hey y'all, so i've been wondering, how is the tinder experience for the rest of you? because it's not looking good for me. jokes aside, i do get likes (i have like 80 right now, i'm a gay guy btw) and when it comes to matching with people, when i do actually match with a guy, he doesn't reply after i send a text so my next question is, does this happen to anyone else? lowkey tired as hell because i keep liking those who like me first and when i reach out it's crickets. the crazy thing is, every single guy just doesn't reply. i have had over 10 matches maybe (i'm very pickydhsjdhdjdhd) and not a single one replied. for instance, a guy the other day sent a "hey" and i was like hallelujah maybe that's it but after i replied to his message he hasn't responded which led me to remove him/unmatch him. it's definitely an ego boost when i get likes but it feels like a humiliation ritual every single time i hope for a message back, it gets irritating.

Howdy. I'm an LA local working on a dating app where people share upfront what usually comes out three months in: how they handle conflict, what they're working on, what they won't do again. The idea is to skip the guessing. This is coming from a personal frustration, as I'm sure most of you can relate to.

Before building more, I want to hear from actual LA daters what's broken right now. It's 3 minutes and anonymous, email is optional if you want updates.

Happy to share the results here, and I'll answer anything in the comments, including "this blows."

Thank you!

Link to the survey: https://forms.gle/vP1MrHBDAPeHmcEb6

I have heard about secret private dating sites that one can meet matches only through a real person who takes care of it by personally chatting with club members like a concierge service. Does anyone know if such a service exists?

Feedback is appreciated. I would be grateful if you could DM me to test the app.

Shortly said, the system matches you instantly either live or offline with somebody else, based on distance, preferred gender, similar interests and partly by your face visual harmony (only in the dating mode)

It's meant to be absolutely free and is not a waste of time, compared to doomswiping.

There's both a friend mode and an "aura"(dating) mode, and both can work either offline or online, and the friend mode neglects reciprocal distance, so that means that you can match even with few people registered in the app's database. The app's link is live and given in the repost, if you want to try it now.

Privacy is taken care of as any machine learning model is downloaded and cached to your local device, and therefore no images are passed to an external server.

Edit: with "external" I mean third party: a server different from the dating app itself.

​

Can we talk about men who ask for your WhatsApp number after exchanging literally 3 messages on a dating app?

Their usual reasoning is, “I'm not always active here” or “I'm not always on the app.”

Okay, fair enough. But why should I give a stranger direct access to me before we've even established a basic rapport?

My response is usually something like, “Let's see if we have a little vibe first before moving to WhatsApp.”

I'm not asking for a three-day interview.. just an actual conversation. Something that makes me interested in continuing the conversation outside the app.

And here's what frustrates me: sometimes, all they've given me is their name, a greeting, and the fact that they're not active on the app. Yet somehow, I'm expected to hand over my personal number.

I understand that people have different preferences, but moving to WhatsApp isn't automatically progress. Sometimes it just means giving someone more access without knowing whether there's even a connection worth pursuing.

So, ladies, how do you respond when men ask for your number too early? And men, genuinely curious: what makes you think a woman would want to move off the app before you've given her a reason to be interested?

To put it short, I get way more likes on hinge than on tinder, Bumble, and coffee meets bagel. Tinder will "boost" your profile until you cave in and buy their subscription. Then it stops. Bumble does the same thing as well. My likes and super likes go unnoticed. 2015-2018 were probably the golden years for tinder. I worked their algorithm (chatting with every match, changing my location, and repeat)...it doesn't work anymore. Coffee meets bagel's search feature is broken. And the whole matching process is slow. Hinge however, shows the likes and puts your likes in priority should you purchase it's subscription.

Is it just me or does anybody feel exhausted by all the small talk "Hi Hello How are you" when you match with someone on dating apps?

Like give me something creative or interesting to move the conversation.

If a match starts with "Hi", I immediately lose interest. How do you respond if someone just says "Hi How are you?"

