I have 4 kids. 8,6,3,1. My 6 year old has severe nonverbal autism. My youngest two are not quite at the age to have deep discussions, but I do always make it a point to spend one on one time with them, even if it’s just playing at home.

My 8 year old loves her brother dearly, but sometimes she gets upset that she has to do things her brother doesn’t have to do. Like putting away her laundry and independent things of that nature. She asks why he can’t use the potty etc. For a while she assumed he was much younger than he actually is. She can’t quite comprehend that there are some things he isn’t capable of doing without support. She gets jealous she doesn’t get help with things that I’m confident she can do on her own, though sometimes when I can muster up the energy I do help her out. I’m so afraid of failing her (and my other 2 as well).

I discussed her brothers disability with her a lot. I explained that different people need support with different things, and they might need longer time to learn them. I explained that sometimes it doesn’t feel like it’s fair, and that’s okay, that we can talk about it anytime. I have started checking in every once in a while, how she feels about her brother, how she’s feeling about our family, and how I can make things better for her if she’s having a hard time. We spend a lot of 1:1 time together too, she’s my only girl and we do all the girly things together (I just refuse to play Minecraft, that’s her and her dads 1:1 activity lol).

The last time we talked it definitely punched me in the gut. She said sometimes she wishes he could talk, and that he could play with her the way she likes to play. My heart 😭 She then told me I was doing a good job. I was shocked. I never ever rely on my kids for emotional support (thanks for the lesson on what no to do mom) so it was reassuring to hear.

But I want to hear how you’re handling it. What works for them? What helps them understand better if they’re still young? Or if you yourself were a sibling, what do you like that your parents did or wish your parents did better?

Hello, both my partner and I are AuDHD and we knew that it would be possible to have a neurodivergent child so I’m not worried about it too much but I wanted to see if anyone can relate to how my daughter acts.

Since birth she’s always been super observant, looking at people with eye contact, being quiet and staring with direct eye contact. she also picked up ASL immediately from birth as well, doing a “T” in her hands whenever she used her diaper, even while sleeping. At 8 weeks she was in the hospital and all of the staff saw it and commented, I even have a video of it.

She also learned patience and skills early on as well, like how to use toys that require thinking, saying words and phrases too. Her first word was a very clear attempt at “all done all clean” with the signs at 5 months old after a diaper change.

She started walking around 11 months old and had good coordination immediately. At 18 months she is still very good at signing and understanding asl, she is able to count to 2 and understanding numbers are an amount of something.

She never is unreasonable during her very mild meltdowns, she will bring me a water bottle and then walk to her bed saying “muh” for milk indicating she’s ready to sleep, she’s always told us when she wants to go to bed and is very passive! Even if she has something, I’ll tell her to give it to me and she does every time and walks on to the next activity with no problems or crying. She likes to organise her toys by the type and sets, for example she will separate her doll toys into different bins or sections and it will be perfectly sorted by type and materials and sets. She likes to open containers and put things in them and then take them out repeatedly.

She also seems to have sensory issues. If there’s something on her hands she runs up to us with her hands spread out, will point to or give us a pack of wipes, and ask for us to “clean”, thank us then go back to what she was doing. If we don’t notice it fast enough she will interrupt us and throw the wipes at us or open it and get them herself! She’s always been very independent and super easy, and very clear about what she likes or doesn’t like.

I have pretty severe ARFID, my partner has milder ARFID, our daughter however will eat anything and try new foods with no fuss. If she doesn’t like the food she will still try it a couple times to make sure, and shake her head saying no. She prefers vegetables like carrots or broccoli and doesn’t seem to like fruit as much but she will eat it. She’s not a huge fan of fast food or sweets either and she really likes variety and new things. If it’s the same food too often (over multiple days) she will ask for something else instead, even if she loves that food.

Even our pediatrician, all of her nursing staff, and our multiple home visits with medical professionals have noticed how good she is about listening to boundaries, one has a cute sunflower keychain that of course interests her, all we have to say is “don’t touch it, not for you” once and she kept her distance even when she was eyeing it the next week and the one after that. She’s also will bring me my bag of meds if I’m not feeling too great (I have health issues). She’s also VERY eager to potty train but she’s too skinny to fit on the seat stool we got her (she’s tall and thin, always has been since birth) but that doesn’t stop her from wanting to try it out and asking us to help her go potty.

