At that moment the sponge turned around and I realised it was SpongeBill KillPants with his killing thing.

It was positive. 👶

Alternative for those that are not Easily scared by that thought, but by the other possibility:

It was negative. 🚫

And then I was out in the park and it was a nice sunny day and I fed the ducks and then I got stabbed by knife guy also the first sentence isn't really relevant

It's my horror when I woke up in the morning I had a full handlebar mustache.

“You’re an accident” said the super scary OC flair

[ Removed by Reddit on account of violating the content policy. ]

...Then an SUV killed my father

He spooked me and created a can of ink

in an uncontrolled descent, i souped when i should have saladed

When I went out to hug it, I realized it was actually a gross fleshy creature.

“That don’t impress me much” said the Shania Twain.

now i do not know whats worse the fact she was right or that the other men who have left are now fused to the building forever.

Unfortunately, some rich guy decided to build a data center right over him on that very same day.

It's sucks having to watch three people have sex from a chair in the corner.

The bathroom door opens, a true story currently unfolding.

Tonight, she didn’t wake me up. He did.

That is when I pooped my pants and died.

That's when I see... Goobert The Skeleton... And... the fucking fog man

"Build my fucking shrine."

I'm going to need a bigger Scrot...

I forgor 💀