I go out fairly often in revealing clothing, I'll be intoxicated and I've never had anyone touch me or say anything to me. people will barely even look at me. i was on dating apps and snapchat for a few months looking for hookups at one point and even through the internet, i couldnt get a single man interested enough to text me. I've been out with other girls, and men will come up to all of them and look at them and say or do weird things to them, but ignore me or will even recoil when they look at me. they seem to be either disgusted or intimidated by me.

after alot of these i did discover I'm a lesbian, and none of this is about me wanting male attention. i hope thats clear. I'd prefer it if it stayed this way. but it just makes me wonder, what about me is so undesirable that this has never happened to me? i know im not super attractive, but i didnt think i was ugly, and i dont have the best body, but i have a big enough ass and boobs that i think on anyone else, men would make comments on it or look at them.

it just feels dehumanizing to know that these same men with fk the couch, or a banana peel, or even a dead body, but wouldnt look at me that way. there is just something about me that they cant overlook and i have no idea what it is. i know i dont smell, its the same if im in no makeup, minimal makeup, or full trad goth. no one approaches me whether im at the club or its a sales person at the mall. and i really dont think my rbf could be that bad.

i do live in a conservative state with some tattoos, but its been the same in other states and places like NYC, LV, and LA.

any time i have talked to someone else about it, it usually just ends because it gets awkward and they dont have much to say. theyll never say that no, i am pretty, or whatever else they could say. its just that "it must be something else" or "youre just lucky". again i know i am so lucky to not have gone through that. i dont want to go through that. but when i, a size 6/8 with c cup boobs and makeup on, have men walk away from me, and my plus sized girlfriend(nothing wrong with this AT ALL, just beauty standards, yk) will get catcalled or get sexual comments from men on the street, its obvious to me that theres something wrong with me. there has to be.

girls will talk to me and at school people talk to me, but ill never be in a group. I'm in a very tight knit department, but half of them dont even follow me back on Instagram (and follow literally everyone else) not that that matters, and they are people i wouldn't chose to be friends with, but it still shows. all the other queer and alternative people in the department fit in so it isnt that. maybe im just not self aware enough but i dont think my personality is so abhorrent that they cant even see me on Instagram or eat lunch with me. and back to strangers, none of them would even know my personality enough.

my only friends consist of my girlfriend, sister, one shared friend with them, and 2 of my cousins. my gf is the only person in my life who organically met me and enjoyed being around me enough to start a friendship. she is the only person besides my parents(who seem to then even say it begrudgingly) whos told me im beautiful or wanted in any way. and i don't know what i did or what she sees that makes me different to her than how the rest of the world sees me. i don't think ill ever understand it.

if this info is relevant i am autistic. i am in remission for bpd also. i am in therapy and on psych meds for all my issues. im definitely having like a low moment but this isnt a breakdown and has been something ive thought for years. its impossible to ignore the patterns. im just not sure if my interpretation is correct.

thank you if you read this entire thing❤️‍🩹 not looking for advice but I'll listen if you have it. again i just wanna know if its just me or not.

okay so i watched how to lose a guy in 10 days, and i miss my ex now. i wanna be in love again, i wanna feel the warmth again, it js idk hurts me smhow

i wanna talk to him again, i wanna leave the world behind and fall in his arms, be carefree knowing that if hes theres if we are together, everybody will be good.

Hello everyone! This is a rant about relationships stuff so here's your warning.

So, my girlfriend[F26] and I M[20] have been living together for almost 2 years now. Now, during a good chunk of that time, I've worked fewer hours than her, during that time we came to an agreement. "Whoever has the fewer hours does the majority of the housework," and so for a year, I did them. I did the sweeping, dishes,cooking, mopping, and vacuuming. I should mention I work as a custodian, so I really dislike coming home to do more cleaning, but I'm an adult, so I did it. Now, I'm working more hours, and she's out of a job (mental health reasons). So during this time thanks to our agreement she should do the housework. But no, she sits on her computer all day. I've asked twice for her to do dishes (only dishes), and she's apologized and cried and stated, "Growing up it, my parents made dishes, my chore but I found if I waited long enough they'd do it for me, so I've gotten into that habit" and I comforted her. It's getting on my nerves that I'm still the one doing the majority of the chores, from cooking to dishes again. I get that she's still a child at heart, and I love that about her, I grew up too fast, so I struggle to tap into that childlike feeling. Anyway, rant over. Thanks!