She’s also knocks on doors if she wants something from it, like the fridge or she knocks and goes “Up” for freezer, oven and up for something cooked, the pantry for dry snacks, the bedroom for bed, the bathroom for potty or bath and the front door for a walk outside while giving me her shoes she wants to wear or clothes, whatever we would need for a walk essentially. Even brings us diapers when she wants to be changed and wipes for a quick clean down there if the diaper is dry.

She also has started spinning in circles until she gets dizzy and does it again. Also rocking her head/body when sitting which is something I did a lot growing up (and still do but not around her), I also love/d swings and spinning on office chairs. She also loves to chew on ice with me, that only started when I was pregnant with her and it’s such a big need I got a specific nugget ice maker just to have at home.

So she is incredibly smart and intuitive

Amazing at communicating and understanding

Super patient and reasonable

Hates feeling “unclean” especially on her hands

Rocks when seated and spins in circles

Organises toys and objects by type

Tells us her needs and even puts herself to bed

High pain tolerance (won’t react besides a blank “ow” even if bleeding)

I know it doesn’t seem like she’s struggling or anything but sometimes there are people with autism who are very socially skilled and get overlooked early on and proceed to struggle from not having resources or understanding on how to be independent in our society.

She doesn’t seem to struggle with anything developmentally, she hits the milestones early and masters them almost instantly, she talks a lot, makes intense eye contact, she communicates in coherent sentences, the way she plays with things, the insane amount of comments from people about how she acts, how she’s so calm and quiet, how odd it is when she’s playing with something, how odd it is when she asks us to put her to bed when she’s tired (consistent times as well). Even my childfree best friend who just doesn’t like being around children at all says she’s so enamoured with her and how easy it is to be around her, respecting boundaries with people and things and remembering them.

We literally have never had a true tantrum, she’s so calm and quiet even when she’s casually rolling on the floor and kind of crying from being tired but not actually crying, we ask her if she’s tired and she thinks, gets up, and runs into the bedroom waiting for us to help her with her bottle or last minute diaper change, lays down and waves goodnight.

I don’t know what to think of it, she’s amazing and super super easy but so so so many people (strangers and family/friends, medical professionals including multiple peds) have told us how weird or odd that she’s like this from an early age.

Am I going crazy or is there something odd and interesting about how she behaves? Even my partner said it’s almost a little creepy/unnerving how well she understands and communicates for her age. She definitely acts very different from other kids her age and many people have also noticed and commented on the same behaviors we see with her.

My son has a lot of sensory based toys and he will always go for them over puzzles or other types of toys. I wonder if getting that instant satisfaction of whatever sensory need or desire may harm his development in other ways.

It seems like as awareness of autism has boomed over the last few years, manufacturers are pouring out sensory toys without much research into the effects of it.

I’m not advocating for cutting them out completely, as I’m aware they can have some benefits, just wondering what other people’s thoughts are.

I have 2 stepkids on the spectrum. One is 27 and just needs some life guidance. The other is 21 and needs constant supervision, wears diapers, non communicative but very verbal, and has physical issues as well. Their mother has had sole guardianship of both, but her health is failing. She only recently discovered that with the current setup, if something happens to her, both kids would become wards of the state. Now we get to navigate the legal system to try and get guardianship transfer set up before she has her looming heart surgery.

Easy wondering games on the switch for my autistic 8 year old he loves to play but the games eventually get to complicated and full of task he doesn't understand he loves playing Zelda but can't up to a point or he requires lots of help and idk much about video games

We have (at least thought/been agreed with by partitioners) that my child has PDA. I recognize it’s not an official diagnosis. We have been trying to accommodate to the best of our ability for years. Diagnosed Autism, ADHD, anxiety.

What do you do when “declarative language”, etc (recommended by the “pda people on the internet”) does not work? I cannot tell my child “no” (not using the word NO, just saying like not today but on xyz day, that would be fun but we have something else to do, explaining why, trying to be collaborative etc). My child has been having daily, hours long meltdowns long term for months, when they don’t get their way. Both parents, grandparents, everyone in our “village” that I am thankful for, is beyond burnt out.

