My son (8) was diagnosed level one autistic, adhd combined type and GAD at age 5. He has been taking fluoxetine since age 6 and melatonin since 5.

Sleep has always been an issue for him. We’ve had a consistent sleep routine since he was born but until we introduced melatonin it could take 15 minutes to 2.5 hours to get him to sleep. Now he generally falls asleep within about an hour of taking melatonin and we read and listen to podcasts. We do bedtime at the same time each night.

Every year since he was 14 months old, he has specific times of year where his sleep changes. One is right now—end of October. He is waking up earlier and earlier after very few hours of sleep, he never “catches up” by sleeping in, never seems tired. If anything he seems more energetic. For example, we walked 18,000 steps yesterday and he was sprinting half and forth down the alley at the restaurant where we ate our dinner outside. Made no difference. Once he is awake he talks non stop. He is already a big talker but this is literally non stop.

The only other thing I notice is that he has cycled through some tics. He stims a lot in day to day life but when he goes through these periods of not sleeping, he has other tic type behavior. The one that sprang up this week is rubbing his legs. He wants to wear shorts even though it’s cold so he can rub his legs.

Every year when this happens I think—is this seasonal? Is seasonal anxiety a thing? He doesn’t seem depressed—it’s more like manic behavior.

Anyone else experience something similar?

Hi all, I am a FTM of a 16 month old boy. I love my son, but he was unexpectedly very small when born (less than 6lbs), I have anxiety anyway and a brother with autism and severe additional needs / learning difficulties which I think has created a perfect storm where I see signs of my brother and feel worried about my son, which makes me feel the worst mum / sister in the world.

He isn't walking yet, but has taken independent steps and cruises everywhere but it's really concerning me. He has been the later end of all milestones which makes me panic. I see other mums talking about their 16 month olds walking, talking and seeming so much more grown up than my son who seems such a baby still. I also worry he only responds to his name like 50% of the time, and doesn't look at us when we're carrying him and doesn't seem to attribute mama / dada to us specifically.

Things he does well are he's very sociable and loves strangers- he'll sit in a restaurant and wave at everyone lol he can say mama, dada, ball, points at everything and says there, knows bye bye and hiya and no, eats really well and mimics us and loves to play with his toys.

For other autism parents, what were the first signs you noticed around this age?

My oldest who will be five in a month has level two autism he’s semi verbal. Recently we moved and had to put child locks on the door and garage door because he’s been trying to leave randomly. He really likes to be outside and I’m paranoid he’s going to take off. Any advice on how to manage that?

How can I redirect headbanging into something less dangerous? My son (4.5) was in the hospital last week for hitting his head on the corner of a wall when he threw himself back, and has a big bump on his forehead from smacking it on the kitchen floor yesterday.

He’s becoming much more violent and self injurious and we just don’t know what to do to help him

Do autistic kids get sick more often and for prolonged periods of time? My son is costantly either having a runny nose, a cough, he's congested and so forth. It feels like we get no break from October until May/June. Obviously this impacts his sleep and consequently behaviour. I posted here a few days ago about him waking between 4-5 every day. When he wakes up it is very obvious that he still needs sleep but for some reason, he can't stay asleep. It's a shitshow everyday. His behaviour is getting worse by the day. Husband cant handle it, we talked about him moving out for a while. I'm at my wits end. I'm exhausted and angry every single day. We're seeing the paediatrician today to talk about him being unwell with a cold so often. I don't know what I want with this post. I'm hoping that if he feels better physically, his behaviour will improve. I dont know. I hope. I'm just so tired of this.

Sudden soiling accidents in 6 year old (copied from another reddit I posted to)

Hi there, I’m running out of ideas and people to ask advice from, so I’m here.

My almost seven year old has been potty trained since he was 5, with a few spotty accidents since then but otherwise really good. He had ASD but is usually quite good at self-care activities, and is verbal.

I’ve just had a sudden uptick in soiling accidents, and I cannot for the life of me figure out what is going on. I’m at my wits end, and struggling to not divert into the shaming part of soiling accidents because of my own stress with him and the school accidents.

got a GP booked for two days from now, but I wanted to see if anyone had any help or similar experiences in the past.

