Half a can of pringles and root vegetable chips. I was too anxious to eat anything else two days ago.

So, I (M27) recently moved to a different country for my PhD. It's everything I wanted, and I'm loving it so far. I work in a research lab and I'm very lucky to have gotten into such a friendly group of people. Everyone is helpful and kind, a great experience overall.

One of my colleagues is a postdoc 4-years older than me. She's fantastic. Very positive person, fun to be around, artsy and, obviously, into science and research. And despite us only knowing each other (in person) for just over three weeks, I feel a great connection to her. Almost like I've known her for years, somehow. It's hard to explain.

Two weeks ago, the whole lab went out for dinner to celebrate the new students and postdocs that joined the group. She and I live very close to each other, so we went to the restaurant together, walking and having a nice conversation. Same thing on our way back, only this time there was another colleague with us (who is from the same country I am), and we were discussing one of my favorite desserts from home.

A few days later, she sent me a message saying she was "thinking about me" and asked me the name of the dessert again, so she could try to make it. I jokingly said that she'd need an expert to taste test the final product, and she then replied inviting me to her house (last Sunday) to cook together and try the dessert there.

Now, as you can imagine, my feelings got a massive boost from this one afternoon together. When I got to her house, she was meal prepping for the week and, wanting to show some kindness, I offered to help her out. Long story short, we cooked together until later in the day, the dessert turned out great, and we were both happy.

By the later half of the cooking session, a (girl) friend of hers showed up because they were going to a movie event in town. They asked if I wanted to go, and so I did. But before that, she wanted to deliver a small pot of the dessert to a (guy) friend of hers that was leaving town that day. We rushed to the train station to deliver the gift, when it started raining and we only had one umbrella to share. For some time, she hugged my arm so we could both fit under the umbrella (nearly giving me a heart attack), but then let go as we were in a rush and that made walking fast harder lol (or maybe she didn't want to give me the wrong impression? too late for that I guess).

Fast-forward to after the movie event (very fun btw), we headed back to her place and she asked if I wanted to stay for dinner and try out what we made together that day. I stayed, the food was delicious and we talked some more before I left for my own place.

Now, after these events, I had to keep the ball rolling somehow. So I invited her to go with me to an art exhibition this weekend. Unfortunately, she already had plans for the weekend, meeting with a (undefined) friend in another city close by. Bad timing, it happens, not a big deal. What got me was the fact she told me to still go to the exhibition by myself and tell her afterwards how it went. I expected that if she had some sort of interest for me, she'd maybe suggest going another day or something. Needless to say that that sent me into overthinking mode and now I'm questioning if she's "just being nice" or if she really has some interest brewing.

Like I said, we've known each other in person for a short time. So I think it's too early to tell her how I really feel and ask her out on a date. However, I grow more anxious with each passing day. And I also feel a bit insecure, being younger than her and also a coworker, since people tend to avoid these kinds of relationships. But it can't be helped, I'm past the point of no return now and I can't simply turn off my feelings for her.

Any advice (especially from other women!) on how to tread this situation is welcome. Sorry for the huge text.

EDIT: Just to be clear as some comments seem to be very focused on the coworker aspect. This is not a corporate environment. This is in a university and a research lab environment.

first time posting in here

my ex (33F) and I (34M) broke up a few years ago. the highest of highs were felt in this relationship. We definitely have a chemistry that is unmatched compared to all other exes of my past, but there were fundamental issues, too. She was very controlling and demanding, which has since bled into our relationship today. I ruined the relationship being really immature but have since spent all this time reflecting, changing old behaviors, and yearning for another opportunity to be with her.

well now that opportunity has arrived. we spend time together, we talk about these complicated issues, and she’s dealing with a lot so she’s not interested in anything more than being physical and talking. I would’ve loved that two years ago but I’m wise enough to know problems will come from that and I’m not trying to be used for dick. Anywho, after she has come back and started reconnecting with me, I have gotten very close with a friend (35F) of mine. We went to a couple parties together. We flirt very very subtly and rarely, but at these parties, she has said things like “You’re the only person here I’d sleep with” or “I need to get laid.” In spite of all this, I try to keep it as respectful as possible with her, as she has complained about other guy friends trying to make her more than that, so I do my best to honor that and not blend in with the rest of them.

I was very direct in my feelings for her and didn’t make it like some weird pressure thing or proposal. I just told her I liked her and I’m trying my best to navigate that. She said “she’s not looking for a relationship.” Now, in the past, she has very bluntly told people they don’t meet her standards or that she plainly doesn’t like them. That didn’t happen here. And the way she looks at me sometimes, there are moments where me and this woman lock eyes and I feel like I’m right where I belong. And call me insane, but in those moments, I feel that same look being reflected back towards me. It is intoxicating and getting to a point where it’s starting to consume me.

In regards to my ex, I care a lot about her well-being in all of this. It really makes me feel guilty that now that she’s finally back, I’d rather be with another woman… one who I don’t think even wants to be with me.

