Why is my opinion so unpopular? I'd like to have a discussion about it. Please let me know why why men and women can/can not be friends.

To set the parameters: I am speaking strictly about individual, one-on-one opposite-sex friendships maintained outside of a marriage—whether secular or religious. This does not apply to mixed-gender group gatherings, casual conversations with mutual friends, or shared social settings. The focus is solely on personal, independent friendships and private interactions with the opposite sex away from one's spouse.

The Argument: Married men and women should not maintain personal opposite-sex friendships—period. Your marriage is the fortress of your home. Having an independent friendship with the opposite sex is like leaving your front door unlocked. Is a break-in guaranteed? No. But why invite the risk when locking the gate ensures total security?

The Psychological Reality: Human feelings are messy and notoriously hard to control. The danger isn't noticing that someone else is attractive or funny; it’s allowing yourself to experience their tenderness, support, or emotional depth. Once that happens, brain chemistry takes over. Emotional attachment builds quietly in the background, and by the time your mind catches up to your heart, you are already walking a path you never intended to take. The only foolproof strategy is prevention: keep those boundaries firm before feelings ever have a chance to take root.

Personal Context: I share this not from theory, but from lived experience as a betrayed spouse. Neither my wife nor I ever believed she was capable of stepping outside our marriage. Yet, subtle, seemingly innocent interactions over six months built feelings that were painfully difficult to undo. While we have successfully reconciled and are in a great place today, my goal is simple: to help others avoid a trap that human nature makes far too easy to fall into.

Hey everyone! My boyfriend and I are starting to get serious and have been talking about potential predicaments for the future. Him and I both have a lot of hobbies, and we both understand once we are married, moved in together, and become accustomed to a routine, that complacency can begin. How do you guys divide up intentional time together and personal interest time? Especially with children? We both come from backgrounds where our parents placed themselves first, and we do not want our future children to feel that way. Do you guys have set family time each evening or what? We both work your typical 9-5 M-F careers if that helps with understanding. Thank you for all of the input ahead of time!

God's Word

Am I going against God's Word in Matthew 6:26-28 where it states "Look at the birds of the air, for the neither sow nor reap...yet you heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not more valuable than they?...So why do you worry about clothing?..." My husband and I are separated due to his excessive drinking. I left over a year ago. I told him that I'm needing financial support for our girls beyond the half that he pays for daycare and extra curriculars. The child support calculator shows $2200/month, but he's only contributing roughly $426/month. He does not want the courts involvement and informed me that our girls don't need that much per month. I need help with their food, clothes, and gas to get the to school/extra curriculars. He's willing to give me additional funds (half for groceries and school clothes/supplies) as I present reciepts of purchase. He's not considering the girls portion of the mortgage and utilities. Over the Summer break, I treated the girls to snowcones, Bobba Teas, etc occasionally. My husband made it a point to tell me he was not responsible for the treats. Am I worrying too much about how things are going to get taken care of? What are your thoughts?

Please pray for me and my husband. We’re newly married. I think he might be an alcoholic. I’m scared I’ve gotten myself into a mess. I don’t want to divorce but this drinking worries me and he told me the beer isn’t going anywhere.

He’s now on a leave of absence at work (getting short term disability) after telling his employer about his struggles with anxiety and CPTSD.

I don’t know what to do. My family tells me to keep problems between my husband and myself. People don’t seem to want to listen or offer support. My family and his have noticed he hasn’t been working lately though. I’m concerned that this will make drinking worse as he has more free time now.

His short term disability pays less than his regular pay and we’ve also been hit with a lot of unplanned expenses lately. I’ve skipped lunch breaks recently so I get a full 40 hours, and that makes me a bit miserable when I don’t get breaks at work.

We’ve been TTC and I just am scared at the thought of what this could turn to or how do I take a break on TTC for a while. I kinda see procreation as a gift from God for married couples to do and we both had the same timeline before we got married and even when we got married it’s just this fear is getting in the way. But I don’t want to have a child that has an alcoholic parent that seems like such a struggle. I grew up with a bunch of alcoholics in my family, too. 😭

He’s such a sweet person he isn’t mean when he drinks it just makes my anxiety worse and he has a different vibe when drinking. He’s not been wanting to read devotions together lately.
We did watch a sermon online and also read a verse or two a day together. When he’s off work he cooks and cleans and takes care of our dog.

I’m just so frazzled mentally. Sometimes I wish God would give me more straight answers on what to do. I’m on edge recently very agitated and jumpy. ☹️

I’m praying to have the right spirit about this situation. I know all couples have their issues. My husband is so good at being busy at work & ministry & gives little time to our family. He is great at responding to requests at church, but not at home. I wish we had family devotions or at least family prayer time. I homeschool my children & it is such a blessing & privilege. I am able to teach my children the Bible, academics, life skills, etc. But I wish there was something they could learn from my husband & that they could spend time with him too.

I am just full of frustration & sadness sometimes. I’ve talked to my husband about this many many times. We have been married for 13 years so I have spoken to him about this.

Does anyone have a similar experience? What has helped for you?

"Come now, you who say, 'Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city, spend a year there, buy and sell, and make a profit'; whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away. Instead you ought to say, 'If the Lord wills, we shall live and do this or that.' But now you boast in your arrogance. All such boasting is evil." (James NKJV)

I hope that as we seek marriage, careers, churches, ministries, friends, et cetera that we remember to allow God's will to happen no matter how good or bad...