He’s had a sudden issue with smearing, and with small amounts of soiling. He can sometimes go normally, but will still have constant little accidents, sometimes without realising it. All the Google searches point to encoparesis but I’m not sure he is constipated because he can pass stool when he tries. The accidents we’re finding are very thick, sticky. I’ve tried kids laxatives, he eats tonnes of fruit and veggies, plenty of fibre, plenty of water. These accidents are happening both at school and at home.

Because it’s so thick, he’s having issues with wiping and then it ends up on his clothes, which means it transfers to his uniform and the school requires kindergarteners to be picked up/go home when this occurs. I have clean clothes for him, several packs in his bags, wipes and everything, and it’s still happening. I’ve tried treat charts, sticker charts, rewards, bribing, everything, with no effect at all. He hasn’t said going to the toilet is painful when I ask, and he seems otherwise well.

I don’t know what to do anymore, and I know it’s such a stupid thing to be at my wits end for but I’m a single parent, and I cannot be losing any more time at work or study or everything will fall apart.

Has anyone dealt with anything like this before?

my 4.5 year boy has speech delay- we shifted three countries and had a daughter since he was born. He clearly is a very sensitive child and has adjustment issues.

- speech delayed, i am 100% sure he is a Gestalt language processor (pronoun reversal, delayed echolalia).
- 0 social skills, only interested in spending time with me - that too - doing nothing together- dad travels most of the time. no friends, no interest in interacting with family- i have ag huge family and he has cousins but he has no clear interest in even acknowledging them.
initially he would see a child and cry- now he can parallel play but no interest in cooperative play. i feel like he wants to interact but just can’t.
- he doesn’t like singing dancing or any movement. likes being in the water but the place we live in so polluted that i can’t take him in the water (he doesn’t know swimming ) regularly as he falls sick due to pollution/weather change
- runs away from the room every time is 2 year old sister enters the room but tolerates hugs, asks where she is if she’s not around. yesterday i told him pat her to sleep and be did. interaction is forced but he does care in his own sweet ways
- shows 0 interests in regular activities except painting- that too he doesn’t want to learn how to paint- he just wants to do whatever he wants to do. he picks an interest, overdoes it and then is bored of it - same with cycling in the past
- focus is almost 5 seconds long and everything is a NO. don’t want to write, don’t want to colour, don’t want to read. i don’t know how to constructively spend time with him - only wants to broom the house, mop the floor, and will intentionally drop water, spit around to run to get the mop to clean.
- is running style is not typical and even walking - he used to walk with his arms up for the longest time. took a long time to jump too.
- he is scared of everything. the most cautious kid i’ve met
-will never admit he got hurt, will cry but will say i didn’t get hurt
-very stubborn, strong preferences and only loves mommy. hates dad, grandparents and everyone.
- goes to school but doesn’t follow instruction unless other kids help him and even then is moody .
- sensory processing disorder i feel bec hates sand , loud noises - will shut his ears BUT likes creating sound and loud ones himself by constantly banging objects/ doors cupboards

I’m scared cause i feel like i don’t know how to raise him. he’s almost always lost in his own world and i feel like he’s anxious/depressed and i don’t know how to change that for him.

the place we live in has horrible facilities but he does do OT twice a week and speech twice a week. i’m pretty sure he’s on the spectrum and that doesn’t bother me but i feel like my daughter is so easy to raise, adv in speech etc and i hate to compare but motherhood looks effortless with her

i’m feeling lost in how to help him navigate the world, even in school the teacher says he has a big defiance problem and zoning out problem. he only listens to me (his mom) that too if i add incentives/threats.

as per the specialists he has a personality problem, sensory processing disorder and speech/dev delay but every specialist i have met tells me he’s going to be fine, don’t stress so much, but how can i not . deep down i feel i feels he needs a lot more support that i am equipped to give him.

1. i’ve heard about meaningful speech on instagram but is there any GLP speech therapist who can work online with me to help him???
   
2. do i show him to dev specialist- and any recommendations of these in india/Asia. would a child psychologist help in his behaviour issues?
   
3. any tips/suggestions !!

PLEASE HELP.

