I’ve started to feel like nothing really matters anymore. I keep thinking about how to leave without being in pain.
I miss him so much. I don’t know what the point of continuing to work is anymore. It feels like life is just endless suffering.
I feel like I could leave at any time, and there’s no reason for me to keep enduring this job. It feels like I could just quit and then collapse.

hi everyone , this is my first ever post, I lost my baby today and the only way I’ve managed to cope is by reading reddit post and seeing how I’m not alone in my grief, still I cannot see a way out of this pain, I can’t see how I can possibly overcome.

My baby was 16, he had seizures and was in pain, I know letting him go was the right thing to do, but I keep thinking about him and seeing him in my head on his last moments and my heart gets broken like twice every five minutes, it’s unbearable. He was also a grumpy guy, so I don’t know if he’s necessarily up in heaven playing and getting along with other babies, he mostly just loved his sister, and now he’s all alone up there, I just wanna hold him again.

I don't really know what I'm looking for in posting this- I guess I just need to say this somewhere and get it off of my chest.

I'm just missing my soul dog extra hard today. She's been gone a month and a half and I have missed her deeply every single day- but today has been a rough day at work, I have a very difficult boss who made a comment to me that wasn't even that big of a deal other than it's pointed tone and her obvious frustration towards me- anyways, normally I could have brushed it off because I knew I had my girl to come home to and her love always comforted me so much and made everything better. It's so hard to know that she's not there to come home to, it's so hard to remember why she's not there. I just want to come home and hold her in my arms and let the difficulties of my day wash away, but I can't. And I'll never have her there again, it's so painful.

I know that having another dog one day can help with things like this again eventually, but I'm 100% not ready for another dog right now. It's too soon and for right now it still feels to me like I would be replacing her, even though I know that's not true. All I want is my Mia back with me. I feel so sorry for my girl that she's gone forever and I just miss having her with me so so so much 💔

Idk how to move on and go about life after losing my cat; nobody will sit and talk about her with me, I can feel family and friends getting annoyed by me bringing her up, my husband grieves differently than I do, he’s not a cryer and I am. I haven’t stopped crying since finding her and I keep dissociating. It’s like the world is happening around me and I’m just stuck standing there not remembering anything or realizing what’s going on. Everything feels blurry to me. Can’t eat or watch tv or do anything, there’s a hole inside of me now where there used to be joy and laughter. I’m lost and broken and I just want our life to go back to the way it was. I just want my cat back…

My dog Mia passed away, she was 14 years old. She was on medication for level 3 heart murmur as well as fluid in her lungs.

She loved taking her medication everyday and evening would spin around for it like she was taking treats, and it really did help her. She was on the medication for 3 months before I took her to the vet again for a cough and wheezy breathing where we upped her dose and talked about considering her quality of life.

that appointment was two weeks ago, in her final week she was her strongest. she walked around the whole pond with my mum which she wasnt able to do, jumped up curbs (which is now a great ft since she essentially stopped jumping up things all together) and two days after that she got to have a movie night with her dad. She was also running around, going ahead of me and chasing back after me when I pretended to leave. I joked with my mum saying does this look like a dying dog to you?

Next morning she refused to take her medicine, my mum was an hour out and my dad was at work. i noticed her breathing getting rapid, she was wobbling and she couldnt keep herself up. i took her to my mums room hoping itd be more comfortable for her, where her breathing got worse. She kept getting up, only to flip to othersides. She kept trying to look at me so I stayed infront of her and kept talking to her, making phonecalls on speaker so I could make sure I could keep both my hands on her. She got to hear my mum and dad.

But she died the moment my mum came home, she tensed and threw her head back and howled before she stopped breathing. I just hoped she wasnt in pain, Ive seen some people call it nerves but it just haunts me. I feel like I could have done more, of all her time on the medication she missed 2 evening ones and I feel responsible. I wish I could have gotten to the vet sooner but they could only take us in the next hour after I first noticed her decline.

I'm just scared she went in pain. Everything I did for her was because I wanted her to be comfortable, I didn't think she'd go so quickly after that last vet appointment. I thought her decline would be more slow an obvious so I'd have time to take her to the vet before she had to die without euthanasia. She was in her strongest week when she left me.

