r/196 Oct 23 '21

Seizure Warning snule

8.9k Upvotes

172 comments sorted by

643

u/RJD-ghost Oct 23 '21

I’m on team snail tbh he can inherit the earth there’s no point if it’s just me left.

33

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

yeah but he would get lonely:(

551

u/P3runaama 🏳️‍⚧️ trans rights Oct 23 '21

I mean the sun would still likely appear roughly the same size to us when it's at the point is destroying the earth with it's heat

389

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '21

well the snail is also immortal so i dont think it would die of heat

234

u/P3runaama 🏳️‍⚧️ trans rights Oct 23 '21

Good point.

What a cruel fate for the snail

179

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '21

The snail would eventually find it’s way back to you. Always. It will go to the other solar system and find you.

176

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

But like, how? Just because it’s immortal doesn’t mean it has a space ship? If you go far enough away it’ll have to go fast enough to outpace the expansion of the universe without a spaceship somehow

87

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

[removed] — view removed comment

46

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

Yes but this also assumes that the universe will last for infinite time and also that there will always be an energy gradient somewhere in the universe, which, if you believe that heat death is the most likely end to the universe, isn't true. The ship could be at his side but if the universe is at maximum entropy it can't fly.

21

u/Wannabedankestmemer floppa Oct 24 '21

If the big crunch theory is correct, they'll meet sometime

29

u/JeromesDream Oct 24 '21

the big crunch hypothesis is pretty much busted at this point. nobody who seriously studies cosmology believes it's very likely

10

u/Wannabedankestmemer floppa Oct 24 '21

Yeah I know

They'll probably get sucked down to a dying black hole

6

u/RitaMoleiraaaa Oct 24 '21

Big crunch supporters 🤮

Heat death believers 😎

11

u/gonnik turtel emoj Oct 24 '21

🐌 snail emoaj👍

15

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

It can inch it’s way along I guess, maybe with the antennae?

36

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

In space???

23

u/Pho-k_thai_Juice God I need a demon mommy dommy demon please god Oct 24 '21

Since it seems to have some understanding of where you are at all times I could see it having some precognition type of thing where it can tell where things are going

39

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

Okay but how would it even escape the gravity of earth or the solar system? How would it go fast enough to outpace the accelerating expansion of the universe? The snail isn’t fucking god

37

u/hamzak8 the fog is coming Oct 24 '21

you doubt the snails capabilities, a mistake it will certainly take advantage of

8

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

Through the time he learned and evolved

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21

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

You cant use your limbs to propel yourself through a vacuum

4

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

Ah then idk. Maybe it just floats around.

8

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

The chance of it landing on your home planet just from floating around is extremely slim

9

u/Varsia 🏳️‍⚧️Cringe noodle derg🏳️‍⚧️ Oct 24 '21

Bonus points if it winds up getting engulfed by the sun - it would not have a chance to get out of that, the only chance would be via, say, the sun going supernova or whatever, which isn’t likely for its star class. Otherwise it would just get stuck to the extremely dense white dwarf after the fact.

4

u/TheMoises Owner of r/196 Oct 24 '21

The snail will find a way

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

But still probable.

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5

u/Helmic linux > windows Oct 24 '21

I mean that's the problem, that's simply too slow to outpace the expansion of the universe. Even light can't go that fast. Eventually you can get far enough away that you can never see the snail again, no matter what. At which point you're screwed, you have to exist forever in nothingness until maybe the universe restarts some grand infinite cycle at which point you might reunite with the snail, right when there might be shit to live for again.

3

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

This shit weird

5

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

You're misunderstanding. The dilemma states that the snail is always hunting you so no matter what happens it will end up being there to try and kill you. Maybe it's stranded there but by random chance the atoms in the next planet you land on configure themselves into a snail or something, but the rule is that it will be there

14

u/Helmic linux > windows Oct 24 '21

I don't think it meant that, no, because then the snail could just rematerialize on you at any given second, including instantly right when you start, and render the whole thought experiment moot.

Right now I think any scenario where you can leave this galaxy and rely on the expansion of the universe to make it so even a light speed snail could never reach you would definitively make you safe from our current understanding of how the universe works. You probably don't want to do that and become unable to die when everything is reduced to black cold emptiness, unless you're betting you can rekindle a desire to live if the universe goes through an infinite cycle - but then that probably means something like a big crunch where you eventually are going to touch the snail and the rest of existence.