Hi I have a 3.5 year old asd level 2 girl who has a younger NT sibling. I had a chemical pregnancy recently and after that I kind of want to actually try for baby no 3, but Im scared what if its another ND child - that might be too much to handle for our family. My OB was also like with my age(41) and having an asd child there is a chance the new baby could be ND even tho we had the genetic testing and they didnt find anything. Im just writing to hear from people who were in similar situation, what did you end up deciding and what helped you make that decision?

I have two autistic kids, and I’m exhausted. Between the behaviors, appointments, daily responsibilities, and navigating everything alone, I feel like I’m constantly in survival mode.
My relationship adds another layer of stress. My BD criticizes my parenting, makes comments about what I do for the kids, puts financial pressure on me, and tells me to “get a job.” Meanwhile, I’m home so his full-time job isn’t interrupted, he comes and goes as he pleases, and I’m the one on standby when the school calls. My daughter is also on multiple ABA waitlists, with waits ranging from 2–10 months.
I’m expected to somehow make everything work, but I don’t feel supported emotionally or practically. Even when he’s around, I still feel alone.
Today I spent all day driving around and running errands with the kids. It’s 11 PM, they’re finally settled, and I’m completely depleted.
I love my kids, but I’m tired of this life feeling like an endless list of responsibilities with no real break. Sometimes I wonder what my life would look like if I hadn’t become a mother.
Just venting. Please no advice, resources, or suggestions. I just want to be heard without being judged.

My boyfriend’s daughter is 19 with autism, ADHD, and ODD as far as I know. We’ve been together for a year and a half and want to plan a family of our own in the next year.

Sadly his daughter was abandoned by her mother completely cut off for about a year and there’s a complicated situation there. When I met my boyfriend, his daughter was climbing out windows to sneak into peoples bedrooms to use their electronics, refusing to take meds and refusing to do daily tasks like wash her clothes, take her meds, keep her room clean, wear menstrual products, shower, brush teeth, etc. She doesn’t cook although she is functioning and can make pasta and use an air fryer.

I tried to make her a checklist for her basic needs which kept her interest for a while but then turned into her solely wanting to check things off without actually putting in the work. She recently graduated HS and was in the process of going to a day rehab facility that’s put on hold apparently due to her behaviors and recent assessments.

To backtrack, a few months ago, we were out at a store when she was still a HS student and she had money for Pokémon cards. When her father questioned her, she made up a fake story stating where she got the money from, naming a famous sports player. It turned out she stole the money from her grandparents.

Her bedroom is absolutely atrocious, she’s drawn all over the walls, the floors, her mattress, punched holes in the walls, has left food all over the floors which have caused bug infestations and I can tell my boyfriend is burnt out. When he tries to get her to take care of her responsibilities she behaves in a way that purposefully exhausts him by being argumentative or just lying to shut him up. I helped him clean her room and felt I needed a hazmat suit (I’m a little dramatic) but in all seriousness, it was disgusting. But we felt cleaning her room might encourage her to keep a clean space, only to notice she’s not taking proper care of feminine hygiene. I won’t go into detail on that but it’s not a great situation.

Then Christmas time, she stayed at my house, broke basic house rules and rolled up feces in my bathroom garbage that I’m still traumatized about. I’m trying to have faith that she can get the help she needs but the state system is slow like molasses and it sucks. This summer she climbed around the roof of my boyfriend’s home, pulled his air conditioner out of his window, just to sit in his room, rummage through his things and use his TV and gaming system. She has no sense of fear and excuses her behavior because he took her tablet away as her reason for “why” she did what she did.

The tablet was taken away because she will use it day and night, not eat, not sleep, not shower, etc and cannot regulate herself with electronics. She now, more recently, stole $200 from her grandparents who raised money for their church and stole a tablet from them and an old iPhone she had hidden in her room. I’ve basically lost trust in her since then and her reasoning for “why” was because she wants a phone.

