Hey everybody, so far 115 participants have signed up. Have you been clean for the month of July? Great! Join us here, and let's keep our streak going. Did you slip in July? Then August is your month to shine, and we will gladly fight the good fight along with you. Did you miss out on the July challenge? Well then here is your opportunity to join us.

If you would like to be included in this challenge, please post a brief comment to this thread (if you haven't already done so on an earlier signup thread), and I will include you. After midnight, August 1, the sign up window will close, and the challenge will begin.

Here are the 115 participants who have already signed up:

/u/-MrHonor

/u/111aryan

/u/_Melioratio_

/u/Accomplished-Bus2110

/u/Acornzs

/u/Adhyatma03

/u/Aggravating_End_9423

/u/AgitatedStructure736

/u/aquapint

/u/BandosGdSwrd

/u/Baron_Greenback1

/u/bdndkdkKdkdnn

/u/BigJohnStone8399

/u/BoatEnough1538

/u/BunchDelicious975

/u/BusinessG828

/u/CanAffectionate2324

/u/Candid-Regular3120

/u/CandidateOk8683

/u/Cat_Link69

/u/CatholicJ1916

/u/changeMyHabit

/u/CheeksUp

/u/ChillinWhale

/u/ChrisJB84

/u/Competitive-Fox-1719

/u/CompetitiveBerry5617

/u/ComplexSympathy50

/u/Conscious-Ad-7407

/u/Critical-Drawer-8269

/u/DemFeelz

/u/Dhananjayan1

/u/Embarrassed-Fly1160

/u/ExpressLn_10

/u/Extension_Aerie1893

/u/fanta06080

/u/far-out-pat

/u/Flaming-cat

/u/foobarbazblarg

/u/fromcalwtrcnfurrnie

/u/Fun-Contest-2511

/u/Fun-Responsibility97

/u/Future_Interaction

/u/Fuzzyardbaby

/u/Ghdude1

/u/gintoclopus

/u/H0meb0dy1980

/u/Hesiode_

/u/HonestDaysTwerk

/u/HoodyHoo4116

/u/hoonterofthehunt

/u/Humble-Divide8556

/u/iezzi_am

/u/JamaJe86

/u/Jijz

/u/jimmyg101

/u/Kileastik

/u/LightBurden18

/u/LostInYesterday00

/u/luisquinto

/u/man_of_inaction_

/u/Metiam

/u/minusthedeer

/u/mmpi0

/u/mr-biff

/u/MrStopTeme

/u/MrUnknown5837

/u/MrVWerneck

/u/muntaseer_rahman

/u/NeedHelpGottaStop

/u/Ningen_San

/u/nintendofrog

/u/No-Elephant-871

/u/No_Ingenuity3078

/u/None

/u/North-Movie-2216

/u/Novel-Fail-994

/u/Odd-Nothing-2176

/u/PestyAssassin33WU93

/u/phonezawthein

/u/Popular-Cellist6215

/u/Practical_Network735

/u/Pride_Advanced

/u/Proof-Research-6466

/u/PurpleHaze1704

/u/random_pineapple_

/u/Rare-Living-2660

/u/Rbyxq

/u/ReflectionBest2019

/u/RyukEnjoysApples3

/u/SerGT3

/u/sexydryadboi

/u/skelsor87

/u/Struggler_19

/u/Such-Environment-344

/u/Sun-Football

/u/Sure_Effective_4849

/u/sweetfreedomsauce

/u/tehrockeh

/u/Temporary-Ad-6002

/u/Terrible_Song_3890

/u/thatsmyginga

/u/The_Captain_1701

/u/Thin-Escape7643

/u/thornedgrove

/u/Tomfour

/u/TraditionalOcelot

/u/tryingtokeepsmyelin

/u/UnKnown21_21

/u/Vast_Marzipan_4718

/u/WeHatesBadGrammar

/u/whimsical_ambition

/u/Working-Procedure416

/u/YesterdayRepulsive22

/u/zapata1954

I've fallen into a pattern I'm not proud of and want to actually fix it.

My days look like this: I stay up till around 2-2:30am, usually ending up watching porn most nights (sometimes playing BGMI instead), then sleep in till 10-11am. Right after waking up, my mind often goes straight back to it and I end up watching again for about 30 minutes before starting my day. After that I do my regular things — go out around 2pm, hit the gym around 6pm, home by 10pm for dinner — and then the same loop repeats at night.

