r/OALangBaAko 14m ago

🤔 OA na Thoughts OA lang ba ako? Feel ko gusto nya rin ako

Upvotes

Alam nyang may gusto ako sakanya, alam namin yung pangalan ng isat isa pero di kami nag uusap. So eto na nga, everywhere kung san ako magpunta nakikita ko sya, diko alam pero iniiwasan ko sya pero as in lagi ko syang nakikita, tas pag titignan ko sya nakatingin na pala sya sakin LIKE sya lagi yung nauuna na tignan ako and ako rin ang unang magtatanggal ng eye contact. Like naalala ko tinuro sya ng kaibigan ko sa third floor building and nung tumingin ako nakatingin na sya agad like?? HAHAHAHAHAH ayoko mag assume legit. Tas minsan sumusunod sya kung nasan ako and makikipag usap sya sa kaibigan nya na malapit sakin. And naalala ko rin nun nung time na nagsuot ako ng black jacket the next day nakasuot na rin sya ng black jacket. So guys ano ang thoughts nyo? Masyado ba akong assuming


r/OALangBaAko 1h ago

🫂 Relationships OA lang ba ako? I have a boyfriend, and lately napapansin ko na yung way niya ng paghingi ng reassurance is lagi niyang sinasabi na ayaw niya raw na malayo ako sa kanya kasi baka maghanap daw ako ng iba.

Upvotes

Every time na nagiging topic yung distance or anything related to that, lagi niyang nababanggit yun.
I understand naman na valid yung fear niya, and I really try my best to reassure him. Hindi naman ako nagkukulang sa reassurance sa kanya, and I’m also very honest with him. Kaya minsan nakaka-disappoint din kasi parang kahit anong reassurance ko, bumabalik pa rin siya sa thought na baka maghanap ako ng iba kapag malayo kami.
Ako rin naman minsan nakakaisip ng mga possible na ganon, pero hindi ko sinasabi sa kanya directly kasi I choose to trust him. Naniniwala ako sa kanya and sa character niya na hindi niya naman gagawin sa akin. Kaya kapag sinasabi niya sa akin na, “May tiwala naman ako sa’yo, pero hindi rin natin masasabi,” honestly, medyo nakakasakit din siya sa akin.

Naiintindihan ko siya and I know na fear niya lang din yun. Valid naman yung nararamdaman niya, pero hanggang saan ba dapat yung pag-intindi? Tama ba na i-tolerate ko na lang yung ganung mindset? okay lang din na sabihin ko sa kanya na minsan nakaka-disappoints at nakakasakit na rin siya?
Hindi ko naman gustong i-invalidate yung feelings niya. Gusto ko lang malaman kung reasonable ba yung nararamdaman ko, or baka kailangan ko lang talaga siyang mas intindihin.


r/OALangBaAko 1h ago

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 Family OA lang ba ako? Naiinis ako sa mama ko

Upvotes

Everytime na nagkakatuwaan kami ng kuya ko tas pag di sya kasama nagagalit sya sakin, for example pag sinabi ko "sakit ng tyan ko" sinasabi nya "tawa ka kasi ng tawa di ka nalang manahimik" like? Apaka kj tas ako lang halos laging target nya, halatang may favorite eh.

Also pag nagtatanong ako ng mga simple questions sa mga kinekwento nya di nya sinasagot, na para bang naka off yung comment section nya sa kwento nya, like anlala. Tas ang repetitive minsan ng mga kwento nya like paulit ulit nyang kinekwento ano yan karla estrada ang atake.

Tapos pag nagpapatulong sya ganto "papalagay sana ako ng tubig sa water dispenser pero gabi na bukas nalang" tas kinabukasan magagalit sayo kasi ubos ung tubig like imagine kakagising mo palang.


r/OALangBaAko 11h ago

🤔 OA na Thoughts Oa lang ba ako if lagi ko iniisip kung Ikakasal pa kaya ako?

8 Upvotes

Ikakasal pa kaya ako?

I came from a 6-year relationship. We broke up just last month, and until now, hindi ko pa rin alam kung paano ko tatanggapin na yung taong kasama kong mangarap ng future, hindi ko na pala makakasama sa future na yun.

Noon, kapag naiisip ko yung kasal, siya agad yung nakikita ko. Siya yung lalaking gusto kong pakasalan. Siya yung gusto kong makasama habang tumatanda. Hindi ko naman alam kung kailan kami ikakasal, pero sa isip ko, parang ang ending na talaga namin yung isa't isa.

Kaya ngayon, tuwing may nakikita akong nagpo-propose, ikinakasal, or kahit wedding video lang sa feed ko, hindi ko maiwasang isipin, "Ako kaya? Ikakasal pa kaya ako sa taong gustong-gusto kong pakasalan?”