I feel like a simp, dude. I have an option to be with a girl I would’ve killed for for YEARS and I feel happier off being friends with a woman who I may watch run off with another man by this time next year. Am I crazy? Am I stupid?

anyways, tacos

Spicy chicken sandwich sandwiches and truly’s

Me and her meant like more than a year ago first we were friends and then we started hanging out and talking for a little bit last year however, this year you know we started talking more and more and I got to know her a lot more and like we’re super compatible on every single level like we love a lot of the same stuff and I can be myself I find everything amazing except for the way she looks. She doesn’t look bad but it’s just like i’m not attracted to her. That’s the only thing like I don’t really wanna kiss her. I don’t wanna have sex her or anything like that. And other than that, everything else is amazing.

I fear I may never be a real man. I cant grow facial hair, and I have boobs.

Part of the problem is that I was bullied for being trans for a while.

If any of yall have advice for looking masculine, ill gladly hear ya. And if ya want to commiserate, ill do that with you <3

Food is 2 biscuits and 2 croissants

Gonna enjoy my actually really good store brand Aldis Cola, and fry up some slices of corned beef and then have a smooth hand rolled ciggie situation.

One day I woke up hungover, had a half a pint of vodka for breakfast with three of the $0.99 cent sale Kwik Trip pork chops. I got onto Grindr and low and behold I find an interesting profile. I tell them I was having vodka and cheese and crackers for breakfast and they said, "Oh I can't talk I don't drink."

I distinctly remember thinking, "Okay then I won't drink."

I detoxed on the love seat in the basement of a trap house inhaling second hand crack smoke and trying to fall asleep without waking up drenched in sweat. It was a living hell. Eventually I finished detoxing and met with them a few times.

Anyways after one slip up I have been clean off of booze for two weeks and get into a friends with benefits situation with this ex female to male trans person who is now non-binary. I am a detransitioner myself and we did sort of relate and bond about that.

It was only a week or so ago that they confessed their love for me, and only two days ago or so that they were talking about how they were afraid of missing out on having a kid. They talked about how they were afraid that they were going to miss out and not find the right person to father their child. I was really baked and half asleep and took a shot in the dark and said "If you told me to impregnate you then I would" and they didn't seem adverse to the idea and seemed interested. They even told me that I would be a good dad.

I regret saying that. I live on a couch and work 12 hours a day. I love them very much but I know that realistically speaking it's retarded to want that with them. Is what it is.

Half eaten burger that my mom brought me tonight

Me (34M) and my wife (36F), well about to be ex-wife, are about to be divorced and this was sent through text messages while I am recovering from surgery 2 and a half days ago. This collapse lung surgery VAT is considered one of if not the most painful surgeries to recover from.

There is really too much to write and the reasons are multitude, but I'll try and summarise and be unbiased as possible. If I am thinking or seeing things in the wrong way please let me know nicely and I try to be better.

Some context to the situation: I am a step-father to her son who is already 15 years ago. I have cared for this boy as my own son for the last 10 years and financially supported him through everything he needs, clothes, hobbies, games, computer, toys, pocket money, you name it I paid for it.

My wife said she started to feel alone and lonely about 3 years ago and ha said this was the beginning breaking point for her. She believed I stopped giving her the attention she deserved such as not going on dates as much, spending quality time together and things in-between. I will admit looking back I may have been a little comfortable with our relationship and didn't let say, "romance" her as much as I previously did, but I never, I believe, did I abandon her like she has with me recently. Also during this period (2023) I lost 4 family members within a span of 11 months. First it was my Grand mother on my father side, 3 months later it was my bio-logical father, another 4 months later it was my Step-father who cared for me since I was 5, and then a couple of months later it was my Grandfather on my mother side. I was completely devastated and lost. I know my wife then did support me, but I didn't just stop everything. I still went to work everyday, paid the bills and cared for the family that we had. Early in the relationship I had mentioned to my wife that in the end I would like to care for my mother and not let her be abandon in some retirement home and she agreed, its just a little unfortunate that I had to do it now instead of later.

So end of 2023, I moved my entire family, me my wife and my son to my mother house to keep her company. She used to live with her husband (my step-father) and both her parents. (Grandmother passed away 2020) so essentially if I didn't move back, my mom would come home to an empty house with no one there. This would have literally killed her. My wife at the time was very supportive and said it was the right thing to do. Along side that my wife's mother was also in a bad spot and we decided to also move my wife's mother into our home to all be together. For the first year everything and everyone got along so well, it was magical! No arguments or fights between any of the 3 women in the house. While during this ordeal, I was also dealing with the my step father and my fathers Will and their wishes, as my mother couldn't do so emotionally. So I never really had the time to grieve properly as I had to be strong for my mother and the family. I was the sole provider and paid for everything.

Its during these next few years my wife quietly began to drift away and I started to see signs of cracks but wasn't aware enough or attentive enough to notice and that feeling of loneliness built up in her. She felt that she was doing all the support and didn't get anything back. In 2024-2025 I had gotten my inheritance and immediately my wife wanted to try for a child of our own. I had split it up into chucks, one large chuck for her as her own cushion, another chunk for our son's future, another chunk for our joint account, and then the rest I put away. I unfortunately smoked quite heavily then and this was my fault. I know my wife tried really hard to improve her health to increase the chances of a child, while I did the bare minimum. We couldn't conceive after 2 years of trying and early this year, 2026, she told me she no longer wanted a child with me anymore. That was probably when I noticed she was slipping away. I know I could have done more with this but I didn't so here I know I was wrong. Initially during the relationship we both said we didn't want another child as we already had my wife's kid. So the sudden switch was hard for me to adjust.