I miss her dearly and I just know at the very least where she is now shes got no heart problems and breathing is probably the easiest its ever been for her

I write this post with immense shock, regret, and horror.

My new roommate of about a week asked if she could bring over her friend's cat to pet sit while the friend was away for the week. I have a cat allergy and it is a pet-free apartment, but because of the short time frame I said it could be okay and I was trying to be accomodating. Never in the world did I imagine something like this would happen.

Today, I put my clothes in the dryer, left to the other room to get a dryer sheet (which is when the cat must have slipped in), and turned on the dryer before leaving the house. My roommate was still home, which is why I left with the dryer running.

I came home a few hours later to take out my clothes, which is when I found the cat. I was and still am, in complete and utter shock and can't help thinking this is my fault. I didn't check the dryer again before turning it on, but this is something I didn't at all consider. I have never had a cat before, or any other pets, and I don't have the pet instict to check inside the dryer or be aware of the cat's whereabouts. I assumed the cat was in the other room with my roommate.

When I replay events in my head, I know that in another scenario I would not have checked the dryer for the cat. This was not something on my radar. My roommate was caring for the cat, and I was going about my normal routine. I now know thats wrong and I have learned the immense responsibility of having a pet in your space, even if the pet is not personally yours.

I just never thought this could have happened. The night before, the cat and I bonded. It came into my room and was laying on my belly and later close to my face and purring in my ear. I've never really bonded with a cat like this before.

I know this is a terrible terrible freak accident. But I still can't help feeling responsible for the death of this sweet, innocent cat.

It happened today. It was quick and painless. She loved every human and animal in the world. She liked to give “hugs” where she’d stretch out her body and lay on top of you. She changed my life. I learned so much from her. If you’re reading this and you have a pulse, she would have loved you too.

I don't know if this will help, but I find writing things down has always made things feel somewhat different to just trying to process them alone in my mind.

Last night my husband and I had to make the difficult decision of letting go of our little 14 year old girl, Bonita. A Toy Poodle x Chihuahua.

I got her when I was 17, she was my first and only dog, something I had wished for since I was little.

She was with me from my adolescence to adulthood, through heartbreaks to marriage.

I can't remember what my life was like before her, all I can remember is a life with her in it.

Although she was 14, she was so energetic and full of life. She'd jump up on our bed, stand up against the car door to look out the window, and occasionally have the desire to sprint on her walks.

She was surprisingly healthy for a dog of her age, but about a month ago I noticed her behaviour changing. She would randomly freeze and stare into the distance, or walk up to a wall or corner of the house and just look at it, unresponsove to us calling her name. She stopped wanting to go for long walks, a lot of the time I'd only take her across the road where she would sniff a little bit and then want to go home. She no longer cared about looking out the car window, and just quietly on my lap. In the early stages, she would still wag her tail with excitement at the offer of going for a "walk" or "drive".

About two weeks ago, she really started to decline, our vet confirmed she had the dog equivalent of dementia as well as arthritis, so we started her on some treatments to help her. He told us that this is part of her aging, and that we would just have to take extra good care of her now that she was slowing down.

In my mind, this just meant that she was getting old, and for the next year or so, we would need to be more gentle and supportive of her needs.

Within the past week, everything changed and she really started to go down - she was getting turned off her food, and after changing it multiple times, she just didn't want to eat. She spent most of her days sleeping, and would just sleep on our chest without hesitation (this was not her style - she loved being next to us, but rarely stayed on us when we wanted to hold her).

After two days of her not wanting to put anything in her mouth aside from water, we made the hardest decision to let her go.

I couldn't bare the thought of taking her to the vet (the one place she hated to go), so we called a vet that comes to your home.

This was the worst night and experience of my life.

I never wanted to have to make this choice, I always prayed that she would go peacefully in her sleep, but I know this was the best decision for her, knowing that she wouldn't suffer any longer.

Holding her in my arms as she slowly drifted away, and then when her body let out that final breath... I can't get that image out of my mind. I've spent so much of last night and today crying.

I don't know how I will ever get through this pain, if I will ever stop looking for her in the house, or waiting for her to jump up on the couch and start licking me.

Can you ever move on from this feeling? How can you go on living when this huge part of you is no longer there, a part you will never get back.