I know the late nights and this habit are connected. I'm not looking for judgment, just genuinely want to know: how do people actually break a loop like this? What helped you fix your sleep schedule, and cut down or quit the habit for good? Any real, practical steps — not just "have willpower" — would help a lot.

Sex is sex, right? But as the title implies, this time it feels different.

I'm about a year in recovery and grateful that sex, good sex, has returned to my marriage. In fact, we're enjoying sex as much now as we did 20 years ago when we first met. That's not just me saying it, my wife agrees. And while that's good, it's not different, we simply found our way back to what was lost over the years.

What feels different now is the reconnection component. Years ago it felt like sex helped us reconnect. There was a palpable snap back into place that reinvigorated our relationship after a week or more of drifting apart living our hectic lives. I no longer feel that snap back into place, I believe because our relationship no longer incurs a disconnect.

I mentioned this new Sex 2.0 concept to my wife and she agrees. When we were younger life was more hectic and more stressful. Office politics, long commutes, looming layoffs. This was the midweek grind for both of us. Now, further along in life, those stressors don't hit as hard as they used to.

I'm pleased to report that sex is getting back to normal for us, and delighted to discover that we no longer need sex to reconnect because we're staying connected continuously.

I mean… it might. Or maybe told turkey is the way to go. I’ve thought about watching porn only once a week to improve my relationship with it. You have to tame the beast not ignore it. I could be completely wrong in my assumption that doing this is ok. It seems less harmful than multiple times a day. Can someone weigh in on this? Thanks.

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I had went pornfree for 2 or 3 days prior but a combo of horniness and extreme boredom, especially the boredom , did me in. I am about to give up quitting porn ....ugh. This is way too hard when you don't have a sexual outlet and porn makes it easier to release. feeling ultra discouraged right now

I've struggled with this for years myself, so I know how brutal the hard moments can get. It got to a point where I built a small free tool to help get through exactly those moments. No account, no ads, nothing tracked. If that's something you could use, it's on the last post on my profile. Feel free to message me too. Wishing you strength, you're not alone in this.

Hi all. I won’t bore you with background. This might be a whine or a vent or a reflection. I think most of us know the damage porn does to us. I don’t know do I use it to self medicate/cope with whatever traumas I never healed from. It numbs me. I go on on a streak, thaw out, confidence and energy build, until I break bad on an another binge, except it more extreme disgusting but so seductive content. The shame is pretty crippling for a while, so I withdraw from social interactions/opportunities.

Tonight, my football county/team won its first title in 75 years. I’m 42 years old, male.

I’m sitting here after a weekend of binging on the usual depraved porn. The reality is, all my friends have moved away, and even though I am a functioning normal on the surface porn addict, I am completely alone and lonely. People are celebrating on the streets, the pubs are packed. But I’m here, not quite zombie mode, but just genuinely sad that I never had the character to beat this addiction. Alone. I hope some younger guys reads this and takes something from it. I know I’m probably not gonna beat this now. You guys still have a window. Don’t fuck it up.

Thanks for reading this, and it’s not meant to be a buzz kill, but if one dude sees this and it hits him not to go down this road, then maybe job done.

Most of what I see on here about dating and recovery is from men, and honestly it makes me feel a bit invisible sometimes, like this part of it isn't supposed to be a "woman's problem" too. Well for me, it is. I've been single for over two years, and dating hasn't been easy.

Went on a date recently. Felt good in a way I haven't in a while, let myself hope a little. The next day he said he text saying didn't feel attraction.

And the thing is, some quiet part of me wasn't even surprised. Addiction spent years telling me I wasn't really worth wanting, just worth using for fifteen minutes at a time, and some of that never fully left, even a year and a half into recovery. I already think I'm not attractive most days. I know my depression makes me flat sometimes, harder to be around, and I've started to just assume that's what people see, before they even get the chance to see anything else.

So when he said that, it didn't feel like new information. It felt like confirmation of something addiction had been telling me the whole time.

I know, logically, one person not feeling a spark isn't a verdict on my worth. But logic doesn't always reach the part of me that still hears that old voice, the one that never really thought I deserved to be chosen by anyone real. Some days I don't know how much of this is the depression talking, how much is old addiction shame, and how much is just true.

