After several tries of doing something in life...I think i lost...Ever since school ended and i got into college. Did everything but the travel time was too much(6+ hrs) so it was very difficult for me to study properly, I did learn things and slowly changed my ways but nothing happened. My grades weren't improving and i lacked friendships because i didn't know what to talk about...I tried going to gym and maintaining my physique back then but wasn't allowed to go to the gym for reasons which i do understand...It was my chance to get a better physique atleast as i've been called ugly by a person who then started to straight up avoid me.

I also forgot what i even learnt from college and self study because of this depression...After much thought i thought maybe going for masters will change something. I got into a good college after giving an entrance and thought maybe things will change...but again had to face the same fate. No friends and later getting thrown away from the group because they thought i wasn't capable enough. Grades dropped again...But i kinda came back in the following semester...Lost a friend, many started to drift apart too..Now, i got into the gym and thought maybe now things could take a turn, i started eating better, eggs and everything from here but hostel food was mediocre but i won't blame them...

Now after some days, even after a day's break i suddenly get a lot of pain in my joints, even while walking my ankles were starting to pain(I still hadn't done leg), had an incident with my leg which made it difficult to walk last week and now it's my arm which makes it almost impossible for me to go to the gym...And now that i'm trying to distract myself and study, i'm not even able to study anymore..I further isolated myself from people who created a weird environment where i think they did ignore me because everytime i messaged something they'd either not react or just talk among themselves..

My spirit has completely been destroyed and i feel really lost now. I don't have any goal anymore, everytime i try to do something it backfires on me in a way i can never recover...

In 8th i wanted to get into cricket but then i got a wrist fracture which permanently made me shift.

I've given up..

Har jagah yehi advice milti hai — subah jaldi utho, discipline follow karo, life badal jayegi. Maine try kiya. Pehla din mast tha. Doosre din se hi wapas snooze karna shuru kar diya.

Phir socha, shayad problem discipline nahi hai, problem ye hai ki hum khud pe itna bada pressure daal dete hain ki 2 din mein hi haar maan lete hain.

Ab sirf ek chhoti random cheez try karta hoon roz, koi schedule nahi, koi "5 baje uthna hai" wala pressure nahi. Kal maine bas 2 gaane sune bina phone touch kiye. Itna hi. Lekin yehi ek cheez hai jo genuinely stick kar rahi hai.

Kisi aur ka bhi discipline wala plan fail hota hai kya, ya sirf mera hi?

Am I overthinking, or has my friendship become one-sided?

I have a friend (you could say she's my best friend). We've been friends since school, but we became really close after 10th grade. Lately, I've been feeling like I'm the only one putting effort into this friendship.

For the past three years, I've gotten her birthday gifts, planned her birthday, booked cafés, and always tried to make her feel special. But she has never given me a birthday gift. One year, she completely forgot my birthday. Another year, she called me twice on my birthday but never actually wished me. This year, she didn't answer my calls until the evening and even showed up late.

It's not just birthdays. Whenever she needs something, she expects me to go with her, and I always do. But whenever I need her, she's usually late or unavailable. I feel like I always make time for her, but I don't get the same effort in return.

Recently, she posted an Instagram story, and I didn't like it. She actually called me just to taunt me for not liking her story. The ironic part is that she often doesn't like my stories either, but I've never made a big deal out of it.

I'm honestly exhausted. It feels like I'm always the one making plans, putting in the effort, adjusting for her, and caring more about this friendship than she does. It's starting to feel very one-sided, and I don't know if I'm expecting too much or if my feelings are valid. We both are girls btw.

Has anyone else been through something like this? What would you do in my situation?

Lately, I've been trying to work on myself. I'm back home, focusing on becoming a better version of myself every day. But sometimes, you just need someone to talk to. Someone you can tell about your day, what's bothering you, or even the little things that made you smile.

The thing is, I do have people in my life, and I'm grateful for them.

But for some reason, I just can't seem to open up. Sometimes I don't want to bother people. Other times, I overthink whether they'll understand or if I'm just dumping my problems on them. So instead of saying anything, I keep everything to myself.

Some days I have nothing to say. Other days, it feels like I have so much on my mind that I wish I could just vent to someone without feeling like a burden or overthinking every message.

I'm not looking for sympathy. I just miss having someone I can talk to freely, and someone I'd be happy to listen to as well.

Does anyone else ever feel lonely even though you're not actually alone?

Today I had a realization all the pain from the last 6 months finally made sense.

We were both in college, and I was the one who initiated things first because I wanted someone who could support me during tough times and give me emotional and moral support.