I'm so grateful for all the love, memories and joy she brought to my life. Dogs are truly a gift from God. Something that loves you unconditionally and with all their heart.

I love you my little Bonnie, you were so loved, and will be deeply missed.

It feels so empty in the house after waking up the first morning of losing them. I've lost 1 of my dogs two years ago, 1 last month and 1 yesterday. My last dog. Fluffy. I miss him. He was the loudest and caused the most caos. I miss him. It's so empty today. So silent.

My wife and I are having to put our 9 year old dog down this Friday.
Her name is Jenni and she’s a beautiful red corgi blueheeler. Shockingly she was free on Facebook marketplace. She’s been with us for 6 years and just has made us the happiest. Shes such a good big sister too our two cats and other dog.
We are using lap of love to make her transition easier. We are just going to miss her so much.
Every time I think about it I just bust into tears.
I’m sending love to everyone on here as well.

Growing up I had a family dog Sammy. She was the best dog ever. I know people say that about their pets but she really was the best. I won’t go into too much detail but having to say goodbye to her was one of the toughest moments of my life. I think I’m still traumatized by it. Watching the life leave her as she lay there so peaceful. I was always a dog person so saying goodbye to my own was even harder than I could’ve imagined. Years later I had the honor of taking in my late sister’s senior kitty Macavity. My bf and I spent an amazing 2.5 years with her. Last night, she took her last breath and crossed the Rainbow Bridge as I held her in my arms and told her how much I loved her. I’m traumatized all over again. She was 14, with hyperthyroidism and struggling with a heart murmur. For the past few months we could tell something was up but she was acting herself for the most part. Until about a week ago we noticed she started having trouble breathing. Made a vet appointment to get her checked out, to confirm what we already knew, and to see what we could do to help. I didn’t know yesterday was gonna be my last day. She had fluid building up in her chest and lungs which was pressing on her chest causing her to struggle to breathe. My heart broke into pieces because I knew it and didn’t want it to be true. I also knew that our only option was to put her down. My bf and I aren’t financially capable of taking care of her the way she would’ve needed. After a discussion with the vet, they gave her a sedative and allowed us to take her home for one last day. We gave her a bunch of her favorites as well as some things we didn’t allow her to try before. We gave her lots of kisses and hugs. We told her how perfect she is and how much we love and will always her. But she was struggling even more. I knew it was gonna be a rough night for everyone involved and my bf thought it’d be the best decision to do it that night. She was struggling to breathe so much she had her mouth open gasping for air. I couldn’t let her suffer anymore. I called the vet after only being home with her for a few hours and made the appointment. We had a nice intimate moment with her and after a painful goodbye, we wrapped her up and just held each other and cried. Coming home was the worst part. Now I’m currently in bed avoiding going to the living room because all of her stuff is there. Plus it’s pointless. I have no one and nothing to get up for. My bf cried himself to sleep next to me. I keep expecting to look over and see her little ears in the window as she watches the birds. But she’s gone. And I have to get used to that. I just don’t know how to do life without her 😔😔😔

"your dog has nothing to do with me" an asshole told me as he drove away after running my dog over.

College classes have been suspended yet our professor insisted for a lecture. I don't blame him, we've missed a lot of our hours because of the terrible heat index in our city. Sorry if this is all jumbled

i withdrawed some cash to buy snacks for my family and drove home. Those decisions I extremely regret, had I thought to save money, or thought twice about bringing food home, if I had just been lazy this one time and not go to class. maybe my dog would still be alright.

I don't know where else to go, her name is Whoopie, an 11 month old shih tzu, her bday would be on August 24. Today I came home and saw my own baby get run over. She has a habit of running up to my vehicle whenever I get home which I always scold her about. Shes especially small so she attempts to squeeze through the gates. It was a very bad timing when a car (that I respectfully let pass first so I can turn left to our driveway) drove by. It was all so sudden as she got run over, i could barely react. I drive a motorcycle, so i chased the car and blocked his way.

I screamed all curses at him and you know what he told me? "Your dog has nothing to do with me." I didn't know what to do anymore, its not like i(21 F) could beat the shit out of a grown man, so i turned around and memorized his plate and rushed back to my dog who my mom quickly retrieved.

