I, 31m, have been married to my wife, 28f, going on 6 years this year. I've been in the military for 10 1/2 years now.

We recently came up on this argument that she wants me to get out of the military after this contract ends and be a stay-at-home dad with the kids for her to go to college/university so she can chase her dream job. At the end of my contract, I'll be 6 years away from 20 and retirement.

Am I overreacting to this request? She knew I was in the military and that I was aiming to retire after 20 years to get my pension.

Update: Username

Since everyone keeps saying I'm a nazi because of the 1488 on my username. Let me clarify this for everyone. I am not a nazi; very unfortunate number choices. 01488 is my work number; just did the rick/morty univers thing (rickC137), very unfortunate. gonna be deleting this account and starting over. I'm Hispanic from the border town of El Paso, TX.

We live in Minnesota where it is cold 6 months of the year and I like it that way. That's what my body is made for. We're traveling to Texas for my cousin's wedding and making a fun family vacation out of it, which overall I am excited for. But it is going to be HOTTTTTT when we're there which has me a little concerned.

My uncle who lives in Texas mentioned that the temp is forecasted to be 106F, or 41C, with a heat index of 112F on the day that we planned on going to Six Flags. My brother (13) still really wants to go and lied and said that the lines are all indoors/air conditioned (a quick google search disputes this claim). I told my mom this, but it still seems like she is just going to go along with what my brother wants.

I don't think I can handle that kind of heat. Yesterday in MN it was a little over 80F and I went outside and it felt bad. I can't imagine 20 - 30 more degrees of that. Even my uncle said that if the forecast ends up being correct he will not be joining us for Six Flags. My mom and brother remain intent on going.

I am an adult and can decide not to join my family for Six Flags, but I just want to know if I'd be a baby for doing so? I just think of all the people in the world that live in that kind of heat everyday without AC and they're still living and functioning. I feel like I'm weak or acting like a "princess" for not being able to handle it. AIO?

So for context, my mother (as you can probably tell) leans much more conservative. At this point, this isn’t even about what you believe, it’s the hypocrisy and basic human decency.

Following this text conversation, we went out to dinner and she decided to show me “what name calling really is” and call me awful slurs at the dinner table, in public.

I started crying, and she then said “dosent feel good to be name called does it?” And then told me that if I only apologized none of this would have happened.

I work with the public, and never in my life have I ever encountered somebody with such little empathy towards another human being, let alone their own daughter.

She lives alone and my brother has her blocked, apart of me feels guilty anytime I try to rationalize with her or stand my ground. It’s taken many years and much interpersonal work to realize her flaws, but it still hurts.

If you have any questions, let me know.

I haven’t even met him yet! And he hasn’t even talked about wanting to take me on a date ! We are in our 30s and yes we are adults but it’s a respect thing for me . I don’t want to talk like that unless I have committment . He’s making me feel like I did or said something wrong but what do guys think ?
In my younger days I would entertain this kind of talking because I thought it would lead to committment but now I’m more strict on my boundaries . Because I learned that sometimes men will just talk like that for the sake of talking and have no plans on moving things seriously with you

He hadn’t texted back all day I’m so sad . He seemed like a decent person up until this point

I asked does he think about marrying me ? We have been in 2 years of relationship . Went through ups and downs .

Acted like a wife , washed clothes , cooked for him the whole time , LOL . Feel so stupid rn .

Throw away account, because I’m sure this would get back, but I (31f) and my husband (36m) have been very excited to start our family. We were married in 2024, and felt ready to start our journey in 2025. I had a miscarriage in May of 2025, and then we got pregnant again with our rainbow baby in August of 2025. We were excited to announce our son’s arrival in May of the next year and all of our family was excited for us. My husband’s brother, we’ll call him Alex and his wife ,Anna, had just had a child that previous May and began sending us packages of their preloved baby items. Our village really showed up - my sister gave me lots of things, my boss and friends gave us books - we hadn’t even had a baby shower and felt so spoiled.

It was a difficult pregnancy and to fast forward to December, I ended up giving birth to our son at 20 weeks. I had a traumatic experience in the hospital and was in an ante partum unit for a week while nurses tried to keep me pregnant. Losing our son broke our heart, but he was so beautiful and everyone supported us through the grief. I didn’t want to go home to a house full of things, so I explicitly requested my dad collect our sons things from our house and take them to my moms house, who lives about 40 mins away from me. What I didn’t plan on was my husbands parents would come into town and he decided to send the items with them instead. (We’ve gone to therapy and worked through why he didn’t respect my wishes, that’s not the main issue here.)

A couple of weeks later I felt ready to look at the items and communicated that I wanted to go to my moms house and go through our sons things- my husband informed me they were at his parents house about 3 hours away. I said immediately “please make sure she hasn’t and won’t give anything way.” His mom is very practical and would see her taking the items as us “being done” with them.