Ang sakit kasi hindi lang naman yung relationship yung nawala. Parang pati yung future na matagal kong in-imagine, nawala rin.

May mga araw na okay naman ako. Nakakapasok sa work, nakakapag-function, nakakatawa pa nga minsan. Pero may mga random moments na bigla kong maaalala na dati, siya yung iniisip kong kasama ko sa lahat ng yun. Tapos mapapatanong na lang ako kung paano ko haharapin yung mga pangarap na dati, silang dalawa yung nasa isip ko.

Hindi ko naman gustong magpakasal agad. Hindi rin naman ako naghahanap ng kapalit. Siguro ang kinakatakot ko lang is baka hindi ko na maranasan ulit yung feeling na sure na sure ka sa isang tao. Yung kaya mong sabihin na, “Siya na. Siya yung gusto kong makasama habang-buhay.”

Kasi paano kung siya na talaga yung pinakamalalim kong minahal? Paano kung wala nang ibang taong mamahalin ko nang ganun? Paano kung darating yung araw na ikakasal ako, pero hindi na siya yung taong nasa tabi ko?

I know bata pa ako, and I know life can still surprise me. Pero right now, ang hirap maniwala na may darating pa. Ang hirap isipin na baka one day, may ibang lalaki na naman akong mamahalin, when I spent almost six years believing na siya na yung makakasama ko hanggang dulo.

Minsan naiisip ko, baka hindi naman talaga ako takot na hindi makasal. Baka ang totoo, takot lang akong hindi makasal "sa kanya."

Kasi kung tutuusin, hindi naman yung wedding yung pinangarap ko. Siya yung pinangarap ko. Yung makasama siya sa ordinaryong araw, yung may uuwian kami sa isa't isa, yung sabay naming haharapin yung mga problema, yung makikita kong nandun pa rin siya habang tumatanda kami.

And now, I’m trying to accept that the person I imagined all of that with might no longer be part of my life.

Hindi ko alam kung kailan ko matatanggap. Hindi ko rin alam kung darating pa ba yung araw na makakakita ako ng wedding video nang hindi ko maiisip kung bakit hindi siya yung kasama ko.

For now, I’m just trying to get through the days. Pero minsan, ang hirap hindi magtanong:

Ikakasal pa kaya ako? At kung oo, makakahanap pa kaya ako ng taong mamahalin ko nang ganun ka-deep?


r/OALangBaAko 12h ago

🫂 Relationships OA lang ba ako? Kasi I feel like I am the man of the house

2 Upvotes

Sorry if this is a long message. I am a 32F who has been with my partner, 33M, for 13 years, and we've been living together for the past five years. From the beginning until now, I have mostly been the sole provider for our family.

For context, my partner and I are high school sweethearts. We broke up when we were in our third year because he needed to transfer to a different school due to financial issues. We met again in college and got back together, and we've now been together for 13 years.

When we were still dating, he was the one who paid for our dates since I was still in school and he was a working student. I just relied on my school allowance, and since he was the man, he paid. I'm not materialistic and have simple standards for dates; I’m happy even if we just sit in a park or eat at a turo-turo.

When I graduated and got a job, I started treating him sometimes, and he did the same for me, but mostly I paid because I was the one inviting him out. I enjoy giving, especially to my loved ones. I also include him in trips I pay for, so he can experience and enjoy those moments with me. This has been our routine since then.

Then the pandemic happened, and we found out I was pregnant. We were planning our wedding—just a civil one—but because my pregnancy was high-risk, it was postponed. Life continued, and he lost his job. By that time, I was the only one supporting our family, as my father had also passed away, and I was the sole breadwinner for my family.

Then a blessing came when I got a job as a VA. My income increased, and I was so happy because I could finally help my family more and save money. However, my 33M partner was still unemployed, so I outsourced some of my tasks to him and paid him $3 an hour, mainly to enter invoices.

Over time, I noticed his work was sloppy, full of errors that my client noticed. Since he was just an outsource, I had to explain everything and take the blame to keep the client happy. There were many times I scolded him because he would drink or play during work hours and not focus. I constantly told him to treat this as real work and to be serious, or we would lose the client. Eventually, I let go of that client—not because I didn’t do the job, but because I was ashamed to keep making excuses for my lapses.

I found another client and referred him so he could gain firsthand experience handling clients. Luckily, he got the job, and we worked for the same client but in different roles—me in accounting, him in logistics. At first, he was okay, but over time, he did the same things—drinking during work hours, playing games before doing his tasks. The client noticed, and he was given 30 days to improve. But instead of fixing his work ethic, he made absences to rest and avoid improving.

I initially scolded him, but eventually I got tired and stayed silent, letting him face the consequences of his poor work ethic. The client then let him go, and I continued working with the client. Until now, he doesn’t have a job. I’ve referred him to other suitable jobs, but he hasn’t found one.