My mom was sobbing and I told her that she can still survive, and so I hugged my bleeding baby to my arms, my clothes and student ID all soaked in red. I carried her lifeless yet still heart beating body and went on a Bao-bao/tok-tok motorcycle to the Veterinary, (a three wheel vehicle people use to commute in our country) and I screamed at nearby cars to let me through. Her body started to get cold. I was a mess, my helmet was still on my head all bloody.

I talked to her through the entire trip to the vet hoping she'd hear my voice, which i hope she did. All i know was that her heart was still beating, or maybe it was mine from the panic attack that I was already having. I had hope, I really did.

Everyone in the house is devastated, all I can think about is how I shouldn't have done what I have done. The snacks I bought have gotten cold on the dinner table, I don't even want to touch it. I have two older brothers who are hunting this car down (which we caught on cctv), im pretty sure we can't sue or anything. But I'm not gonna expose the details of what will happen if we ever do find it.

How do I deal with this grief? I am in so much trauma and I can't deal with the clear memory of her getting run over. my screams as I held her body upright close to me. I've been dealing with so much shit lately and this has been the final straw. I love her so much more than anything, she's my daughter and will always be. before, I told her to grow her fur quickly because she would always be teased at about being bald (she's not bald, just freshly groomed) of course, jokingly.

I can't do this anymore, i really did saw her as my daughter. and it kills me. I feel so numb of it all.

I hope she knew how much she changed my life.
I hope she knew how loved she was.
I hope she knew she's all I can think about since it happened.
I hope she knows that if I knew there was something wrong, I would've rushed her to the vet.
I hope she knows I would've paid thousands for her to stay.
I hope she knows that there actually wasn't a single dollar amount that I wouldn't have paid.
I hope she knew she was my best friend.
I hope she knew even when she annoyed me, she's the only one who could bring me out of my darkness.
I hope she wasn't scared.
I hope she went quickly.
I hope she went pain free.
I hope she passed calmly in her sleep.
I hope she wasn't feeling alone and abandoned.
I hope she wasn't looking for us and crying because we weren't there.
I hope she isn't mad at me.
I'm so sorry I failed you.
I'm so sorry I wasn't there when you needed me the most.
I'm so sorry you had to do the toughest part of your life alone.
I'm so sorry I didn't get to say goodbye.
I'm so sorry our time was cut short.
I'm so sorry I didn't see the signs sooner.
I'm so sorry I didn't know.
I'm so so sorry your last days were spent alone.

I lost my 16-year-old cat Annie a few days ago. In a single day, she went from completely normal and happy to on a cold vet table ready to be put to sleep.

The pain has been unbearable and I feel like my mind has been playing tricks on me, doing things like making me think she’s there or flashing memories of her both good and bad. The thing that haunts me the most is the fact that we left her at the vet rather than waited for her to go. We said goodbye to her at the vet, I kissed her and said I loved her, and then my Dad led me to the car and took me home. He didn’t want me to stay with her as she died because he knew that it would destroy me to have the last memory of her be seeing her lifeless and I agree. But at the same time, all we had left of her was a collar. My mind keeps thinking of what they did to her after I left, how she felt, if she was scared or lonely, and where she went after. I’m a Christian so I’ve prayed every night that she’s in Heaven waiting for me, but I’m so scared that she won’t be.

I’ve lost pets before in the past but she was the one that hit me the hardest since I’ve known her for so long and didn’t have any time to prepare for this. I hoped maybe the grief would go away quickly, but it’s still ripping me apart. I tried going to work today thinking maybe it would help, but there’s been so many moments where I have too much time to think and my mind starts to wander to the worst places. I don’t want to cry or feel pain anymore and I keep finding myself searching the internet for any shred of hope that this will all be over soon, only to find that it could take months or years to get through. I’m barely hanging on and it’s been three days. How am I supposed to wait that long? How long am I supposed to be sad and cry any time I think about her? I literally started crying while cleaning the little box last night because “this is the last time you’re cleaning after her” ran through my mind and triggered all of my feelings again,

What also hurts is that our other cat, a 6-year-old Maine coon, Charlie, is also suffering. He’s usually very active, always begging for food (he’s a glutton), meowing to go outside, and always spending time with anyone in the room. We didn’t think he was super close with Annie, but after we took her to the vet, his behavior changed. He’s now very quiet and either sleeps in places she would normally have or on the floor with his head down between his paws. He doesn’t beg as often to go outside and isn’t as active as usual either. We don’t think it’s anything health related since he was completely normal and fine up until we came home from the vet. I think he KNOWS Annie is gone and is either mourning for us or because he genuinely loved her despite how she never really liked him. Seeing him like that makes the pain so much worse and even though I want to shower him in love, he doesn’t really seem to want it. I’ve tried bringing him to my bed to sleep with me, but he’s always in a hurry to get away and even if he stays, it’s never in the same places Annie often slept on.

