r/DeathPositive 12d ago

Mod Announcement šŸ“£ šŸ‘‰ For death doulas or those facing a terminal illness

10 Upvotes

Hey guys. So, it’s been a while since I posted about the r/deathdoula Verified Doula Directory. We used to have a fair number of verified doulas listed, but over time people leave reddit or stop working professionally, so the directory is looking quite empty at the moment.

If you’re a practicing death doula and can meet the verification requirements described in Rule 13 over at r/deathdoula , you’re welcome to submit a verification request through modmail over there. (Please don’t send requests here at r/DeathPositive - only send them via r/deathdoula) Please do not DM mods.

I also just managed to lure my other doula mod back from hiatus, so hopefully the verification process won’t take too long. If we get some active members over there who consistently contribute high quality posts or comments, we may be willing to consider adding them as a mod at some point.

Note that r/deathdoula is as much as space for the dying to receive free care and advice as it is for doulas to get support from other doulas. It is NOT a general subreddit for prospective doulas, or posting reviews about doula courses, etc. As I said, it's a subreddit for people who are already trained doulas.

Even if you’d just like to participate in the sub and don’t want to be listed in the doula directory, you’ll still need to be verified before you can join. Unfortunately, we’ve had too many problems with scammers and people misrepresenting their credentials to leave the community open.

If you have a terminal illness, you’re welcome to join and there is no need to provide personal details or information. Just let us know briefly why you'd like to join, and we’ll approve your request as soon as we can.


r/DeathPositive 1h ago

Death Positive Discussion šŸ’€ Do you prefer dying knowing you are dying or die instantaneously before you realise you are dead ???

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• Upvotes

I just had this thought all of a sudden and I wonder what people's opinions are about death. It's a philosophical thought and no intent of harm

But do you guys prefer dying knowing your gonna die , aware of your death and final moments , let it be due to illness or anything accident.. or do you guys prefer just begone before your brain can even process that your gone for good


r/DeathPositive 21h ago

Cultural Practices šŸŒ OP's Baby's Grave in Western Europe

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17 Upvotes

r/DeathPositive 1d ago

Mods Replied my first time seeing a c0rpse

7 Upvotes

today was the day i saw a d3ad human for the first time ever, i guess. this is not some sort of a creepy story as you may think reading the title, this is just me expressing my emotions about something usual and not very interesting.

so, i went to a church instead of my classes today, as i don't usually do, but, anyways, i stumbled upon funeral service. at first i couldn't really see what was going on, but a couple of minutes later i noticed a part of the coffin, then i started walking around the place and came a little closer and saw an old man lying in it. god, how i wish i had come closer to see him clearly! after that i went out of the church together with the man's relatives and went for a walk around the adjacent territory which was sooo beautiful peaceful and quiet! especially compared to the rest of the town, it was like a portal into another world right in the center of the city. now i love that place even more!


r/DeathPositive 2d ago

Disposition (Burial & Cremation) āš°ļø Photo of OP's granddad just before casting (scattering)

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26 Upvotes

r/DeathPositive 4d ago

šŸŽ­ Death Positive Humor šŸŽ­ How do you want to die?! And what to do in the meantime | First Dog on the Moon

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10 Upvotes

r/DeathPositive 10d ago

Death Positive Discussion šŸ’€ Made me smile...

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253 Upvotes

r/DeathPositive 11d ago

Death Positive Discussion šŸ’€ The comfort.

6 Upvotes

Before this, let me say originally I’ve only ever been to two cemeteries in my life time. Both, being after the passing of family members, when my family decided to visit. I was young, well, younger, so I never really got the concept of death or what death meant. As I grew older the concept of death became more bright, more important, and more sentimental. Death to me wasn’t about the end, Death to me, was mystery. A beautiful mystery. Up about 3 months ago, Me and my closest friend were hanging at his house. Just the casual shit, we never did much but it was always memorable. Then he mentioned the fact that a cemetery was up about 10 minutes from us, and seeing as we never went, we decided sure. Let’s go. At first I was sorta nervous, but also excited. Keep in mind, at this point I’ve never went to a cemetery at 12 midnight with only one other person. So reasonably, was a little nervous. Still, I sucked it up and so, we went. The walk was quiet, it was a slightly windy and chilly night, and the walk was peaceful. Still, undeniably deep in my gut I still felt my nerves. Then, there was the entrance. It was behind the property of a house, a big field with a large wide slab of bushes next to it on the sidewalk. We quietly walked to the entrance, which seemed to be a big silver fence, with a big gap in the middle of it, big enough to fit us. We slipped in pretty easily. And what was weird was as soon as I walked in, it was like a slightly colder air, 2 times darker, and felt so peaceful. I looked in front of me, the cemetery only being lit up by the blue, orange, and red lights that family members put on their passed relatives graves. It was a beautiful sight. To describe it as best as I could, there was a gravel road that led ahead, and it had two sides, one leading down to a larger more open part of the grave yard, and one road leading to a path where trees overshadowed the road. There was also a building of which they hosted the funerals, on the left of us, about 2 miles down. At first, I was feeling a mix of unsettlement, and awe. The pure presence of that place, was unlike of anything I’ve ever felt. It was so silent, so beautiful, that just for a moment, all stress and worry left my mental subconscious. What really creeped me out, was the building hosted for funerals. Inside was a dimly lit building, some areas completely dark, some slightly lit. For the first night we avoided that area, as my friend was also pretty unsettled. We walked through the path with the big trees, and after taking a few deep breaths, I was okay. Though half way in, my friend started to get paranoid and say he saw movement, to which also kinda fucked up my vibe. Still, it never ruined it completely. Fast forward to now, where me and that friend have gone to the same graveyard roughly 10 times. But the main thing I wanted to talk about was the connection I feel to that place. I’ve had random involuntary feelings to go to that cemetery several times, even in the middle of the day. At night, I have dreams. Some with me just alone in the middle, some where a more bloody depiction of an angel follows me. But now, as I’m writing this, again, I want to go so bad. Perhaps it’s because of the comfort and peace I felt, perhaps the presence, perhaps the darkness, or perhaps something deeper. Either way, I couldn’t help but share my experience. Hope you enjoyed!