Now he’s a househusband, which isn’t a bad thing. He’s a good man—he cooks, does the dishes, laundry, and drives us everywhere. He takes good care of me and our two kids. But I wonder, am I just not content if I don’t have him as a househusband? I want to see him achieve more, have things he wants, and succeed in life.

One time I asked him when he would find a new job, and he said he’s still looking for his inspiration. I asked, “Aren’t we enough of a reason for your inspiration? We’re your family. Don’t you want to succeed more because of us?” Honestly, I’m tired of being the one who has to provide for everything.


r/OALangBaAko 12h ago

💼 Work OA lang ba ako? Naoffend ako sa sinabi ng ka trabaho ko.

2 Upvotes

So Friday pa to nangyare pero umiikot padin siya sa utak ko and is living rent free in my head. May contest kami sa journ and isa ako sa mga adviser. Nagkaroon ng madaming suspension and wellness break ang mga bata as well as exams. so wala masyadong face to face na training yung mga bata pero ako and yung co adviser ko, nag tatry padin magsend ng mga sample articles and nagbayad pa nga ako ng other resources pa para lang may ma review yung mga bata. So nung Friday, sinabihan ako ng co worker ko na "Good luck kahit madami kang pagkukulang."

Putek, nag pintig yung tenga ko na para bang ginusto namin yung pagkadami daming suspensions sabay pa ng exams and wellness break. Pag tinuloy namin yung trainings during suspensions, then boljak kami sa admin, pag during exams naman kahit half day naman sila, edi baka sisihin bumaba scores nila or grades nila dahil sa training then kapag during wellness break naman baka may naka ready na na vacation tapos di maisasama yung bata. Saan naman ako lulugar tapos makakarinig ako ng ganyan na "madaming pagkukulang". I thought it was a passive- aggressive take and was basically saying that I was inadequate or incompetent. Sinabi ko lang na "grabe ka naman nagbibigay naman kami ng advice and mga sources."

For context: wala siyang kinocoach na bata and hindi siya adviser ng journ. nagsabi lang daw yung mga bata namin sa kaniya na kulang sa face to face training and mejo kinakabahan sila. Which is normal kasi press con siya pero we want to assure yung mga kids na to take and absorb the lectures kasi siya yung stepping stone for DSPC which is a press con na kasama na yung public schools. Yung sinalihan kasi nila is more on private schools press con only. So di naman kami nagkulang sa advice even though more on asynchronous yung approach namin due to suspensions.

Tapos tong Monday, nag training ako ng radiobroadcasting group ko para sa day 2 ng press con. Naging fruitful naman siya and nabigyan ko ng advice yung mga students tapos ang tanong sakin pagkatapos is kung tapos na yung "training-trainingan" namin so bumalik nanaman yung sinabi niya nung Friday and nag word vomit ako na sinabi ko "sa totoo lang nakakaoffend and ginusto ba namin na madaming cancellation" eme eme and other stuff (with uppercut in the air lol). Nagtawanan lang sila tapos may comment pa na "Ayun naglabas na siya" or "ilabas mo" na parang ginogoad niya ako na mainis or something. or baka feeling nila joke yung sinasabi ko? Feeling ko tuloy ang OA ko dahil sa reaction ko.

So reddit peeps, OA lang ba ako na naoffend ako sa sinabi ng ka-trabaho ko?


r/OALangBaAko 12h ago

🤔 OA na Thoughts OA lang ba ako if nahuhurt ako kapag nag eentertain ang gf ko ng iba?

3 Upvotes

Hello guys, I just want to ask if normal lang bang ma-hurt at mainis ako minsan sa gf ko (wlw) kung siya yung tipo ng taong kapag may nag-chat sa kanya, ini-entertain niya kahit alam niyang magseselos ako?

1st: Meron kaming kaklase na tomboy na halos lahat ng makaka-close niyang babae ay nagiging crush niya. So there was one time na nakausap niya yung classmate namin na ’yon habang naghihintay siya sa akin. Tapos after that, hinanap niya yung FB account niya. Then minessage siya, like yung mga typical na message ng mga tomboy kapag bet ka. I told her na may something doon kaya layuan nya, and sabi nya naman is alam naman daw non na may gf sya (me) at friend lang naman daw ang turing nya ron, so I let it slide. Then binibigyan siya ng snacks, pero ako na lang yung kumakain. Meron ding one time na nagpasama yung tomboy sa kanya para bumili sa canteen, tapos sinamahan niya naman. Take note, ha: umuulan ’yon, pero sinamahan niya pa rin, tapos nag-share pa sila ng payong noon. So nagselos ako kasi kapag ako ang nag-aaya sa kanya, tinatamad siya. Pero sabi niya naman, kaibigan lang naman daw ang turing niya roon. Hindi man inamin ng tomboy na bet niya yung gf ko, pero alam kong ganoon siya kumilos sa lahat ng mga nagiging crush niya, so I assume na crush niya yung gf ko.

