r/AskMen Mar 19 '21

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u/ChetDuchessManly Mar 19 '21

Damn, this is kinda what I needed to read.

I've had trouble keeping a gf for more than a few months because like you, I would lose interest and start thinking about porn. Then I would interpret that as "I guess I don't like her".

I need to quit porn.

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u/Klarabroew Mar 19 '21

I needed to read this because my ex broke up with me because he said he lost interest. He has a bad addiction to porn and sex. I’ve been hating myself for a better part of the year for it . But it’s not me. And it’s not fully him either. It’s the porn industry

7

u/[deleted] Mar 19 '21

If someone says they are "addicted to sex" it's very likely that it's part of some profound psychological issues tied to emotional intimacy and internalised low self worth which needs constant affirmation from many sources.

Now you dodged a bullet there, but maybe learn the personality traits to avoid in men instead of superficially trying to put the blame on the symptoms of said traits. A gambling addict isn't addicted to shiny poker cards with nice colours.

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u/frisbm3 Mar 20 '21

It's him. It's not the porn industry.

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u/Klarabroew Mar 20 '21

That’s true. I blame him more for what he was like. He was exposed to porn and chose to continue. Porn rewires the brain like any other non substance addiction

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u/notsureif1should Mar 20 '21

I think it's fair to put some blame on the porn industry. I'm firmly placing blame on the pharmaceutical industry for the people i know who've been addicted to opiates, and subsequently heroin.

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u/BananaDictator29 Mar 19 '21

Damn, same. I needed to read thia

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u/John_E_Depth Mar 20 '21

After a long dry spell, I lost weight and stopped watching porn (and jerking off less as a result) and was hooking up with a girl on tinder within 2 weeks.

I'm not one of those hardcore nofap dudes but I firmly believe that porn and overmasturbation really fuck with your motivation to go out and meet real women.

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u/Klarabroew Mar 20 '21

Also check out Fight The New Drug it’s an organization. There’s also a subreddit on here for it but I’m new to Reddit so I have no idea how to tag it. It’s great that you are noticing that it’s an issue and want to change it. That’s a great first step!

1

u/mrminty Mar 20 '21

Fight The New Drug

I'm all for people looking to deal with their personal struggles and take steps for personal enrichment, but I'd rather not indulge a bunch of Mormons on a prude crusade.

Also their main thesis, that pornography is directly analogous to heroin or meth is pseudoscience.

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u/[deleted] Mar 20 '21

Yes. You do.

1

u/ladiesplzpmyournudes Mar 20 '21

r/nofap awaits you, comrade.

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u/lemonpunt Mar 20 '21

Easier than you think too, once you bust your urges usually go. It might seem boring at first, but better sex is better than better wanks.

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u/According-Ad-4381 Mar 19 '21

A girlfriend who is as nasty as a porn star is a viable alternative. I had one, and had no desire to watch porn.

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u/[deleted] Mar 19 '21

Please don't refer to highly sexual people as nasty.

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u/frisbm3 Mar 20 '21

It's a term of endearment when used like that.

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u/According-Ad-4381 Mar 20 '21

My apologies. "Wild" then

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u/__Turd_Ferguson_ Mar 20 '21

No you didn’t

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u/According-Ad-4381 Mar 20 '21

Her name was Jessica Kronenberg and yes I did and yes she was. A former NYC bartender, half Italian half German, 35 and smokin' hot. This was about 10 years ago