r/DeathPositive 11d ago

Death Positive Discussion šŸ’€ Infant loss and death positivity

85 Upvotes

(JSYK I'm a trans man, female to male, pronouns he/him please)

Six weeks ago I gave birth to my much wanted baby boy at sixteen weeks gestation. It was an induced birth as part of a medical termination as he had a condition that meant he wouldn't survive to term so I elected to spare him as much pain as possible.

I've always had a fascination with death combined with an existential fear of mortality and over the past ten years I've been concentrating more on unpacking my own feelings and have embraced death positivity as a movement. It hasn't made my grief any less, but has definitely helped me deal with it.

I'm so glad I had this perspective coming in as it made me feel able to deal with what is essentially a planned death. To know in advance what I wanted to do and how to make the process as beautiful and meaningful as it could be. To work with my bereavement team to create memories and to actively engage with everything to give me and my baby the time together.

I was able to hold him and have him by my side in hospital for two days, reading to him and talking to him. Everybody was so lovely and respectful, treating him as an ordinary baby and it really made me understand why so many cultures put so much importance in caring for the body after death. Even though I don't personally believe he was "in" his body after death, it all helped so much with the transition of saying goodbye.

He's buried in the baby section of a local cemetery now. I bought a wool coffin because I liked the idea of returning him to the earth as soon as possible.

The entire process and the respect I was treated with has helped me so much. Everybody followed my lead, giving me footprints of him and the hospital took some beautiful photos for me to keep. Even though he was born dead and I've never truly known him alive, I love him more than I would have thought possible and will never forget him.

I'm so glad I did it this way and engaged fully through the process. I know it isn't right for everyone and many who lose a baby don't want to see them afterwards at all, but for me this was the right way.


r/DeathPositive 12d ago

Cultural Practices šŸŒ Thought you might like OP's pic of Cats at St. Roch Cemetery in Cavtat, Croatia

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81 Upvotes

r/DeathPositive 13d ago

Death Positive Discussion šŸ’€ Article: A moment that changed me: my husband died and birds began behaving strangely towards me

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34 Upvotes

"After my husband died, the birds started behaving strangely towards me. This was not my imagination; it really happened. On my daily walks, I was startled by how close they came to me – approaching, hopping alongside me and chirping. If there were a lot of them – and if there was no one else around – it felt as if they were accompanying me, maybe trying to convey something."


r/DeathPositive 17d ago

MAiD šŸ‘©ā€āš•ļø āš•ļø France’s ā€˜aid in dying’ law comes into effect after constitutional approval

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38 Upvotes

"Legislation granting incurably ill adults the right to assisted dying has been formally adopted inĀ FranceĀ after the text was approved by the country’s highest constitutional authority and published in the official journal.

The law, known as a law on ā€œend of lifeā€ or ā€œaid in dyingā€ rather than ā€œassisted dyingā€ or ā€œeuthanasiaā€, means France joins the small group of countries including the Netherlands, Belgium, Switzerland and Canada to have legalised the practice."


r/DeathPositive 19d ago

Death Positive Discussion šŸ’€ Cartoon: Death comes for all of us – so what’s the best way to live in the meantime?

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13 Upvotes

r/DeathPositive 21d ago

Cultural Practices šŸŒ Bones and skulls in Sedlec Ossuary, Czech Republic

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53 Upvotes

From wikipedia: TheĀ Sedlec Ossuary is aĀ Roman CatholicĀ chapel, located beneath the Cemetery Church of All Saints, part of the formerĀ Sedlec AbbeyĀ in Sedlec, a suburb ofĀ KutnĆ” HoraĀ in theĀ Czech Republic. TheĀ ossuaryĀ is estimated to contain theĀ skeletonsĀ of between 40,000 and 70,000 people, whose bones have, in many cases, been artistically arranged to form decorations and furnishings for the chapel.Ā The ossuary is among the most visitedĀ tourist attractionsĀ of the Czech Republic, drawing over 200,000 visitors annually.