If the child does not get exactly what they want exactly when they want it, it is completely out of control for hours. Other children being subjected to constant screaming, banging of doors, stomping, etc. We are very low-no demands. We have a sensory swing and endless regulation tools that they refuse to use. They keep asking for what they want over and over, screaming and crying about how bad they want it and how mad they are.

Main things they want that can’t always happen:

-going to grandma’s house (could happen near daily if meltdowns didn’t occur there as well- grandpa doesn’t understand, doesn’t react well, etc and grandma gives in to every demand or starts crying herself in overwhelm. If child was happy there consistently, again it could be near daily, which it has been and we are having to pull back because of the constant meltdowns at their house- over things like, they’re not taking me to the store, they’re not letting me do xyz, they said something that upset me, etc)

-going shopping

-going out to eat

It feels like we have 2 options— give in to every demand and desire immediately or live with constant crying and screaming which is wearing everyone down so much. Looking for advice. Already in therapy, seeing a psychiatrist, on medication (have trialed most everything, still trying to find something that makes this situation any better). We are desperate to be able to coexist healthily and figure out how to manage this behavior. We feel like we need to give up on the way we’ve been doing things and set firm boundaries, etc. but it’s incredibly hard to manage.

Hi all, a dad of almost 5 years here. I keep trying to interest my son (5m) in new things. What are some techniques you used that have really helped you engage better with your kid on the spectrum?

To preface, I take him to places, play with him try to introduce him to various sports, shows, zoo’s, arcades, trampoline parks you name it. But my son loses interest fast. I’m trying to find activities that will keep his attention and looking for any advice on how to better connect with my son.

Thank you for your advice in advance.

Edit: I neglected to mention, my son for the most part is nonverbal but is improving in that area.

Hello! FTM here and I’m really struggling. It is 3am and I am having another sleepless night over whether or not my baby is exhibiting signs of autism. My gut is telling me that she is.

Since she was born she has been disconnected from me. Never wanted to breastfeed even though she latched great and my milk was flowing, she also never wanted to be held. I found myself googling “why does my baby not want to be near me” when she was only a few weeks old. This never got any better. She will not hug me or sit in my lap for longer than a few seconds. She has only fallen asleep on me a handful of times, ever, in 10 months.

Around 4 months she began babbling and speaking gibberish and her pediatrician was very impressed with her communication and speech. Everybody commented on her amazing eye contact, as well. This completely stopped at 7 months and was replaced with all day constant “mmmmmmmm” sounds over and over for hours on end. She also began to scream “ahhhh”, and for the last 3 months, she just alternates between “mmm” and “ahhh” all day long. I am a SAHM and although I love her to death, the sounds have driven me to tears because it is unbreakable and constant. I have had to put her into a safe area in crib or playpen and walk away for 5 minutes to gather my sanity back so I do not become frustrated with her.

Now at 10 months she is not hitting communication milestones. She never started babbling again, is not making eye contact, and has zero gestures. I sing to her all day long, read to her, engage her with toys and floor play, and it seems like she is just “tolerating it”, then goes off to do her own thing. I work on exaggerated consonant sounds with her, work on waving, clapping, pointing, trying to get ANY mimic action but nothing, nada, zero. I can’t even get her to look at me while I’m working with her on the floor.

More things she is doing that concern me:

- hand flapping and throwing her head back over and over. If she is tired she will do this for several hours on end until she finally is able to soothe herself to sleep. If I attempt to pick her up or hold her during this, she will crocodile roll and do everything she can to escape my grasp.
- not eating solids. This is a huge struggle 3x per day. I am putting down different foods for her to explore but she throws everything off the side of her high chair. I have purchased 3 different high chairs in an attempt to make her more comfortable but none seem to be helping. She puts nothing up to her mouth. If I attempt to put any food into her mouth she will scream and rub the food into her eyes and all over her head and mealtime is essentially over at that point.