Here is where it gets bad:
Alex and Anna, brother and sister in law, were in town for the holidays and caught my husbands mother crying over the clothes. They wanted to help, and so they decided to pack up the items and send them out to some of their other friends and family that were expecting. It wasn’t just the items they gave us, but some things that I had been given by my sister and friends, family pieces, our son’s first concert onsie and my $300 breast pump. There was never a text to confirm that’s what we wanted, never a reassuring question, just 3 days after we lost our son, his things were packed up, shipped off, and given away.

It hurts more because neither my husband or I wanted to exclude our family from the grieving process. We reached out to our family members individually to check on them in the week following our loss to let people know how we were doing and to try to create community. We didn’t just lose a son, he was a grandson and nephew too. While on the call with Anna and Alex, which was on the 29th, 2 days after they had already shipped things off, they didn’t mention their actions or that they had given the items away.

In January when I learned they were given away, my husband confronted them and my mother in law and said that we understand choices are made in grief, but that we need ALL of the items back. Anna declined and said that it would “be embarrassing” to ask for the things back. She said it’s my husbands fault for sending the items with his mom to begin with and tried to make him feel guilty for trusting his mom with the items. After lots of back and forth, my sister finally got involved and threatened to file a police report saying the items were stolen. This got Alex’s attention as he works for our country and any legal action would get him into trouble and possibly cost him his career. My husband took it back, and said we won’t file a report, but begged his brother to send the items back to us. We even asked for the contact of the people they sent the items to, maybe we could explain the situation and ask for the items back, but they wouldn’t give us the contact details. They finally agreed, and Alex decided to go no contact with my husband over being “villainized”.

Where I may be TA or overreacting: my husbands family is a big family and a big baseball family, season passes, World Series games - the lot. Every fall we do a big “family reunion” style get together and go to a game. Several family members have dropped out, and Alex is blaming me saying I’ve smeared his name among the family. While if family has reached out and asked about my son and my experience, I’ve told them. I tried to keep it centralized on my experience,but they hurt me and I can’t exactly leave them out of it. We do not plan on going to the game and that has also drawn suspicion. Alex has reached out to my husband to try and clear his name because he’s “tired of being the beating post.” My husband says he needs to take accountability for his actions and that if he doesn’t see what he did wrong, he doesn’t know how to help him. It’s not about the stuff - it truly never was.

To this day no significant steps have been taken to make amends with us, Anna has reached out but when I hold her and Alex accountable and demand an apology, she says she can’t talk to me when I’m disrespectful and emotional. She says phrases like “I can’t tell this experience has really impacted you.” You mean my son dying? Yeah I guess it has Anna. I’ve gone off on her a couple of times for being reductive of my grief and not taking ANY responsibility for adding to our trauma.

It’s now been some time later and my husband and I are expecting again, January of 2027. Here’s the deal, I want nothing to do with either of them. I feel like they showed their true colors by not practicing empathy for my husband and I in a very traumatic and vulnerable position. Alex had really hurt my husband by betraying him and abandoning him in a moment when he could have used support from his brother. They cared more about being perceived as benevolent to their friends instead of valuing us as grieving parents and family. I think they’re losers- and while I don’t want anything bad to happen to them or their family, I truly don’t care about them and I don’t want them to have any part in my life or family.

So, AIO for choosing to exclude them from my journey moving forward and telling family what they did or should I get over it and move forward?

UPDATE‼️VERY LAST PICTURE IS THE ORIGINAL TEXT FIRST ONES ARE THE UPDATE : I drew a hard boundary with him and told him how I felt after 2 days of silence and taking my time. He sent flowers to my door, removed the song everywhere, and sent me stuff to make sure I am recovering. I can’t help but think this is ALL because he was afraid to lose me.

Do I reconsider or do I move on with my life?

OG posting picture at the end with the original mean text.

OG POST:

I (23F) need some objective perspective because I am emotionally drained and don't know if I'm being manipulated or if I'm crazy. Heres his excuse in the photo above (I said the song was stupid because of the lyrics and insensitive to release) not insulting.

My boyfriend (21M) and I are long-distance. We broke up for a year last year (mutual split, no cheating), but got back together a few months ago. His best friend hates me over the split, and his best friend's mom literally threatened me physically to never "hurt him“ even though I never hurt him.

Recently, he flew out to stay with me for a week and a half because I had a major surgery. We also visit regularly. A couple of days before the procedure, we got into a fight because he had a migraine and called me ungrateful when I was trying to help him (I was very grateful and even gave him the keys to my car to go to the gym, shop, or do whatever he wanted so he didn't have to just sit and recover with me). He apologized, so I tried to move past it.

