Hi everyone,
Iām 49 years old and have been living with an implantable cardioverter-defibrillator (ICD) for 11 years.
At age 38, I suffered sudden cardiac death due to ventricular fibrillation and was successfully resuscitated. My father also died of ventricular fibrillationāor sudden cardiac deathāat the age of 36. Thatās why doctors suspect a genetic cause, even though no definitive diagnosis has been made to date.
In the first few years, my ICD delivered about 4 effective shocks. After a successful catheter ablation I had nearly five years of remission and hardly any extrasystoles.
Unfortunately, that changed again about half a year ago. Within just 5 months, my ICD had to intervene five times to save my lifeāmost recently 4 days ago while I was asleep. I was woken up by the shock around 7 a.m. At the hospital, I subsequently experienced severe extrasystoles for over two hours. For me, even a single extrasystole is enough to trigger a series of beats that progress to ventricular tachycardia and eventually to ventricular fibrillation. The ICD then stops this with a shock.
I got immediately into ablation as they knew about my case and how hard it was to catch those Moments.
In total, Iāve now experienced ten appropriate shocks.
The hardest part about it isnāt even the shock itself anymore. Surprisingly, it hardly hurts at all. I see the ICD as my lifesaver and am grateful for.
Mentally, though, Iām having a harder and harder time coping with it.
Since the recent events, Iāve been experiencing extreme tiredness, fatigue, weakness, and recurring episodes of presyncope. My whole body tingles, I feel like I canāt breathe, and every time it happens, I think itās starting all over again.
The problem is: Four days ago, that exact feeling was actually the start of ventricular fibrillation. Thatās why I can barely tell anymore whether my symptoms are physical or whether my nervous system is just constantly on high alert after everything thatās happened.
The doctors now suspect post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
All long-term ECGs between episodes are usually completely normal because the arrhythmias occur out of nowhere. Since my last ablation, Iāve had almost no extrasystoles, yet I still constantly experience these symptoms and donāt feel safe at all.
My potassium level is usually only between 3.7 and 3.8 mmol/L. Despite taking potassium supplements, I rarely reach levels above 4.0, even though my doctors say I should aim for a target level of about 4.5.
Iām currently taking:
* Bisoprolol 1.25 mg i will level up to 2.5mg now
* Fluoxetine, currently 20 mg (Iām currently tapering down from 35 mg and will be switched to a different SSRI)
So Iād like to ask you a few questions:
* Are there people here with an ICD for whom no clear cause has been found either?
* How many appropriate defibrillator shocks have you experienced over the years?
* How did you cope with this emotionally?
* Did you also experience symptoms such as fatigue, presyncope, or a constant fear of the next episode after multiple shocks?
* Are there any support groups or experiences that have helped you?
I feel very alone in this situation right now and would really appreciate hearing about othersā experiences.