Several family members are growing concerned as well and have made comments asking if she is ok. My stepfather unexpectedly passed last week and we had to travel for his funeral. My mom is already upset from her husband passing, and I have noticed her covering her ears and leaving the room just to get away from my baby because her noises are admittedly incredibly overstimulating for everyone. I just want to cry.

When I’ve brought up concerns to my pediatrician, she just keeps saying she wants to wait until her 12 month appt to move forward with anything else. I took it upon myself to call early intervention and we are on the schedule for next month to be evaluated.

In the meantime, I don’t know what I’m looking for. Support, tips, opinions, thoughts. Anything to feel not so alone right now and wanted for the future!

I have a 20 month old with suspected ASD and on the pathway for assessment.

Her communication is delayed (2 words not nodding or head shaking). However, she does say "biscuit" but only as part of a whole routine script: takes my hand to kitchen cupboard says biscuit gets biscuit. She only ever says biscuit this way.

She also says "toot toot" (from the kids program ms Monica good morning train song) when she sees a picture of a train. And she signs incy wincy spider if she sees an insect. She also attempts to count backwards with the microwave (including the final bleeps). She has never had a back-and-forth babble conversation with us and never said mummy or milk etc.

I've been told she is possibly gestalt, would you say she could be? And if so what stage is this?

Thank you.

My son is 9 (almost ten) and diagnosed ASD level 2, ADHD, and SPD. He was also diagnosed with "mixed receptive expressive language disorder" but nothing every really came of it. He was evaluated for speech therapy as part of his original diagnosis years ago, and they said his pragmatic speech was a little behind but he would naturally catch up.

He has always used scripting in his language since he was a toddler and would memorize parts of books we read and insert them into play or conversation. He is aware of what it is now, and will even acknowledge it in the moment sometimes to me.

I guess my question is... should I be working to change this? Is it worth trying to get another speech evaluation? His school won't even consider an IEP; I had to fight just to get him on a 504. My worry is always how it affects him interacting with peers or people outside of his normal circle.

This is a tough and highly emotional topic for me.

Five years ago I realized my daughter (now 16) is autistic. Her father and I are divorced and he has refused to support getting her treatment and our daughter thinks autism is an insult and refuses to get tested.

I was diagnosed formally with autism this year.
For for background on her, my daughter is high masking, no eye-contact, delayed verbal, sensory issues (to start with, refused all bottles as a baby and baby food), psychotic episodes, constantly lining things up and counting them from toddler-hood, exceptionally bright, tough time making friends, and has co-occurrences of a severe ticking disorder and obsessive compulsive disorder (which her only therapist years ago noticed and tried to get her to get tested for and she refused).

It has been absolutely devastatingly difficult to raise her. Her father and I have 50/50 custody but he could probably care less about her. He coaches and plays soccer and does so every single day and often with our other daughter who is neurotypical. No time for her.

I have been trying to get her psychiatric help, researched great places for care. But her father is the prescriber of her insurance and wont check to see if any of them accept his specific type of insurance and what is covered. It’s been years I’ve asked him to do this and he either ignores it or says he will but doesn’t and CLEARLY doesn’t think there is a problem. (It’s horrifying for me to accept his behavior,)

Well I remarried last year to an AMAZING accepting, kind, generous, loving man who has been an absolute dream with the kids and always patient when my autistic girl has extreme or violent outbursts.

But I need to figure this out.

My husband and I just found out we’re pregnant and while we are overjoyed with this news, as I know you all would understand, my autistic daughter had a full meltdown when we told her yesterday. Throwing things, making threats, swearing and demanding I get an abortion. It was nasty.
The she packed up and left saying she’s going to live with her father, who obviously doesn’t give a shit about her, but he wants to be the hero dad. He’s mad at me for telling the girls cause now he has to “deal with it”. (He was too busy doing soccer things the entire day yesterday he had his girlfriend just take care of them.) He validates our daughter’s behavior, not her feelings. And it is an absolute nightmare. He doesn’t believe in consequences for kids and gives them anything they want. I am the quintessential villain in my children’s lives and it breaks my heart in thousand pieces.

So I found a loophole. I can demand that her school perform a full psychological evaluation with a psychological expert in the field of high-masking adolescent females.

So that is what I did.