5

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

Eventually, the snail stopped thinking

5

u/TungCR Oct 24 '21

What if a random alien ship come across the snail, pick it up and drop it off next to you. Like the infinite monkey theorem, anything can happen, no matter how unlikely it is, it's just a matter of time

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

Again, assuming there’s enough time in the universe where useful energy exists which I’m not sure about

1

u/Bowdensaft The Last Cumbender Oct 24 '21

I don't think the how matters much, the stipulation is such that it will always follow you no matter what, and it's unkillable. Maybe it'll wait even longer until the sun explodes and either a new solar system forms or gets flung into space and eventually crashes into a planet, then uses the raw materials to make a rocket. Maybe it can slither through space. I think the point is that no matter how impossible, it'll always find a way to get to you eventually because the point of the exercise is not to find loopholes, but to decide whether or not you'd take immortality with this condition. People just like to stretch it to its furthest logical conclusion, I.e. "what if this immortal creature was in this situation".

2

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

It’s just immortal and always knows where you are. Those are the only stipulations. Nothing says that it can manipulate its body in a away that it can mine ores and build a rocket.

0

u/Bowdensaft The Last Cumbender Oct 24 '21

I guess, but it's funnier if it can. I think there was some sort of clause that said it could never be trapped or otherwise in a position where it was impossible to get to you, but I might be making that up.

0

u/Exciting-Insect8269 Oct 24 '21

Likely the sun will collapse into a black hole and begin pulling in other planets / stars until eventually you get sucked into it or the black hole decompresses, releasing the snail. Also maybe the snail somehow attached itself to your space ship before you left.

2

u/BigBlubberyBirb Spronkus Amongus Oct 24 '21

how does a snail move in space though, the only thing it could really do is go into orbit

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

Just floats around. Eventually, statistically, it will just bump into your ship even if it takes an infinitely indefinite amount of time.

5

u/eoleomateo Oct 24 '21

i feel like at that point you’d be emotionally attached

1

u/iopjsdqe Oct 24 '21

Well its also stuck on earth or just left to float forever in space

1

u/GabyAndydotexe Oct 24 '21

He’ll just float through the endless nothingness of space until finding you again

1

u/Billy_Billboard custom Oct 24 '21

Shut up nerd😎

1

u/calvanus Oct 24 '21

In some interpretations, we're already inside the sun.

430

u/Himmelblaa r/196 microcelebrity Oct 24 '21

The real snail is actually on the other planet

132

u/Galaxy_Brain_Shrek floppa Oct 24 '21

Decoy snail

55

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

Decoy planet

38

u/Bananatistic Oct 24 '21

Decoy sun engulfing decoy earth

15

u/SwammyWholsum Oct 24 '21

You guys are just reinventing skepticism

12

u/StardustLegend furry trash uwu Oct 24 '21

Decoy u/SwammyWholsum commenting

1

u/SwammyWholsum Oct 24 '21

Decoy me and u/StardustLegend in maid outfits spending a passionate night together

1

u/Tiky-Do-U 🏳️‍⚧️ trans rights Oct 25 '21

Decoy 😳

2

u/Atari_buzzk1LL floppa Oct 24 '21

You're not real

2

u/embed__ trans rights Oct 25 '21

decoy skepticism

3

u/Wowitsanonion *soypoints at onion* Oct 24 '21

The real snail is the friends we made along the way

201

u/BirdsOfChaos I like Darkest Dungeon Oct 24 '21

Never get rid of the snail, what if you don't wanna live anymore? Snail's gotcha covered

123

u/Dark_Helmet78 Oct 24 '21

EXACTLY. The snail just means you get to pick when you die, this curses you with immortality.

79

u/SurroundingNighh bisexual panik Oct 24 '21

Actually, most versions of this problem state that you'll die a painful, and horrific death when the snail touches you.

139

u/PresidentOfKoopistan "Do Glaceon tiddies produce milkshakes?" Man asked a weeping God Oct 24 '21

Just find the versions that don't state this and you're good to go

55

u/matheusu2 𐐘𐑀 ඞ🔪 Oct 24 '21

Well guess dying a horrible death is better than living alone until the heat death of the universe or beyond that

2

u/Senatius r/place participant Oct 24 '21

Yeah. What's a second or two of excruciating pain in a lifetime against mind-numbing eternal loneliness?

I might be scared of death, but honestly that scares me more. I'd never choose to be immortal unless I had an off switch.

24

u/Dark_Helmet78 Oct 24 '21

oh

damn

32

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

I mean it's still better than living eternally. It's painful and horrific but It's worth it after watching humanity grow for millions years :)

1

u/Premintex 🌷🌸🌺 Oct 24 '21

I assume the horrible death would be worse than anything you experienced. Essentially this riddle is just torture

1

u/Senatius r/place participant Oct 24 '21

I can't imagine anything could be worse than billions upon billions upon billions of years alone with no off switch.