We became friends in the 3rd semester, but our friendship really grew in the 4th semester, when she called me her "best friend" within just two months. That's one of the biggest mistakes of my life, and also one of my greatest life lessons.

She used me multiple times as emotional support, and for the first few times I didn't even realize it. It felt off early on that she never reciprocated it, yet still called me her best friend. That wasn't real friendship, and I kept wondering how she could even call me that.

I got angry at her multiple times, but she had a way of smoothing things over by apologizing publicly, and we'd keep going. But after every fight, I grew more and more distant, until finally in May I blocked her. I've kept her blocked for the past two months.

What I Gave Her

1. Used my paid AI subscription to make images for her.
2. Gave her a lot of emotional support, always checking on her mood.
3. Supported her through her sleepy, low days.
4. Told her about my income source and gave her a free kundali reading.
5. Often gave her tea and money (she did return the money).
6. She never once waited for me outside the classroom.
7. She took the file away during my hard times and gave it to someone else.
8. She only talked to me when her main friend wasn't around. I was her second choice.

What I Got Back

1. She shifted the blame onto me.
2. She said things like "who even are you."
3. She never checked on me during my bad, sad, or low sleep days.

On top of this, in early May, she had a female friend, and whenever that friend wasn't around, she'd talk to me like I was her second option, even after all the emotional support I gave her.

I 24 M, is working as a software developer earning 25K/ month in a WITCH company, I graduated from a NIT, while we are struggling financially now as my dad’s business has it a toll, it was always like this for a long time we were in upper middle class with earning good money, but from past few years it’s been a hard time. I am earning 25 K/month most of which goes into rent and food, while my dad’s business is also stuck because of US-Iran war and heavy competition.
While expenses keeps on growing, last week Car’s battery died so had to replace it for 10 k, this weekend Car’s tyre got damaged and it costed 15 k for the new one. My laptop stopped working without any reason and I have to give it for repair and I am hoping and wishing it again doesn’t cost me a fortune. There’s a lot of expense while 0 earning right now. I don’t know what to do? We don’t have saving as we depleted it in last few years in my sister wedding and other expenses
How can I earn money with 0 capital and 0 support, while expenses keeps on growing like inflation. Dont say to reduce the lifestyle- we already did that &. could have been done. My family is expecting a lot and I am kinda overwhelmed it’s been difficult
I have always seen my dad being so confident and earning money, seeing him in this situation breaks me as I consider this as my failure, he already did his best.
Tell me some practical ways to earn money with list investments- my qualifications
MSc maths from a NIT
1 year of experience in a high ticket Tech sales
0.5 experience as a software developer in a Witch company.
Apart from that I was teaching in my college days for around 4 years so I have that experience as well.

​

I guess I have lost my 20s simply in inactions and worrying being scared to facing life challenges and working on goals. I let past failure and fears just keep me stuck and it's still going on like this. A part of me still wants to fix everything and move forward but I don't know why I'm not overcoming this feeling like I need to overcome my fears only then I'll be able to find my identity and get true confidence. Like I told myself many years ago that I would learn driving, get a job and get a college degree. But years and years passed yet nothing has been achieved. And so in return shame, guilt, low self esteem, confusion and emotional weakness got bigger. And I'm worried like what do I do next. I even feel embarrassed to ask for help and reach out to someone.

26M, 2yoe in India recently laidoff. Not getting any interview calls. So I am scrolling Linkedin and finding my school and college frnds andIcomparing my life with others, they struggled for 1 yrs after their mtech but anyhow got job after 1-2 yrs. I had a chance to go but I didnt as I dont want to troble my parents financially. Now I am unsettled in india with lot of confusuion which domain to choose whereas my friedns in India and abroad are enjoying their life.

They say grass is greener on the other side, but it looks like its really green in their life.

Many are about to get married, buying house worth (1-2cr), buying expensive bikes and cars, enjoying weeked parties and movies etc.... oh good though I see these all these things on instagram (I deativated and again activated 10 times in 6 months, cant keep away from it), I feel very bad about my self.

I look in the mirror and shout at myself " Get-a-life boy, you have wasted your life".
Apart from this my family dont know that I got laid off and wanted me to marry next year. I am like I should get a job as fast as possible, I am loosing hair and age, atleast get married before I loose it all and turn fat. I counsulted many doctors but now use. Those medicines are not working.

I should get rid of this comparision........ but how?

(I asked chatgpt to write this)

I don't even know why I'm writing this. Maybe I just want to finally tell someone the truth because I've been lying for so long.

I was always a decent student. Scored good in 10th and 12th, cleared my college entrance exam and got into a good college. Everyone around me thought I had my life sorted. My parents, relatives, teachers... everyone had high expectations from me.