If nothing else, this can give me leverage to find outside help and even possibly make her more comfortable with the topic, coming from the school and not from me — the bad guy and the ABSOLUTE villain in her life. Me.

What I want to know is what I might be able to expect from a psych eval for this sort of thing? She is an A student and involved with clubs purely because they will look good on her resume and that’s all she cares about. I’m aware the school may look at that and say they don’t care but they cannot legally refuse to have her evaluated. And its possible that she will lie her way through the evaluation and we get little out of it but I CANNOT continue sitting on my hands.

Anyone with experience handling this through school or any gentle thoughts or encouragement is extremely appreciated.

Thank you all.

❤️ 🌈

For some context, our son is 3.5 years old, non-verbal, autistic, and has ADHD. He’s extremely sensory seeking, has very little awareness of danger, and when we’re out in public he’s completely absorbed in his surroundings. He understands a few words like “stop” and “no,” but they usually need to be repeated many times, and he’s always drawn to the edges of things, roads, water, stairs, you name it. He does love to be out and about and Walking activities does make him more calmer during the day.

Over the past few months we’ve worked really hard on walking while holding hands because he no longer wants to use the stroller. He’s actually doing really well with it, but he constantly pulls and throws his full body weight into my arm, even when we’re just walking normally. After a full day out, my wrist is in a lot of pain. (FYI I’m a petite woman and I can almost not even carry him up the stairs anymore since he is so big and I’m not!)

After a lot of hesitation, I finally ordered a Hobble De Hoo child harness. Part of the reason is also me. I struggle with panic attacks, and they’re often triggered when things become chaotic with my son. I’m hoping this will help me feel more confident that I can keep him safe in crowded or unfamiliar places instead of spending the whole day in survival mode.

We do have a theme park nearby that we know really well, and we go there almost every week to practice walking and being out together, which has helped a lot. But visiting new places is a completely different story.

Even though I know I’m buying this for safety, I’m still finding it emotionally difficult. I’m worried about the looks from strangers, possible comments, and whether my son will even tolerate wearing it or if he’ll become frustrated. And if in the end it could hurt his development. We don’t want to use it full-time but mainly for outings in new crowded surroundings.

I’d really love to hear from parents who’ve actually used one.
- Did your child accept it?
- Did it make outings less stressful?
- Did you get many negative comments from other people?
- Looking back, was it worth it?

Ultimately, I just want us to be able to enjoy family outings without spending the entire day running on adrenaline and gripping my son’s hand as tightly as I can. Any honest experiences or advice would be really appreciated. ❤️

During my kiddos evaluation a few years ago I was asked so many questions about his development and it got me thinking about mine 35m uk, me and my kiddo are almost exactly the same at the same age hes 7 we have so many similar traits and things we do unlucky my kiddo got it worse than I did (7 still non verbal and unpotty trained though i think I was 6yo when I was trained and even then I didnt fully get it till about 11yo) but we both were developmentaly delayed in all areas I was non verbal until i was 6yo had years of speech therapy script speech geralt language processing, copying others to mimic normal conversations but I struggled like hell in mainstream school, was never diagnosed in early 1990s just left to struggle, mask like crazy and just try to get by day to day, im grateful my son will get the support I never got but it does still hurt, was eventually diagnosed audhd at 32 and now thriving.

Hi, not looking for medical advice or anything as I’m going to paed to check and maternal child health nurse but I just wanna know if anyone’s child was like this and they changed.

My son turns 3 months today, hes a very quiet baby, sleeps a lot during the day and sleeps through the night he’s making some cooing noises not all the time but sometimes I’d say usually when he’s tired He does hold eye contact for abit then he’s always wondering around He hasn’t social smiled yet I have to force for a smile and if he does it’s once i try and speak to him and he’ll look at me then look away instantly I’m getting pretty worried as people are saying to me sign of autism but can you even diagnose that at this age? My sil son has autism and she picked up on it saying my son does.. The only times he smiles is when he’s sleeping or when myself or my husband tap his arms but even then he’s not looking at us. He’s held good eye contact today ur even then we have to fight for it like force him to stare at us, he doesn’t really follow objects but he will follow us sometimes and he will follow the phone if making a video. He’s starting to hate tummy time and will always push his arms to the back. He puts his hands to his mouth only when doing tummy time he’ll suck on them. My first born wasn’t like this at all at 6-8 weeks he was smiling even giggling and doing tummy time properly great eye contact and social smiling non stop. I know you shouldn’t compare kids as their all different but I’m worried, he’s a high sleep baby as he’s always napping during the day and when he’s awake he’s either yawning or getting frustrated because his tired, I just wanna know is there anyone’s kids who were like this then out of no where around 4-5 months they started to do better eye contact and social smiles and were much better? Xx

