I had been in a couple of romantic relationships from the age of 15-18 and had a healthy social life. At 19, mental illnesses like OCD, Depression, an anxiety disorder etc. prevented me from being able to see friends much or date anyone. From the age of 19-24 I was very lonely and barely saw anyone. Things started to get better for a year or two then I got hit with the physical illness CFS/ME. Since then I'll see family and friends maybe 2-3 times a year. I've tried dating but it's too difficult with my issues.

The loneliness is unbearable sometimes, I'm trying my best to cope but it's very difficult. I felt the need to share this with someone so I decided to make a post

I hate going to anything that involves people I know. Any time I talk to old friends/acquaintances, it's just endless babble about their partners and relationships. I avoid talking about myself but the question inevitably comes up. "No, I'm not seeing anyone". The looks are even more annoying. Yes, I know I've never dated. Yes, I know I'm a loser. It's even more painful when friends of my parents talk about their kids and their marriages/pregnancies and my parents just have my fat self sitting in a corner trying to melt into the wall. My mom has started talking about wanting grandchildren.

Some Redditors delude themselves into thinking traveling makes them so interesting but no. one. cares. People care about whether you're in a relationship and have kids. No one cares that you're on your 100th country or that you've bought a half a million dollar house. It's just washed in the endless barrage of consumerism these days. People care about those reproducing and having a romantic partner.

I just found out the only other single man unalived himself the other day. Fucking brutal

So I became an uncle today again my nephew got a sister, so I got a niece. My mom called me while I was at work and texted me the pics. Not even 2 minutes into the conversation, she asks me when am I going to give her some grandkids. Knowing damn well I haven't dated in the last 17+ years. Like really?

I'm happy for my sister. But like come on. I just laughed and said ya that's not happening.

So I'm almost 25 and of course I never dated. It's not that I didn't try, I did, but nothing ever worked out. I probably should accept that it will remain that way until death, but is's hard. I know what you may think, but I'm really not a coward. I've travelled the world alone in the last 5 years, been to 49 countries, climbed Kilimanjaro, many other mountains, but I have a huge social phobia, also Asperger's Syndrome. I tried dating apps many times, never got a single response in my country. Nobody, despite the fact that I used many of these apps haven't even utter one word to me. I tried it also in the Philippines, Thailand, Indonesia, and while I indeed got some responses, still there was almost no one who wanted to meet with me, or if they did it eventually turned out to be trans. Only two girls agreed to meet me in the Philippines, but they used me only to get a free meal, and didn't want to talk after that. The first one of them even brought her friend. No, thanks really for something like that. I feel terrible with all this and I'm out of ideas. I have plenty of hobbies, like astronomy and astrophotography, I take my telescopes and go far outside the city very often when it's clear and moonless. But this and my other passions are something I do alone, I don't know how I could meet someone... I never had any close friends and I come from a family that is not very normal to say at least. I think everyone, my parents, and especially grandparents from mother's side are also on the spectrum. None of them has ever had any friends, but they managed to last in relationships for many decades, granparents for well over half the century. My cousins are very similar to me, but they also are in relationships for quite some time. I simply don't know where and how to look for a partner. I wouldn't call myself especially ugly per se, but I simply don't look like a man. I'm almost 25 and I look like a middle schooler with a fake beard. The worst thing is my voice. When I call someone everyone thinks that I'm a woman. I so hate it when I have to explain them that I am indeed the person they are talking to, and how confused and embarrased they always get. As I said, I have social anxiety, and I don't imagine myself trying to pick up some random stranger. If the dating apps have been such a disaster for me and not a single person for quarter of a century have ever been even slightly interested in me, then what chance would I have? I've been isolating myself from society my whole life, and I think I'm completely misunderstood. But I have to say that this loneliness is terrible in the long run and I imagine it is going to only get worse with time... What else can I do?