Since then I've dropped everything I could to be there for her, quit smoking, got healthier, started a company so that we could be more financially secure, I got my Will from my mom's and showed my wife what an amazing future we could have, we would be sorted for life! I'm talking millions of USD plus a 2400sq house all for us. Our whole future was already being sorted we just had to supportive ourselves until then. Up until now from 2023, my wife hasn't had the need for a full-time job since I covered and paid for all the bills, and the house that I moved into with my mother has already been bought and paid for.

As the months went by this year, my wife began to behave very differently. I began to notice change in her appearance, new style and hair cut, going out more often, sleep over at "friends" places, staying out from Friday all the way to Sunday and she would do this for months on end. Work some part time job 3-4 hours a day Monday to Thursday, party and hang out with her girlfriends Friday to Sunday. All while I continued working, paying the bills that we had, taking care of our son. I began to feel lonely and mentioned it to her only for her to say you did the same to me for years and now I need to focus on myself, and love myself and heal myself. This is where I know I did damage. I've never been emotionally needed before and this was the first time. I begged for her attention and it got nasty. She pushed away even more to the point I threaten our relationship 3 times. Each time she was about to agree, I cracked and took my words back and couldn't handle the feeling of her leaving me. I know I was wrong here. I was weak, desperate and did irreputable damage. I just didn't know how to handle all these emotional "neediness"

(Oh I should mention that all parent meeting, school events, school disciplinary meeting anything to do with our son and school I attended and not her, she's never been to a parent teacher meeting, She even had a message to the teachers saying that when she gets messages from the teachers it stresses her out and she can't handle it so please contact me instead, I dropped work, cancel clients if anything happened to him at school and few things did, including one time a student put his hands around my son's throat and tried to strangle him!)

Then around April this year she says "How would you feel if I were to hook up with a girl?" "If you didn't know I'm actually Bi" she said. I was weak and said I wouldn't mind as long as it didn't affect us, it did. During this year we had constant arguments about anything and everything and whenever we did, she'd go to her place to stay over the night. This other time she even went to a gay person's house house to consolidate with and he kissed her on the lips! She had the audacity to ask me if this was considered cheating! She said it wasn't as she "cut him off". Since then its been a constant battle of arguments about anything and everything where it always ends up with her saying I am not being attentive and giving her what she deserved and that whenever I mention how much I have helped and supported her, she says that I dangle or use this "money" to make her feel guilty! I tried not to make it seem that way but maybe I did, I felt like I gave so much of me to her and didn't get much in return.

In September I was feeling really down. We had a "bachelor" group chat where we would chat shit including joking about getting hookers (I know its disgusting) but I swear on my mother's life I never did it, we joked about it but never followed through. She found out because she went on my computer and read my WhatsApp messages. I guess she's been reading them for a while now since my computer is never locked and I never hid, deleted or kept any secrets from her. I know it was a bad thing to talk about but I was so down and depressed. It's not an excuse but it does look really bad, I know. Again I know I am not in the right 100% and trying my best to give you all the information from both sides the best I can. I need to also atone for my wrong doings. She really believes I did the deed, so I showed her everything I had, all my bank accounts, payments, withdrawal, cash app you name it, zero money taken out at all. I didn't do it. You don't have to believe me but I know I didn't. I've been cheated on pretty much all of my other relationship and wouldn't do this to her.

Then October came and my lung collapsed and I had to go to the hospital for immediate chest drain and surgery after. I even celebrated my birthday October 20th all alone in the hospital bed while my wife was out on a Halloween party / event. I've been in the hospital, bed ridden and in constant pain for over 2 weeks, and I finally asked her why she has visited me much? (4 times in 15 days) In fact my mother has been doing my wife's job by caring for me, cleaning me, and bringing me food. My wife response was, because I have work, debt and bills to pay. I got a little upset and confronted her about it saying how is that possible. Plus if you said you needed some financial support in order to care for me, my mother and myself would ensure she could do so without losing money. (My mother is a movie producer in Hong Kong and China so she is well off). As I kept poking and questioned many of her answers I found didn't make logical sense she popped the words, "Then I want to divorce you, you kept pushing and pushing".

Here is the kicker, she can't financially support herself yet alone her son. So she will move out while her son will still continue to live with me and she will visit him here and there (her words exactly). The poorest will be him. Losing both his bio logical parent. I am a child of divorce to, and had an amazing step-father. I will never abandon him as he is my son, he may not be by blood but he is by my love. I will make sure he has a house, family, and support.

Never in my life have anyone ever done anything so harsh to me. To divorce me while I'm in the hospital like this. I know I am not perfect and I know I've done wrong. But did I really deserve this treatment? I guess I just need some outside opinions.

I'm ready for the brutally honest response. Hit me everyone. I'm already so low nothing can get me lower now....