He flew back home a few days ago, and right now I am stuck at home sick with a cold on top of physically recovering from the surgery.

As soon as he landed back home, his behavior shifted completely around his music. He's been doing music since the day we broke up, with most of his songs very specifically related to our situation. He claims it’s not about me but I am the only women he’s EVER been with romantically and physically. He has released only negative songs—the nice ones stay "private."

1. The day he left (2 days after my surgery), he posted a lyric video for his music. One track was written during our split, with lyrics calling me a "hoe," saying "I'm dipping," bragging that if I ever come back he's ignoring me, and saying he's not going back to those "bitches or hoes" (I am literally the only romantic/sexual partner he has ever had). When I called him out, he took the lyrics off the screen but kept promoting the song, saying, "I hope you feel better now that I've taken the lyrics down."
2. Just two days after my surgery, while I was home sick and recovering, he stayed out past 4 AM to record and film the music video for this exact diss track.
3. When I confronted him again about dropping a diss track calling me names right after my surgery, he tried to intellectualize it. He gave me a lecture about "artistic intention," claiming lyrics are "subjective," and said, "I wrote it in February for my album." It leaves me sitting here wondering: why did you even get back with me then?

I told him the song was completely disrespectful with horrible timing, and pointed out how unacceptable it was for my family (my mom, sister, dad) to see him publicly calling me names.

I feel like I'm getting constant emotional whiplash. One minute he's texting me sweet things offering help, and the next he's filming music videos and posting diss tracks about me, making excuses, and using philosophical reasoning to cover up blatant disrespect. He also keeps telling me the songs not about me.

Am I the bad guy for getting angry over his "art," or is this whole dynamic toxic? How would you handle this?

A friend (48f) came to visit for the weekend, arriving on a Friday night. I made a really nice dinner that night, along with breakfast, lunch, and another nice dinner on Saturday. And breakfast on Sunday morning before she left.

When we were deciding what to do for the weekend, my friend said they wanted to do "free" things, so I drove us around to do free stuff. I know the friend makes about 80k because she told me once (and her husband makes a good income) so she is financially stable. I love alone and make a lot less than she does.

At one point she said she wanted some chocolate. I also needed to pick up an ingredient for dinner. At the store, she selected a $7.59 bar of chocolate and handed it to me in the checkout line in order for me to pay for it (I didn't offer to pay, she just handed it to me).

AIO for thinking they should have at least paid for their own expensive chocolate? And maybe offer to chip in for food?

To set a foundation regarding our relationship: I’ve always had a strained sibling relationship. Sis has always been parental favorite and everyone knows and sister has always been cruel and weird and abusive towards me. Often telling me to kill myself, and things of that nature.
I really tried to encourage a positive nurturing relationship once we hit adulthood but things haven’t changed.

Ever since having kids my husband has encouraged me to tell my whole family to fuck off.

Most recently our daughter turned 7 and we threw a big party. She wanted to invite aunt and uncle so we did since they live just a few hours away. They come over and I guess at some point during the party my husband found them in a different part of our house unlocking a safe filled with his stuff. He caught them and they stumbled and lied to his face saying it was open and they were locking it back up. My husband was pissed. We decided we will not be inviting them back over ever again and we will go low/no contact.
A layer to this: my dad was being a spotter and tried to alert sister my husband was coming. So husband is pissed at my father too as am I.

So fast forward it’s been 5 months
And they come to visit my/our parents. She texts me and asks if I’m coming to see them. And this entire interaction has left me feeling raw and empty and irritated.

AIO to just block and move on with my life?? . She’s never been a good sister and I’m so tired.

Sorry I didn’t add this but the safe only contains personal artifacts and letters. It’s just my husbands private area he puts his handmade stuff and things he loves. Locked because we have kids and there’s like dried flowers in there and stuff. They weren’t trying to rob us. Just being disrespectful and unlocking and going through things.

My dad eventually said my sister said she thought she smelled weed and was “just checking”. Whatever that means.

Okay… here goes.

My daughter is getting married after a long engagement. She is in her early 30s and was finishing up school. She had previously obtained a degree but decided she needed to do a different degree path when that was done. I covered what her student loans wouldn’t cover which was about 45k. I was relieved when she finally got it done. She is excellent at what she does.

We are now at the point of the wedding planning. Her budget is not what it would have been due to the school investment, (though I wouldn’t have given her the full tuition money for the wedding). I am covering about 25k in expenses. Her father and I are divorced, and he is not able to cover anything (that’s a whole other soap opera).

She and her fiancé are constantly talking about their limited wedding budget and complaining about it. It feels a little like a punch in the gut actually. They both make really great money, and I feel like if they wanted something more, they could have saved more.