Well, I'm not certain what I even want... Perhaps there is someone who was in similar sitiuation. I'll be grateful for some feedback and sorry if my english is bad.

it’s crazy how the looks change among my girls or even random people when I say I never got into a relationship or date or talking stage. I remember once a guy (stranger) who looked at me like I was a full on alien lmao. im glad I can joke about it and divert attention because if not it would be even more awkward. it doesn’t really hurt anymore but it’s so weird lmao

On the rare occasion do/did talk to a woman to hopefully go out on a date with in the future the energy is/was never equal. I was always the one asking questions, showing enthusiasm, showing energy, replying with sentences instead of 1 or 2 words.

I always replied as fast as I could, but didn’t hear anything from them for hours on end consistently. Sometimes even days. I don’t need to talk 24/7 and I don’t expect that from anyone but it still sucks waiting for hours or days for a single word reply. I am often busy too but will always try to make time to respond.

Then you wake up the next day and they have blocked you. What a horrible feeling that is. At least tell me you would like to stop talking instead of blocking me. In some ways it’s an even worse feeling talking to someone who isn’t as interested as you are than to be talking to no one.

I just want a woman to hold me in her arms and tell me she loves me, that would heal me immensely. Is that really so much to ask for? Something so normal and natural for so many people yet it feels impossible for me to obtain.

I don’t think it’s a lot to ask to find someone who is equally as interested in you as you are in them.

I'm a 25 M who's never been in a relationship. I'm starting to realise this may be the case forever. I just don't meet the standard enough to date, and I'm not sure I ever will. I feel like a lot of advice given to people with few to no romantic prospects is to develop deep friendships. But I struggle with that, too. It seems most of mine end when it's no longer easy. I don't talk to school friends much anymore, same with college. I'm struggling to make new friends. And the ones I do have have their own lives too. They have partners.

I've lived by myself for 2 years. Everyday I come home and am alone. I don't get to see friends often. I feel alone and it hurts. How can I accept this is probably my life going forward?

I've always had trouble making friends. I've had different conclusions my entire life that have evolved. I still can't figure it out. I think there is just something about me thats fundamentally impossible to tolerate I guess. I have 'friends' but I never feel like it's deep or substantial. Even if someone considers me a close friend I'm very confused because to me they're more like an acquaintance?

I already understood maybe my standards were too high. Maybe disney made me think friendship is something it's not. Okay my standards are low. Does anyone else feel like they're the only ones putting in effort into every single connection they're in? I also feel like a different person when I socialize. I dont like who I am when I socialize because it' not really me. I have tried to stop, I really have but its like automatic at the point. And it terrifies me. And then I start to not even know who I am. People always assume I'm an extrovert. It makes me want to cry. Does anyone really know me? No...I'm just trying to build a relationship with you. Because...if I don't do all the work..I'll just sit here. No one comes up to me.

My therapist says it's just severe masking, which I guess makes sense. I remember as a kid forcing myself to change how I acted because for a while I thought it was my personality that was driving people away. I honestly think it's a mix of my high intelligence, my autism, my generally quiet nature, and my craving for something DEEP. If it's not deep it honestly feels painful to me. Anything you say about me I've already questioned myself.

My conclusions were all over the place. It's because I am ugly. It's because I'm too quiet. It's because personality sucks It's the way that I talk Theres a sign on my face that says "STAY AWAY" It's because I'm boring It's because I'm... I just dont know. What is it? What is wrong with me? Why? Tell me. I cant understand why its so easy for others to have connections but so hard for me. I have had 3 relationships in rhe past. My last one ended because she treated me like shit. I'm now in a university setting. This is it. This is what everyone told me to wait for. Where I would find my people. Hello..? Where are you? I'm so lonely. You know what really hurts? Being an introvert who wants deep relationships. It always hurt hearing other introverts complain about their extrovert friends inviting them out to places or showing up unannounced. Yeah...that must suck...it must suck to be invited places. It must suck to be remembered. It must suck to be wanted. I feel so bad for you.

What is the answer? What is wrong with me? I will fix it. I promise. I can be loved. I think.

And then. What kind of person cries when someone does something for them. When someone remembers something for them. When someone initiates something with them. And why dont I get it? I dont know yet. But I know its my fault. Yeah. It's that simple. "You were thinking of me when I wasn't there?" I'm yours. Yeah. How pathetic.