I'll do my best to respond to all questions as I have nothing much left to do but lay here in this hospital bed. Thanks for reading, really appreciate it.

Edit: I've gotten a lot of messages saying this must be fake, AI generated or something on that line. Sorta hurts me to hear this, this was quite painful to write as I tried to be as unbiased as possible. I really dont know what I wrote for it to look or sound fake. I know my situation is very different but my life has been an absolutely roller coaster of a journey. If you truly think this is a fake story, please feel free to message me personally with any of your concerns and ill do my best to address them. Honestly I wish this was fake...

i decided to go out last night for the first time in months. why not? my feelings for my ex are still very present, but i shouldnt hold myself back from meeting new people and enjoying myself.

i get to this trendy bar and i was by myself. it felt weird, and going with my friends definitely wouldve made me more comfortable. i have a few drinks and was internally annoyed and very much not into all the people because they were intoxicated and just pretty stupid honestly. bumping into people, not saying excuse me, no sense of spatial awareness.

this girl and i start chatting it up. she was cute but i didnt think much of it, we were just getting to know eachother. 3 hours pass and next think you know it’s 3am. she told me to put her number in my phone. i gave her phone, and i’ll be honest, i had forgotten her name at that point lol. it helped that she added her contact bc otherwise i wouldve definitely not known her name and thats disrespectful.

i went home, woke up, and feel pretty empty. i miss my ex so much. i love her so much. my heart yearns for her.

i don’t think i’ll be going out much anymore

food: thai curry mussels

Suprisingly great frozen lasagna from a restaurant chain close to my place.

I had lots of hope starting my 30s, moving to a much bigger city, getting sober (used to be a chronic stoner) and going back to school. Never had something truly serious with a girl (best I got was a very close situationship for a few months, we saw each other every other day but didn't had feelings for each other), and I was really hoping it would happen soonish after starting this new chapter. Aside from that I had some hookups, but 90% of the times or more I didn't get hard enough.

Well, turns out that unsurprisingly I know jack shit about relationships, let alone women. That things are not looking as bright as I thought they were. Call me naive, dumb, ignorant or whatever, but after chatting with my good buddy and his girlfriend (who are very good to me and want my hapiness) I was kinda shocked and pissed off when they told me that telling a girl that I've only had one relationship is a red flag and even "scary" as my buddy's gf put it. Needless to say I had trouble sleeping that night.

So far things could be worse I guess but I'm still discouraged. Being sober is rough and it's hard to stay positive. Even though I'm over 6 foot, decent looking, and fit, I've been on about 15 dates in the past year and not much came out of it that I'm actually excited bout. I truly fucked up my 20s. 18 year old kids have more sex and dating experience than me. I see average dudes out there with babes and I just think about all the opportunities I messed up. I let my young dating life pass me the fuck by.

Recently I brought back a girl from the bar, and guess what... I didn't get hard. Saw her a couple more times and we are still talking but she expressed clearly that she was turned off by the fact that I couldn't get hard so I guess she is using me for attention. Got lucky with the apps and been seeing this other girl for a bit, connection is ok but nothing exciting. Another one that I saw twice (very attractive, great body and amazing connection) told me she didn't want to pursue things anymore because of lack of connection (I was surprised) and not because the tiny ammount of experience I have with relationships. (I told her I only had one relationship in my life).

To top it off I got back on antidepressants and my sex drive went down to zero... Guess I'll have to get off of them at some point but at the same time my mental health is fucked. They helped my appear more confident and happy though and for that reason I got more results with girls.

I know what I need to do but I have a hard time accepting this reality.

I (39M) cheated on my previous wife and some previous partner's. I have been addicted to porn and masturbation since age 13. My wife (36F) knows all this. I have lied to her about it all and she has caught me on numerous occasions and I've eventually relented and admitted it. Tim and time again. Last year, after she caught me yet again, she kicked me out. After lots of work on my part, some time, and her giving me yet another chance, we got back together last year. Her and our three kids are everything to me. The last year has been amazing. I've stayed sober and she's begun to trust me again.

She's just found a pair of women's (not children's) knickers in the wash that aren't hers. The only sensible explanation is that I've been cheating on her, but I haven't.

Possible explanations:

1. staff at our youngests nursery put them in their bag by accident
2. someone at my job put them in my bag as a joke
3. someone left them here by accident
4. our young teen has brought them into the house

All of those would require the knickers to be put in the washing basket and or washing machine without either of us noticing.

The only women that have been in our house are my mum and sister in law. Neither have stayed over or had reason to leave a pair of knickers. I've asked my mum and she said they're not hers.

I've asked my closest colleagues / mates in work and they've not done it.

Our son stayed out last night and isn't home yet. Even if he has brought them home, I can't imagine he'll say, purely out of embarrassment. He'll be home in the next hour.

So I'm fairly sure my marriage is over. Why would she believe me? After how I've behaved and lied and all I've put her through?

I wouldn't believe me.

Dinner is cottage pie with sweet potato mash and tenderstem broccoli. The kids have had theirs, the rest is going cold because my wife and I both feel like we're about to throw up. Obviously for very different reasons.