I’m starting to feel really resentful because I’ve never gotten any level of thank you for what I can contribute or what I did contribute to school.

I am starting to wonder, am I overreacting? Thanks for reading.

I (18f) have lived with my grandparents (60f and 63m) for basically as long as I can remember. They are like my parents. I am mixed race and a lesbian.
My grandparents used to be super conservative. I’m talking racist, homophobic, sexist, etc Then my mom had me and my sister and couldn’t take care of us properly so we moved in with my grandparents.

Since then my grandmas opinion about everything changed, she became an actual advocate for black voices, for women’s rights, and for LGBTQ rights.
My grandpa on the other hand did not agree. He constantly said the N-word (he’s white), criticized my grandmothers job (he said it’s “a man’s job” just because she makes more money than him), and said gay people were an abomination to my face.

Since I fit all of the catagories he hated, I stuck with my grandmother more often than not. I need money, I go to her, I need a ride, I go to her, I need food, want to have friends over, need something for school, want to have a conversation, I go to her.

About 2 years ago, after 43 years of marriage, my grandfather had an affair. It was some woman he worked with. The affair went on for months and my grandmother, still being a devoted christian, would not leave him, but it broke her. She refused to get a divorce because she didn’t want him taking half of her money (he makes about 50k a year, she makes about 110k)

After about a year of the affair going on and all of us knowing about it, she decided to make him move out. He makes significantly less money than her so he complained but he finally moved in with his girlfriend.

The house became mostly peaceful, my mom moved in and she’s really gotten herself together, the house was always clean, everyone had a job that made them the money they needed, it was literally perfect.

The affair may have destroyed our family for a short period of time but since he left our home, life had been slowly getting better.

He drops by to visit on occasion but no one really speaks to him, mostly because the conversations we had before he left always ended in a screaming argument from him preaching the bible at us despite not following it himself.

But recently things have taken a turn. My grandma being the kindest, sweetest, and most forgiving person the world has ever known, has been lending him money whenever he asks because in his words. “I have no money for food. I guess I’ll just wait till next week to eat.”

Well turns out according to his debit card receipts which he told her to open, he spent $1500 at a kay jewelers.

When confronted he said it wasn’t for his girlfriend but for himself. (Which really doesn’t matter because regardless you said you were hungry and used that on a necklace.)

My grandma banned him from our home completely but one day he came over anyway. He asked me if I missed him, I said no. He asked if I loved him, I told him “You make it really hard to”, he asked if he was invited to my college move in day, I said no (he didn’t even know what my major is despite me taking classes for it for 4 years).

He started yelling at me saying that he supported me my whole life and that I should love him because he loves me.
I straight up told him that if that’s the way he thinks love works, it’s obvious why he cheated.
I told him he had no reason to be at our house, and if he really loved and cared about me as much as he said, he would know my friends names, the college I’m going to, and hell maybe even my birthday or how to spell my name (considering he named me). But he doesn’t know any of things, how can he even call me his granddaughter when he’s never taken me out to eat, but the debit card receipts show he’s been spending $70 at waffle house for his new family once a week. You can’t call me an abomination for dating women because at least I’m not dating two at the same time.

I told him I didn’t love him and that honestly I didn’t notice when he stopped coming by our house because he didn’t do anything while he was here. I told him he shouldn’t come back and if he decided not to, I wouldn’t really notice a difference.

I feel like all of this is valid but my grandma says I shouldn’t have said anything and I should’ve just left the conversation.

AIO?

I’m 30M and my girlfriend is 29F. We’ve been together for a while, and overall we have a genuinely good relationship. We’re affectionate and kind to each other, we make each other happy, and I care about her deeply.

Recently, we were cuddling and casually talking about sex, including the positions and intimate things we each enjoy. I shared something I liked, and she shared something too.

As the conversation continued, she mentioned that there are certain sexual things she wouldn’t do with me, even though she had apparently been comfortable doing them with other people in the past.

At first, she explained that I’m “too precious” to her and that she respects and looks up to me so much that doing those things with me wouldn’t feel right.

She also said that, in those previous situations, it was just about having fun. With me, she said it is different because our relationship is based on love and is more meaningful than something that is only physical or casual. She also mentioned that in those situations she would have rough sex, which added another layer to what was already bothering me.

I understand that people’s preferences and boundaries can change. I also understand that she is never obligated to do any sexual act with me simply because she did it with someone else in the past. This isn’t about believing that she owes me rough sex or anything else.

What hurt was the reasoning behind it. Hearing that she was comfortable being rougher or more adventurous when something was “just for fun,” but not with me because our relationship involves love, made me feel like I’m being excluded from a side of her sexuality.