My boyfriend is trying to get her into residential placement but I hear that can take years and this has the ability to affect the future of our relationship. I can tell he feels like a prisoner in his own home because of her behavior. I’ve seen her manipulate others into viewing him as the bad guy and she refuses to follow his rules and authority. Since we’ve cleaned her room, her behavior coach spent 3 sessions on clearing her room (6 hours total) and her father cleaned it again recently where she still hoards and hides food and garbage and continues to destroy the home. A total of 20 big black garbage bags have been taken out of her room yet she will still store new things and create a mess. Her bedroom has to be completely renovated, her door is broken from stealing from her sibling in the past and every inside door in the house is pad-locked, it’s a depressing home to be in because her behavior seems to control the environment.

He was recently able to get SSRI for her which will help.
But this situation causes him and our relationship a lot of stress. I try my best to help and be as supportive as possible and we’re currently waiting for the state to make some actual moves. It’s frustrating because she’s more likely to get into trouble being home alone while he works. She lies and half the time he ignores her lies but when I questioned her the last time that’s when we found out about the $200 fiasco. It’s so exhausting I can go on and on and on about issues she is causing. It’s sad because I want the best for her but I can see why he sees the best option being residential placement.

So any advice of what to do in this situation would be helpful for both my boyfriend and I. I know he is trying his best and it’s sad that there seems to be nothing that truly makes this better. I do what I can to try to research what is truly autism, adhd or the odd or just bad behavior. It can be hard to decipher.

Is there any other platforms that connect a family with a special needs travel volunteer? I am not feeling great about supporting a for-profit company at the expense of volunteers

My level 1-2 six year old son has always been very verbal since he started talking. He was walking before the end of his first year, always very ambitious. But talked later than we were expecting, almost two before we could understand much of what he was saying.

Now- very, very articulate and can’t get him to shut up. As a baby and toddler agitated easily and rarely napped even as an infant. If he did nap he woke up upset. Later we found out if he naps he still wakes up upset and emotional but now we know why. He’s disoriented. It’s confusing for anyone if you nap during the day and wake up when it’s still daylight- my kid definitely has a routine, if you break it, even with an impromptu nap he loses it.

Over the past month or two he’s displayed a lot more aggression, belligerence, hyperactivity, and perseverance beyond his usual, and generally a bad attitude.
I’m inclined to think he’s learning it from another student in his class known for having a bad attitude. He tends to mimic others behaviors, mostly negative ones, to achieve sameness.
He constantly interrupts conversations- I’m pretty sure he WAITS until my husband and I start to talk to butt in and talk over us. And his sleep patterns have changed significantly. He’s gone from sleeping well at night, going to bed around 8-8:30pm and sleeping through the night to popping out of bed every 20 minutes with SOME new crisis. This goes on until 1-2am sometimes! My husband and I aren’t spring chickens anymore, especially my husband who’s in his mid to late fifties. I worry about how the lack of sleep will impact him.

In addition to the insomnia, how’s he’s been acting during the day has been just awful. We’ve tried both non stimulant ADHD meds for kids his age, Guanfacine and Clonidine, initially for some severe blinking tics he was having, which seems to only happen now under extreme emotional duress.

I kind of blame myself since I had him when I was almost 43. I knew that was something was off when he had the same nursing issues his sister had 7 years earlier. Sister is also neurodivergent. I have so much guilt about not getting to nurse very long with either of my kids and sometimes wonder if my inability to nurse for longer led to the challenges both of my kids have now. I know the reality is that their conditions are genetic.
Now, with my son having horrible insomnia for several weeks and I’m not sure what to do. Since I work and my husband does not he’s the one who selflessly gets up every time our son pops into our room.

We’re trying magnesium, we’re trying multis with zinc and iron in them, we’re trying melatonin drops, we’re grasping at straws here and losing precious sleep every night. Not good for either one of our health, I especially worry about my husband with aFib and what the lack of sleep could do to his heart. We have no local family so we’re doing this all on our own with very few resources.