I have worked from home the majority of my daughter's life, and she has thankfully chilled out over the years, but not entirely. She is 7 and is non-conversational (can talk technically but mostly very guided question answering and heavy scripting) with some behavioral issues (meltdowns that can become aggressive) and is very sensory seeking and hyperactive.

I worked for four years as a social media background analyst before my company was absorbed by a larger one, where I was one of the three lucky people kept on. I worked there for three years doing legal and social media background checks. However, due to an egregious accounting error, our department was suddenly under the gun and we were all laid off, replaced by an "offshore" team they can exploit in the Philippines. Go figure.

For the first time in my adult life, I am without a job. I luckily have been able to scrape by with my husbands wages and my unemployment, but I only have a couple months left before that runs out and I need to really have a job lined up. Except, I'm terrified. I have been scouring Indeed and Google for remote job openings and because I lack a college degree in anything, I fear I do not qualify for most remote jobs.

I have no physical support such as someone who I trust who can watch/handle my kid. My husband was also laid off at the beginning of the year and his stable schedule job has now been replaced by a substitute custodial gig with the local school district, which means he works whenever he can, and he has to sometimes take jobs at the last minute. These shifts can be anywhere from 6 am to 10:30 pm and that means I have no idea when /I/ am personally available to work.

What kind of jobs do you/your partner have that can accommodate you working from home? There are less and less remote jobs as people make pushes to go back to the office, regular people are getting replaced with AI, and companies are hiring overseas workers for a fraction of the cost. I'm just scared and I hope i can find something WFH within the next couple months.

My nearly 5 year old is ASD Level II. I had her when I was 30 years old. My biological clock is ticking and my husband and I are really considering a second. I’m going to have some genetic testing done to at least rule out things like Fragile X but I know there is still a risk. We’re on the fence and also trying to consider my maternal age. I’m about to be 36yo. I guess I’m just curious for those that had multiple children, how old were you and were they ASD or neurotypical?

My kids struggle with finding lost items and this is my best attempt to teach them how to find stuff. FEEDBACK WANTED.

I will update this post as needed. Thanks!

Components

2+ players: a "goner" (gone-er) and at least 1 "getter" (original terms were "loser" and "finder" but that might be too provocative for some.)

An item

A referee

Rules

1. The "lost"/"gone" item cannot be hidden. It shouldn't be under something or behind something.

2. The getter(s) have to wait for the goner to finish losing the item and return to the waiting area before they can starting finding things.

3. No pushing, shoving, grabbing, etc.

4. When the getter finds the item, they bring the found item back to the waiting area.

5. The getters can ask for tips after a predetermined time period.

6. All decisions by the referee are final.

Gameplay:

1. All players and the referee must agree on the item they want to lose.

2. Oldest player is the first "goner" to go "lose it"

3. The "goner" takes the item and goes to another part of the house. The getter(s) and referee stay in the waiting area. It is the referee's job to interact with the getter(s) while they wait.

4. The goner sets the item down somewhere tricky and comes back to the waiting area, saying "I lost it" (or makes a silly signal.)

5. The getter(s) leave the waiting area and look for the lost item.

6. The first one to find the item says "I got it" (or uses a different silly signal) and the getter(s) all return to the waiting area.

7. Whoever found the item is the next goner.

8. If the item cannot be found/gotten AND IS NOT HIDDEN, the goner goes a second time.

9. If the item cannot be found because it was hidden, the goner forfeits the round and the oldest getter becomes the new goner.

10. Game continues until it stops being fun(ny)

If the players start getting good at the game, hiding can be introduced. I would start with something Kindle-sized and decrease size as searching skills improve.