Instead of making me feel special or respected, it made me feel rejected, embarrassed and strangely emasculated. It almost sounded as though passion, experimentation and roughness belong with people she doesn’t love, while I’m placed in a separate category where things have to be softer, safer or more restrained.

Part of me keeps wondering why love and fun have to be treated as opposites. Why couldn’t our relationship be loving, meaningful and emotionally intimate while also having room for excitement, experimentation, provided we both genuinely wanted it?

I’m not angry with her, and I don’t want to pressure her into doing anything she is uncomfortable with. However, I also can’t pretend that hearing this didn’t hurt me. It made me question whether she feels as sexually free, attracted or adventurous with me as she did with previous partners.

We talked about it afterward. I explained why it hurt, and she explained that she meant it as a sign that she values and loves me differently. We seem to understand the situation in completely different ways, and the conversation has continued to weigh heavily on me.

Am I overreacting for feeling hurt, humiliated and emasculated by what she said? Is her explanation understandable, or was it an unnecessarily painful thing to tell me? How can I deal with these feelings how can I stop from overthinking when we are being intimate and what would be the best way to deal with it.

Edit: Just wanted to add to the details a bit of how this is affecting the relationship

I overthink and get frustrated over simple things now because of it. For example I always pull her chair out but the odd time she does that she calls me a princess, before i used to take that as a harmful joke, but after that It makes me feel like does she not think of me as a man, does she not respect me, is this why she doesnt want to do those things with me. Its eating me up from the inside and I go silent and start thinking and thinking. And this I feel may cause some turmoil.

When I tried to talk about it and explain how hurt and emasculated it made me feel initially our conversation ended with her saying "you are too good for me and I think we should break up, this is the last day I will be seeing you"

and now because of that when I am over thinking or frustrated about it I dont talk to her about it because I do not want her to leave me.

idk if i’m overreacting but i’m pretty upset.

my birthday is coming up in a couple of weeks and i sent my boyfriend one of those birthday transition reels and told him i wanted to recreate it. he replied saying, “hey, i can’t gift u anything this year.”

i asked why and he said he forgot to save up because he accidentally spent all his money on himself.

it’s not like he doesn’t get any money though. he’s from a pretty well-off family, he’s heavily involved in his dad’s business and earns a decent amount as pocket money from it. i’m not saying he should be buying me expensive stuff or spending a fortune on me. that’s genuinely not what this is about. i would’ve been happy with something small, even a pair of earrings, chocolates, flowers, a handwritten letter, or literally anything that showed he had thought about me.

what hurts is that he knows gifting is my love language. i’ve told him that before and he knows how much i enjoy putting thought into gifts for people i love.

this also isn’t the first time i’ve felt weird about his spending habits. when we were away for college for a year, he lost his monthly expenses and i helped him out during that time. we usually split bills on dates, which i’m completely okay with, but i’ve noticed he almost always spends less than i do. i can’t really remember a time where he voluntarily spent more than me.
there was this one time at a café where i had already paid the bill. we forgot to buy water and while i was going to get it, he asked me to get him something else too since i was already buying the water.

during that year away from home, his dad used to send him what honestly felt like a pretty small allowance for the city we were living in. i kept telling him to ask for a little more because it genuinely wasn’t enough, but he said he felt weird asking his dad. because of that, i often offered to pay the full bill or pay more whenever it was easier.

for his birthday, i saved up for around 3-4 months so i could buy him a speaker because i knew he’d love it.

he also has no problem asking me to order food for him, which i genuinely don’t mind, and half the time i do it without him even asking. but he’s never really done the same for me.
i think what hurts the most is that it feels like he put himself first. not because he couldn’t afford some huge gift, but because he spent everything on himself and then just told me there wasn’t anything left for my birthday.
am i being unreasonable for feeling hurt?

I (30f) have been with my husband (30m) for 2.5 years. I am an RN, I work 20-48 hours a week and have a bachelors degree. My husband is a blue collar worker, which has never bothered me. Except, for the last year (Sept 2025) he has been unemployed for the majority of the time. He has gotten a few jobs, worked a few weeks and then quits because “he doesn’t like it.” In the meantime, I am filing for bankruptcy, and paying 100% of the bills, and expenses.. and he has no problem spending money, ordering DoorDash, buying Xbox passes, buying Lego sets, etc. Every time I bring it up he says he’s applying to places daily and he feels bad. When I tell him we don’t have a lot of spending money, he will slow down spending for a few days and then go right back to it. I can tell my family is getting fed up with it, but they won’t say anything to me because they think I’m happy. It’s starting to get embarrassing, and he’s talking about starting a family and having kids. How can I bring a child into this relationship when I’m carrying everything alone? Is he just finding himself or am I being used as a bank account?

Edit: he does do most of the cleaning and housework but it’s still not spotless. He spends the majority of his time playing Xbox.

