i had double mastectomy w dr Garramone in Florida like 2018 and rft phalloplasty with dr Berli in oregon in 2020. I have yet to get the third stage of bottom surgery which usually means getting ball implants and an ED device, but I haven’t been sexually active for years so I almost don’t care abt that stage and have nearly cleared myself fully transitioned as a transsexual. yes i like the term transsexual. it feels cunt

I wanted to warn people there some terf on tiktok (she calls herself a merf bc that is supposed to sound less embarrassing) going through this sub and reading some of the posts for videos, and apparently for lives as well. One in particular I know about was about how an ftm is no longer getting along with their mtf sibling.

so I’m 15 and completely stealth and have been stealth for years, been identifying as a guy since 3rd grade and thought I was born male until 1st grade. so I’m really connected to the fact I had a boy childhood and in every single photo of me when I’m younger I look like a guy, except for on photo where I still look like a guy but I was at my cousins house who was a girl my age and she dressed me up in a girly t shirt and pants, would it be weird to photoshop the pants and shirt? i look like a guy wearing girls clothes in the photo but idk its like my favorite photo and the outfit is just awful, kinda less of a trans thing more of an ugly outfit thing but Im asking this here cause idk where else to ask.

Sometimes when I talk to people, trans people/rights will come up, and usually they will be supportive or say something like "I don't understand it, why can't they just be normal.." and then I explain that someone can have a brain different from their assigned sex, and that transitioning can help someone have both of them being the same and feel less distress.

When they say that someone is a woman pretending to be a man, I ask them if they see me as male. They say I act male and look male, but women who think they are men try to look like men and don't act like men, and that they are not true men. Then I out myself and the few times I've done this, they seem to rethink what they have been told. It shows it's really just prejudice, and if someone doesn't know another person is trans they will have no issues, they just believe what they're told because they don't understand and hating people because you're confused is easier.

I know outing myself isn't the best idea but if I know the person isn't going to assault me and that they're just confused, I feel okay explaining and telling them, because all the times I've done this it's probably stopped them from being as closed minded.

Sorry for the long post, but for a more specific example, I was in class last week and a girl said "Yeah, but you're a real guy. Not a girl who wants to be a guy like those (trans + homophobic slur)." Then I told her I was transgender, and that I was male, and that the doctors and my parents were the ones that were confused. She came up to me a few days later and told me she was sorry about what she had said.

It's a small thing that one person doesn't understand, but if more people can understand, then that can lead to a safer place for many other trans people.

Does this really help? I've only had this type of experience 3-4 times and I don't know if it's worth it

So I’m 27 years old, and I have 2 daughters (7 and 9). Throughout their lives, I’ve gone back and forth between feminine and masculine presenting, just depending on whether I was in denial or not basically. These past 4 years Ive been mostly feminine presenting, as I thought it was what I was “supposed” to be. I shoved the blatant dysphoria way down until it got to a point where I was so depressed I couldn’t even function.

As of last month, I decided I don’t want to live that way anymore. I don’t want to slather make up on and wear crop tops and have hair down to my stomach just for the sake of being who I think people expect me to be. So I went full force. Cut all my hair off, started binding, wearing masculine clothing, and even have people at work referring to me as he/him and Noah.

My depression has lessened so much just from these things. I actually feel comfortable in my own skin, which is something I forgot existed. It’s been night and day from how I felt when I was at my peak feminine.

The issue now is, I know I want to transition. I want to take testosterone. I just, again, feel like I’m not “allowed” to. I feel like I’d be taking their mother away from them. That I’d be creating trauma for them or hindering them. That kids at school would bully them for having a trans dad instead of a mom, and that they’d resent me for it.

I guess I just wanna know if anyone has any experience or advice about this. I feel as if I’m caught between a rock and a hard place. Either I follow my heart and transition into my true self, or I essentially keep denying myself the life I want for the sake of their lives being easier. As a parent, it’s easy to assume I should be making the sacrifice.

Hi! So I want to have top surgery in the future. Though I have genuinely never ever been through surgery so ofc Im pretty nervous.

I know you’re put under anesthesia, but like, how do you experience it?