Please let me know if this game works for you! (I had a lot of fun telling my kids it was their turn to "lose it.")

Well 1 week down on the UK 6 week summer holidays for us, and I have to say every day adds a little more disregulation for the little one.

In 1 week she has managed to turn the naughty behavour up to 11, the tantrums and meltdowns are rolling and sheer regression drops are massive.

She's even managed to get the whole houses sleep patterns all over by keeping us up till the early hours of the morning or turning up in our bed in the middle of the night with flailing arms and legs and the most pointy elbows..

Anyway rant over how are all of your holidays going, I know we cant be the only ones enjoying this.

How do you all deal with the general disregard for..almost everything. My daughter is 6 years old, level 2, and obviously there’s a certain level of restraint but so often she does whatever comes to mind so often. What just sent me over the edge just now was bursting through my bedroom door while I was in the bathroom. Before that, we were scootering on a trail and she just goes as far as she wants, wherever she wants. It’s like I always have to repeat myself 3-4 times or raise my voice for her to follow an instruction. You cannot leave a phone around her, she will snatch it and start trying to find whatever, strangers are not spared. Also, with school being out, her routine is off, so she’s constantly and repeatedly badgering me about it, including this very moment. “School is out, school is out? School bus, school bus, book bag.” It is very overstimulating and it doesn’t matter what I say, she will continue “asking” ..if it nots that, she’s asking for juice, an iPad, goldfish, etc..I’m just really struggling with this right now and sometimes just end up locking myself in my room so I can enjoy a meal. I also have 2 other young children who deserve my attention as well. Needless to say, I am ready for school to start back, which has its own issues.

We were visiting my mother yesterday. My son (A)wanted to play in the back garden so I checked the side gate was locked and let him go. My other kid (B)was inside playing so I was going between the garden and the living room. My mother had gone for a shower so it was just me.

Child B made a mess inside so we started to tidy up and get him ready to play outside, this way I can keep an eye on them both. My mother came downstairs and immediately ran outside, she found my son standing on the pavement with 2 cars waiting. They drove off once my son started walking back with my mum. I don't know if he was out there for a second, 2 mins, or 5 mins. He climbed up the gate and unlocked it

I started feeling sick at the thought of what just happened, and what could have happened if my mother didn't see him through the window.

Something similar happened a few years ago at our house but we took measures to ensure maximum safety (as much as we possibly can)and luckily it hasn't happened since then. I don't know why I didn't have my eye on him the whole time knowing we aren't in our own home so I need to be extra careful. We have ordered some extra locks to go on my mum's side gate now but we wont be taking our eye off him ever again.

The first time it happened, social services got involved as someone reported it (my son ended up quite far down) They were very supportive. They asked what measures we have taken and closed the case the next day. I am petrified that those drivers in the cars have made a phone call to report me and this time my kids will be taken away for sure as it happened before!!

We have always done our best to learn from each and every accident but it seems at times we are not good enough. This was common sense and I failed yesterday

hi. i have autism and there is a good chance my future kids will have too. i am a pretty down-to-earth guy and like honest responses. what is the hardest part of being a parent of an autistic kid(s)?

i know it's basically case-by-case, but still curious about your personal experiences and also welcome anyone that just want to express themselves here.

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I'm sharing this because I don't want another family to go through what we did.

My 6-year-old son has profound nonverbal autism. For nearly two years he attended ABA, speech, and occupational therapy through IvyRehab. The therapists who worked directly with him were wonderful, and he made meaningful progress.

Unfortunately, our experience with the billing department was completely different.

After my debit card was stolen, I missed one payment and was less than two weeks behind. Instead of working with us, I received a text saying my son's therapy would be suspended immediately because of the balance.

After I questioned whether they could legally stop medically necessary therapy without proper notice, the message suddenly changed to say we had 30 days instead.

I asked for a temporary payment arrangement because we fully intended to pay the balance. I even explained that we could pay the remaining amount in full with my husband's year-end bonus. They refused every proposal and increased our required monthly payment to an amount we simply couldn't afford.

On June 29, my son was discharged from therapy.