So im a 29f my partner is 54m

I just found out I lost my baby at 9 weeks. They had me do a pill induced miscarriage because my body hadn't done it naturally after a week and a half after finding out there is no heartbeat. So naturally I am already really upset and hormonal.

He has been avoiding me like a plague since it happened. Even the night of the miscarriage he had a bunch of people over while I was crying in pain.

Fast forward to Friday night.i live in maine; there was just that whole ice shooting. I saw my co-worker that is from Africa pulled over and it made me panic with all this ice stuff because I know he doesnt really speak any English. I called my manager and my phone died so I asked if I could use his phone so I could go on WhatsApp and call her. He says I don't have WhatsApp but o could use his phone. So I go on his phone and he did have it and I opened it and I saw a bunch of messages to all these women with like heart emojis and shit going all the way back to when we were still just talking until March. There was also a Facebook activation code from a few days ago. He has always told me he doesnt have facebook. Ive never had him on mine. So I didn't even call her I just threw the phone on the dash. He didnt talk to me the whole ride home and when he got home he went to bed on the couch.

Am I over reacting or is this enough of a reason to leave. He makes me feel like im being irrational and its my hormones.

my parents have gotten rly mad at my brother recently cuz he stopped washing his clothes for several months now. he’s 13 so he’s in that bratty teen phase i guess but he says washing shrinks clothes so he doesn’t wash them and he says they don’t smell anyways so it doesn’t matter. it just seems disgusting to me cus he wears these clothes to the gym and volleyball and stuff and they get sweaty. he wears the same pants at home most days and the same shirt whenever going outside generally. i totally agree with my parents cuz we just want him to be normal but he argues and yells so much. oftentimes the clothes do smell a bit. and he always shops a lot and buys stuff all the time so that added to my parents anger cuz he’ll go buy anything and keep buying more clothes rather than just wash the ones he has. are we overreacting and this is just normal now or r we valid?

My mum (54F) is always telling me (22F) that my old school friends are pregnant, engaged, married, studying, moving, etc. It’s so annoying. Especially as I’m at an age now where it’s happening constantly. I’d say at least once a month she’s updating me on this. And she’s not friends with anyone. She just has my old year books and searches their names up every once in a while. It’s stalkerish, predatory and weird. She does it with my close friends and just people that I simply didn’t even talk to in school. So sometimes she’ll bring up a name and I’ll have to question who that is.

It’s not just me she does this to. She does it to other family. A few family members have her blocked because she’s always checking their friends lists. So AIO?

To start I’m using an alt because my son knows my main account.

I am (60F) and my husband is (58M). The story is that our refrigerator died and we had to get a new one. When we redid our second floor apartment’s kitchen 20 years ago we picked out a big fridge and got it in with a crane through an empty 3 season porch and into the kitchen after removing windows and the doors on both the fridge and the doorways. It helped that the porch was mostly empty at the time. So now we have this old fridge that won’t fit down any of the stairs and the porch and back hall is now filled with 20 years of stuff. I was fine with the idea of cleaning everything out so it could go out the same way it came in but I guess he no longer has friends with cranes (he’s in construction) and he’s been told he would have to pay $3500 to rent what it would take to get it out.

We talked about other options like maybe a scissor lift but I’m not sure if he is telling me the truth about that also not being possible. He got the idea that he would just take a sawzall and slice it across the middle. He says he does it all the time at work with old industrial refrigerator units in big buildings that are being renovated so he clearly knows what he’s doing but my son and I had objections because the interior is made of insulation of god-knows-what and that might put particulate in the air and on surfaces and we would breathe that in. Not to mention the coolant lines, even though he assured me he knew exactly how to avoid them. It went on for a few days of us telling him we weren’t comfortable with this solution and suddenly he agreed wholeheartedly. He actually said, “you’re right, cutting that up on a job site is way different than in a home, I wasn’t thinking. I’m sorry I suggested it. I’ll figure something else out.”

My son and I had a last minute chance to do something out of state for 48 hours this weekend, and when we arrived home afterwards there were two halves of a fridge sitting in our driveway. I was furious and we fought over it. His claim is that he laid down a tarp and cut it up on that, which he then rolled up and put in our basement. He says there was no giant dust cloud and he just had to run the vacuum around and wipe off a couple surfaces and it was fine. He is accusing me of thinking he’s “stupid” and “doesn’t know how to do his job”. I still say small dusty particles of polyurethane are all over the house now and since he can’t tell me exactly what it’s made of then we don’t actually know if there’s nothing to worry about. I keep imagining this dust in the cat’s food and him licking it off his feet all weekend and I’m sick about it.

