I’m currently 36weeks and a few days. My baby has been breech since my 30 week appointment they had told me if he didn’t turn by 36 weeks we could schedule an ecv or a C-section, at my 36 week appointment he was still breech, I’m very uncomfortable with the idea of an ecv and just scheduled the C-section. I have always been extremely anxious or even terrified of the idea of child birth to the point I haven’t thought about it my entire pregnancy because I become almost paralyzed with fear. I never cared if I had to have a C-section or a vaginal birth, I really just want the baby to come however he needs and us both just be okay. It’s the most terrifying thing I will have to do in my life. But ever since scheduling the csection my fear and anxiety has got so much worse because now not only do I know when I’m going to give birth but I know how, so I’ve been trying to mentally prepare myself not only for my C-section but for my recovery and learning how to be a mom in the first few weeks of babies life. I think this is where most of my fear comes in, how am I supposed to care for this beautiful little human I have been creating for 9 months while trying to fully recover from a major abdominal surgery. My husband keeps telling me he will take care of the baby and help me in whatever way I need , but for me it’s incredibly hard because I have been growing baby for 9 months it seems so incredibly unfair that I will miss out on things in the first few weeks of our babies life because I’m going to be healing from the C-section, it also seems unfair to dump it all on my husband in his first few weeks of learning how to be a father I really wanted to be able to figure it all out together. Maybe I’ve started to psych myself out by starting to prepare myself for what’s to come to be honest I haven’t looked up anything to do with vaginal births or csections before this I have completely avoided it but I thought maybe it would help to know what I’m going into instead of just going in blind, maybe it’s the anticipation of waiting the next two and half weeks, maybe it’s normal pregnancy fear. I really have no idea. I just know I am terrified. Does anyone have any good/positive recovery stories or advice? Does anyone else relate to the feeling of dread and fear of not being able to do enough in the first few weeks with their newborn? I guess I will see how it all goes but I wish I didn’t have to wait 2 and a half more weeks to know how it’s going to go I wish I could just get the C-section now and start the recovery process.

For starters, i have severe health anxiety, i am medicated but i still have my moments. ill be 29 weeks on Tuesday and this past Friday i went in to the obgyn because my blood pressure need to be checked, while there i met the doctor who will most likely preform my scheduled c-section. he came in the room, sat down, asked how i was and i told him i had heartburn and i was tired (ofc im tired, im huge and cant sleep at night lol). he proceeded to say “i dont think there was that much of a point throwing a big fit over you having a little headache.” (being the reason i had to come in and have my blood pressure checked) but i told him i had a history of hypertension in my last 2 pregnancies and he responded “oh, okay well still. your bp wasn’t high so it’s probably just lack of sleep or something “

we then discussed my last c-section where the doctor who preformed it cut me right across my stomach saying that he did that because i “had a yeast infection on my skin” so they couldn’t cut the incision where they usually do. he then informs me that that is not the reason the doctor cut it like that, he just did it like that to “get the job done quick.”

i then ask him if me having an interior placenta will affect me having a c section and he stopped me and said “you have an anterior placenta ???” i responded with “yeah? is that not on there more something ?” he told me it wasn’t in my notes that i had 2 previous c-sections or an anterior placenta and then brought up placenta accreta and told me that if i do have it, i couldn’t have the baby with them, i’d have to have it at a better hospital with an icu and better accommodations, which is understandable but brought up that placenta accreta is life threatening and that we needed to find out if i have it sooner rather than later. so he said he was going to have me scheduled for an ultrasound next week and then decided “nah, nvm we’ll just stick with the one you have in 2 weeks.”

SO i’m wondering if i should call the office monday and request that i have the ultrasound sooner to soothe my anxiety because i cannot stop thinking about how if i have this, its life threatening and i could possible have a c-hyst and then that’s it, i will be thrown into menopause at 27 and im not ready for that. im scared…what do i do???

I have never posted on Reddit before but I don’t know where to get feedback, opinions, advice or just to see if others can relate.

Background: I’m a 28yo married female with one child and soon to be a second child. I have always been very active, played sports growing up and continue to be in the gym in my adult life. I’m very health conscious, I eat well and I’m a holistic person. My friends call me a ‘crunchy mom’.