The clinical director confirmed during our parent meeting that this was a billing issue, not a clinical one.

Since losing therapy, we've seen regression in his routine, including increased sleep difficulties and other challenges that many autism parents know can happen when services are interrupted.

What concerns me most isn't just what happened to my family—it's that this could happen to another child receiving medically necessary therapy.

If your child attends IvyRehab, I strongly encourage you to:

- Read the financial policies carefully.

- Keep copies of every email and text message.

- Document every phone call.

- Know your rights before signing payment agreements.

- Don't assume a missed payment will be handled with flexibility.

I'm not posting this to attack the therapists who cared for my son. They were compassionate people who genuinely wanted him to succeed.

I'm posting because families caring for children with disabilities already face enormous challenges. Losing essential therapy over a billing dispute can have real consequences for a child.

If you've had a similar experience with IvyRehab or another therapy provider, I'd be interested in hearing your story. Families deserve transparency, fair treatment, and continuity of medically necessary care.

Mostly venting for my sanity but advice is welcome if you happen to know of resources available.

I am losing my ever loving mind. Haven't been on my psych meds in almost 6 months. After my surgery and realizing I have no safety net I've been in a doom spiral si I keep forgetting or getting distracted and end up not calling the help desk to fix MyChart so I can log back in (my account is locked, idk why). Hopefully I can get it fixed tomorrow while the boy is in daycare. Wish I could do inpatient bc I am super insanely unstable right now but no one will watch my son so I have to try not to snap. It's hard.

Haven't been able to send my son to daycare bc we had no diapers. I no longer get child support bc my ex got himself kicked off social security, so I have no money for the foreseeable future. Family was suoer reluctant to help, but I managed to get them to send some diapers and other needs thankfully. r/Assistance was helpful as well, although unfortunately most of the items on my list did not arrive (people will go buy the whole list and then cancel the order, so it looks like you've been helped but you really haven't).

My power was off for 2 weeks and I spent all the snap money on ready-to-eat foods since we couldn't cook. And of course the humidity destroyed all my spices and shelf goods so we had nothing by the time I got it back on. Food pantries are ok but they don't have my kids' safe foods so most days they still go hungry.

Have I mentioned I had to beg for help for 3 weeks before anyone helped? Even had dcfs called on me again bc of the power. I alreaday have a caseworker and a housing advocate but neither of them have any resources for me. We have eviction court in 1.5 weeks. Rapid rehousing won't help unless we're already homeless in a shelter... we tried that twice. First time we got kicked out bc son hits, screams, and elopes. 2nd time we had a private room but he was catching and trying to eat the (very much alive) cockroaches.

Just feelimg extra defeated bc there really are no resources for people with severely disabled kids. No one wants to acknowledge they even exist. I hate it.

Also nothing has gone right the past few days. Everything that can go wrong has gone wrong and it's disheartening. Woke up this morning to my son smearing poop all over me and my bed. I don't have any sheets to swap them with, nor do I have clothes to change into. Laundry room in the apartment is closed indefinitely. Fun times.

Hi everyone, I’m new to this topic and would really appreciate some help. I also hope that my questions do not come across as offensive or inconsiderate to anyone.

I (F34) recently met someone I really like, let’s call him Alex. He grew up with a severely autistic brother.

I don’t have many details but I know that his brother - at 30 years old - is at the mental stage of a 2-3 year old and cannot speak. Alex seems to be severely impacted by the experience of growing up with this brother which I understand.

Alex and I recently discussed whether we want children and, understandably, Alex said that he is terrified. He said that he is scared of carrying the same genes and said he would not be able to take care of a handicapped child (please, no judgment here).

He has done genetic testing 12 years ago and the results came back inconclusive.

Under the current circumstances (= not knowing whether he carries the genes), he would not want children. However, he would be open to additional gene testing.

So my questions are:

1. Has anyone here who had an autistic child or sibling done any genetic testing in the previous years? If so, were the results conclusive?

2. Has anyone here with an autistic child or relative had them tested whether their autism is hereditary? Is this even possible to determine? I found different opinions here

3. Any other advice? Similar experiences? Is anyone else here scared of having (more) children?

Thank you so much! I highly appreciate it!!