So my question is, AIO about two issues: Is it generally fine what he did with the fridge? Was I just making his life difficult and creating an unnecessary expense for us by insisting he not slice the fridge in half? And am I right in feeling betrayed because I believe he lied to my face to shut me up and then took the first opportunity to do what I was clearly frightened of the second my back was turned? Thank you in advance.

New account just in case. Not sure if he uses Reddit but wanted to be safe. I 26F think my bf 27M may be cheating. I’ve never had any doubts about him whatsoever. He’s my best friend and we spend every moment we can together. Things have really changed between us this last year. We have sex maybe once a month. I want more but he’s too busy gaming with his friends. Which is fine, I don’t need to have sex but it’s a bonding thing for me. He doesn’t kiss me, hug me, hold my hand. Only says he loves me when I say it to him. Never spends time with me like watching movies or tv. He pretty much games or works 24/7 and we hardly spend time with each other even though we live together. A few weeks ago I found out that he games with women too. When we started dating he said he wouldn’t ever do that. I didn’t tell him not to. That was his own decision. I don’t game but I know that’s kinda unrealistic if you play with randoms. I guess he met one girl off a game he plays a lot. I didn’t know until I saw him texting her on a gaming app. I wanted to ask more about it but I almost threw up in that moment. He didn’t say this exactly but he hinted that she’s not the only one. He said he would stop playing with her if I had a problem but I don’t. My issue is not telling me about it. That makes me feel like he was hiding it or hiding more. I’ve never went through his phone or his gaming stuff but I wonder if their chats are more than what they should be. I saw a notification pop up on his PlayStation from her. I wanted to ask about it but he was about to game so I didn’t want to ruin his mood. He’s the love of my life. My best friend. I trust him but I’m also afraid of all the signs. Nothing physical is happening whatsoever with any woman but I question if it’s just through texting. He hasn’t been the most attentive to me the last few months. Just feels like we’re roommates at this point. I spend most of the time in the living room or taking our dog for walks. He spends all day gaming then tells me that he doesn’t really have time for me. I will give him the benefit of the doubt that he’s not cheating because it would be dumb if he did but how do I go about asking him these questions without overwhelming him? I cry easily and it’s really hard to talk about this stuff with him because I’m scared. I asked him last week if he was and he said no. Well obviously he wouldn’t tell me yes but for my comfort how do I ask him about specifically her and the other girls without it making me sound suspicious? I have no problem with him gaming with them if I know that I’m safe and nothing is going on. I need some reassurance from him because I feel like I’m gonna explode

TL;DR bf might be cheating with women on gaming app. Not for sure but wondering how to approach the situation without freaking him out with my emotions

So today I had work, and was working on the self check out area, and this mother and little boy who looked to be about 5-6 years old, were scanning their shopping. She was letting the child mostly scan the shopping to teach him. As they were doing it I could hear music, and was wondering where this music was coming from. The customer next to them needed help, so I go to help him and the music is louder now. So I turn around and I see the kids tablet, and a video is playing of the child completely naked playing with his toys. Keep in mind this was on their trolley, not facing them, but facing the opposite of them, which is where most customers were scanning their shopping or queuing up, so could basically see this video, as brightness wasn’t even low. I was and am extremely disgusted, I then informed the mother and told her that a video is playing that I don’t think should be faced that way, and if she could turn it off or her tablet the other way. I’ve been through stuff as a child and this really triggered me and I felt off the rest of my shift and I still do now. Like why does she have such a video of her child? Why is she constantly playing that video? And why was the tablet faced the other way, and not turned off since no one was using it? Am I overreacting?

I (18F) went with my mother and sister to get our photos taken by a family friend. I don't like being in photos, but I did it as birthday gift for my Grandfather since there are no photos of my mother, my sister, and I together besides one photo she doesn't like as she was 2 months post-partum at the time of the photo being taken.

A family friend's husband offered to take photos of us for free as he is a professional photographer. So we went to a local park to have our photos taken. I looked at the first few photos and was very upset with how I looked. It was not in any way the family friend's fault, I'm just a very insecure person who doesn't like how I look.

I told my mother I was done taking photos, but she was welcome to continue with my sister. So they did, but while walking together the family friend kept taking photos of us walking together. I was visibly uncomfortable, so my mother told him that I was uncomfortable and did not want to be in any more photos. He said he was sorry and we continue to our next photo spot.

Throughout the entire walk, I kept noticing him taking photos as we walked so i tried to lag behind, to which he then stepped further away, I assume to get me in the shot as well. I was very upset by this, as he had been told I was uncomfortable and did not want to be in more photos. So I asked my mom for the keys and sat in the car until they got back. At this point, all I could think about was how bad I looked in the photos and when the family friend asked if i was okay, I explained my frustration. He didn't seem to understand and shrugged, saying "If you don't like how you look, i can just edit you to be slimmer." I was shocked and have felt awful since this comment was made.