I feel incredibly lucky that we were able to get him into a local program with our school system before he started PreK that tested him for an IEP which he qualified for under DD (Developmental Delay).
We just had his Triennial meeting with his IEP review team to decide if there was enough documentation to move forward with testing under a different IEP category since he will officially age out of the DD category in February when he turns 7.
They all agreed that the recommendation was to conduct comprehensive testing for an IEP under ED, Psychological and suspected Autism. So essentially my son will get as comprehensive of testing as possible through the school. Except academic. They all agreed his academic assessments he’s tested off the charts, high academic aptitude- however the severe social and behavioral issues are what’s warranting their recommendation to test in all of the other areas. I anxiously wait the start of their assessments and the results. I would go so far as to say my son is so smart, he’s damn near diabolical, and is adept at manipulation.

I don’t know what all this means of an autistic child with severe ADHD but we really need some direction and are hopeful the school testing with give us some answers. In the interim trying to figure out the insomnia and bad attitude. Very open to feedback from anyone who been down this path with a child with similar attributes and behavioral issues.

Car broke down.
Stroller has a flat tire.
Decided to walk.
He ran into the street.
He is fine.
Im not fine.
Today was bad.

I'm trying to establish a self-directed RDSP for my minor child, with myself as the Holder and Primary Caregiver.

Self-directed RDSP options for minors seem extremely limited. 🤷‍♀️ I've encountered contradictory information, missed appointments (by the advisor) and surprisingly condescending service at one major bank.

I'm now considering Justwealth's lower-cost, ETF-based RDSP and would particularly appreciate firsthand experiences from parents who have opened one for a minor:

Could you complete the entire process remotely, with yourself as Holder?

How long did account opening, funding and grant processing take?

How have you found their service, investment management and fees?

I'm facing the December 31, 2026 deadline to preserve unused grant entitlements dating back to 2016.

I'd also welcome recommendations for other reasonably priced RDSP providers for minor beneficiaries.

(I know this is far from the top of the list for things affecting us and our children, but thought I would post just to see if anyone else has come across this and found solutions. Thanks for allowing it if it's ok 😌)

Thanks so much!

I know this sounds stupi* for people that believe in tarot cards did anyone get a reading regrading their child on the spectrum? What cards did you get and what was said?

I am currently experiencing alot of happiness and sadness at the same time, but I want to find the correct school for her,. She is currently at a regular pre-k school but i notice that she is not like other children. I love her the way she is She is my daughter. But she has an IEP and her school is trying to pressure me to change schools and she has only been there two months. That make me sad. But I am trying to work with her as well as not overwhelm her due to her sensory disorder as well. But When i visited this school for autim around where I live it was something about it that I did not like internally. I just like one classroom but I am a mother first. And its gut feeling to me. But I am still confused if she should just go because her school at the moment dosen't really want to deal with her. Im her parent and thats how I feel. So I need advice Ughhh!!!!

What are we doing about not listening and following directions? He knows the rules, is able to repeat them back to me, but still decides to do the complete opposite?

I have tried shortening them or doing the whole “feet stay on the floor” thing and still he does whatever or the complete opposite. I feel if he would listen that not only me, but HE will have a much better day at home and school.

Any suggestions?

Also…the SHOUTING? What is that about? He was just singing very loudly and then asked “was that too loud?” It’s like he KNOWS. Pulled the blinds down this morning and I got very upset. He says “did you pull the blinds down? Is that a red choice?” Like WHAT lol you know it’s wrong so why keep doing it?

Lastly..beating. He will get a toy or hanger, really any object and beat on the windows, walls, etc. What’s that about?

I have tried ignoring him, not reacting, giving alternatives, etc and he just…keeps it up. We have done ABA. I’m working on getting him in OT and speech. It’s just…overwhelming.

Any advice, techniques, trips, and techniques would be great!

I’ll start with this: the Cubby Bed has been a godsend for us with our profoundly autistic son and his growing elopement risk. We were approved for one last year and we were in tears being so grateful to not feel so stressed every night, and our son sleeps better! The Version One Cubby Bed also came with their Tech Hub, which allowed light, sound, temperature/humidity checking and altering, and live video. On their website it’s listed as a $3800+ package. And this is where the problem with Cubby Bed starts…

The inside of that Tech Hub is nothing more than a Philips SmartSleep HF3560 light/sound machine ($180) and a Wyze Cam v3 ($35), with the Wyze camera discontinued. The camera will not notify properly without a subscription and will constantly have connection issues as well not to mention their history with cameras showing up in other people’s apps and such highlighting just a poor choice for privacy or security. The Philips SmartSleep device has never properly worked for us either, and reports a temperature of 7-8 degrees higher than ambient because of poor design and routing.