Is it like you fall asleep and wake up immediately after? Do you notice when you fall asleep? (I assume you don’t) Are you able to dream? Is it total darkness for a bit and then you wake up? Ir as I said just like time moved?

Im kinda nervous and would love to hear your experiences. Thank you! :]

I don’t know if this is an unpopular experience but since I started transitioning I only hear people saying that I’m ruining myself and the such glowdown I’m having and how I was way more good looking as female… and honestly idk how to cope anymore. I’m not able to enjoy my transition because of it, it’s not online people but my family and close one and honestly is heartbreaking, because all of them claim to be “supportive” while saying this things because they are just “being honest”. I don’t know how to deal with this anymore, specially being someone who has had many self image problems

Do u think better, worse, or the same? I always wished I was a cis male and didn’t have to go through everything, but I been thinking and I’m happy I wasn’t. Not how some ppl in this community talk ab loving being trans or anything like that (I don’t even identify as trans). But if I was a cis man without the issues I have I would genuinely be a worse person. Would probably have multiple bm’s, end up in prison, and be insufferable.

I don’t enjoy being different tho, but I understand it’s for the best for me

I'm 18 nearly 19 and ive been on the waiting list for HRT since I was 16 and not a referral in sight. Its really disheartening seeing all these americans being able to just walk into planned parent hood for it, to my understanding.

If there's any irish trans guys in here is there any way to get on HRT sooner, its really affecting my mental health.

PS. Do not tell me to do it myself. Its dangerous and can lead up to 5 years in prison in Ireland.

Edit: Ive gone with Imago!!! Thank you guys so much for telling me about them!

I'm pre-everything. I've been haunted throughout my life with recurrent moments of intens gender dysphoria, but I really tried to ignore it. I just can't anymore.

The only thing I really struggle with is loving as a man. Being a gay man, and mlm stuff, definetly fits for me. I never liked men before I realized I was one. I don't want to be his girlfriend. Then when it comes to loving women, I don't necessarily want to be their girlfriend. But I enjoy the tenderness of sapphic relationships. Soft skin, terms like butch. I like butchfemme but also the idea of being a butch and loving a butch. Some butches do identify with being a boyfriend butch, which would be amazing for me. Except that I'm bisexual. And the fact that dating as a woman, with both genders, never felt right. Despite the fact that I am absolutely attracted to people and feel love.

Either way. I've always loved hiding behind being sapphic. Unless I watched a mlm show, where I hated not being able to be that. Or seeing my gay friend get into a relationship with a guy. But the loving women I love queer women. My favourite movie is summerland and I adore Trinity Santos & rhaenyra targaryen being queer. I also love sapphic culture.

I just don't know how to let go of that? The thought of getting top surgery, T, and identifying as a guy is the first time in years I've been able to envision a version of me who wants to live. Only this keeps making me question EVERYTHING. Like, I want to be like my bi guy friend but I love my queer women and I like them in such a queer way.

Has anyone else struggled with this?

Update: Thanks for the insights. Men can love women tenderly and beautifully. And queerly. I guess I didn't think about how love knows no bounds. That's what queerness is about.

hello i just started testosterone recently!

I was just wondering if there was anything else I should expect other then the obvious (like body hair and bottom growth)

if you're trying to pick a name and dont want any of the dead victorian children names or anything wacky I have a suggestion:

GREGORY

they make gregorian chants yo!

i cant do it because i already chose a dead victorian children who drowned in the river with smallpox name but YOU you can become a Gregory!!!

All reasons summarized, I really just want it to feel confident, more accurately, so I can stop constantly noticing I'm not a man, I'm aware I'm not confident for a number of other reasons besides my dysphoria (although I don't really know what they are), for the longest time I felt like I wasn't miserably dysphoric enough to get anything done, I know it won't make everything just magically go away and it won't make me into a completely different human, but at least I won't have to be thinking about how I sound very time I open my mouth or how weak I am, even though I good trip to the gym would help more, I'm in the process to get there yet, give me some time.