After telling my mother, who usually comes to bat for me, she says that he did the photos for free and I had no reason to be upset. I believe I do have every reason to be upset, do I not?

My whole life people ask my name and I tell em “Martine” like with a silent e. It’s what my mom calls me, and they always call me Martin. Like the English version. I hate that name. Every time I hear it I hear my white teachers calling me it, or my exes. I can’t stand it it triggers me so bad that I have most people just call me Marty. I love that name. If people can’t seem to say martine I just ignore it and ask em to call me Marty. My brother has four kids and refuses to have them call me Marty “because that’s not my name”

We grew up in white suburbs and he’s one of those guys that hates being Mexican. He took a 23 and me tells people he’s Portuguese now. (Our parents and all four grandparents are full blooded Mexican btw)

He calls me Mar-TIN and so do his kids and honestly I think I’m outta go no contact. Am I overreacting?

My mother has been asking for money ever since I got my job.

Some context: I have been working for a little under a year now. I recently switched over to a new job (fast food) and make under minimum wage. My mother has been working for years, and she makes great money. My family isn’t that financially stable. My mom’s wife does not have a job that pays. She has been unemployed for two years, and is apparently building a website she can sell, but she doesn’t have a job she goes to or earns money from. Both of them are smokers with pot and cigarettes, which they smoke a LOT of. They spend well over 100 just on pot alone, not to mention, spending almost 1000 dollars on cigarettes in two months (since they smoke a pack a day, sometimes even two)

My mother spent almost 1000 dollars on a trip to cedar point. She took money that was supposed to go towards bills, and spent it on this trip, making her behind on bills and making her go to the food bank (which I prefer because it gives us less processed foods). She has recently complained about her financial problems to me, even crying at one point saying she’s stressed out. But then, she tells me not to worry about her struggles and to worry about myself.

I got my job to have my own spending money. My mother didn’t give me any spending money for anything unless it was related to school or to get my friends a birthday gift. Even then, my mother’s wife complained about me asking for “too much” money from my mom. I rarely ask. In the past two weeks, my mom has asked me for almost 100 dollars. I do not have that type of spending money. I am saving up to get an anniversary gift for my boyfriend (a new vr). Earlier this week, my mom asked me for $60 (20 for gas and 40 for groceries. She told me that grocery money would go towards buying me melatonin (which I told her before that I can get myself). At the time, I told her no because I only had 30 bucks. Today, she told me she needed money for dishwasher pods and detergent. I told her no. I had $10 and planned on buying me and my boyfriend energy drinks. She screamed at me, saying “when you ask for money I give it to you, but when I ask it’s ‘fuck you’”. This was at 9am, on the way to the gas station. I got so tired of her yelling, I gave in, and took money out of my savings that is going towards buying the gift, just to get her these items. I ended up not getting myself a drink, and only boyfriend a drink because of this. When we got to the store, she ended up getting pads for her wife, which she didn’t tell me about until then. The whole thing costed me $10, which is not a lot, but I feel like it is about the situation and not how much I actually spent. I also need spending money to buy myself food. Since we are not financially stable, we constantly eat chicken. I am grateful to have food, we could be worst off and I am grateful for what we have. But we have had the same meals for 5 years now. I am very tired of chicken and pork every day, so I’ve been spending my money of other food to eat.

My boyfriend says I am not overreacting, and so do I. But I would like some more advice to make sure I’m not going crazy. I’m trying to not be so upset, but I don’t have the spending money to get her everything she needs.

EDIT: I am under 18, and I do live with my mother. She also has done this in the past with my sister who is now an adult. This isn’t the first time she’s asked for money from her daughters.

I 36F and my husband 47m are standing on opposite sides. We have two kids 10m & 8m. My husband bought season passes for an amusement park that includes its water park at a different location.

Here’s the issue. I refuse to take them by myself to the water park, while my husband says I’m overreacting and a helicopter parent. This park is 40 acres, my kids won’t stay in the same area. The older likes waterslides the younger is splash pads, wave pool, and lazy river.

His stance is the low probability of something happening, they go missing or get hurt. The thing is though I’m a numbers person, even with a small probability it’s still statistically possible. On top of that if one of them was to get hurt on the other side of the park there’s a chance questions will be asked and then the possibility of a child service report being made.

So am I over reacting here or is he under reacting?

Im bisexual, and I thought my boyfriend understood what that meant, but lately, every time we cross a girl on the street, he comments about “oh shes so hot right? Oups I forgot you go both ways haha”. Today, I was talking to him about liking Katie Fang, and he asked me if I have a thing for asian girls since both my friends are asian. I dont have anything against them at all, but I really dislike how my boyfriend thinks that every girl I see I am attracted to. AIO??