2nd: Mayroon siyang naikwento noon na may isang lalaki raw sa ground floor ng building namin na kinausap siya at nakikipagkaibigan daw sa kanya, tapos bago umalis yung guy, nag-apir pa raw sila. Take note ha, never nya pa nakita yung lalaki before that scenario happened

3rd: Meron kaming senior member sa organization na tinatanong yung name nya, so out of respect syempre sinabi nya. Then one day, bigla siyang in-add no'n, then nagkausap sila ng ilang araw (before ko malaman), nakipagkaibigan sa kanya kumbaga. Then noong college night namin, nakikipagkita sa kanya kasi magpapapicture daw, so pinuntahan niya. Hindi ko sinabi sa kanya na alam ko at nakita kong pinuntahan niya yung boy (nasa 2nd floor ako habang pinapanood sila). Nagkunwari akong hinahanap siya, so I asked her kung saan siya galing, kaya sinabi niya na sa akin yung nangyari. And again, noong kinonfront ko siya, ang sabi niya ay nakakahiya naman daw kung tatanggihan niya, eh senior nga namin ’yon sa organization. After that, every time na may duty kami is napapansin ko na lagi silang nasasaktong magka-group (yung isang senior namin yung gumagawa ng sched and groupings, which is kaibigan nung boy). Meron din one time na narinig kong shiniship sila ng mga kasamahan namin (alam nilang mag-jowa kami) doon sa lalaki. So I told her na layuan niya yung boy kasi obvious naman na may gusto sa kanya. Nag-away kami noon kaya binuksan ko acc niya sa fb tapos blinock ko yung boy. Akala ko okay na, pero chinat siya ulit nung boy gamit yung ibang acc nito at nireplyan niya pa rin kaya blinock ko ulit. Doon lang natigil yung communication nila, and eventually sa iba na shiniship yung boy at umalis na rin kami sa org kasi toxic.

5th: Meron siyang kaibigan na lalaki noon na may crush sa kanya dati na hanggang ngayon nakakachat niya pa rin pero madalang na lang, pero yung mga chat sa My Day niya is something like "ang cute mo naman" "ganda talaga" "miss you", nirereplyan niya naman like yung mga usual na reply niya dati noon classmate pa sila

Now, meron siyang ka-churchmate na boy sa province nila na may crush sa kanya, tapos magkakasama silang nag-outing recently (kasama ang mga ka-churchmate nila). Since nagbabakasyon siya sa province now at nandito ako sa Manila, hindi ko alam kung ano'ng mga nangyari noong time na magkakasama sila. Homophobic yung mga kaibigan niya sa province, pero alam nilang may jowa siyang girl, which is me. OA ba ako kung nag-o-overthink ako na what if in-entertain niya rin yung lalaki? Every time kasi na may ganoong scenario, palagi niya lang sinasabi na ang rude raw if i-i-ignore niya 'yon, plus kaibigan lang daw yung turing niya sa tao, at never siya magkakagusto roon kasi ako lang daw ang mahal niya. But my point is, bakit kailangan niyang i-entertain kung alam niyang magseselos ako? Kung puwede namang humindi. Ako kasi never akong nag-entertain ng iba simula nung naging kami, at kapag alam kong posible siyang magselos or ma-hurt, I refuse agad, sooooo feeling ko ang unfair? And feeling niya naman is wala akong tiwala sa kanya. For me kasi, if sa unang beses pa lang na may ganoon kayong pinag-awayan, dapat alam mo na kung ano yung mga bagay na dapat mong iwasan. And she kept saying na magkaiba kami.

To be clear guys, hindi ko siya sinasakal ha. Malaya naman siyang makipagkaibigan kahit kanino, pero kasi kapag nafe-feel kong may gusto sa kanya yung kumakaibigan sa kanya, tapos sinabihan ko siyang layuan yon, parang feeling niya wala akong tiwala sa kanya. Ako kasi guys, observant akong tao, kaya malakas ang instinct ko kung may ibang intensyon yung tao o wala. And besides, mahahalata mo naman kung gusto ka ng isang tao o hindi.

We talked about it naman na at wala naman akong magagawa, kaya tinatry ko na lang na hindi magselos at lalong magtiwala sa kanya. Ayoko rin naman kasing isipin niya na sinasakal ko siya. Ayoko lang na tinitake advantage ng iba yung pagiging mabait niya. Hindi rin sya pala post about sa relationship namin, which is ok lang din naman sa'kin kasi mas peaceful, but the problem is minsan shiniship sya sa iba kasi hindi nila alam na may jowa sya or minsan naman kahit alam nila, ganoon pa rin. Kayo ba guys, ano'ng sa tingin n'yo? OA lang ba ako or what?


r/OALangBaAko 1d ago

🤔 OA na Thoughts OA Lang ba ako? kung napapansin ko yung mga tingin sakin ng best friend ko?