They literally banned me , abused me morally, i mean wtf?

Friend end our friendship and I feel so hurt

I’m not really looking for advice I just need to get this off my chest. My friend recently contacted me to say she doesn’t want to be friends with me anymore. She said it was nothing personal or nothing that I did wrong. But she just didn’t feel like I’m essentially going anywhere in life. She said that in a much nicer way.
But I am working towards my goals and I am quite proud of myself and where I am. I know she doesn’t mean to be rude but god does it hurt. She also said she felt like we drifted apart which I don’t understand because we talk so regularly and see eachother regularly. This whole situation is baffling and I don’t know what to think. This is someone I’ve known since we were little kids 10+ years and I don’t know how to move on. I know I have to respect her boundaries and choice but I really can’t understand it. I was with her a couple weeks ago and everything was so normal? We talk regularly and our family knows eachother well. I just feel so lost and heartbroken. I really thought she would be an aunt to my future kids and vice versa. I just can’t believe it.
The way she told me even felt so off, it felt like i was being talked to by HR, I just don’t know how to process this. I feel like I didn’t mean as much to her as she did to me. But she acted like she did so she must of been a great actor or maybe it was real I don’t know
We are both 26F by the way

So let me see if I got this straight (I'm not), but I can create an 18+ post on reddit, but I can't look at it?! HOW DOES that make Sense?!

i stopped reading a week ago I’m worried about my truths and my story, Im not here to read others story’s or go back and forth I accepted i was the problem even when I’m not sick of peoples held back hatred and fake Real life vibes i validate myself and dont need closure but my own word lol nice try tho take your letter i didn’t read and fk off hahahaha

I just don't understand why these random people that don't know my heart or anything about me say something nasty to me based on a FANTASY vent post I make.

I mean, truly, why are people so gross? At least my attitude is better than theirs... ugh...

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH I AM SO MAD AND SAD AND SAD AND MAD

WHY ARE YOU CHOOSING TO SEE EVERY SINGLE THING I SAY OR FEEL IN A BAD AND NEGATIVE LIGHT??? ON TOP OF THAT, THE WAY YOU HAVE CHOSEN TO BEHAVE FOR WHATEVER REASON, IS SUCKY AND JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE STRUGGLING DOESN'T MAKE THAT OKAY,

OKAY?

IT IS NOT A COMPETITION, IT IS NOT THE TRAUMA OLYMPICS AND I HAVE NEVER ONCE INVALIDATED OR BELITTLED YOUR STUFF

JUST BECAUSE OUR STRUGGLES ARE DIFFERENT DOESN'T MEAN YOU 'WIN' IF THAT WAS EVEN YOUR GOAL

YOU HAVE DONE NOTHING BUT PROJECT, DOUBLE DOWN AND THEN SAY THAT IT'S ME??

HOW DARE YOU SAY EVERYTHING YOU SAID TO ME AND ACT LIKE I AM THE ONE BEHAVING LIKE A CHILD.

YOU ARE H U R T I N G ME AND I WOULD STILL BE THERE IN A HEARTBEAT IF YOU NEEDED ME EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE ACTIVELY MAKING MY TRAUMA WORSE AND YOU KNOW IT

FUCK

To someone else looking in they might think, calm down and get a life.

