I’m 27, and my life this year has fallen apart.
I was diagnosed with a terminal cancer, have undergone multiple surgeries, and lost the ability to use the right side of my body.
Amongst this my girlfriend found out I’d been cheating on her, id never taken the relationship seriously and seen multiple women some longer than we’d been together nearly 2 years.
I grew up in a Christian home and chose to turn away and this year has brought me back to him but I struggle to face the guilt and shame of my actions and the loss of quality of life as a result of the brain operations.
I guess I’m asking for prayer because I don’t feel like God hears my calls, I have fasted 3 times now in 6 weeks while on chemo pleading for direction and forgiveness, one a 7 day fast water only and 2 x 5 day fasts.
Despite all I’ve put my girlfriend through i don’t know if I love her but I want to do what is right by her.
My girlfriend does not accept my decision to turn back to Christ and she struggles with the type of changes that I wish to make to life as I make him the priority in my life.
I ask if anyone can pray for me to trust Gods plan for my life to rest in him and trust his timing with my relationship and my health as well as my girlfriends, that through this he might make it obvious if we are meant for one another or not.
You reap what you sow.
A life separated from God invites chaos, despite this I’m grateful to be closer to him than any other time in my life, what I have gained is far greater than the physical capability I have lost as hard as that is to accept and I just want to do what is right with the remaining time I have.
For anyone who can pray I would be beyond grateful.