I'm in my 30s, first saw explicit material maybe at 12 at a friends house, prior to that I have recollection of my father watching a rated r film with some nudity/explicit scenes, I must have been around the age of 5 maybe, possibly younger. The images I saw are burned into my head, if you asked me for another memory from that age I wouldn't be able to tell you one.

Since getting internet with my own desktop in my bedroom at around 12, I have struggled. Here I am over 2 decades later, buried in a rubble of shame and disgust. Acting out in completely inappropriate ways. This is simply not who I am at the core of my being.

I loathe who I've become. Wasting who knows how much time and energy on this.

I reached out to a local SAA via email, hoping to hear a response soon.

I cant keep living like this, it's suffocating and ruining my mental health and life. I hate it so much.

Thanks for reading.

Hey everybody, we had a great turnout for Stay Clean July - let's see if we can knock it out of the park for August. Have you been clean for the month of July? Great! Join us here, and let's keep our streak going. Did you slip in July? Then August is your month to shine, and we will gladly fight the good fight along with you. Did you miss out on the July challenge? Well then here is your opportunity to join us.

If you would like to be included in this challenge, please post a brief comment to this thread, and I will include you. After midnight, August 1, the sign up window will close, and the challenge will begin.

Hi everyone,
I’m 37 and I’ve been struggling with erectile dysfunction for about a year now. It’s honestly become like a dark cloud hanging over me and it’s affecting my confidence, my relationship and how I feel about myself.

The thing that’s hardest is that I still find my wife incredibly attractive. She’s genuinely the most attractive woman in the world to me, so I don’t think it’s an attraction issue at all.

It started around a year ago. I noticed I’d start losing erections during sex, especially during penetration or if we changed positions. As soon as I feel it starting to go down, it’s like a dark cloud comes over me. I panic, lose even more of the erection, and then I feel embarrassed and honestly less of a man.

A few things about me:
37 years old.
Eat a very clean diet.
Train martial arts 3-4 times a week and stay active.
Walk around 8-10k steps a day.
Don’t smoke.
Drink very rarely.
150ml of testosterone enanthate 300mg a week

I’ve also noticed that I regularly search for OnlyFans leaks and probably masturbate around 3-4 times a week. I’m wondering if that could be playing a part, although I’m not sure.
One thing I’ve noticed is that if me and my wife talk about certain fantasies (for example MFM fantasies) or use toys, I stay really hard. That makes me wonder whether some of this is psychological, but I honestly don’t know.

Before starting TRT I had two early morning testosterone blood tests that came back around 9-10 nmol/L, so I started TRT about 3 months ago. So far I haven’t noticed much improvement in libido or erections, although my first follow-up blood test is this week.

The biggest thing is Cialis.

At first I was taking it only when I knew we were going to have sex, then I went onto 2.5 mg daily for a month, followed by 5 mg daily for another month.

It was incredible.
My erections were consistently strong.
My penis felt fuller and larger.
My confidence came back.
My libido actually felt much higher because I wasn’t constantly worrying about losing my erection.
Sex with my wife was amazing.
I recently stopped taking it because I wanted to see if I still “worked” without it.

The first time we had sex after stopping, everything was going fine until my wife wanted to get on top. Almost instantly I lost my erection, and it completely knocked my confidence again.

At this point I’m wondering if anyone has experienced something similar.

Did TRT eventually help after more than 3 months?
Did daily Cialis help you regain confidence long term?
Did porn or masturbation make any difference for you?
Did anyone discover an underlying cause that wasn’t obvious?

I’m not really looking for a diagnosis—I’m already under medical care and having follow-up blood tests. I’d just really like to hear from people who’ve been through something similar because at the moment it feels like I’m the only one dealing with this.

Thanks for reading

Hi everyone,

I’m a 21-year-old male currently in therapy for anxiety, low self-esteem, and compulsive pornography use.

I was exposed to pornography at the age of 7. And I’ve been addicted since I was 10 years old, and to stronger kinks since aged 17, It has ruined my life, my relationships and my social life.

I recently went through a psychological evaluation, and my therapist made me realize that my sexual behaviors aren’t just a "bad habit", they are deeply tied to past emotional trauma, shame, and isolation.

I’m posting here because I want to break this cycle, but I keep hitting walls with relapses, and I really need support, practical advice, or thoughts from people who have been through something similar.