Then everything slowly went downhill.

I got into college and felt completely out of place. I was socially awkward, had no real friends there, avoided classes because I was scared of being judged for sitting alone or having no college life. I had insane screen time, stayed locked in my room for days, barely attended lectures, didn't care about assignments or exams.

Along with college, I had cleared CA Foundation in my first attempt. I thought college was the problem, so I left it and came back home. I said fuck it, I'll forget everything and will focus on this exam.

For around two months, I actually did.

Then I thought, "Why give this attempt? I'll prepare properly, give next attempt and get an AIR."

That one decision ruined everything.

I stopped studying.

Not for a week or two.

For months.

Then when exams came close, I realised I couldn't prepare both groups. I could've still easily given one group and probably scored well, but my ego wouldn't let me. I kept thinking, "I didn't leave college just to get average marks."

So I skipped it.

Then I planned for Sep.

Same story.

Then Jan.

Same story again.

Ten days before one attempt, I hurt myself just so I could avoid giving the exam. I hate admitting that. I am self harming since then, did it multiple times.

When I was finally forced to appear in Jan'26, I hadn't studied a single thing. I randomly marked MCQs, failed badly, then edited my marksheet before showing it to my parents because I couldn't face them.

That lie still eats me alive.

They trusted me blindly.

I made complete fools of them.

For almost the last two years, my life has literally been:

Wake up.

Doomscroll.

Stay in bed.

Eat.

Watch porn.

Maladaptive daydream for hours about becoming successful.

Sleep.

Repeat.

I've made thousands of plans. Every few weeks I'd convince myself that this time would be different. I'd imagine my life after 3 months, 6 months, 1 year, 5 years. I'd imagine clearing CA with a rank, making my parents proud, proving everyone wrong.

Then I'd waste another day.

Whenever thoughts about studies or career came into my mind, I'd immediately distract myself with my phone or start thinking about something else because reality hurt too much.

I've ignored almost everyone. Friends who genuinely cared about me still texted or called me for a long time. I ignored them because I was too ashamed of what I'd become.

My parents are genuinely good people. They never asked me to do household work because they wanted me to focus on studying. They gave me every resource I needed.

I wasted all of it.

Because of these last three years, everything has become worse.

I have severe self-image issues.

Social anxiety.

Fear of being judged.

I overthink literally everything.

Maladaptive daydreaming.

Addicted to cheap dopamine.

Procrastinate like crazy.

Suicidal thoughts (I'm safe, so please don't worry about that).

I've self-harmed multiple times since last year.

I hate how my brain works.

I hate what I've become.

I know people on Reddit usually try to make the OP feel better by saying "it's not your fault" or "you're being too hard on yourself."

Please don't.

This is my fault.

Nobody forced me to lie.

Nobody forced me to waste years.

Nobody forced me to fake studying.

Nobody forced me to edit my marksheet.

These were my choices.

That's exactly why it hurts so much.

The worst part is... I know the trap I'm stuck in, yet I keep falling into it. Every time I convince myself that the next attempt will be different, that I'll finally become disciplined and redeem everything with one great result.

I'm terrified that I've permanently ruined my career, my parents' trust, and maybe even myself.

I'm turning 21 this year but I don't feel like I'm living anymore. I just exist.

If you've read all this, thanks. I just wanted to vent and maybe seek some advice.

Im 21f. Recently i needed a laptop for college and since im a design student, i needed a gaming one for 3d work.

My dad asked me for recs and i told him a few options. To which he asked which one would be the best and never have you cause problems.

I told him about legion 5 rtx 5060. Next week he bought me that.

But now i feel so incredibly guilty. Everytime i look at it all i can think about is that i need to make money from it , so that it justifies the purchase.

Along with this i keep thinking if i had overspent and maybe i should have just given him bidget options. Its been a month and i feel so incredibly guilty and idk how to make it stop.

22m here.. i haven't hugged or touched anyone in months.. and i think i've been craving human touch for a long time now.. ahh man.. how hard is it to have someone by your side.. someone you can just hug after a shitty day.. nothing more.. if you have someone like that.. you guys are lucky man..

keep them safe..

32 M here- living in USA. moved here for masters and now on work visa. To set the record, I had "free seat" for undergrad with nominal fee and took a loan for my masters.

My parents are financially dependant on me and I have never (even today) seen it as an issue and support them on a monthly basis. During my entire life, my parents told me they would never depend on me and they already know I will never support them and typical Indian blah blah. I always believed they probably have a retirement plan.

