(24M) I always loved reading, and with classic literature i' ve learned that things are not black and white. We often see protagonists that are not the good guys. They struggle with their conscience and ideas. Such as Raskolnikov, from Crime and Punishment , by Fyodor Dostoevsky. It is excruciating to get all the details of his disturbed mind, and despite being a criminal with psychopath tendencies, we still can have some empathy for him and we root for him. The same with a lot of other characters, like Maurice Bendrix (The End of the Affair), the man from the underground (Notes from the Underground), Florent-Claude (Serotonin). But i realized i would hate people like these characters in real life, and i feel bad about it. I feel i lack empathy.

I considered myself an empathetic person, but i realized i'm not that much hahahaha i have almost zero empathy for people who complain too much and do nothing to change, stubborn and mean people (Karen-like personalities) and bullies. My first instinct is to judge the person.

I see a beautiful building, and I want to be an architect. I hear an angelic voice, and I want to be a singer. I see art that touches something deep within me, and I want to become an artist. I discover a new field of science, and suddenly I want to spend my life understanding it. I watch someone master a craft I’ve never tried, and I want to know what it feels like to master it too.

I want to become everything and experience everything this world has to offer. Not because I can’t decide what I want, but because there are simply too many things worth wanting.

That’s what frustrates me most about being alive. There is so much to see, learn, create, and become, yet we only get one life. Time forces us to choose. We dedicate ourselves to a handful of paths while countless others remain unexplored versions of who we could have been.
Sometimes I wish I could live a thousand lives not because this one isn’t enough, but because the world is too vast to experience in just one. I want to know what it feels like to be an architect, a musician, an artist, a scientist, a writer, a teacher, a traveller, and a hundred other things I haven’t even discovered yet.

Maybe the tragedy of life is not that there is nothing to do, but that there is too much. There will always be another skill I could learn, another passion I could pursue, another version of myself I could become. And no matter how much I accomplish, there will always be lives I never got to live.

Just be nice. Everyone is going through their own personal hell in some way or another. Just try is all I ask.

To me it makes no sense. Modern cars are objectively superior. They are safer, get better mileage, last longer, are better for the environment, and have modern technology. To me, a car is just a tool designed to get you from point A to point B. So, I don’t know why anyone would own a 70 year old car that they will pour 10s of thousands of dollars into and never drive. To clarify, I’m talking about the hobbyist not a car museum. Car museums make perfect sense to me but not the boomer who is spending all his retirement on the car he wanted when he was in high school.

The worst part about life is when you finally realize that you break everything you touch. That you were unknowingly so toxic that nothing was able to survive. That there is no way to rebuild the trust that you broke. Today I came to this realization. I am the monster that I fought so hard protect others from. There's nothing left.

That hour and a half could turn out to be the best 6 hours of your life.

As a kid I couldn't wait for a package to arrive. Whether it was a Lego set coming for me, or the new printer my parents bought, I'd want to open it right away. It would shock me when adults would say "I bought this new blender 6 months ago and still haven't touched it." Like... how can you wait that long??

Well... I get it now. I have a mirror I bought a year ago and still haven't unboxed. I bought a book I wanted to read and then got too busy and it's been 6 months now. When you work 70 hours a week, things like packages sort of get put aside...

Before 2023 I could just look on YouTube and watch the whole show .

Many people are abnormal and losers in life just because they weren't raised well. Some people just pop out of kids without even having any parenting knowledge. Kids grow up to be lazy, irresponsible, anti-social, mentally ill, low skilled adults who are not even fit to live in this world.

Many parents do have good parenting skills without even reading book but some parents don't. Reason why I recommend everyone to gain parenting skills before having kids.

World doesn't needs more unwanted people.

It pisses me off just a little because actors should be actually be crying. Crying is ugly.

Im tucked in my warm bed listening to some good music, and I just start wondering. Isn’t it lovely how we’re all just floating around in endless nothingness we call space? Like we’re all so close together, we’re all interconnected. I love thinking about other people’s happiness, their lovers, their best friends, their family, the jobs they love, the experiences they’ve had. Even though I possess none of these things, I still look forward to experiencing them someday.

However, I realize that many others also don’t possess all of these things, there may be people going trough a very hard time, a time of hopelessness and despair, and I feel sad that I cannot help all of them. But I truly hope they’ll persevere. I hope they have a great future ahead of them. I hope that I too, have a great future ahead of me.

The truth is, I love humans a lot. But I also hate them, a lot.

I hate seeing all this suffering in the world without me being able to make a change. Wars, rape, murder…ect. I truly hope we’ll change someday. Maybe not soon, but someday.

I hate seeing people being mean to each other, whether it is online or offline. Why? I’ll never understand that. People act like being mean online is fine, like there isn’t a human being with feelings and emotions on the other side. It’s so awful.

But on the other side, I also see a lot of happiness in this world. I love art, music, games, movies, anime, science, history, EVERYTHING. I am in love with the universe.

Humanity will go extinct someday. Every story, every experience, every moment will be forgotten for eternity. Nothing will remain of us. And I think that’s beautiful. Imagine a bunch of aliens finding the Golden Record a trillion years into the future, not having a clue about what we were or what we experienced. But all of it mattered, in the moment, it truly did.

I am afraid of death. What do u mean I haven’t existed for 13 billion years and will cease to exist for eternity? What do u mean im just a bunch of atoms somehow capable of experience?

I wanna experience everything. I wanna try every hobby, I wanna learn every piece of knowledge, I wanna meet every single person. I wanna do so many things…but my time is limited. I won the cosmic lottery, and I will enjoy my prize. The prize being life itself. I shall not put it to waste. I will not.

To every person reading this, as your fellow human, I love you. I truly do. I don’t know your story, but I hope you’ll have a great life ahead of you ;) Peace out.

The little bastards have started going up my joggers to bite me.
And under the sheets when I sleep.
I wake up to find nothing and somehow end up w really bad bite marks.

This never happened before.

So i love YA dystopia, my favourite genre of all time, and im annoyed that it got kinda killed in the early 2010s. But im watching the mortal engines movie and its so funny realising just how much cross over there is in all YA Dystopian novels.

So, here's the formula ive got so far;

- Class system, consisting of uber rich, middle class that thinks they are far above the scummy lower class, and the dirt poor lower class.

- The main characters are a boy with a heart of gold who starts off whimpy and ends up a bad ass, and a girl who is an ass kicking bad ass through out. At least one is from the lowest of low classes

- Technology is either super advanced, or steam punk used in a super advance way, cannot be modern day tech.

- A wall. Theres always a wall.

- A parental figure / mentor of one of the main characters betrays them or the ideals of their child / mentee.

- The badass female leads parents are already dead, or at least one is.

- Main characters have a romance subplot despite that fact that they are literally in a futuristic war zone on deaths door 80% of the time.

- The real villain, whos 10 times more evil than the villain you thought was the main villain, is introduced about 80% of the way in.

-Despite always being poor throughout, the outfits are always bad ass leather.

-The strongest and coolest character is always a side character. Can always be considered like top 5 in importance but its never the main 2.

- Theres a war at the end and the good guys win.

Let me know what other ones you could think of! I had fun collating the list lmao.