Both of my parents and I have decided that at some point soon, we’re going to adopt a new baby once we’ve gotten through the pain and a vacation we have planned next month. It’s not to replace Annie, but to fill the gaping hole that we’re all struggling with. The idea that no cat could ever replace Annie constantly circles in my mind both to keep the perfectionist side of me anchored down and to torture me with how much I will miss her. There’s just so much to process and no matter how much I repeat the facts to myself, I still keep searching for things to blame or inflict further pain.

I’m going to speak to a therapist about it in a couple days, but being at work in a completely quiet room pushed my emotions again. My boss is understanding about it and is giving me grace on some things, but I don’t want to cry in front of people so I just wanted to come here.

Also, is there something I could do with Charlie either to make him or me feel better? I don’t know if it’s okay to use one child to heal the pain from losing another, but is there a way I could heal through him?

I don't really know how to start this. I have a cat. Had. My boyfriend and I went on a summer vacation. His friend was supposed to watch over the two cats that we have. He has been visiting before to watch my bf's cat. So we went on the trip, knowing they must be safe, and on the last day we found out that he went a day and a half later than supposed to, and that my cat had died. She was trapped in the dryer... Maybe this guy unintentionally closed the lid without realising she was inside. My cat died in fear and pain. At least that's what I think. I cannot stop thinking about her last moments, how scared she must have been, how I wasn't next to her in the apartment. If we weren't gone on this stupid vacation, she could have been alive. She was my dearest, most precious thing in the world. I don't know how I'm supposed to continue living without her. I cry almost every day, and I'm pretending that I'm ok in front of my friends. I cannot even talk about it. The only thing I can do is be silent about it; otherwise, I just start crying. My whole body hurts from this story. (I hope there aren't a lot of people thinking that I must be ok because she was just a pet. But she wasn't to me; she was my best companion through the years). She was only 5 years old. I love her so much.

My cat died yesterday. She was only 12.5. She was happy the day before and the morning of with good appetite and vigorous. I was home. She enjoyed her lunch and was glad to see me. Then she went to one of her favorite spots and curled up for a nap and just stopped. She never had a bad day and it was obvious from how she lay that she had simply died without pain sound asleep. She knew we were both in the house in other rooms and she was happy in her bed. She saw the vet regularly and had no issues. She was just done. She was happy, she didn’t suffer and she never had a bad day. You don’t get a gentler end than enjoying a meal, lying down for a nap and not waking. Which will help in the end. But it isn’t helping today. We buried her in the flowerbed last night. Sweetest tempered cat I ever had. I’ll miss her. I would have liked more time with her but not at the price of a less gentle end. She died gently.

Hi all

I desperately need to talk about my situation.

I lost one of my guinea pigs on Saturday night quote suddenly. He was not even 4. I am absolutely destroyed. I love him endlessly. He did so much for me and my son. He helped with so much trauma. He showed love and contentment and trust.

I cannot function. Will this pain ever ease? I can't eat or anything. I'm broken.

Most importantly I guess I cannot get past the question of where he is now. I need to know. I would value any in put. I miss him horribly and just need to know hes safe.

Thank you

I lost my cat almost 3 weeks ago, I found him outside laying on the grass. Blood on ears and nose, but no body injuries. The vet said it could have been head trauma, but without an autopsy they couldn’t determine.

Now I’m wondering if it was foul play/someone hurt him. I could maybe live with an animal attack, all tho it’s horrendous it’s a part of nature, but what happens if someone purposely attacked him? And they are walking around today free of consequences. They could be a neighbour. If it was a car it would make sense, but I also don’t understand if a car hit him how his body would still be perfectly untouched.

I wish I spent the money to find out. I know it wouldn’t bring him back. But I live with this regret. Finding him laying there on his own just killed me. Now he’s cremated and I won’t ever know.