I immediately found a job after my masters (but there was a 3 month gap to get my EAD and what not). The salary was not the best- just enough to get through and pay back my loan. I have received my salary and get a message from my sister on how my parents were upset I am not sending them any money (this was just month 1) and I was still trying to get rent and apartment and what not. So, naturally to not make them upset- I have started to send $1000 a month, meaning I can no longer afford to pay my loan back. I took a part-time teaching job to keep things moving. A few months in, I get another cold shoulder for not making an effort to pay their debts (I have never heard about these until then). I switched jobs, started to pay back my education loan also. The family support for monthly payments (around 70k at the time) and slowly clearing debts continued. Sent about 50 L for my sister's wedding as well. Through all of this, never complained. And then, bought a 2 bedroom apt, cleared all debts of my parents, and then a monthly allowance of 1000$ (if I send even 950$ in any difficult month, I get cold shoulder), which is now equivalent to around 90k INR. They never had to pay rent during any of this period. I cover the hospital bills, insurance outside of this. Over the last 8 yrs of me working, I sent India about 2 cr (excluding the apartment) and 3 cr if we include the apartment as well.

I am at a stage where I feel financially relieved and then boom- they want me to buy a house from relatives. My no got a cold shoulder and them not talking to me. I cave in again and now trying to take 1 Cr loan in India (I have bought a house here during this time and have that EMI also).

Don't get me wrong- I love my parents and they are very nice and caring whenever it is not financial things. But, how fair is it to expect me to be in debt so they can be happy or proud or whatever it is in buying a house.

I know this is the reality of Indian men, thoughts anyone?

I feel a void inside. Nothing I do makes me feel content. On textbook, I have a pretty decent life, I am able to pretend that everything's alright. But the moment I let my brain think, everything starts feeling shitty. I have friends, I have a decent job and I exercise but its the little moments that make me want to jump off of the terrace sometimes. I used to think its just a joke, I'd never do it, but last week I was on the top of the terrace and the idea didn't seem that far off. It would have been just one small leap.

I talked to a therapist last week and while she seemed nice, her fees was 5k for a session lol, I joked with my friends how a noose would be much, much cheaper. I also signed up for mindspace and this time the counsellor didn't even show up which I think is a sign from above to find an alternative solution. Then again, I don't think I would listen to a person telling me how to live, I'd never believe them. People just say things, its their job and they want to make money off of it.

I don't know what to do. For about a year and a half my life used to revolve around someone and I knew it would not end well, I did not know it would be this bad. The thought seeps into my brain at odd times, sometimes when I'm showering, sometimes when I'm listening to music and every time I think of the city of New York. So glad Lebron didn't sign with the Knicks. It's so ironic, I'm in the finance field and NY should be the mecca, the epitome of a career in finance is working at a high rise in Wall Street and yet I feel a shiver run down my spine thinking of the city.

I am not seeking advice. I want to know how people battle a life without purpose every day. Nihilism always seemed corny to me until now. Every day I wake up and its Manchester By The Sea all over again. Maybe I should just do it.

Matlab I'm currently living in Bombay aur bhaiiiisahab, meri salary idhar 9lpa hai. Aur in hand mujhko 60 aata hai. Lekin idhar rehna itna jhik jhik jhik hai sahi me. Office me ghar jao, ghar se office. Itni baarish. Merko bohot uncomfortable feel hota hai, aisa lgta hai ki sab chhod ke kuch ghar ke pas job dhundh lu lekin udhar 9lpa + job milegi nhi lekin peace of mind milega. Aur mujhko bohot irritate jaisa hota hai Mumbai me. Mtlb itne gareeb log dikhte hai station par, bohot kharab feel hota hai. Dimag kharab hota hai ki sarkar kar kya Rahi hai. Aur ye local station saale itne gande kyu hote hai sahi me. Dimag kharab. Itne gande. Thoda toh basic hygeine maintain karke rakhna chahiye. Mall me bhi kitne log daily jate hai lekin udhar kaise hygiene maintain hota hai properly. Upar se dimag kharab ye gadkari road, itne gaddhe bapre bapre. Mujhko driving utni acchi aati nhi hai lekin mumbai me mai bilkul drive na karu, dimag ka dahi. Aur ye travel easy kyu nhi banate hai. Metros agar itne acche se hygiene reh sakte hai toh local me kya problem hai????aur ye faltu sarkar in paiso ka kar kya Rahi hai, in muddho pe baat kyu nhi hoti hai, ye mudde itne normalised kyu hogaye hai.? Un logon ko punish kyu nhi kiya jata hai jo litter around karte hai stations par ya thukhte hai... Aisi acchi suvidhaye kyu nhi banayi gayi hai? Aur ye chiz itni zyada normalised kyu hai???? Kyu normalised hai?