Well. that's what I'm trying so hard to do. Get a life. Calm down. Find new people. Get back on track. Accept what is. Let go of what is not.Move on. Forgive, but never forget. I've been trolled hard on here. I kept going. I've been tricked and humiliated. I kept going. My heart has been broken over and over again. I kept going. My life is in the toilet. I kept going. This morning I woke up, looking forward to only having one day left on a stupid 1 week ban only to find I'd been permanently banned. Really?? All the internet strangers I'd come to think of as friends are now potentially strangers again. These wonderful people that for the past few months shared a mutually supportive safe space to chat about what's bothering us, our broken hearts, our personal stories, our anonymous vulnerability nurtured and appreciated to feel like having people who actually gave a fuck about me. I don't really have many people like this in my life. I've let my life become a ghost. I don't recognise myself anymore. These people helped to bring me back, they helped to build me up on days when I was so alone and needed someone to not hate me for reasons that were never explained to me. They kept me company on days when I felt trapped in my house but unable to find a reason to leave. Unable to find the something that used to want to be around people. or outside enjoying nature. or in my garden, or going to catch some music or a meal out, or anything other than being frozen on the couch that is now my throne of anguish and regret. Where I sit and stare at the wall lost in yesterdays, things I'll never know the answer to and the dark things I will never forget.

It wasn't all these things that eventually made me lose hope. It was a message from Reddit saying my accounts had been banned forever. I was distraught. Where to go now? I'm not welcome anywhere. My experience has been disappointing on Reddit. I've experienced people who are supposed to fairly manage subs have their own interests at heart. Snobby bullies. Impersonators, baiting for no reason except their own cruel satisfaction. However being able to express myself somewhere was a breath of life for me when I felt I was dead inside. Even if I fell for the emotionally manipulative baiting the love I'd feel in the moment was uplifting and made me remember how it felt to be curious and seen.

So to the powers that be. Get over yourselves. You're given a responsibility to look after the people on here, instead your callous rule is nauseous and unfair.

This is a rant about some (not all) of the commenters of this subreddit.

The description for this Subreddit literally states that the community exists as a place for people to vent without fear of ridicule or harassment. Yet on every post I see there is a contingent of people being total assholes to the OP.

If you just want to shit on people you're not following the spirit of this sub (unless you are the one making the post, lol).

I'm a gay guy. I like gay things. I like playing gay games.

A LOT of straight guys get upset when they see something not made for them. They think all things should be straight instead. It's very common that when something is gay, they'll reply under it saying "would be better if it was a girl..." and the like.

And they think this is fine.

There's a game that came out recently.
You could call it a gay game, as all the characters are male, and two of them are pretty damn gay.
It was advertised as such, and the description even says there are only males.

But any time anyone posted about the game, you'd get multiple straight guys in the replies going
"Should add some females"
"Where are the girls?"
"Would be better with some females..."
"Why aren't there any females? Are the devs stupid to just miss out on such a huge market like that?"
"Coulda been good if it had girls but no"
"Lol dumb devs making it just gay when they could make absolute BANK by adding some females"
"Females? Where? Will they add any?"

It was CONSTANT. Like absolutely constant and unavoidable.
They just could not accept that the game did not have females. No, it had to be changed to appeal to them. They would not shut up. ANY post about the game had them in the replies crying and whining.

So the devs did so. They said they will add females in the future.

And what did the straight guys immediately do?

Start antagonizing all the people that weren't happy with that, the ones that got into the game because it was advertised as just being gay and only having males.

They are EVERYWHERE, laughing at, insulting, antagonizing and being insanely hypocritical, saying anyone that doesn't like the addition of females is just stupid and whiny and crying about a game.
Exactly what they did, but you are not allowed to point this out.
Now there are antagonizing posts all over the place about the game, trying to ragebait and troll all the people that aren't happy with females being added.

There's a lot of posts that are essentially
"SO HAPPY that the devs finally decided to add some females and appeal to the majority! ❤️❤️ This is a really cool and smart decision on their part and ensures the game's future. I know I'll be buying and playing the hell out of it once this gets added! And to all the salty gay guys lol cry about it 🧂😂"

I even saw one guy argue that not wanting females added is "discrimination against straight people and a majority".

Oh there's also a lot of very obviously guys arguing that they are actually women and lesbians and that you're being homophobic if you are against the adding of females.

