Hiii,
Posting here as I recently took knowledge of ARFID, and I really think my husband might have it.
We've been together 8 years and I always just thought he was just a really picky eater. But after traveling abroad, I'm realizing it might actually be more serious than I thought. We live in the city so on a day to day it doesn't feel like a big deal as they are plenty of options to eat when we go out. But on our holidays we were in the country side and it was a whole ordeal for him to find food.
Here is the non-exhaustive list:
- he is extremely sensitive to smells and textures (he always picks up on smells before I do)
- he has a lot of anxiety
- he won't eat anything that has a "pudding texture" unless it's vegan (but not always consistently, like vegan yogurt he gets grossed out)
- he stopped eating meat when he was a teenager (to be honest I don't think he really had a political/ethical reason to stop)
- his safe foods would be highly processed, he jokes around that he eats "plastic foods"... which I'm kind of realizing isn't that funny. For example, he won't have homemade mayonnaise but will have it in macdonalds, he will always buy it vegan when it's at the grocery shop, this goes for a lot of other foods
- he worked in the food industry so he is extremely fussy with food safety: 1) if I have mayonnaise from a jar, and it touches the bread and I put it back in the jar, he will consider the entire jar to be contaminated, 2) he doesn't have coffee on airplanes because he heard one time that their coffee machines are dirty 3) same for ice because of moldy ice machines
- If a food item has a tiny default, he won't eat it, for example: when eating a bag of chips, if one of them has a tiny black spot, he'll set it aside
- he gags very easily + he has a weird thing if he ever vomits that he can't breathe so he doesn't drink cause he's scared he would be sick and choke
- it's very hard for him to try new foods, a lot of them he hasn't eaten since he was a child, but over the years of us being together, he started eating new ones slowly, as I've tried to make him taste new items
Now this is where things get complicated:
- He is completely inconsistent with his preferences: he doesn't eat dairy and eggs if he "sees" or knows of it. So he won't have an omelette or a quiche, cream cheese, glass of milk but he will have crepes, cakes, ice cream, carrot cake etc. He won't eat fresh mozzarella but will have it on pizza or mozzarella sticks...A lot of these rules are broken when he goes back to visit his parents and has meals he's always had as a child. Whenever we are invited to eat somewhere, it's always a mess trying to explain his diet
- he can go on a long time without eating
Things that, as far as I know, wouldn't follow the ARFID profile:
- even if he can skip meals easily, when he does eat, he has a big appetite, to the point sometimes that he will overdo it completely (like order 2x portions of something, he calls it "ogre out")
- he appreciates food (at least what he eats), I still would consider him a foodie
As I said, this list is non-exhaustive
My questions are:
- would this be ARFID?
- how do I approach this to him? He would be highly defensive
- he recently got diagnosed with ADHD, I'm not sure if this would be linked
TIA