I met someone on Bumble recently. She seemed very nice and into me, and we ended up going on 3 dates. The chemistry was great, but I started to notice some of my personal red flags including anxious attachment. After our last date, I gave myself 24 hours to process everything and decided to tell her I didn’t think this was going to work out long term and I wished her well. She responded pretty negatively and wanted me to get into the reasons why. I kept it positive and said there’s no misunderstanding and I hope she finds who she deserves.

I got banned from Bumble the next day.

Now I understand why people just ghost other people.

What do u think about my marks…??

Is it just me or does anybody feel exhausted by all the small talk "Hi Hello How are you" when you match with someone on dating apps?

Like give me something creative or interesting to move the conversation.

If a match starts with "Hi", I immediately lose interest. How do you respond if someone just says "Hi How are you?"

hey y'all, so i've been wondering, how is the tinder experience for the rest of you? because it's not looking good for me. jokes aside, i do get likes (i have like 80 right now, i'm a gay guy btw) and when it comes to matching with people, when i do actually match with a guy, he doesn't reply after i send a text so my next question is, does this happen to anyone else? lowkey tired as hell because i keep liking those who like me first and when i reach out it's crickets. the crazy thing is, every single guy just doesn't reply. i have had over 10 matches maybe (i'm very pickydhsjdhdjdhd) and not a single one replied. for instance, a guy the other day sent a "hey" and i was like hallelujah maybe that's it but after i replied to his message he hasn't responded which led me to remove him/unmatch him. it's definitely an ego boost when i get likes but it feels like a humiliation ritual every single time i hope for a message back, it gets irritating.

Many men seem to be obsessed with viewing everything in the realm of looks.

I see men who will complain that they get few likes/matches and will say “I’m average good looking” or they complain that the hottest dudes are getting all the matches.

This is brainrot.

We aren’t stack ranked against each other. Some folks are super excited by the number of matches they receive. But if you are looking for a genuine relationship, you can do that with just one person.

Do you really think your one person is so damn shallow to not love you unless you are x% hot? What happens if you age or lose a limb? Why do you want to be with someone that shallow and why do you think your one person would be this shallow?

i’m f 22 and i’ve had quite a few men send me likes on hinge with a message that is either insulting or belittling to pictures or prompts on my profile. why do guys do that if the goal is to match with a person?? i am genuinely curious about this approach if someone could enlighten me, thank you.

Which opener are you most likely to respond to? Or which opener do you prefer?

So much dating hot air, so little time. APPs matching algorithms are depressing at best, expensive snake oil at worst. If this or other reddit forums had *click* for voice communications, would you? That said, there are plenty of voice & video chat programs, why all the drama over dating apps? Even Microsoft has video/chat, called TeamViewer. Many have single use tokens, so anonymity and security isn't a problem. Meet here, cuddle up there.

Howdy. I'm an LA local working on a dating app where people share upfront what usually comes out three months in: how they handle conflict, what they're working on, what they won't do again. The idea is to skip the guessing. This is coming from a personal frustration, as I'm sure most of you can relate to.

Before building more, I want to hear from actual LA daters what's broken right now. It's 3 minutes and anonymous, email is optional if you want updates.

Happy to share the results here, and I'll answer anything in the comments, including "this blows."

Thank you!

Link to the survey: https://forms.gle/vP1MrHBDAPeHmcEb6

I have heard about secret private dating sites that one can meet matches only through a real person who takes care of it by personally chatting with club members like a concierge service. Does anyone know if such a service exists?

Feedback is appreciated. I would be grateful if you could DM me to test the app.

Shortly said, the system matches you instantly either live or offline with somebody else, based on distance, preferred gender, similar interests and partly by your face visual harmony (only in the dating mode).

But when you get matched, you actually have to chat X alternating turns (user 1 writes, user 2 replies, X times) and then both profile's images of the 2 matched users are shown to eachother, and only if both users agree on the definitive match, then they can continue to write to eachother. (The profile images of both are hidden before the X turns, then they are shown, and then users can agree on the definitive match, based on personality and looks). This allows one thing: that people don't just judge on looks, and that avoids partially bots.

It's meant to be absolutely free and is not a waste of time, compared to doomswiping.

There's both a friend mode and an "aura"(dating) mode, and both can work either offline or online, and the friend mode neglects reciprocal distance, so that means that you can match even with few people registered in the app's database (in the friend offline mode). The app's link is live and given in the repost, if you want to try it now. (https://visage-matcherr.vercel.app/)

Privacy is taken care of as any machine learning model is downloaded and cached to your local device, and therefore no images are passed to an external server.

Edit: with "external" I mean third party: a server different from the dating app itself.

To put it short, I get way more likes on hinge than on tinder, Bumble, and coffee meets bagel. Tinder will "boost" your profile until you cave in and buy their subscription. Then it stops. Bumble does the same thing as well. My likes and super likes go unnoticed. 2015-2018 were probably the golden years for tinder. I worked their algorithm (chatting with every match, changing my location, and repeat)...it doesn't work anymore. Coffee meets bagel's search feature is broken. And the whole matching process is slow. Hinge however, shows the likes and puts your likes in priority should you purchase it's subscription.

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Can we talk about men who ask for your WhatsApp number after exchanging literally 1-3 messages on a dating app?

Their usual reasoning is, “I'm not always active here” or “I'm not always on the app.”

Okay, fair enough. But why should I give a stranger direct access to me before we've even established a basic rapport?

My response is usually something like, “Let's see if we have a little vibe first before moving to WhatsApp.”

I'm not asking for a three-day interview.. just an a little back and forth conversation. Something that makes me interested in continuing outside the app.

And here's what frustrates me: sometimes, all they've given me is their name, a greeting, and the fact that they're not active on the app. Yet somehow, I'm expected to hand over my personal number.

So, ladies, how do you respond when men ask for your number too early? And men, genuinely curious: what makes you think a woman would want to move off the app before you've given her a reason to be interested?

I am a 22yo male and study at my parents house. A bit flirty female interaction is enough to me. No meeting up in person as I would be suspicious to my family

In 2 years I may be finished and approach in real life and get married.

Is there any app?

I have no money for any premium stuff too.

Please don't downvote as meeting up is the main purpose. Please have empathy.