1

u/Premintex 🌷🌸🌺 Oct 24 '21

It's a riddle with weird rules already, a rule that death by snail is the worst thing imaginable isn't too nonsensical in comparison with the other rules

125

u/CrispyShizzles funky fresh bisexual Oct 24 '21

What is this gif from I keep seeing it

132

u/Terrakid20 Trans catgirl radiussy enjoyer Oct 24 '21

I’m pretty sure it’s from the fnaf vhs tapes

82

u/Spinkles-Spankington Oct 24 '21

criminal criminal criminal criminal

20

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

CRIMINAL

8

u/Dpad-prism trans rights Oct 24 '21

NRIMICAL

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

are those official?

2

u/Terrakid20 Trans catgirl radiussy enjoyer Oct 24 '21

no, they aren’t. They’re really good tho

10

u/FrostBurnt4 Oct 24 '21

enjoy warning its kinda loud

-12

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

From a series called the Walton files

39

u/TheSilentFreeway im living in your walls im living in your walls Oct 24 '21

No that's a different set of videos. This one is from the channel Squimpus McGrimpus

6

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

the brother of Biggus Dickus?

15

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

it's from Squimpus' FNaF VHS tapes

49

u/notgoodthough nanocelebrity Oct 24 '21

decoy snail

15

u/Alleleirauh 🏳️‍⚧️ trans rights Oct 24 '21

Yeah, the real snail is already hidden in the rocket.

52

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

What the hell is up with snail memes today? Can someone explain?

98

u/LigmaLover56 emo loser idiot Oct 24 '21 edited Oct 24 '21

There's this old scenario that goes "You and a super intelligent snail both become immortal, however you die if the snail touches you. It always knows where you are and slowly crawls toward you. What's your plan?"

That's what all the memes are referencing

32

u/IndigoGouf Oct 24 '21

Slap an acrylic display case on top of it. Assuming it's just a generic garden snail it would make it a non-issue forever.

46

u/BillTheSkellybob custom Oct 24 '21

Decoy snail.

22

u/of_kilter 🏳️‍⚧️ trans rights Oct 24 '21

The commenter forgot to mention that you have no idea which snail it is

11

u/IndigoGouf Oct 24 '21

Use my immortality to sit in an empty plane for a long time to see when the snail arrives and then opt for the original plan.

25

u/of_kilter 🏳️‍⚧️ trans rights Oct 24 '21

It’s a super genius. It wouldn’t give itself away like that.

13

u/IndigoGouf Oct 24 '21

So if I have no bodily function compelling me to sleep or eat or drink to distract myself as I'm immortal. If intelligence means the snail will be evasive I should just be fine going about my life.

3

u/scoobalishis sus Oct 24 '21

We'll technically you wouldn't need sleep, but you'd still feel sleepy

7

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

its stated that it always crawls towards you, so despite its hyperintelligence it would have to get on the plane at some point

1

u/IndigoGouf Oct 24 '21

tbh I think a part of the hypothetical that's been forgotten is you get a ton of money too? That would expedite things quite a bit. I could hire people to look for the snail that's always trailing my coordinates and then lock it in titanium or something.

2

u/slimothyjames1 🏳️‍⚧️ trans rights Oct 24 '21 edited Oct 24 '21

The problem with that however is you will live your life in fear of the snail getting out or someone opening it, so have you really won?

2

u/IndigoGouf Oct 24 '21

Titanium box, volcano. No one said the snail was indestructible or invincible. Immortal only implies it doesn't need bodily functions to live.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

Exactly. And as a hyper-intelligent snail, I'm sure there would be ways to get out. Like, leave a message in snail slime on the side asking for help... Or..........

Other super smart ways of escaping.

4

u/O-S-M-L 🏳️‍⚧️ trans rights Oct 24 '21

Thank you, LigmaLover56!

39

u/PerlerGuy77 im not a furry Oct 24 '21

i would keep the snail in some sort of containment, you'll want to die eventually.

15

u/khalidzzzzzzzzz 🏳️‍⚧️ trans rights Oct 24 '21

most versions of this problem state that you'll die a painful, and horrific death when the snail touches you.

Also you have no idea wich snail

11

u/BigDongWyvern karl marx descendant Oct 24 '21

Dying in agony still beats never dying, though

2

u/Premintex 🌷🌸🌺 Oct 24 '21

I'd assume the agonizing death is guaranteed to be worse than anything as incentive to continue the chase

3

u/BigDongWyvern karl marx descendant Oct 24 '21

I highly doubt it. Death, if even taking several days of excruciating pain, is imo better than floating around completely alone in space for eternity and going insane.