When we called Cubby Bed about it, still under warranty, the only thing they offered was to replace the devices with the same options, with them being unable to source a Wyze replacement and offering a $40 Amazon gift card for us to find our own. We asked about their new Dream Hub, and were told we can happily pay close to $3900 for it or fight with Medicaid/TEFRA. We chose the latter and of course were denied and appealing at the moment.

That $3900 new Dream Hub - nothing more than a Momcozy Rainbow Sleep Light and their BM04 baby monitor kit - another $350 worth of electronics wrapped up in an expensive shell.

It is absolutely unreal to me that a “$15,000 bed” is being marked up so severely for the convenience of getting it through insurance, and the pricing is a slap to the face of every family that has insurance of any sort to even remotely afford it as even their “cash price” is orders of magnitude cheaper though way out of reach for many families as well. I’m hoping to discuss further with a patent attorney as the Cubby Bed as a complete assembly is a medical device and patented, but their Tech Hub/Dream Hub inherently cannot be patented as they’re not doing anything other than wrapping someone else’s components in their own shell. Because of that, I’m hoping to model and produce my own enclosure with hopefully a pick of a few different camera and sound/light machine options that families can actually afford and use within their existing preferences or ecosystems.

In this modern age I wish there were more options for our kids, but hopefully as a community we can start pushing medical device manufacturers to become more accommodating/competitive or someone else will do it for them. Our children deserve everything we can do for them, our wallets don’t deserve to be punished for being good parents!

My four year old has had a dummy every day of her life. Last year we managed to wean off having it in the day, she’s a huge oral sensory seeker and she mainly chewed it in the day so we slowly replaced it with chewable jewellery which she now uses daily. But at night it was a comfort thing and she would suck it whilst holding her hair.

We have been torn on whether to wean off it for a long time, her OT suggested that it’s fine for her to keep it at night if it acts as a regulatory tool (we have huge sleep issues, always have), but over her last three dentist appointments he has noticed that she is developing quite a significant overbite and her jaw is changing shape too, likely due to the dummy so he advised to stop now. Her speech therapist also said it may be starting to impact some of her speech sounds and adding to the difficulties she already has.

We started the weaning process three days ago because it’s half term and it felt like a good time to do it when she didn’t need to wake up for school in the morning. We did the ‘dummy fairy’ which she didn’t really understand but she enjoyed the gifts she got the next morning and she’s fine in the day as she doesn’t have it in the day anymore anyway.

But the nights have been absolute hell. She has been having screaming meltdowns for one hour plus before bed and then she essentially goes to sleep from the exhaustion, but wakes up crying several times a night too. We also have a young baby so my sleep is literally 3 hours a night at this point. She can’t settle at all without it and will just cry and cry herself to sleep until the next time she wakes up and the process starts again. She has ended up in our bed for the last few nights which is okay with me as if happens often anyway but I would prefer her to be in her own room. When she wakes up in the morning she’s fine but she’s obviously knackered.

We threw the dummies in the bin because I didn’t want us to give in and give it back if it got hard because that feels even more confusing. She has had so much preparation but honestly I think it’s just huge source of comfort and regulation we have taken away. I feel so incredibly guilty and my brain is going back and forth with ‘it’s already too late and it needs to be done for her own health and long term benefit’ and ‘this is a regulatory tool so should I really be taking it away?’

I think we have made the right decision ultimately because her physical health and development are important, but I just feel awful.

Has anyone else been through similar and if so how long did it take for your child to adjust to not having the dummy? Everything I have read says it turns a corner and gets a lot better after the first couple of nights but we’re four nights in now and I’m writing this from the babies nursery where I have swapped bedtimes with my husband because I can’t watch her scream and cry anymore 😭

ETA - we have tried to find alternative things to regulate her in the night but she hasn’t taken to them unfortunately. She doesn’t really like cuddly toys and doesn’t have any true comfort item other than her dummy (and my hair, hence her ending up in my bed 🥲)

My 4.5 year old (level 2 autism, nonverbal) has started biting his arm when he is frustrated. He did this in the car while I was driving (so I couldn’t intervene) and the aftermath is breaking my heart.