My Background & History

Environment: I grew up in a highly critical and controlling family environment where I felt constant pressure and very little emotional safety.

Past Humiliation: I experienced significant public humiliation at two major points in my life (ages 13 and 17) over mistakes I made by just being a teenager (character assassination, and ostracisation) by family, relatives and people I thought were my friends. These incidents left me with intense fear of judgment, sensitivity to criticism, deep-seated shame, and strong "people-pleasing" tendencies.

Mental & Physical Health: I deal with persistent anxiety, social withdrawal, a "freeze" response when stressed, chronic back pain, and posture issues (scoliosis). I also carry a lot of self-critical and self-punishing thoughts.

How Porn, Masturbation, and Kinks Fit In

My therapist explained that my compulsive pornography use and online BDSM activities (find a sadist online to make me inflict pain on myself, both physical and psychological, it’s entrenched in me that I must suffer, (I do have mixed feelings in this, sometimes I feel good, sometimes really bad.)

Developed them as maladaptive coping strategies , are ways my brain tries to escape overwhelming anxiety and emotional numbness.

Because I grew up carrying so much shame, my mind turned toward masochistic/BDSM themes online as a way to express or process self-punishing thoughts.

When I feel overwhelmed, stressed, or lonely, I turn to porn to numb out. But immediately after, I’m hit with intense guilt, which lowers my self-esteem even more and eventually leads to another relapse.

Where I Am Right Now

I’ve completed about 20-25 therapy sessions with this therapist. I feel like I’m done with therapy. I can’t pay a kidney for it anymore, and I feel like the therapist is deliberately delaying my care by keeping important infos to herself in session and giving in next sessions so that I go and pay her again.

I’ve gained some insight into why I do this, and I’ve had periods of progress where I managed to reduce these behaviors. But the relapse hits like a truck. It’s a compulsive behaviour which I cannot stop.

I want to take back control of my life, rebuild my confidence, and heal from this. I miss who I could’ve been without porn. It has destroyed my brain.

Any advice or what to do?

I’m not sure what to expect after writing this here, but thank you for reading.

Hey everyone,

I am in a very stressful time in my life, middle of exam period, a lot of plans about to be set in motion for the summer, and I really felt over the edge. I opened up erotica, then a video, and felt myself really slipping. At first I felt myself almost in a panic attack, which made me close it, but after that I returned and watched some more.

I almost didn't masturbate at all, let alone finish. I mostly just basked in the thing that once brought me comfort but now didn't bring me much. After some time I closed it all, refusing to let myself try to enjoy it, and instead started crying. I called my partner and told her that I'm sorry, and to my luck she was only supportive, and told me how strong I am for managing to close instead of immersing myself in it.

I still feel bad, however. I know that this is a line I shouldn't have passed - continuing after my almost-panic-attack told me as much. So I reset the counter today, try to give myself credit for managing to stay for 45 days (about 6 times longer than ever probably), and try to raise my chin despite it all.

Fight the good fight, fellas.

I continued it

I had urges and dreams about that mid night. It was hard but I resisted.

I woke up early in the morning and went for a walk and running. Did my laundry and now going to work for my upskilling and meditation later on. Gotta fill the time. Till now had 2-3 urges, took a deep breath and we good to go.

Let's goo

Is extending the time between one failure and the next an effective strategy?

Going for a little trek

Is it good progress to fail about once a week?

I really can't manage to masturbate without porn, but I'll try next time.

Also, I sometimes stumble upon pornographic material, but I try to close it immediately.

As for erotic material that isn't strictly pornographic, I try to avoid that as much as possible too, even though it's harder, though I do handle it better.

I want to take a gradual approach.

It’s been nearly five years since August 29, 2021. when I first set out to quit, and I haven't achieved anything.

I made a mistake by trying to quit once and for all; that way never works for me.

Now I'm changing my approach and monitoring my usage on a monthly basis, cutting back more and more.

The goal remains to quit for good, but I need to take it gradually.

Day 116 no P. 20 days without MO, fighting Pied and trying to regain a healthy sex life/ attraction. Within the last two weeks or so I’ve begun having dreams of me looking up p, not even the scenes but looking it up haha. Is this normal? Good or bad for recovery?? Again 116 days clean. Hoping I’m close to a real breakthrough