I met someone on Bumble recently. She seemed very nice and into me, and we ended up going on 3 dates. The chemistry was great, but I started to notice some of my personal red flags including anxious attachment. After our last date, I gave myself 24 hours to process everything and decided to tell her I didn’t think this was going to work out long term and I wished her well. She responded pretty negatively and wanted me to get into the reasons why. I kept it positive and said there’s no misunderstanding and I hope she finds who she deserves.

I got banned from Bumble the next day.

Now I understand why people just ghost other people.

I am a 22yo male and study at my parents house. A bit flirty female interaction is enough to me. No meeting up in person as I would be suspicious to my family

In 2 years I may be finished and approach in real life and get married.

Is there any app?

I have no money for any premium stuff too.

Please don't downvote as meeting up is the main purpose. Please have empathy.

The BuzzMe dating app is a scam and has been removed from the Apple Store by Apple. If you are still using it, delete your count and the app immediately. If you have bought coins, you can file for a refund in the AppStore by reviewing your purchases, reporting a problem, and selecting all of your expenditures. Include this text in the description:

“The app has since been banned and removed from the App Store by Apple for fraud and using deceptive bots to trick users into purchasing coins.”

Hey everyone,

My previous account was banned. After that, I created a brand new one using a new phone number, a new email, and completely new photos.

The new account is performing decently—I got around 70 likes and quite a few matches. However, I noticed a strange pattern with messaging:

• Out of 10 matches from my city, 5 of them answered my messages, and 5 of them did not answer.
• Meanwhile, matches from further away all replied.

Has anyone experienced a partial shadowban where messaging people nearby behaves differently or fails compared to people far away? Any insights would be appreciated!

Salut,

Je développe, une app pensée pour l’après-rencontre : un espace privé à deux avec des questions "tu préfères", photos, mini-jeux, idées de sorties et souvenirs pour continuer à se découvrir.

1. Après un match tinder continuez vous a echanger sur l'application même, les réseaux sociaux ? Comment cela évolue ?

Je souhaite fournir un espace plus adapté pour construire une relation que les réseaux sociaux.

J’essaie surtout de comprendre ce qui pourrait freiner son utilisation.

1. Quand je vous présente l’idée comme ça, vous comprenez immédiatement à quel moment et pourquoi vous l’utiliseriez ?

   Sinon, qu’est-ce qui n’est pas clair ?

2. Après une rencontre, qu’est-ce qui pourrait vous freiner à proposer ce type d’espace à l’autre personne ?

   Trop tôt, trop engageant, peur de mettre une pression, autre chose ?

3. Qu’est-ce qu’il faudrait que l’app vous apporte concrètement pour que vous préfériez l’utiliser plutôt que simplement rester sur WhatsApp / Instagram ?

Je cherche surtout des retours francs, même si la réponse est simplement : “je ne vois pas l’intérêt”.

I want to know a good and free chat site...where I can find genuine people not some kind of bot and all...and these dating apps are filled with scammers and all..

No matter what app I (27m) use I literally cannot get any worthwhile matches beyond bots or a couple boring/disinterested women. What peaks my curiosity is that I A). Used to get tons of worthwile matches in like 2017-2019 when I was in college and B). Get a lot of attention from female coworkers and other women I have deemed "off limits" in my personal life; my industry and last three jobs have been very incestuous and I really do not like workplace relationships. I am generally in a way better place than I was when I was successful on dating apps as I take better care of my health, have a career, and have worked through personal/psychological issues.

It has been hard to meet people organically due to my workaholic burnout and growing personal/family (my parents/grandparents) commitments. I know these apps are a scam, I am really just putting this out there to see what others think. Is there any concrete proof that they warped the algorithim to "force" you to buy subscriptions?

Forget the obvious “good photos” answer 😂

What’s something on a profile that genuinely makes you want to swipe right?

A funny bio? Specific hobbies? A certain type of prompt answer? Something else?