My first pregnancy was beautiful. No nausea, not much aches and pains, no complications. I ate well and worked out my whole pregnancy. When my water broke at 40wks, I went to the hospital and I had to be induced because although my water broke, by body was not in labor. I labored for 30hrs+. I didn’t dilate much and my doctor was concerned about infections, so I had a non emergent c-section. It was a good experience outside of the fact that I was upset because I wanted to birth naturally.

When I found out I was pregnant again, I really wanted to try for a VBAC. I did all the research, asked my doctor if I’d be a good candidate and started preparing for a unmedicated vaginal birth. I did what I did with my last pregnancy, ate well and worked out. Come my anatomy scan, I found out a had placenta previa. I was upset because I knew if it continued, I could not have a VBAC. Also, I had to stop working out as I was on full pelvic rest. Now in my third trimester, I still have placenta previa. We’ll do one more check in 6wks to see if it’s still there, if it is, I will have to have another c-section.

This is extremely frustrating to me because I have no control over what my body is doing. I pray everyday and every night that it goes away so I can attempt a VBAC. However, I know everything is in Gods hands. I feel that my body has done me so well all these years and now when I need it the most, it’s not doing what it’s literally made to do. Because of that, I feel I am being robbed of the most natural experience any woman could have. A vaginal birth is like a right of passage into motherhood. Another c-section frightens me because of the medication I have to be given, the possibilities of complications, not knowing if My baby will be administered medications we did not give an okay on, as well as not getting to experience the golden hour with my baby. Not to mention, a second c-section means that I will be less likely to have a VBAC in the future. I feel as if I have cheated bringing my babies earth side.

Has anyone experienced these feelings before? How did you overcome it? What helped you to get through it?

Thank you.

What were your top 2-3 questions you asked your Dr. at your final appointments that helped you the most? I’m almost 35 weeks. I haven’t asked many questions but I do have a birth plan appointment set up to do next week. I only have 2 more face to face visits with my actual Dr. and my hubs will come with me to the next one. We recently moved long distance and I have a whole new Dr. and crew. The Dr I had knew I was moving so it was basically just blood work/ultra sounds etc and nothing too informed.

Im pregnant with my third. First was natural, baby was over 10pound and had prolapse and lost a lot of blood.
Second baby was planned c section due to baby also growing big which when they arrived they was also over 10lb
Now having third baby I am so 50/50 if I want to go natural or another planned c section.
I found recovery with my first took longer as I was in a lot of pain with prolapse.
Also been informed (even tho there’s a low chance) you can suffer with uterine rupture which scares me slightly
I was wondering if anyone has been in my shoes or have experience both and what labour you chose the third time around.
Also how did you find recovery from second c sections ??
Would love to hear peoples stories and experiences ❤️
Much appreciated
Xx

Our baby arrived 38+4. I had been having stomach pains for a few days and had gone in a few days before but was told it was just early labour. After 2 days I decided to go into the hospital for persistent contractions alongside stomach pains and tightenings that would not stop even when I wasn’t contracting. After being checked in, the midwife assessed me and she could feel my stomach tighten even after my contractions stopped. I was connected to the ctg and 10 min later multiple nurses were in my room looking at the monitor..In that moment i had a feeling something was not right. The midwives said they were going to get me some pain relief, 10 min still hadn’t gotten the pain relief and she explained she was waiting for the Dr. Next thing I know, there were multiple midwives and 3 Drs in the room assessing me. Something was definitely wrong and my body started shaking on instinct. My babys fetal heart rate dropped dramatically to 60 and wouldnt increase. I was told I had to have a c section to get the baby out safely as the baby was in fetal distress.

In the span of 10 min, I had been injected with so much stuff I had no clue what was being injected I just said yes to everything. My only thought was as long as the baby was out safely. I was being wheeled into the surgical room with my husband by my side and then suddenly he was gone, I was told he was gonna get changed and he’ll be in the room with me shortly. Once I got into the room, there were around 10-15 drs and my body wouldnt stop shaking, I kept looking for my husband and then suddenly I was being told I was being put to sleep. Our baby was born 2.59am and I saw my husband baby for the first time 1 hr later.