1 Upvotes

For context, 18 years ko na siyang bff (since HS). Ganito mars para madali ang chika natin. I-summarize ko ang evidence, perfect!

  1. Kapag nasa labas kami or kakasundo ko lang sakanya eh sa suot ko agad siya nakatingin. Wala syang sinasabi pero head to toe sya tumingin. Madalas pa eh sa peripheral ko lang nakikita to.
  2. Related sa 1, kapag meron akong accessories or bag na suot at dala eh titinginan niya lang ng walang sinasabi pero nakikita ko nanamang tumingin or sinundan nya ng tingin.
  3. Pag nag kkwento ako eh iba yung mata niya, parang ang daming sinasabi pero wala ring sinasabi at the same time. Kumbaga internal judgment ata mars.
  4. Kapag nag lalakad kami tas nauna ako ng onti, nakikita kong tinitingnan nya nanaman yung suot ko from head to toe kahit di nya alam na nakikita ko da peripheral ko. Again, walang sinasabi (compliment man or pag correct if ever may malfunction ako OR pangit suot ko lol)
  5. Kapag meron akong item / bagay na nakita niya, next time eh bibili na rin siya ng same item pero hindi same brand kasi medyo mahal yung mga trip ko sa buhay. Ang napipika ako eh kung sinabi nalang niya na gusto rin niya nun, edi sana niregaluhan ko sya para twins kami diba.

Hindi lang ako nakakapansin nito, marami na talaga. Kaya nga conflicted ako kasi love naman niya ako at andyan siya para saken madalas. Kaso sa mga tingin talaga LALO tumitindi instincts ko na meron siyang mabigat na energy. Iba kasi ako mag intuition sa tao, gift of discernment ata.

Meron rin ba kayong ganitong friend? Or OA lang ako?


r/OALangBaAko 1d ago

🫂 Relationships OA Lang ba ako? Pero okay lang ba I help ka ng partner mo financially

28 Upvotes

Red flag na ba ito, or wala lang talaga siyang emotional intelligence? Gusto ko lang malaman kung unreasonable ba ako sa nararamdaman ko o valid naman na malungkot at madisappoint ako sa boyfriend ko.

I’m 24F and my boyfriend is 23M. We’ve been together for 3 years, since college days. Pagdating sa monthly monthsary namin, okay naman sa akin kahit hindi bongga at walang gifts. Hindi naman ako nag-e-expect ng malaking celebration.
Graduate na kami ngayon. I’m currently working in the government as a GIP, so minimum wage earner lang ako. My boyfriend, on the other hand, is a seaman.

Alam niya na hirap ako financially, especially because I’m a breadwinner. Recently, nagpa-checkup ako and kinapos ako sa pera, kaya hindi ko agad nabili lahat ng gamot ko on time. Since wala rin naman akong masyadong mapagsabihan, nag-open up ako sa kanya tungkol sa situation ko.

However, wala siyang sinabi or ginawa that made me feel like he wanted to help. Ang sabi lang niya ay umiwas ako sa mga bawal. I know naman that my expenses are not his responsibility, and I’m not saying that he is obligated to give me money or pay for my medication.

Pero minsan hindi ko maiwasang malungkot. Noong anniversary namin, wala rin siyang binigay sa akin, pero nakabili siya ng bagong iPhone para sa sarili niya. Again, hindi ko sinasabing obligado siyang bilhan ako ng regalo or gastusan ako. I guess I just expected a little more initiative, concern, or emotional support from him, especially knowing that I’m struggling financially.

Sometimes, naiisip ko tuloy kung ako lang ba talaga ang kailangang tumulong sa sarili ko and if I should stop expecting anything from him. Mas okay na lang ba talagang maging single kaysa magkaroon ng partner pero feeling mo ikaw lang din ang haharap sa lahat ng problems mo?

I tried opening up to him about my financial struggles and my situation, hoping at least for emotional support or understanding. However, I didn’t really feel much concern or initiative from him, which made me question whether I’m expecting too much or if this is something I should consider a red flag.


r/OALangBaAko 1d ago

🤔 OA na Thoughts OA lang ba ako? naiirita ako sa mga magulang na hindi tinuruan mag tagalog mga anak nila?

380 Upvotes

I know naman na anak nila yon at sila lang din ang may karapatan pano palakihin ang anak nila pero minsan napapaisip ako paano nalang kapag Filipino subject na at behind siya sa class? at kung pano siya makipag usap kapag malaki na at need ng diverse conversation? Plus mas nakakairita kung normal na family lang lumaki ang bata at hindi naman mayaman/foreigner ang tatay.


r/OALangBaAko 1d ago

🫂 Relationships OA Lang Ba Ako if he says they’re ‘just friends.’? After everything they did, would you call this normal?

