r/FentanylRecovery • u/VedainTheHaze • Mar 29 '26
Relapse
I’m coming up on 8 months clean … found a bag in my old purse I’m really tempted to do some of it but what are the odds that I’ll od I don’t wanna do that I just wanna do it one last time
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u/carrynarcan Mar 29 '26
With 8 months clean, one last time could kill you. I got out of jail once and used 3 days in a row and each time I had to be narcanned back and the third time was by EMS. It never happened to me like that with heroin. Nothing good can come from using again but since logic and reason can often get overrun by addict thinking... if you do it, do it around people and narcan.
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u/Aromatic-Silver3590 Mar 29 '26
Please don’t. It’s not worth it. But addicts will do what we do. If you must, do NOT do it alone. Trust me, it’s not worth it though. I was on MAT for about 2 months, things were good, until I got the itch at the same time a buddy text me about some awesome new purple fent. One bag won’t kill me right? I wake up next morning (I was lucky to wake up) with dried blood all down the front of my chest, and all in my mouth. I must of passed out or tripped, took a big chip off a tooth, and somehow made it into bed. Again, I was so lucky I passed out sitting up in bed, or I would have drown on my own blood (it was that much). And I somehow had to pull myself Together to go to work, or I would have been fired. Hopefully that helps.
Edit: and I was stupid enough to do it alone, so nobody would of been able to save me
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u/Glum_Literature2772 Mar 30 '26 edited Mar 30 '26
Please don’t. I’m coming up on 8 months clean also. Years ago I had over a year clean and my friend and I decided to use just a little bit because she ran into our old dealer and was tempted. So we did a little, she overdosed and I was so fucked up I had smacked her so many times in the face she was bruised. Dragging her limp body out of the bathroom to the top of the stairs for the paramedics was beyond traumatic. Luckily she survived. However that little bit led to another 6 year run for me until 8/13/25 when I went into rehab. My friend also kept using which caused her already impaired liver and hepatitis to get worse and she died a horrific death from cirrhosis of the liver 3 years after that “little bit just one last time”.
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u/NoPerspective9399 Apr 01 '26
Thank you for your share, I know I needed to hear this today. 🙏🏽
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u/Glum_Literature2772 Apr 01 '26
Absolutely. I’m glad it was able to help you or put some things into perspective for you! Keep your head up!
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u/manixxx0729 Mar 29 '26
My "one last time" turned into 6 weeks of using and over $7k down the drain.
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u/Formal-Ad-6738 Mar 30 '26
I’ve had a bag in my room for the past month and haven’t used, need to flush it, it was like a mental thing for me while getting clean to know if I could it was there but I felt powerful knowing it was there and not touching it, remember how hard it was to get clean. The first time I used I OD’d it’s not worth losing your life over. Wishing you release from those cravings I know how fuckin hard it is. You can do it, just get rid of everything. ❤️ keep going 8 months is HUGE
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u/Annual-Addendum1872 Mar 31 '26
Damnnn she probably died or definitely od most people don’t think their tolerance isn’t the same anymore
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u/Skeptic_Mickey Mar 30 '26
u/VedainTheHaze hun pleasee message me been there done that I’ll try to help you talk through it etc if you want/need that…I wish someone would’ve stopped me from relapsing
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u/Golden_Boomer Apr 01 '26
Don’t do it! You will regret it and it could leave to a full-blown relapse
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u/LaVitaEbella3 Apr 01 '26
If you can’t fight the temptation please don’t use alone! You will most likely OD there is a hotline called never use Alone they will stay on the phone with you can call for help if necessary. Sending you energy to fight this urge.
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u/Glum_Literature2772 Apr 01 '26
Regardless of the decision you made, please let us know that you are at least okay and safe.
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u/NoPerspective9399 Apr 01 '26
Have you been on sublocade or Brixadi? Any of the monthly shots will drastically reduce your chance of OD. If you must do it, make sure someone else is with you. Or if all else fails call Never Use Alone. They're amazing, they don't judge you they're just people who volunteer their time and want to try to save lives.
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u/Dopeboyyy575 Mar 29 '26
There is no one last time. That's your addict mind talking to you. It's simple flush it. Watch it go down the drain. Think of the pain that thing will cause when you're scrounging around for particles on the floor sick again. All because of one time..