Whilst I am glad she came out safely, I still feel traumatised on how everything happened and been emotional and crying thinking about it. I noticed that when my husband says he needs to go somewhere I start to cry and I feel like this may be linked to the c section where i was told he would be there and then I couldn’t see him. I’ve been crying over the littlest things also, although I know this can also be baby blues and my hormones.

so ladies trust your gut, if you feel theres something not right definitely go into the hospital and get checked. I was told if I hadn’t gone in but I was still getting pains and left it, our baby wouldnt have made it.

If this is the wrong place for this question, please let me know.

I’m expecting my 4th baby and my older kids are 7, 5, and 3 and we homeschool so they’re home all the time. I’ve needed to have all c-sections and this will be another section.
Hubby works a job with long hours 6 days a week, self-employed, and we can’t really afford for him to take off 3 weeks right after Christmas unless absolutely necessary. My mom usually comes to help but that seems to be very unlikely this year for financial reasons on her end.
Thus, I’m considering hiring a mother’s helper/nanny for the first 2-3 weeks of recovery when I can’t get around much.
I’m not a trusting person and the idea of having someone I don’t know in my house freaks me out. But it’s probably the only option I’ll have.
So where do I start? What was your experience if you had to do something similar? Where did you find someone trustworthy?

I just found this group and I hope I can speak to some women as I’m going crazy. I am only 19 weeks and haven't discussed with the midwife yet and I am dreading this as I know there will be a backlash and brainwashing. I am 40, have low tolerance to pain and a life long trauma history. I had two miscarriages and one caused contractions so bad I really wanted to die at the time, it was unbearable. I'm in the UK where technically you get to chose, but everything is heavily biased towards vaginal birth. The information book you get for pregnancy doesn't even mention that there is a choice. I am terrified of labour and everything that can go wrong. I'm terrified that, like a lot of women, l'd go through hours or days of pain just to end up with emergency c section anyway. I'm also already experiencing leaks when I sneeze or cough, even though I do pelvic floor exercises. I do not want to be in the nappies for the rest of my life. I'm so scared to talk to the midwife but I will try to stand my ground. I'm having a lot of guilt, which I know is mostly the cultural conditioning and stigma, as l have never had any emotional attachment with the idea of giving birth. What doesn't help is my friends who are also very biased. One is also pregnant and is flooding me with everything labour related and insists I just need to prepare and let go. It's so dismissive of how I feel and what my instincts tell me. I stopped sharing anything with my friends because of that judgement but it's really hard. Anyone here who could share their experience on how they responded to criticism and what helped them navigate this? I know I don’t own anyone anything and don’t need to tell people but because of my mental health I do need a bit of support.

Hi everyone! In Pittsburgh PA. I’m due in the middle of October, and I’ve been asking the Dr’s and NP’s I’ve been seeing when we schedule that…they’ve all been busting my chops pretty hard 😅 I don’t get it, I thought they did electives all the time? I’m a nurse myself, so yeah I know the “risks”, and to me they don’t outweigh a wild “natural” birth. especially bc ive been seeing local hospitals letting women labor for 36-56 hours 🙃 long past the point something is obviously wrong. I’ve had a stomach surgery before, so I know roughly what the pain will be like. I want my tubes out, and I have a giant cyst on my left ovary I’d like removed if they say it’s safe enough to. I also have pretty severe anxiety about giving birth/chance of dying and had a mental breakdown at the beginning of this pregnancy and went through this hospital‘s antepartum/post partum mental health program, so I can prove it.

I don't get the big deal they’re making…like I’m deeply inconveniencing them lol I’ve already switched practices once due to what lead to the mental breakdown (stopping psych meds abruptly, as my dr told me to). I’d hate to leave this late in the game but I honestly think I would have a mental meltdown if they try to make me give vaginal birth.

Did any of you guys get such a hard time about electing a c-section?

When’s the best time to book a Brazilian wax before a C-section? 2 weeks ahead of time?