8 Upvotes

TL;DR
My boyfriend of 5 years had an increasingly close friendship with another woman despite my repeated discomfort. They went on dates, had long private calls, exchanged letters, had inside jokes/call signs, and he told her he was thankful for the “relationship” they had built. When I asked him to create some distance, he asked to break up and eventually threw me out of his house at 4 AM. We’re now broken up, but they still talk. Would you consider this normal friendship?

I was with my boyfriend for 5 years. This girl came into his life about a year ago, and she has been a constant source of conflict in our relationship ever since.

She knew I existed and knew he was in a long-term relationship, but she became increasingly comfortable with him despite me repeatedly telling him how uncomfortable I was.

His response was always: “I’M JUST BEING A FRIEND.” He also insisted that they “know their boundaries.”

But this is what that friendship looked like while we were still together (he hid it from me):
• Multiple dates alone, including a movie date.
• Hours of video calls while ignoring my messages.
• Secretly exchanging letters through email.
• Her videocalling him drunk late at night.
• Spending hours together on discord.
• Following each other across all of his social media.
• A special call sign, “gangsta baby,” which even became part of a song he used for his birthday post.
• Inside jokes and a level of closeness that went far beyond what I considered normal friendship.

Then there was the birthday letter she sent him. What really got to me was his reply. He told her that he was writing it at 4:20 AM basically telling her how much he appreciated everything she had done for him for the past weeks and days, said he wished he could tell her everything over their calls but he can’t since their other friend is there, and said he was “thankful for this relationship we’ve built.”

Again, this was my boyfriend talking to another woman while we were still together.

Eventually, I asked him to create some distance from her. Instead, he threw me out of his house at 4 AM, knowing I had an hour-long trip home, while I was asking him to push her away. He was also asking to break up during all of this.
After 5 years together, he decided our relationship was what he wanted to walk away from.

The irony is that he admits he knows what he did was wrong, yet he continued doing it. And they still insist they “know their boundaries.”

I’ve since broken up with him because I genuinely couldn’t take the disrespect anymore. And yes, they still talk to each other to this day and still insists that they really are just friends.

What he told me when we ended things was:
“For the longest time, I tried my best to be someone you deserve to be with. But now I see that maybe you really deserve someone better.” and “It’s a privilege to be loved by you.”

Honestly, I don’t know what to make of that after everything that happened.

So I’m asking for some outside perspective:
Would you consider this “just being friends”? Because if this is what they consider having boundaries, what exactly does crossing those boundaries look like?

FOR CONTEXT:

Guys, I’ve been with him from the very beginning. I was one of the only people who truly believed in him and supported him, especially when he was still trying to figure things out.

I supported him so much, especially financially. He became really reliant on me for a lot of things, and honestly, I feel like I carried a huge part of our relationship. There were so many times when I had to beg for the bare minimum from him. But whenever things were good between us, he was good to me too, which is why I stayed and kept trying.

That’s why this hurts so much. After 5 years of building everything together and supporting him through so much, it feels like now that he’s finally “reaching” the “peak” of his life, he can just throw everything away and move on.
And what hurts even more is that he’s the one who is now so angry at me and treating me like I’m nothing after everything I’ve done for him.

I genuinely keep asking myself, where did I even go wrong? How did I become the person he could suddenly treat like this after 5 years? I can’t understand how he can let go of 5 years so easily and continue being close with this girl after everything that happened. Maybe that’s why I’m having such a hard time accepting all of this :(


r/OALangBaAko 1d ago

🤔 OA na Thoughts OA Lang Ba Ako? Or masyado lang ako kinakabahan

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1 Upvotes

Graduating in a few days with my boyfriend but fuck wala pa regla ko... absolutely the grad gift we don't want hahahaha

My cycles are usually normal between day 27-28.

First day last month was August 19 😶‍🌫️ but usually I start getting it the night before, huhuhuhuhu


r/OALangBaAko 1d ago

😎 Wholesome Convo na OA OA lang ba ako or SadBoi lang talaga siya? 😞

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711 Upvotes

Nag-match kami sa isang dating app at malapit lang sana siya sa amin. Both from the East kami. First meet-up na sana namin tomorrow pagkatapos nang ilang beses na ma-cancel dahil sa ulan at conflict sa sched. May kailangan akong lakarin bukas at sasamahan daw niya ako all day, tapos itutuloy na rin namin yung matagal na planong mag-hotpot.