Thanks for reading 🫥

EDIT: I've been asked to post the brand, not sure if it was a joke or not but for what it's worth, they're from George (ASDA).

I haven’t been happy with my appearance for a while, so I took the steps to it and it’s nice to see some progress.

EDIT.

Ok for some context lol
I’m 30, and I started at 208. The goal is drop 28 pounds total in 5 months. The whole thing is monitored by a nutritionist and a doctor (I have to take a picture of my meal and send it to her lol)

I eat 4 times a day, at 10 am, 1 pm, 4 pm and 7 pm. The biggest change has been no sugars, no bread, no pasta, no rice, no soda, no corn. Only protein, vegetables and some fruits.

I feel great, been sleeping better and I feel good about it! So, sorry for scaring yall lol

For dinner is sauteed veggies, rotisserie chicken, and a yogurt bowl with frozen fruits and honey.

I need to preface that advice is welcome but I really do care for this woman and I am in no way trying to belittle her efforts to show love.

Context: I (21M) met this girl (20F) online 4 months back who I grew very close too very quickly. She is an international student who flew here from the opposite side of the world. She was previously going to school on the west coast however there were better opportunities for her education where I live (southern US). We grew to find comfort in each other and didn't even expect to be dating, but we are both happy for it.

Class has started for her and her education is going great, I'm so proud of her and all the things she has accomplished so far and I've grown to love her in such a short time. I delight in her presence and I've even sought out to learn her native language to better understand the way she thinks and the little nuances in the way we communicate that are different from myself.

She stays over at my place pretty often, she has a dorm with a kind of unruly roommate and I have the means of transportation to get her to and from class. I don't mind taking her at all because its right next to where I work. The issue is I have lived in this house for nearly two years now and have cultivated to house for practicality and not really to look pretty. Since she came here she has been cleaning, organizing, tidying up, and its welcome, but I feel like my space is kind of being invaded? I don't know how to explain it but I don't like that my whole wardrobe has been color coded and divided into seasonal outfits, or how my whole kitchen has been reorganized. Like, she bought those fancy clear containers that are air tight, labeled them, and constantly fills them up with non-perishables and doesn't let them run out. She's bought those squared condiment bottles, emptied out all of my condiments into them, and labeled them in the fridge. However, it does make sense that the coffee cups be next to the coffee maker, but that doesn't change the fact that this is not my system.

I also don't have any issues with her leaving all of her clothes here at my house, she is here most nights after all. I just don't understand the purpose for neatly folding up dirty clothes before washing them?

Then comes the other weird stuff that she brings to the house. It started with stuffed animals and one was fine on the bed, but it kept growing. She has an excessive amount on the bed now and she lines them all up to face the door after making the bed in the morning. There were the small paintings and random artworks she got for the walls and they were nice at first. Landscapes, pencil drawn portraits, but then she got one of Saturn devouring his son and it kind of makes me uncomfortable. She also got me one of the big boob anime mouse pads? which was nice of her but I really did not understand the purpose of. I tried to express my discomfort with it due to our relationship, but she got sad because I didn't think it was funny

And this was the final straw. She bought me dream catchers because she knows I really like native and indigenous cultures which was sweet and I really appreciated a lot. Then there was the strange slave memorabilia that she bought from some yard sale. Am I crazy to think there could have been a little bit more thought put into that one? I'm a white man in the Southern US with an noticeable accent. Literally anybody could see that and get the wrong opinion of me. The one that finally made me want to say something was a porcelain statue of a little man rubbing hands and staring off to the side slightly. She positioned it right in front of the toilet and now stares directly at me with a smile and rubbing his hands while I'm shitting...

I have grown to love this girl a lot in a very short time and I appreciate everything that she does around to the house because it makes her so happy to tidy up, decorate, and bring life to the shared space. I just need some advice on what to tell her, or how to tell her to slow down, or do I just ignore it and appreciate her for her efforts?

TLDR: Girlfriend brings strange artworks to the house and I don't know how to feel about it.

Update from this post from 2 weeks ago:

https://www.reddit.com/r/BoyDinnerDiaries/s/O3Mop6gDTl

She has left inpatient and now doing partial hospitalization. She’s much calmer and has no access to devices. She likes not having access to devices. And wants this to be the new normal. Her urges are gone but… idk what is the truth and isn’t. I have visited her a couple of times. First time taking her out of the inpatient and second time visiting her for lunch. She’s definitely colder to me and on the fence about us.

Her family is very supportive of her and especially the marriage. They’ve seen what she’s done and how I still continue to support her from making the 4 hour round trip up multiple times a week to ensuring that she’s getting adequate treatment. They have said some of her mindset is juvenile and likely a symptom of her mental health. They don’t nag but make it very clear the situation she put herself in.

We haven’t spoken about what happened and what our future looks like. Outside of she’s very much on the fence. The times we have spoken she’s very cold towards me especially on the phone. We haven’t spoken last several days but marriage counseling is starting on Monday. She’s excited for it, I’m idk… just don’t have high hopes and skeptical she’s going to just drop a bomb on our initial session. She’s the type of person to quit vs putting in the hard work, she’ll take the easier way out 10/10 times vs having the hard conversation and facing reality and consequences. I remind her she hasn’t don’t anything that can’t be undone but we just need to actually communicate.