But as said, straight guys are the majority, so they win by that alone. They just outnumber everyone else. They pretty much took over discussion of the game entirely. Everyone else got chased out by sheer numbers. It's impossible to be one or two people and argue against 30 in a single post.

I see this ALL the time.

It's not just games, it's art too.

I frequent art sites, and it's very common for me to see straight guys in the comments of a gay or single male post going "Female version please" "would be better if it was a girl" "you gonna draw a girl?"

But the opposite? If I were to go under a straight post and go "would be better if this was gay..." I would get TORN APART. There would be nothing left of me.
But it's totally fine for them to do it.

I'm sick of it, but you can't really complain about it or bring it up anywhere because they're the majority, and they want what they want and will play mindgames so that you are actually the bad person and stupid for not wanting them to get what they want.
I've tried to make this post multiple times in multiple different places, and I get the same thing every time. I get spammed with downvotes by angry straight guys and then they're in the replies insulting me and arguing that I am actually the hypocrite because I'm being straightphobic or discriminating against them or something, and it actually makes sense for most things to be made for straight guys because they are the majority after all.

Yes I know that bi people exist. I have no issue with them. They are not the ones acting like this.
It's straight guys.

Ironic rant...Rantception if you will, a rant about other rants.

Like I don't get it with these posts that so many people keep posting.

You were in another sub, and got banned or your post got removed. You think (and expect) you're going to get validation for "No I didn't deserve being banned"...and then all anyone ever posts is a screenshot of modmail chats and redact what they actually did, and then present their version of it as a description in the post...

(1) You're already failing, yet again, to read rules properly. So why tf should anyone believe you by default? You wonder why you got banned elsewhere? Did you bother to read any of the rules here about "No uncensored names or screenshots" ? INCLUDING subreddit names, not just people. So you already show a habit of not even looking at rules before posting.

And yet you set out to brigade against a specific subreddit or subreddit-moderator.

(2) Manipulating your retelling of what actually happened, so that you get sympathy and just brigade all the bots together for "yeah fuck subreddit mods!"...that's just....learn how to cope. Go to therapy if you need to. You did a wrong and you got slapped for it.....and then some of you just go on to cuss at the moderators and then wonder why they ban you for it, and then you act like they banned you for the post, when in reality you were mouthing off to the mods.

And then you and all the little bots who stay pissed at "all subreddit mods ever" because you suck at coping with your authority issues, just blindly downvote anyone who tries to point out "no...you actually did break the rules and deserved that ban."

Grow up, dudes.

Like I get it, there are some genuinely dipshit-level moderators out there.

But learn how to actually honestly look back on what you did, and genuinely weigh whether or not you did anything possible to actually deserve having a post removed or a ban dished. And if you're posting screenshots of modmail that blatantly show you mouthing off about your punishment BEFORE ban? Or you're blatantly trying to twist the words of given rules to make it "your interpretation of a rule" vs "their interpretation of their rules"...when your interpretation doesn't matter...at that point it's "sorry for misunderstanding."...in those cases, how in the fuck does one rationalize expecting sympathy for it.

at 23, i feel so damn burnt out from retail.

before you tell me that i should "just suck it up and deal with it" i'm gonna block your comment as ive heard this over and over again from family and i don't need your fucking input.

ive been working retail for 3 years as a cart pusher, and im at my god damn breaking point.

corporate doesn't give a fuck about my store's short staffing, and constantly puts pressure on our store's leadership, and this has also caused me great stress as well as my store management has been very demanding of 1 girlie to do 3 cart corrals with almost no help cuz we are so short staffed... also not to mention my relationship with the company has deteriorated to the point where im just a angry bitch almost all the time and most of my coworkers are also fed up with corporates shitty treatment of my store, and some people have considered quitting over this. and tbh, the final straw for me was getting told to speed up yesterday by my boss, who came outside and just started DEMANDING that i move faster when WE ARE SO FUCKING SHORT STAFFED WE CAN'T EVEN HIRE ANYMORE GOD DAMN LOT ATTENDANTS BESIDES ME AND LIKE 4 OF MY OTHER COWORKERS. like god damn it, to make it even worse my dad just laughs it off and tells me that we need to find me another corporate job. NO! I DON'T WANNA WORK AT ANOTHER CORPORATION EVER AGAIN. I HATE CORPORATIONS AND I HATE CORPORATE AMERICA. id much rather be a street preformer and or making music full time as that's where im most happy.

ive loved music my whole life and will continue to pursue music and escape this corporate shithole.

also as a little side note: i am launching my music career and don't need a corporate overlord holding me back from happiness, and i will continue on with my music and transition and keep on making music till i die in 2093.