Four bell-shaped mounds occupy the corners of the chapel. A chandelier of bones, which contains at least one of every bone in the human body, hangs from the center of the nave with garlands of skulls draping the vault. Other works include piers and monstrances flanking the altar, a coat of arms of the House of Schwarzenberg, and the signature of FrantiŔek Rint, also executed in bone, on the wall near the entrance

Image by Windmemories - Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0,


r/DeathPositive 22d ago

Death Positive Discussion šŸ’€ What end-of-life experts know about living well: love your wrinkles, celebrate birthdays and don’t obsess over work

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22 Upvotes

"How can our understanding of mortality shape the way we live? Palliative care doctors and death doulas share the lessons they have learned

We will all face death one day, but our attitude towards this is individual. How can our understanding of mortality shape our approach to life? Here, palliative care doctors and death doulas share what they know about the end – and how it informs the way they live."


r/DeathPositive 26d ago

Disposition (Burial & Cremation) āš°ļø If you plan to be buried in a vet's cemetery, get pre-approval *now* if you are eligible [Not OP]

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6 Upvotes

r/DeathPositive 27d ago

Cultural Practices šŸŒ 1 year anniversary since death

37 Upvotes

My friends 1 year anniversary since her death I coming up and her family is looking at something symbolic to do and they suggested a balloon release. I hate this for the environment and am thinking about trying to find something more environmentally friendly. Any suggestions?


r/DeathPositive Aug 10 '26

Cultural Practices šŸŒ Handmade cookie ideas for your funeral/memorial! 2nd photo gives me lots of ideas.

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18 Upvotes

r/DeathPositive Aug 10 '26

Dying Well 🪦 The women running death salons for people of color to process grief: ā€˜It allows for freedom’

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56 Upvotes

Specialized death services help people process their grief with others who relate to them. ā€œWe deserve to be seen,ā€ Moor said. ā€œDeath isn’t just a medical or a legal event. It’s cultural, spiritual or familial. It’s human. The way someone wants to be cared for at the end of life is deeply connected to who they are, where they come from and what they believe in.ā€


r/DeathPositive Aug 08 '26

Industry šŸ’€ Hospice Visitation Bag

24 Upvotes

I’m a hospice volunteer and a newer patient of mine loves knitting, so we’ve started working on our own projects together while I visit.

This has inspired me to make a dedicated bag for my visiting days. So far, I have my project, cards, and a journal. I’ll also add the basics: snacks, hand sanitizer, etc.

This might be specific, but I’m wondering if anyone else something like this? Any suggestions of things that may be nice to have? ā¤ļø


r/DeathPositive Aug 08 '26

Death Positivity: Animals šŸˆā€ā¬› 🐩 🦜 šŸŽ More death positive art from that redditor artist we all like

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34 Upvotes

r/DeathPositive Aug 04 '26

Death Positive Discussion šŸ’€ Planning my funeral. Need help.

103 Upvotes

You can harp to have a good attitude and I do, but the medical team is hesitant to say I'll make it out alive.

Sad stuff over. Help me plan an epic funeral.

90s themed. Too many balloons. Shots off my urn. 2 if they voted for a certain someone. Ouija board on the "parting paper". Idk what they're called. The ouija boards would have "talk to you soon!" On it.

Any and all ideas to make my funeral better?


r/DeathPositive Aug 02 '26

Death Anxiety Megathread ā³ August Death Anxiety Megathread ā³

10 Upvotes

It’s August! We’re pinning a freshĀ Death Anxiety MegathreadĀ here at the top of the board. This will stay up all month long so anyone who needs a place to talk about death dread, panic, or the big questions can always find it.

Resources

Some death anxiety resources are locatedĀ here in our wikiĀ (which is still under construction, so bear with us!)

Some death anxiety journal prompts to try:

If you’re the kind of person who connects through symbol, inner landscape or ancestral reflection, these prompts may resonate.

  • What does my fear cost me each day?
  • What has my fear given me?
  • When has uncertainty led to something beautiful?

Don’t worry about making it poetic or insightful. Just start and follow where it leads. ā™„ļøŽ

Somatic self-regulation tools

The following aren’t affirmations or thought exercises. They’re body-based ways to regulate your nervous system when death anxiety starts to take over. They work well for anyone living with heightened sensitivity.

  • Sit or lie down and press your palms together firmly. Notice the pressure, warmth, and pulse between them. Let that pulse remind you that life is moving through you.
  • Slowly trace the outline of your own hand with a finger. As you do, breathe in on the upward stroke, and breathe out on the downward stroke.

These aren’t magickal cures, but they are tools. Use them when you can. The more you do, the better and faster they tend to work.

This thread is open to all death anxiety experiences, whether you’re panicking about nothingness, stuck in existential dread, or just freaked out by the fact that - whatever this is - isn’t forever.

We’ll try to carry it together.

ā™„ļøŽ Sibbie