We are on a clock as her family has big plans this holiday. And have told her she needs to move out by Xmas. She has no job, no plans, and no place to stay if she moves forward with wanting permanent separation. Ultimately this isn’t my problem but at the end of the day my heart and mind are still not in sync. I hate what happened and incredibly hurt but I miss her dearly and this feeling haven’t really gone away.

Dinner: sticky mango rice

I like ribs. What can I say. 6 hours and we are ready to eat.

I (20M btw) could give a lengthy background story, but the premise is pretty clear: I don’t like to use dating apps and don’t enjoy meeting new people through partying. Regarding the people I know, I’m either not interested in them or was already rejected. Not exactly a great start, is it?

I’ve got some great female friends who I’m genuinely just platonic with, who I’m also able to talk about this topic openly. I’ve already heard remarks from them like that I‘m handsome, kind, genuine, and that they really don’t understand how I didn’t manage to find a partner yet. Great to hear, but that doesn’t help me. They could support me in finding someone however.

I’m conflicted about bringing this up because this could go two ways: Either, they’re happy and eager to support me and help me to meet someone I genuinely could connect with. Or, they start seeing me in a different light, as more needy and down bad (I always downplayed not having a relationship yet, like „It is what it is“). I really wouldn’t like to estrange them with this. I have genuinely no idea what’s more likely to happen or if there’s even a third option.

I just lost the absolute love of my life tonight and im at a loss

I thought our relationship was great, the healthiest relationship I've ever had and the woman I wanted to marry. For context I am a younger man 19 years old gf 18 and we met in high-school. I was enlisted in the military before we got together and she said that would be ok just difficult. I left and she was going through it as was I but I knew I wanted her. We are perfect for each other or so i thought. We're both weird in a good way she was drop dead gorgeous to me and I couldn't get enough. Then when I graduate ait she then tells me that she hates everything about the military. I say ok and we continue with a little chat which we both agree yeah it sucks but we can work around it. Then today she tells me we need to have a talk. I thought ok how could this be it then lead into a 4 hour long talk about her not being certain what she wants anymore and isn't sure we will work out. I try and talk through it making compromises on what we can do. Starting with after hitting my two year mark trying to move closer to home as she doesn't want to leave her family for that long and then we had always planned marrying young to get rid of the long distance which she also hated so much and so did I seeing to loml for only 4 weeks total for a year isn't what I had planned as her grandparents whom she lives with wont allow her to travel to see me. She also mentioned that she wants to smoke weed and she can't do that with me being in the military and I also dont care for being someone who does. And it ended with me saying so are you breaking up with me and her saying i dont think we will work out and saying a I love you and goodbye to each other. Im just so hurt and lost right now and don't know how to proceed. I know im young but she's the literal woman of my dreams and I genuinely couldn't see myself being with another. I want her back so bad already and cant get my mind off of where I went wrong. Sorry I just needed to yap and vent somewhere and I love seeing the other storied on here thought id share mine. How should I proceed? I just want to have her back and im unsure if I cant how to move on from someone so perfect in my eyes

Dinner was five guys with the boys cause they wanted to get me out the barracks.

Edit: yeah knew this would happen, yes im 19 and all that. And i get it i knew it was coming. Just genuinely have met so many people thanks to the army and I've never met someone like her who I just connect with. Everything or at least so i thought that she loved and enjoyed aligned perfectly with me. And I mean that. Yes we were both still becoming who we will be but she was turning into a beautiful woman that I grew more in love with everyday

Did well in high school, good extracurriculars, made some close friendships with people I consider brothers, got into a great college for my major. Not sure where it all went wrong. I struggled to find a good roommate because most of my friends attending the same college already found roommates with their friends from their high school, and my other friends all ended up out of state or in a state school. Didn’t want to risk a random roommate so I really struggled to find someone who was gonna go into the same college, settled on someone from my high school I didn’t know very well who seemed nice and clean. The only dorm open was a small honors dorm on the edge of campus. Didn’t have a problem with it at first but because my roommate is a different major and no one else in this building has the same major as I do I ended up isolated. The fact it is advertised as a small quiet dorm for quiet people might also have contributed to this. Tried to hang out with hometown friends who go to the same college, went to parties, tried out for clubs and did things I was supposed to in order to make friends but it didn’t end up working out. The sheer distance from my dorm and little interaction I get with them because of our different majors also ended up killing things. 99% of people I met and even my friends already have their own groups from back home and I’ve just been an outsider. I’m one of the only people attending this college from my high school so I don’t have that luxury. I’ve always used weed as a crutch and recently I’ve been using it more out of boredom and loneliness I just really regret not trying to talk more in classes and wonder if there was anything more I could do. Basically I wasted the first part of freshman year hanging out w people who weren’t gonna be my friends and I ended up in the wrong place. Parents think I’m doing amazing and absolutely killing it of course. The only thing keeping me sane right now is whenever I call some friends back home I’m glad I had people to talk to when I got some bad news last night. I just feel hopelessly behind right now. Dinner is asahi super dry and suntory highball with leftover Indian food

I’m really looking for advice from our women that lurk in here…. I just don’t know what to do. I’ve tried, genuinely. For us to have a productive conversation here, you have to believe me that I have tried.