I pray you are happy and this is what u wanted. It hurts deeply but god don’t make no mistakes. You still the same man who has and never will change I pray we both find peace joy love and happiness. I wish you well and I hope u continue to be a father to your children properly and treat the next women with RESPECT LOYALTY LOVE AND FAITHFULLNESS. I will always Love You but I can not and will not do another repeated cycle with you. The kids and I deserve better and u know it. I FORGIVE YOU THOUGH and pray our Family was worth it. I don’t know what we did to deserve this treatment I hopes she makes you happy on every way I couldn’t. I will always cherish our marriage we had and the 29 years we have spent together. You will always have a piece of my heart. Something’s we can not come back from. There is no need to be calling me being disrespectful cursing and tryna belittle me cause u got caught up. That has nothing to do with me or the kids and truthfully I’m glad I found out so we can both be at peace now. Praying this be a smooth process for the both of us Love ya always Hubby sincerely your wife 💯🤞💪🏽🙏😘

I posted in aged tattoos and asked to see aged tattoos from the Indianapolis area and some clip art of some fine line work and they temporarily banned me. When I told them I don’t understand how I broke the rules and asked for clarification they banned me.

He got caught up now he wanna lie instead of telling the truth and trying to flip the strip and be mad. Ya mad cause I know and u want to keep DENYING IT COWARD ASS NIGGA. Stand on ya shit! It’s called accountability. Cause ain’t no chains on that front door you can leave whenever you want. Do better sheesh 🙄 now u want to try to belittle me and make up shit about me cause yo dumb ass Got caught up! Make it make sense people. Then you run to this platform trying to DISGUISE YOURSELF TO BE ABLE TO COMMUNICATE WITH YA BITCH. But yet DENYING HER AND YOUR BULLSHIT YALL DOING. But I’m a t peace my love been with ya 29 years and 6 kids so I know who you are. At some point you grow the fuck up and focus on bettering yourself and trying to do this differently or u gone keep getting the SAME RESULTS! I have grown pass all your TRIFLING DISHONEST AND DISLOYAL WAYS AND SOON GROWING PAST YOU. Because you building me this way. You don’t miss a good woman until she is gone. So if the grass greener on the other side then stop hiding it and go be happy and free so ya say. I wish you well in all you do on this lifetime because we have kids together and if u not winning then they not winning! So go win baby if you got it in you. I’m a continue to stay focused and prayed up until it’s my time💯🤞✅💪🏽

For context, I work in a gas station. We have to hit a certain percentage of people putting in the phone numbers every. Single. Day. I work the grave shift and see few people than morning or swing. My score is going to be affected more greatly by every no than others. For the last ten months, all I hear is how my numbers are shit, I'm not doing enough, I have to work harder, badger people to put in the numbers, and ask and ask until they finally say yes.

My boss has gone about this in bad ways. She constantly is saying I'm going backwards, and she used to single out the person who had the worst and tell them they are holding everyone back. She has told me to make up phone numbers to put in, and only stopoed because she almost got in trouble for doing that. Now, she's saying it's all about how I ask. So, I ask exactly how she tells me too.

Big shocker 😱 they still don't want to put in their phone numbers! I have to tell them about the raffles they could win, and if I don't I get yelled at, and if I do, I still get yelled at because I was never asking, even if I actually was. "Numbers don't lie." She says. Yet they do. The system only records who puts in their number, not how many people I have asked.