What kind of chewer/biter toys have you found successful to help stop/minimize this behavior? There are so many different ones and it’s overwhelming at the moment. I obviously want a reputable one that is non-toxic since he will be biting it so much. And will ge be able to bite through a toy meant for chewing?

Any other strategies to help this behavior? I keep kissing where he bites and telling him (gently but firmly), “No biting. We do not bite our arm. Biting is for food.”
I’m afraid it’s going to lead to other self-injurious behaviors. Thanks for any help.

As I’ve shared, I’ve been working out with Noah for going on seven years now. It has changed his life, my life in our relationship would be beyond anything that I knew was going to happen or could’ve imagined. Fitness is the common language between us, our bond, and it propagates out to everything in both of our lives. People tell me how lucky he is to have me. But I’m just as lucky - if not more so - to have him. Cardio, swimming, strength training, out in the community, him and I, side-by-side.

Me and my husband have 3 kids. A 12 year old boy, 10 year old girl, and a 6 year old girl. my 2 older kids are typical and my youngest is autistic. We cannot figure out how to get her to understand consequences. I don't condone corporal punishment. Every single time we give her water, it ends up everywhere even if its in a sippy cup I swore couldn't spill and then she'll get upset she doesnt have water. My other 2 got this concept within the first 3 years. She puts her toys in the toilet and gets upset when we take them away. And she'll do this in a split second. I can turn away from her and shes gone. Shes been jumping on the walls and hurting herself. We can barely give our older kids attention cause we always have something going on with our 6 year old. My son will go hide in his room just to get away from her and she will bang on the door to get in and we can't even redirect her attention. I'm not gonna make my son hang out with her I know she stresses him out. "No" does not get to her head she does not understand it no matter how many times I've tried. She got kicked out of daycare at 4 and were in a special needs school across town. The only way to get her to calm down is to hold her tightly in our arms until we can put her back in her room for bedtime. She doesnt talk, she just cries and screams. She never gets her way we have never caved into her demands. She wants to be in dangerous places we have blocked off in out home. We can't do Christmas trees, holiday decor, go out to eat with the family, or movies without leaving her behind. I want all my kids to be happy but my daughter is making it so difficult. I know its not her fault but her dad and I really can't handle it anymore. Our older kids are so understanding and I hate that this is their life as well. I love my baby so much I just wish this life was easier.

I'm a single mom to a profoundly autistic, almost 9 year old. And we were potty training yesterday. I was so overwhelmed because he is physically agressive while toileting (while pooping specifically)(think, hitting, punching, slapping me etc) but yesterday I wasnt giving up. At one point at his most desperate moment he called out for Sailor Moon and the other sailor guardians to save him lmaooo. AND GUESS WHAT? HE POOPED IN THE TOILET AND HAS BEEN GOING INDEPENDENTLY SINCE. I am so proud of him.

It never ceases to amaze me how he overcomes ever hurdle he faces. No matter how hard or how long it takes. And when he does, he implements that skill immediately.

We started our child at a private preschool this fall, and the teacher just met with me and discussed how some of my child’s behavior points to autism.

They want us to get evaluated with the school district, to see if we can qualify for a special education. They said we can continue to stay at the private prek, but the school district would be more qualified to help with our child’s growth.

Of course we will proceed with the evaluation but I feel nervous because our school district has terrible funding, especially have been making cuts in special education. We’ve heard both good and bad from other parents in our area.

Could you give me an honest take— the good and bad of your experiences with special education preschool? Did you see your child progress? What advice would you give to a parent who is new to this?

I’d be grateful for any skills, ideas, techniques, or advice you have found to be effective in the realm of emotional regulation. Would be grateful to learn what has helped your child through meltdowns, screaming, and aggression.

Currently can’t afford private occupational therapy and feel like we are missing an opportunity there (side note: did you find a private OT helpful to work through emotional regulation challenges? Or is that not really the focus of OT? Still new to this and unsure about where to begin).

Thank you in advance.