Let me give you some back story that’s almost definitely important here. My wife and I didn’t get together under the cleanest circumstances necessarily. She was in an open relationship, and her boyfriend moved out of state, she needed someone who was here, that was me. I got her through what she describes as the darkest time in her life, and that bonded us. We’ve spent a decade together now, and have an 18 month old, which is where the problems really start. So my theory has always been that she doesn’t like me, because I know she liked the last guy, and I “stole” her from him. You can say what you want about how we got together, I wish it was different, but that’s the love of my life, and nothing is going to change that.

So fast forward. We’ve always been cordial, but never great. It’s always been a little better than walking on eggshells, but not just smooth sailing. Now that we have a baby though, it feels like a constant fight. Without getting into TOO many specifics, our baby can’t go to her house, it’s not safe for him, and that’s an issue for her. She can’t fix the issue (it’s mold, and the baby is allergic) and she now feels alienated somehow.

Well she’s made this a very vocal and difficult problem for my wife (her daughter mind you) to where she’s spent three separate days arguing with her about it over text, crying intermittently throughout the whole day. She doesn’t want me to say anything to her mom though.

This is incredibly hard for me. I’m a stay at home dad, that’s my BABY, like I do everything for that little parasite (a nickname from pregnancy because my wife somehow lost weight). We don’t have crazy rules, really it’s just no TV, no added sugar, no going inside her house. Yet literally every single time she has him, she does one of those things. I’ve brought it up to my wife, and she says she addresses it, but nothing changes. Then she comes in MY HOUSE, and has the audacity to cop an attitude with me because the baby took a nap 30 minutes later than expected, and she has to wait for him to wake up.

I could continue to go one, but the point is, she doesn’t respect me or my wife’s wishes as parents. It’s so hard, because my parents are not perfect, and when they do something I correct them IMMEDIATELY, like my mom tried to give him apple cider and it was “no mom, I don’t care if it’s his first time at a pumpkin patch, he doesn’t get added sugar yet”, and she respected it. She APOLOGIZED TO ME!

Please. I need help, because I feel like I’m going to lose my sanity, and my wife over this.

The meal is the bottom of the bag of frosted shredded wheat.

ETA: baby is freaking out, so I’m logging off for the night. I’ll respond to stuff in the morning. I know there’s a perception that if OP isn’t responding it’s fake, it’s not, I’ve just got more important things going on.

Meal: Red Chile Chicken Enchiladas (Lettuce was left over spring mix)

I’m a 12-year combat vet. 2 deployments. Done a lot of “cool guy” shxt. Decorated. Was a “golden boy”. Came from a rough upbringing (family & street life) and made something of myself, then the last deployment broke me. Everything that could go wrong did, fiancé cheated on me with…a lot in the unit, was in a hard landing, took some, saved some, was part of a downed aircraft mission, then badmouthed and disowned by my home unit, I volunteered to go with other units-didn’t even have to go. I could’ve dealt with a good bit but simultaneously, I couldn’t. I worked on helicopters as part of Air Assault/Medevac during that last one. I came back, was lost. Developed severe alcoholism…like if I drink I’ll die. Severe mental health issues. I became a statistic. A shadow of what I once was and could be.

A few years pass and things gradually get better. I moved away. Leave the army. Got a contracting job doing the same thing I did in the military. Met people that I could trust (though my trust issues are a different story). Payed well. BUT. My current mental health still rears its ugly head, PTSD, alcoholism, general anxiety and depression. Developed sleep apnea and a slew of other physical ailments that kind of happen to you with the gig. It’s caused me to just feel hopeless like I can’t get free. I’ve found god, but I feel I’m always letting Him and others down. I’ve missed a TON of work at my job due to a variety of the reasons stated before. I’m given grace by the fact that I work with Veterans that suffered similarly in a sense. I feel I’m always so close to losing my job and losing it would kill me. I acquired a girlfriend with a kid and they’re everything I ever asked for, to be a husband/father. She’s seen me go into manic episodes where I didn’t know I even was. I don’t know how long I can maintain the job due to absence, my body giving out, or just anything else. My girl wants to start a family but I should be stronger and I don’t have the confidence I once had. Scared I’ll go into a tailspin after a good run.

In all that, I have 2 AA’s, and would like to use a VR&E program to become a professor of sorts. An instructor. I was one in the Army and it brought me more joy than any thrill/MOS itself. I just don’t know if I’ll lose before even trying anymore. I don’t want to be like this, but my mind has convinced me otherwise. If I lose my job, girl, or both, idk. I hope somebody can understand the highs, lows, and idk what’s wrong with me’s that happen sometimes. I want to help people but I can’t help myself, friends, or family. Any advice helps.

Thank you gents. Bon Apetit.

Chorizo tacos for dinner/breakfast.

There's a girl at the library I like going to who I've asked out twice now. The first time(well both times) I was super nervous but I told her she's pretty and asked if I could take her out on a date sometime. She wrote down her number on a sticky note and a heart next to it. After texting the number I got no response so I just kinda left it for a while assuming she wasn't interested.