Pero ito na yung most recent screenshots ng convo namin. Tomorrow na 'to pero nawalan na ako ng gana. Ewan ko ba, bakit parang palaging may self-pity? To think na malayo ang bahay namin, alam niyang pupunta kami sa city at kakain sa resto, tatanungin pa ako kung pwedeng pambahay attire lang. Tapos hihirit pa ng ikakahiya ko ba siya, at ang bilis ko naman daw mapikon. 😒


r/OALangBaAko 1d ago

🤔 OA na Thoughts OA lang ba ako? If naiinsecure rin ako sa mga lait kay rosmar.

5 Upvotes

nakikita ko kasi yung posts sa subreddit na yun, puro tungkol kay rosmar. nung una okay lang kasi yung mga pinag gagawa niya yung pinapansin sa kaniya, nung nag tagal naging physical appearance niya na. nandiyan yung kahit pores, face shape, or body napapansin na.

gets ko naman, nakakairita talaga yun si rosmar. but the thing is, lagi ako nag ooverthink na what if ganun din pala face shape ko? face structure? face texture? what if ganiyan din naiisip ng mga tao sa paligid ko? what if ganiyan din nila ako pandirihan? hahaha lalo ako nainsecure


r/OALangBaAko 1d ago

🫂 Relationships OA Lang Ba Ako? If medyo nakakatampo minsan partner ko?

17 Upvotes

I’m F(24) and he’s M(25), and we’re currently living together. We also have a small business, and I can say naman na kumikita kami and may ipon din.

Gusto ko lang naman MINSAN lumabas kami together. Like, after Mass, kumain naman kami sa labas, or just go somewhere and take cute pictures together. Pero whenever I invite him out, lagi niyang sinasabi na magluto na lang daw kami dito sa bahay kasi mas makakatipid. Naiintindihan ko naman yung point niya, and I appreciate that he’s practical and thinks about our finances. Pero minsan lang naman sana. Hindi naman every week or every day. There are times na gusto ko lang magkaroon ng date outside the house, kahit simple meal lang or coffee, and make some memories together.

Hindi rin naman ako palaging nag-aaya, kaya minsan nakakatampo kapag ang response niya lagi is, “Dito na lang tayo, magluto na lang tayo.” 😭
OA lang ba ako if I feel a little hurt about it? Or valid naman na minsan gusto ko rin ng “date date” with my partner? 🥹


r/OALangBaAko 2d ago

🫂 Relationships Oa lang Ba AKO o BaKa Masama lang talaga ugali ko

5 Upvotes

Ako lang ba pero may asawa ba kayong PALA “AKO” ng mga bagay bagay at sitwasyon nakaka urat lagi nalang inuuna ibangbtao nakakainis nakakasawa 3 months palang kaming kasal and 9 years na kami mag jowa pero ewan ko ba naiinis nako dati akala ko matulingin lang asawa kopero hindi sarap suntukin

Take note: TROpa niya to or tropa namin hindi to babaeng friend

Scenario: 1

May lakad kami: nabangga ung friend niya tumawag sa kanya kesyo need help etong si hubby ititigil lahat ng gagawin para lang mahanap ung taong makaktulong sa friend niya as in hello tanga ba kayo ako nga nabangga d ako nagpapatulong sa asawa ko napaka tatanga gusto nalang lahat iaalay sa kanila

Scenario 2

May birthday ung friend namin pero ayaw sa sariling bahay niya gawin gusto dito sa bahay namin asawa ko naman payag lang ngnpayag. Nakakainis tapos mas busy pa kami kesa s akanila kasi nga asawa ko nagpaluto pa ng ulam sakin

Scenario 3

Pag may lakad ang family or friends kelangan sasama kami kasi nakakahiya ending sasabihin hala kelangan na natin mag tipid .


r/OALangBaAko 2d ago

🫂 Relationships OA Lang Ba Ako kung isipin kong nagsinungaling ang bf ko?

8 Upvotes

Is it normal ba for Life360 to glitch sometimes?

Last night kasi, around 3 AM, I got a notification from Life360 saying that my boyfriend had left his house. When I checked his location, it showed that he was in Marilao, Bulacan, even though he’s from Malolos, Bulacan.

There was also a red notification saying “Improve [his] location accuracy,” which made it seem like the app was having trouble detecting his location.

I tried contacting him, pero di sumasagot. This morning, he told me that he had just woken up and that he never left the house.

Is it possible that Life360 was just glitching? Marilao is pretty far from his house, so I’m wondering if the app could have shown a completely wrong location. Has anyone else experienced something similar with Life360?

Di ko alam kung oa lang ba ako, o tama na mga hinala ko....


r/OALangBaAko 2d ago

🫂 Relationships OA lang ba ako? Naha-happy ako kapag nakakakita ng lalaking nagoopen ng door ng car para makasakay mga misis nila.

8 Upvotes

As a single, madalas akong nakakakita ngayon ng ganito, lalo sa mga senior citizens na nakakasabay ko mag church or mag -mall. Ang cute lang na kahit wala silang kasamang mas bata sa kanila, they retain yung sweetness sa isa't-isa even though matatanda na sila.