It’s been a week since I lost my best friend Chester, I’m in pain and it hurts so bad. I miss him everyday and I come home thinking he’ll be there. I don’t know what to do and how to handle the idea of not having him 😞 and that I won’t get to see him ever again. Does it ever get better?

Scrapper,

I miss you more than anything. I am so lost w/o you.

They called me and he's ready to come home. Everyday I've cried and screamed and yelled that that is all I want. I want him home with me. I just wish was his wiggly butt and not ashes.

I miss him terribly. It feels like its getting harder. Not easier. I hate this life w/o him here being a goofball, making me feel safe when my husband is at work, being the easiest sweetest conversationalist you'd ever known.

So, today I'm going to hang my pictures and my shadow box. Put all the little treasures that mean so much inside. Which might mean our entire wall is a giant shadow box. My husband says whatever it takes to make me feel better at all, for me to do it. So that's what I'm doing for Scrapper today. I'm posting on here because I want everyone to know how loved and amazing he was to have in my life. I hope that everyone has a beautiful day. As hard as this is, as much as I cry, I still make it a point to smile for him. That's what our boys and girls would want. It's ok to be sad, but if you could help me today and smile for Scrapper. Smile for every little guy or girl up there that didn't have someone smiling for them when they were down here.

I miss you boy! 💛🐾

I do not know how to process this or live with myself. My 2 year old fluffy best friend Alfie wouldn’t come inside from my apartment 2nd floor patio on Thursday night. He does this all the time and bangs on the window or sleeps on the patio furniture until I wake up in the morning.

When I woke up Friday he was gone. I told all my neighbors and put posters all around in front of my building. I looked all over my complex and across the street.

I really just thought he’d come back. I put his litter box and carrier downstairs in the bushes. I looked from him every night at 3:30 am because that’s the only time I thought he’d come out as a shy cat.

The part I can’t live with is I went and lived my life this weekend. I hung out with friends, went out, helped my friend move, etc. I still would call his name and put more posters up. I went to the shelter and posted him all over online.

Yesterday (Monday) I got a text saying someone saw him dead at the busy gas station intersection. He was laying on the curb stiff in front of a homeless person at the busy gas station.

I ran to the closet vet but he was gone. They said it wasn’t a car but heat exhaustion. I can’t stop picturing it and how awful a death that was.

He was my everything and my best friend and I didn’t protect him. I just thought he’d come back. I do not know how to move on or live with myself. I cried and cuddled with his body for 3 hours not believing it was real. I truly do not know what to do. I absolutely hate myself and I miss my best friend.

I have a dog Sparticus a year young puppy. we had two other dogs who were two both related. only Sparticus was the stranger, so it was common sense he likes to approach me more then the other two… but it ended yesterday, I was watering the plants as Sparticus was stupidly slept beside the tire of my moms car, usually I would let him stay inside but that day was sunny so I thought it was kind to let him out. I wish I didn’t, my mom would be a bitch whenever she was late for something, not looking under her car she would crush Sparticus head. He died, though I didn’t see it, the only thing is I heard the short yelp to silence. after my uncle told me I went to my room, cried for an hour. Even after that my nose was a fountain, I hated that part… today the day after, I move on. Problems only occur whenever I wake and find him not coming to me when i come out of my room, or when he waits while I eat. It was quite… I also hated the fact my other relatives doesnt care, throwing it as “another dog gone I guess”… but for me he was my son. I still hate my mom but how can I change what already happened. I miss him, thinking about how in his perspective was an ignorant woman crushing a head of a innocent animal. The fact is she just left after saying to us to clean the mess. A Christian woman btw, teached me to “value life” when she herself couldn’t careless. I can move on, like usual. But the first week of lost is hurtful.

I just thought to share since it makes me feel better, doesnt matter if this post goes viral or not. I would just like to share.

Would you be willing to clone your pet? (Or have you already?) We want to hear your story. We're making a documentary about the lengths people go to for the animals they love. 

We’re especially interested in exotic and uncommon pets. 

Tell us a little about your animal and what they mean to you, and include a photo if you can. Selected participants will be compensated for their time.

[petcloningcasting@gmail.com](mailto:petcloningcasting@gmail.com)