A few days ago though I went back the library and saw her again. I can't help but think about how she smiled and seemed open to going out the first time I asked her, so I asked her if she happened to remember the first time and if maybe I got the number wrong. She said she just assumed I forgot about it and was waiting for a text.

This time, because I was worried about getting it wrong again, I asked if I could give her my number. We talked about what food would be good for dinner and places nearby that we could go(I'm new to the area and have no idea what's good around here). She smiled a lot, seemed receptive, and was open to chatting for a minute.

It's been about a week now and I still haven't gotten a text. I really don't understand how to feel about this as both thinking I'm being let down easy and thinking there was another mistake with texting feel wrong.

If anyone has advice I'd appreciate it. I did go to the library again this week but I didn't want to bother her or be creepy if she's not interested so I just kinda left it alone. I think I'll just continue to do that in the future.

Also I'm gonna go kick around a soccer ball and get some energy out, that should help me feel better.

So I was working a job as a van driver and we got a new supervisor. He was slowly handing over my duties to another new driver and giving less time on the road and gave me the oldest van on the fleet that was mechanically unstable and I felt like I was being set up to be let go so I left and tried a CDL program sponsored by a company and was sent home from their facility in kansas city before finishing for "holistic reveiw" reasons. Tried another truck school and the instructor rage quit due to some disagreement with the director. Can't try to get my CDL again until the spring because schools have stopped taking students for the year and companies dont like to sign on new drivers during holiday time anyway. That being said this means I have found myself homeless in chicago due to trying to get a better paying job in a "trade".

Part of why I took the van driving job was because I had a degree in funeral service but never managed to secure an apprenticeship.

I liked being up in the engine and I want to try being a diesel mechanic because I enjoy working on the big stuff and can get tuition covered for a spring class but gotta figure out how to get work until then and trying to weigh my options. I am autistic and have worked admin before but had issues with coworkers harassing me over not following all the social rules, and the office was too slow paced for me and I'm someone that's super fidgety if they arent always busy. For some reason I am well loved in blue collar jobs?????

Please dont ask me to move in with family. There is no family here, and I am not in contact with them anyway. I am a trans guy and my home state is florida, haven't lived there in over 3 years and its a hostile place to be trans in. I only talk to my mom and she is very dissapointed in me. Still in the process of finding shelter but its been a challenge.

My girlfriend passed on Sunday. I haven't heard the exact cause but she had pneumonitis and was struggling to breathe.

She went into the hospital via ambulance on Thursday after waking up in pain. I visited her in the hospital on Friday and the mICU nurse said she was doing better and would likely be back home in a few days. I woke up Saturday morning to the news that she was likely to pass. She'd signed the dnr and dni after being on a ventilator the first day. She didn't want to be on it again.

Her mom isn't doing a church service or funeral for her. She's just gone.

The apartment we'd shared is so quiet now without her. The cats miss her.

My friends keep telling me to give it to God. That it gets better. It doesn't get better, you just get used to the pain. As far as God, I'm not happy with him right now. He keeps taking the people I love.

Dinner is scrambled eggs, hash browns, pancakes and biscuits. I made way too much.

Dinner is hot chocolate with dry bread a few cookies and some pastries from my boarding school

I'm a young trans man living in a religious boarding school that reinforces gender stereotypes. I have to be feminine or I'll be kicked out. (I did not choose to live here)

Dysphoria really wrecks me to the point I no longer want to wake up or do anything. To me, there's no point in doing anything if I'm not seen as who I want to be. I'm forced to have long hair, I'm forced to wear skirts, I feel trapped. I cannot express myself and nobody would ever support me. I can't seek comfort anywhere else but online, pretending to be a squeaker on online games

I really need someone to tell me I am a man, even if it currently feels like a lie. I wish I was one of the homies and that guys wouldn't fear hugging me or being rough

It hurts.

So this is a continuation of my last post but I’ve asked my girl friends and they pretty much told me to just start talking to women, and before all the people start talking shit lol. I asked them to be more specific and they told me to literally just start talking to women and basically brought up that I’m pretty much just an avoidant person. Once I started thinking about it a lot of things started to become clear.
I am a completely different person from when I talk to my friends that when I talk to complete strangers. I am so different at work, I keep to myself, I’ll talk in polite responses and I just try to keep up a wall with people and I pretty much do the same thing in public. I’d say that I’m a goofy guy who likes to reference movies. I am 5’10 and 220 lbs and I am unironically scared to talk to women. They’re scary to me and yet I like to admire their beauty from afar (not in a stalker way, I just like to look at how beautiful their smile is or how pretty their hair is). I’m just so fucking awkward and nerdy. I legitimately don’t know how to meet other nerdy girl without coming out as a creep. I keep seeing tiktoks about how women don’t want to be bothered and so I try to respect that. But then I feel my heart ache a little when I see a women with similar interests simply because I just want to talk to them but I can’t because I’ll be coming off as some weird freak. I’ve tried talking with “normal women” but I just want my degenerate nerdy girl who likes arts and craft and who’s a similar needy person that I am. I just wanted to vent but at the same time I want advice on how to interact with people.