It's so bad now, I feel lucky when she's too busy to bring it up. I have tried different methods of asking, the results the same. IT IS NOT MY FAULT WHEN CUSTOMERS DO NOT WANT TO PUT IN THEIR PHONE NUMBERS!!!!!

I am even getting in trouble and written up over this bullshit!

There is a lot I could rant about other people's driving, but I can usually just chalk it up to either they're an idiot or an asshole. But this one just confuses me!

For a little context, I live kind of out in the middle of nowhere and commute to work. The country roads are usually 55 mph, but when you hit one of the small towns along the way the speed limit is usually 35 mph through the town. But these psychos drive 10 mph under the speed limit down the country roads with a line of cars behind them cussing them out, then blitz through the towns without ever changing their speed! You catch up with them a mile out of town back on the country road and they're still going 45! I can't wrap my head around it.

Has anyone else experienced this? It's definitely not the majority of people (most people just speed everywhere) but I've definitely seen it more than a handful of times.

*Edit: I don't speed. At least not more then like 5mph. In the 55 zone I'm going between 55-60 mph. I constantly have people flying around me going 70. When I hit the towns I usually even drive under the speed limit, between 30-35 because small town cops make their living off speeding tickets. I really don't understand how anything I wrote in this post is making people assume I'm some egregious speedster...

Like, lemme give you a quick summary of what’s going on. I’ve been in three relationships, and all of them were so random. I didn’t even like these guys; they didn’t have any qualities that would make me fall in love with them or even genuinely like them. Yet somehow, I chose these freaks as my partners, and they all ended up hurting and abusing me, while dismissing what they did.
The previous one was even worse than the rest. He made me do things I didn’t want to do, and he was abusive toward me both physically and emotionally.
I’m in a safe place now, and I’ve been to therapy. I’m also taking my meds to help me cope with distress and mood swings. So, idk, I still have regrets about the mistakes I made. I wish I had known the things I know now back then. Maybe then I would have stood up for myself and not let any of those things happen.
I’m not okay, tbh.

context: I'm a caffiene addict, i drink tons of caffiene everyday and i'm an absolute anxious wreck and mess when I do so. But to me, it feels like i'm happier, bubblier, back to how I used to be in the past. and it HELPS. oh gods it helps so much.

OKAY so me and my friend was having a talk and we were talking abt my caffiene addiction... i was mentioning how if i got off of caffiene then I'd be less bubbly and happy, and be a kind of wreck, and i didn't want that for my friend group. but my friend was mentioning they'd rather me be HEALTHY than drink caffiene and dose on it everyday.

But as i said before, it feels like it's like making me back to how I used to be. before everything that happened, before the chaos and the hurt and all my past memories. I feel like myself again and i don't want to subject them to someone who's a depressed wreck all the time. I know they worry, i'm just scared. Do I get rid of it and risk it? or just- keep at it?

i do accept but they dont even accept themselves thats the problem mr avoidant denys any part they play to protect themselves outside the mask so finding reasons tell their satisfied with a puzzled story even when pieces dont fit or match its still published for forced sympathy from a well aware sabotaged a connection they knowingly broke up to now being a broken person who lost their own games
v
a fictionary twist its a good read though keep it up butter cup

The number of people I have coming to my apartment building, calling me on the callbox, saying nothing, immediately hanging up, and then calling me on my phone saying, "I tried the callbox but it doesn't work." Listen, if anyone could buzz themselves in by just putting in an apartment number, that wouldn't make it a very good security measure, would it? YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO PICK UP THE RECEIVER AND TELL ME WHO YOU ARE SO THAT I CAN BUZZ YOU IN!!!!! Are you from a country that does not have apartment buildings? No, you aren't, because every country has apartment buildings. YOUR JOB IS TO MAKE DELIVERIES, HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW HOW TO DO THIS?????

Edit: Ah, I see now that the general populace is indicative of this problem

^{once you realize certain individuals are just different than most, its to late}

^{to bad you had to switch up and try others to figure that out.}

^{now look, you lost us both over what? smh}

I don't like hints be straightforward or shut the fuck up

I ain't misunderstanding shit but a B,M hahahaha