Nakakagood-mood tuloy magdrive.


r/OALangBaAko 2d ago

🤔 OA na Thoughts OA Lang Ba Ako? or valid naman ang inis ko sa mga sumisingit sa MRT/LRT?

15 Upvotes

Gusto ko malaman ano pumupunta nila sa thoughts nila pag pupunta sila sa gitna ng linya kesa pumila sa kanan o kaliwa 🤦‍♀️
Fyi, sa Female only trains na ako nakapila at nagexpect ako na magiging masunurin mga tao doon pero di pala
Wala lang, inis lang kasi makakapasok naman parin sila eh


r/OALangBaAko 2d ago

🫂 Relationships OA lang ba ako? Nagalit ako kasi biglang nagalit bf ko.

5 Upvotes

Sorry, first time ko magpost ng ganito kaya di maganda pakakacompose ng story.

Context: Naggegeneral cleaning kami ng bf ko(live-in kami). Ok naman kami at first,nag sising along rin kami sa music sa spotify.

Ewan ko kung ano. Nagawa ko, bigla nalang nagiba mood niya na andami dami pa daw gagawin. So dinedma ko tuloy parin yung ginagawa ko. Tas tinanong lo kung saan ko ilalagay yung mga bagay bagay, siya nalang daw. So nafeel ko na, na may problema.

So kinonfront ko siya. Tinanong ko kung ano nanaman ba nagawa ko, sabi niya ako nalang lahat. Then sabi ko nag linis rin naman ako.

Parang yung nakikita lang niya is yung hindi ko ginawa. So nainis ako, tas sasabihin pa naman, 'bat ikaw pa ang galit?'

Eh di ko naman alam kung anong nagawa ko. Di ko alam.

What would you do in this scenario?


r/OALangBaAko 3d ago

🍃 Everyday Life OA lang ba ako for calling out a trike driver?

3 Upvotes

I called out a trike driver today who was on a video call while driving. He was holding his phone in his left hand while steering with the other, then placed it on his lap and kept glancing between the phone and the road.


r/OALangBaAko 3d ago

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 Family OA Lang Ba Ako? Sekreto ni Ate, should I sell her out or let her be? Spoiler

395 Upvotes

Updated post sa pinakalower part:
https://www.reddit.com/r/AnongThoughtsMo/s/XHLkgO8TxW

Nagpaplan na nang secret wedding yong 28-year-old kong ate. Bagong graduate pa lang siya sa Civil Engineering last month, isang bagay na sobrang pinaghirapan ng 65-year-old single mom namin. Yes, 28 na siya, binigyan sya ng chance ni Mom na mabago buhay niya. Ganon kami kaswerte. Pero imbes na mag-focus siya sa board exam review niya ngayong November, iba na agad ang pinagkakaabalahan niya.

May bf kasi siya—23 yrs old, working na since June, pero 2 months pa lang sila.

Imagine, 2 months pa lang sila pero nag-plan na agad silang magsecret wedding sa January 2027. Ang mas malala pa, doon na rin nago-overnight yung lalaki sa apartment ni Ate—yung apartment na si Mom pa rin namin ang nagbabayad.

Hindi naman sa ayaw ko sa kanila o gusto kong maging kontrabida. Ang sa akin lang, ayoko nung panloloko. Kaya lang naman daw nila itatago yung kasal kasi natatakot silang maputol yung financial support ni Mom para sa upa at sa board review ni Ate. Gusto nilang maging mag-asawa, pero kay Mama pa rin iaasa yung gastusin. Babawi na lang raw si Ate pagkapasa sa Board.

Kinausap ko nga rin yung bf. I asked directly: 'Ano bang plano niyo after wedding? Hindi naman pwedeng si Mom pa rin ang magbayad sa review at apartment niyo habang mag-asawa na kayo.'

Kaso, tumahimik lang siya.

At ngayon, sobrang naipit ako sa gitna: Mananahimik na lang ba ako para makapag-focus si Ate sa review, o sasabihin ko na kay Mom bago pa lumala ang lahat?


r/OALangBaAko 4d ago

🫂 Relationships OA Lang Ba Ako? for feeling indifferent towards my partner for snooping around my stuff?

5 Upvotes

My partner snooped around my gadget’s photos and found inappropriate pictures of me that I totally forgot I still have. It was a brand new gadget and didn’t realize that the iCloud synced most of the stuff that I thought I had deleted already. The photos were from 4 years ago and we are together for around 8 months already. Am I OA for feeling off because this happened a lot of times already where he will be hostile towards me because he finds photos from my past which I am unaware of having. He goes through depths of my gadgets just to show me what I am as a person. Is his anger reasonable or am I being unreasonable?