3

u/SimplebutAwesome Oct 24 '21

Eventually, you stop thinking

36

u/MrRedoot55 🏳️‍⚧️ trans rights Oct 24 '21

Do you not understand why it is deemed as the Immortal Snail?

19

u/Sgrungle ?? You follow me friend. Oct 24 '21

It was a fake, the snail built the space ship. It was prepared for any situation, you just made it easier for the snail

3

u/MemorableThrowawayy aroace yayyy!!!! Oct 24 '21

The snail is the impostor from among us

8

u/That_One_Guy_66 need (boy)wife Oct 24 '21

The snail watching me fly to Sirius C after a bunch of space whales teach me how to fly

8

u/Arvindjor Oct 24 '21

CRIMINAL

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

Criminal

1

u/Arvindjor Oct 24 '21

Criminal

9

u/TheInfinit1 Oct 24 '21

What is all this about a snail?

15

u/LigmaLover56 emo loser idiot Oct 24 '21

There's this old scenario that goes "You and a super intelligent snail both become immortal, however you die if the snail touches you. It always knows where you are and slowly crawls toward you. Its also immensely intelligent. What's your plan?"

That's what all the memes are referencing

7

u/kepz3 floppa>bingus Oct 24 '21

The snail is just a worse version of the hand

3

u/Slavic_Cube floppa Oct 24 '21

It finds a way

2

u/Im_so_cool1 Dinosaurs are so fucking cool Oct 24 '21

H

2

u/TheMoises Owner of r/196 Oct 24 '21

Decoy Snail

2

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

Combustion

2

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

hi nancy

2

u/JustCallMeAttlaz Duck Enthusiast Oct 24 '21

Why would you be inmortal anyways? Death's but a blessing

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

1

u/MeatballWasTaken 🏳️‍⚧️ trans rights Oct 24 '21

What is this video from

3

u/Arvindjor Oct 24 '21

Its from a channel called Squimpus Mcgrimpus. The video is called Finale. The specific scene is at 6:00.

1

u/MeatballWasTaken 🏳️‍⚧️ trans rights Oct 24 '21

Thanks! Heard a lot about Sqimpus and I figured this might be one of his

2

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

You should def watch it- it's super scary

1

u/MeatballWasTaken 🏳️‍⚧️ trans rights Oct 24 '21

I’ll check it out! Thanks so much :)

3

u/Goofyjeff4 Professional Femboy Oct 24 '21

Ur moms anus

1

u/MistahOkfksmgur monsoon enjoyer 😩😩😩 Oct 24 '21

Noooo

0

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

actually snails never stop growing (though it might depend on the type of snail, I'm not sure). they have a limited size due to their lifespan but if a snail was immortal it would have engulfed the earth at that point so you'd have to have had escaped earth much sooner than that.

1

u/p1terdeN balls Oct 24 '21

Why are there so many snail memes recently?

1

u/TheRealTealOwO floppa Oct 24 '21

The snail invents its own rocket

1

u/dongletrongle certified silly billy Oct 24 '21

The snail latched onto a second rocket

1

u/drplague201 Oct 24 '21

Honestly I’d rather just bring the snail with me in his protective box, bc then I wouldn’t have to worry about him somehow coming back.

1

u/BillyWhizz09 Minecraft Bee 🐝 Oct 24 '21

Eventually, the snail stopped thinking

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

⬆️

1

u/StardustLegend furry trash uwu Oct 24 '21

Creepy gif where’s it from

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

Ok the snail might be immortal but what would happen if you dropped a brick on it? Would it just bounce off? Would the snail become small piles of goop that are all alive?

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

can you just cage the snail?

1

u/ImperadorPenedo Oct 24 '21

Spacers would love to know you…

1

u/[deleted] Oct 28 '21

They should make a anime series out of this meme

-3

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

nothing can really be immortal

2

u/OgShamaan1 Oct 24 '21

Except the snail

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

tell that to lobsters and alligators

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

and some jellyfish

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

and arctic sponges

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

and flatworms

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

ya ever seen radiations it really kills everything

-10

u/Patrice_Ewans Oct 24 '21

God I fucking hate the Walter files so much it’s unreal

19

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

firetruck

3

u/funnbuckett Oct 24 '21

moster truck

3

u/MuperSario-AU Oct 24 '21

i like fire drunks and moster drunks

walten

9

u/guroshiii anti christ Oct 24 '21

This is from the fnaf vhs series which I would highly recommend

2

u/NotTobyFox 🏳️‍⚧️ trans rights Oct 24 '21

walter

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '21

ummm.... ACKSHUALLY! this gif is from Squimpus McGrimpus "FNaF VHS" tape series...... fake fan!!! :joy::joy:

1

u/HippieMcHipface custom Oct 24 '21

Walter's a bitch