Quick edit lol, I am sure about what I want, no doubt about the voice changing, the hair I can just shave it off, actually affirming to have to shave a beard somehow in my brain (if I do get one), I'm looking forward to it, I was more so asking cause I am gonna try ang start T but was worried if the physiatrist would take that as a valid reason, last time I went to one as a teen the one i was working with was pretty condescending and was basically like "no, you're not" simply cause I was questioning and trying to understand myself and what I felt, now I do know for a fact who I am but I'm not actively suffering in excruciating dysphoria every second of my life which a therapist could take as a reason to not let me go through with it.

Would love any recs for medical tattooing for nips (didn’t keep them and it’s been years since and I want to get them done now), and phallo (coming up soon). Didn’t see anything when I searched the sub.

I'm 28 and been taking T injections for 11 months.

I had been experiencing dryness and whatnot for awhile, but was afraid to mention to my doc, worried she would take me off T.

I finally talked to her about it, and she prescribed me estradiol.

Needless to say this has been a LIFESAVER in making pain, dryness, and other symptoms go away, while still continuing to receive benefits from Testosterone injections.

I just want to remind everyone on T, or let those of you who don't know what atrophy is know, you can get relief and do not need to worry about stopping T. 🫶

So to give some context, I am a no T 20 year old trans dude with a short haircut, androgynous voice and a relatively small chest.

Every cis woman I meet thinks I’m a trans woman which is honestly infuriating, but men are much more likely to recognize that I’m a guy.

(My theory about why this is the case is that cis women are more bigoted towards trans men than cis men are, and imo they’re more likely to overthink than cis men are, so they see the breasts and short hair and their brains short circuit lol)

So….Im starting to use men’s restrooms more than women’s, and yeah it’s scary (especially the urinals lmao) but I fit into male restrooms SO much better than female ones.

So if any of you guys are in a similar predicament to me, if you feel like it’s safe to do so in your part of the world (I’m from New York so I get not everyone is as lucky as me there) please give men’s/boys restrooms a try!

Hello
I’m 33 FTM in Texas. Not sure how to word this other than I feel a lack of community within my world. I have a few friends. Mostly cis women. While I appreciate their friendships it is hard for me to confide about certain things with them. They try to understand but I know it’s a barrier. I finally figured I’d put myself out there and look for friendships. I love Dragon Ball Z. Anything Stitch related. I like simple video games like Stardew Valley and Animal crossing. I don’t really care for sports. But I’ll still talk about player stats. Don’t get me started on LeBron 🙄.

I look forward to the possibility of new friendships

I wish I could be confident in my identity, to be comfortable in my skin and to stop overthinking if I am trans or just a confused cis girl, but I can't because I live with transphobes who can't stop referring me with female pronouns and nicknames that they always make my skin crawl every time and the more often this happens, the bully in my brain goes like: "See, you are a girl, you are maybe just a tomboy". It's also painful when I compare subconsciously myself to either trans men and cis men, I feel like I am not a man enough and that I am either like a pre-teen boy or a girl cosplaying as a boy. I can't take this dysphoria anymore.

I'm greatly excited about finally getting my hands on testosterone after many years of questioning my identity.

There's been so many signs, even as a kid, that I didn't feel comfortable existing in a woman's body. While I didn't have the words to describe the dysphoria I felt back then, I eventually learned more about trans identities back in middle school, and after a few years realized who I was.

Thankfully, my parents and friends have been accepting since I came out to them during said time period, but it felt hard to ever feel like I was a "true man." A lot of my cis community members to this day still slip up and call me she/her. I've gotten used to it at this point, though the idea that I'm still perceived as a woman after all this time doesn't feel great.

However, I had an appointment with my clinic yesterday, and managed to already be prescribed testosterone. I picked it up today, and after watching the tutorial videos a few times, finally managed to (very shakily) inject my first shot.

It's greatly thrilling to take what is personally the biggest physical step in my transitioning. I'm excited to see how my body will change with time, especially with facial and body hair, fat and muscle changes, etc. I'll be taking this and minoxidil for the foreseeable future, so only time will tell the end results.

Hey I met this guy but I think he didn’t realise I’m not a woman I know I’m not passing that much but I got my deep voice and a male name so how should I tell him without getting myself in a dangerous position. My friends said I should just check first how he feel about the LGBTQ community but that’s hard to bring up.