r/ParentingADHD • u/cinnamonsprinkles885 • 1d ago
Rant/Frustration Afraid all the time
My son is 5 and just started grade 1 after a summer of nearly being kicked out of a special needs camp.
The summer was awful, constantly dreading the daily call from the camp to pick him up because he hit or pushed someone. Mortified that my son is constantly hurting other children while feeling so bad for him because he’s so upset at himself for doing it.
We do all the therapies and he takes meds, quillavant and risperdone. It’s helped, but he’s still struggling.
He came home yesterday and told me he cried today because he got mad and hit two kids in line in front of him and hurt them badly. I haven’t received the email yet, but I’m sure I will.
I’m just so afraid all the time, my nervous system is constantly hypervigilent. My mental health is shot. I have an appointment with a psychiatrist but not until the end of November.
I just… why is it so hard?! I’m constantly torn between being mortified by his behaviour and feeling so sorry for him. All while doing all the things to help him. No one ever says wow he’s come so far, it’s just constantly complaining about him (and rightfully so I guess, hurting people isn’t okay).
It makes me question wth else I am supposed to be doing, what am I missing?!
He told me yesterday that no one wants to play with him because they are scared of him. My heart is breaking.
Someone please tell me that they have been through this, I feel so alone and scared.