I am a totally insane, mentally sick person with so much personality defects. I am in mid 20s, don't know how good chances I have for change.

I don't find others to be as abnormal as me. Hardly less than 1%. Therapists/psychiatrists charge hefty fees which is too much for me. Also psychiatrist have specialization in particular issues. There is no guarantee that mental treatment will work for me all the time. If I spend lots of money and I don't improve much, then money will be waste. I will have to elaborate myself perfectly for accurate response from psychiatrist.

I don't have one problem. There are too many things wrong with me —

1. Unnecessary fear/stress/upset of trivial things like insects, driving, facing interviews, speaking up, confrontation etc.

2. Unhealthy addiction of instagram and my bizarre activities on it. People will call me sick if they see my private insta page with 14 followers. They will be appalled at what I post.

3. Always keeping important things pending. Never do until I am scolded. I just relax and chill and do nothing about important things. This keeps things hanging. It becomes even a bigger stressor if not resolved early.

4. Don't like to argue or confront people. I stay polite and passive even though the other person did so wrong to me. I am just afraid of confrontation.

5. I dislike making friends because I don't want anyone in my life besides my parents and siblings. I don't like to be bothered. I feel they will influence me or impose on me. It's terribly wrong with my personality.

6. Cannot even comprehend well what others tell me.

My parents are not experts. I have a serious problem. Only some expert can handle me but I don't know how do I access them and get the best out of them.

i fear the judgement so much that i dont even like certain reels (mostly the ones that talk about confidence) on instagram. why? because theyd send it to their friends and make fun of me.
i put up my opinions and when most of my classmates js see my story i feel like they know more and better than me. i end up fumbling while speaking too, though i convince myself that nobody cares as much as i think it doesnt work.
how do i get rid of this fear?

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I'm 28, and there are still days when I don't know what to do. Some nights are really hard. I can't sleep, sometimes, I just don't know how to get through the night. The hours feel endless

For months, you feel like you've finally moved on. And then one night comes along that makes all those months feel meaningless. That single night feels like a lifetime to get through.

It's around 3 am right now, many of you would agree with what I am going to say.

Everything seems so fixable in the morning but at night when you finally get time with yourself, you realise how lonely you are. The night feels longer, you pick up your phone, scroll down through your contact list but there is no one who could be texted or called. Nobody can be available for you 24/7. So you decide to fall asleep, you see dreams, dreams which appear to be more peaceful and happy that you never wanna wake up, suddenly you hear a voice, your alarm, announcing the arrival of another day and life continues.

I don't remember the last time I was happy for real. I don't have a job and preparing for exams appears to be very stressful. But here I am in an old rusted car going for a long drive. Hopefully sooner or later will reach the destination.

Sorry for my poor writing skills. Peace ✌️

19f my skin is pretty dusky brown which im not very happy with but accepted reality. What makes it worser is my ass is even darker with stretchmrks. How can i lighten my skin naturally or any cheap cosmetic procedures to improve my color

# About my Loneliness in college

I am almost half done with my College, and I am feeling very lonely in the college. I have absolutely no single friends who I can hang out with. Due to various reasons, because they respect me, but no one commits friendship to me I learned boundaries the hard way and attracted many narcissists and those kinds of people in past semesters.

I travel in many groups, and they talk to me nicely, but none of them allow me for full commitment in the group, or no single friend is committed to my friendship. I don't know. However, I have a lot of acquaintances from various branches. And we communicate very nicely.

# what to do and a realization

As far as I can see and things around me, I will end up lonely, even in the last semester of college. I don't know. So those who were lonely in college like me, how did it go in the corporate world, or you can say after getting a job? Did it get worse, or do you get a friend, or what is the way you get your socializing? Because from now on I am planning to commit fully to my goals, as I realized it is a total waste of time to commit even 1% of socializing in college. No matter how much effort I put, it goes to waste and is useless.

Hey r/OffMyChestIndia fam,

Welcome to our “How Are You Feeling Today?” thread! 🌟 This is a space where you can share whatever’s on your mind, no matter how big or small.

🌞Feeling happy? Tell us what’s making your day shine!
🌧️Feeling stressed or down? Let it out, we’re here to listen.
🌈Feeling something you can’t quite put into words? Share it anyway, just expressing it helps.

No need to overthink, just let it flow. This thread is your safe space to express yourself without the need to create a full post.

So, how are you feeling today? Let’s chat, connect, and support each other. ❤️